Today's Bizarro Casting News: WHO Wants to Play Janis?

Documenter of badass music (The Decline of Western Civilization)/totally mainstream filmmaker (Wayne's World) Penelope Spheeris is looking to merge both of her worlds with Gospel According to Janis, a film she co-wrote and is directing about a newly discovered, singing apostle called Janis. Ok, that's a lie, and a really bad one at that. It's actually about Janis Joplin, specifically her life between her move to California as a 19-year-old and her death, eight years later.

Currently trying to cast her star, Spheeris is meeting with a dizzying, often troubling array of ladies for the role. According to the British press, among those she's seen are Zooey Deschanel (breathe, fanboys), Lindsay Lohan, and Pink; in addition she hopes to meet with Scarlett Johansson in the near future, and Britney Spears is reportedly interested in the role. YIKES! Talk about a minefield. I'm going to try to control myself here and not rip into La Lohan and Miss Scarlett (Can some man please explain her appeal to me, by the way? Sexiest woman in the world? What?!) - instead, I'll just say that I'm glad Spheeris, by all appearances, is avoiding Spears like the plague. In addition (if the press reports are to be believed), the director says Pink, who rocks, is her first choice, and is likely to be kept out of the project only by scheduling conflicts - so, if all goes well, we just might be saved from watching some scrawny little girl try to play Joplin.