Mark Beall's Geek Beat: Truth, Justice, and All That Other Stuff

by Mark Beall Jul 4th 2006 // 11:03AM

Filed under: Action, Celebrities and Controversy, Fandom, Scripts, Politics, Comic/Superhero/Geek, Remakes and Sequels



Please read and fully digest the following statement before you engage yourself with today's edition of the Geek Beat. It's written in bold, for extra emphasis. Don't miss it. Ready? Okay:

The following rant is in NO WAY meant to be anything resembling a political issue. This is not a politics blog, and the last thing I want to do is open that can of worms. Please don't read the title of this article and infer its contents. This is a geek rant, NOT POLITICS. Got it? Good, let's move on.

Perhaps you've heard the angry hubbub slowly brimming in the media about this. If you are an old school Superman fan, you noticed it yourself when you watched the movie, because it jumped right out and smacked you in the face. When discussing the return of Superman, a character pondered aloud if he still stood for "truth, justice, and all that stuff." And thanks to the old television show, just about everyone on earth knows that traditionally, Superman stood for "truth, justice, and the American way." Somehow, the former doesn't quite have the zing of the latter. The basic debate on the issue goes something like this:
Angry Conservative Talk Show Host: Blah blah blah Hollywood hates America blah blah blah.
Movie Writers/Actors/Etc: Blah blah blah Political Correctness blah blah blah.
Angry Conservative Talk Show Host: Blah blah liberal pinko commies blah blah blah.
Movie Writers/Actors/Etc: Blah blah international hero blah blah blah.

And that more or less sums up the discussion which has been happening since the seemingly innocuous little line was uttered by Perry White a few days ago. There has been a lot of back and forth about why it was changed, and mostly each side just accuses the other of not understanding the world today. It probably doesn't help that the film released so close to the 4th of July. They've turned it into a big political issue, but politics isn't really my beef with the change. I know politics was involved in the decision and I understand the points being made on both sides. I think the issue the simpler, though.

Look, I understand the world isn't super keen on America these days. I understand you need your movie to sell big overseas, because you spent a TON of money on this bad boy. If you are a movie guy, and you think "hey, I need to sell this film to people who don't like America, maybe I ought to think twice about including a very American line," I get that. My personal opinions are completely irrelevant, because I didn't make the film. In fact, if you want to avoid "the American way" simply because your personal mindset doesn't like the concept, that's your prerogative. You made the film, you choose what makes the cut. Likewise, it's the prerogative of people who disagree with you to complain about it or to not watch your movie. I get that. I'm down. There's probably an ironic statement to be made here about the nature of capitalism, open debate, and personal choice being part of the American Way, but I'm too good to make that joke. Honestly, I GET the decision to hold back on this line. Not saying what my stance on the issue is, but it at least makes sense to me.

I hear you out there asking "but Mark, if the politics doesn't bother you, why are you joining the debate on this issue?" It's cool, kiddos, I've got a point here.

Okay, let me set the scene for you. It is a short time in the future, and you are just settling in to watch the new Fantastic Four flick, which has promised you a whole lot more superhero action and adventure. The ever-lovin' blue-eyed Thing finds himself on Yancy Street, surrounded by baddies and itching for a fight. He drops the trench coat, cracks his knuckles, and declares "it's time to hit some people!"

No, of course not. Ben Grimm always says "It's clobberin' time!" It's one of the most famous battle cries in comicbookdom, and fans know him for it.

Let's try again. Imagine you are watching the first Spider-Man movie. We go through the whole Uncle Ben buildup to death, Peter runs up and cradles his beloved Uncle in his arms, and Uncle Ben imparts his last bit of advice, reminding Peter "with great power comes some other stuff you've got to do."

Right? No. The long-standing and well-known line is "with great power comes great responsibility." Fans would have risen up and lynched Sam Raimi if he'd changed that line -- and rightfully so.

How about if Beast declared "oh my stars and eyeglasses," or the Human Torch dove off a building and ignited with a cry of "fire time!"? Would you just sit by and nod your head as if these were perfectly normal things to say? No, you'd be outraged at the changing of a classic line so clearly and definitively linked with a particular character.  And that's my problem with "truth, justice, and all that stuff." The writers can stop telling me about a changing world climate, an era of tolerance, blah blah blah. Don't care about politics, you messed with something that's WAY beyond you to touch. You aren't ALLOWED to make the decision to change that line, because the line is bigger than you'll ever be. People will remember "truth, justice, and the American way" for decades, and most people don't even know your name currently.

"But Mark," you ask with a quivering question in your voice, "I thought you said you were okay with the politics behind the decision. Are you really just a lying hate monger?" No, man. Like I said above, I GET the decision. I understand. But there's a MUCH easier solution here. You'd better eat some brain food though, because this is graduate level thinking. Ready?

DON'T INCLUDE THE LINE AT ALL. Wow. Crazy, right? Honestly, let's think this through. Would you be particularly offended if The Thing never said anything resembling "it's clobberin' time"? True Believers would probably be sad the line didn't make the cut, but that'd be about it. We could do without Beast saying "Oh my stars and garters" and it wouldn't be a big deal. What WOULD be a big deal is including a perverted version of the lines. You don't mess with some things. The writers, who self-righteously cling to their politically correct defense (again, a reasonable defense), could have avoided the entire controversy by simply not including the line. It was unnecessary to the film, and very few people would have complained about its absence. No offending people by including perceived American ideology, and no offending fans by messing up. But instead, you chose to take a very well-known line directly associated with a very well-known hero, and twist it around. And now you've got a mini-fervor brewing about it for no good reason. Congratulations. Stay away from The Thing, okay?

17 Comments

Tags: brandon routh, BrandonRouth, bryan singer, BryanSinger, cinema, cinematical, comic book movies, ComicBookMovies, dc movies, DcMovies, film, superman, superman returns, SupermanReturns

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)