This past Wednesday, I wrote a short piece about Fanboys, a movie dedicated to recapturing the spirit of pre-Episode One Star Wars fandom. Since penning said post (figuratively penning, of course, typing would be a more accurate word) I've been thinking about my old Star Wars fanboy nature in a fashion which can best be described as wistful and nostalgic. I'm not going to go into a long description of what Star Wars meant to me growing up, because it would just be rehashing Wednesday's post. You all know what your first and prominent geek love means to you; it outranked even Marvel in my preteen-teen and teen years of the 1990s. What I do want to discuss with you today is just an oddball observation I've made in the midst of my nostalgia bender: I don't own the new trilogy.

I've been trying to wrap my brain around why this might be. I mean, I try to keep my DVD shelf operating at a rather high standard, but let's be honest -- I own a lot of DVDs, many of which are probably of lower quality than the new Star Wars movies. Particularly given my geek leanings, I tend to buy just about any sci-fi/fantasy movie which I'm vaguely interested in, if for no other reason than to watch the making-ofs and listen to the audio commentaries. Even a bad geek flick will generally earn a few trips through my DVD player, because I am both a geek and a movie journalist. I will qualify this by saying I do have SOME standards. I don't, for instance, own Catwoman, and I've certainly never paid money for Battlefield Earth (although I do sort of like the book) or Bloodrayne. Essentially, what I'm saying is if you make a half decent geek flick with some elements I can find enjoyment in, I will probably buy your DVD eventually.To be fair, we've got to admit there were several really cool elements about the new trilogy. Like it or hate it, you can point to a dozen or more really amazing bits, and they certainly rank above some of the movies I currently own. For instance, it is hard to argue with some of the lightsaber battles in the new movies -- they fulfill everything we've dreamed about lightsaber battles since we first saw Luke swinging around his dad's blade.

And if I'm honest, I've always just presumed I'd end up owning them some day. Even after leaving the theater with the vaguely dissatisfied taste in my mouth (you know the one) from seeing The Phantom Menace for the first time, I knew I'd have the thing on my shelf someday if for no other reason than that odd, insistent dedication which comes with being a true fanboy. You know, it is the same weird need which made you read the Onslaught issues of Marvel comics.

But I don't own the new trilogy, which in turn begs the question: Am I a true fanboy? Truthfully, I don't know the answer to that anymore. I still adore Star Wars, but I don't follow it with the absurd, nearly religious conviction of the true nut job fans. I really don't know everything there is to know about the universe anymore, because I just haven't cared to invest that much time in learning about the new stuff related to my generation's trilogy. I've still got absurd knowledge of all things pre-Phantom Star Wars, but said knowledge only represents a portion of the Star Wars continuum now. Additionally, my rabid appetite for merch has been cooled to near nonexistence in the post-Phantom age.

Fanboy questions aside, the answer to my DVD question, I have finally decided, is as follows: While I am perfectly willing to buy average quality sci-fi flicks, most of these flicks do not actively remind me of how much better they should have been. Your run-of-the-mill sci-fi flick is just that -- it is average, and you know that going in. When watching the new Star Wars movies, it is hard to not be permanently thinking about how much better you really wanted them to be. It'd be like making a cardboard cut-out of my father with some interesting quips voice recorded into it. Sure, it looks like dad, and sounds like dad, but mostly, it just makes me miss my father. Why bother hanging out with a cut-out when I could just schedule a quick visit to my parents' place? When I'm really jonesing for Star Wars, I am always going to pop in the classic trilogy. That's why I can't buy the new stuff -- it just makes me wish it was something more.

I'm not ragging on you if you dig the new stuff. Honestly, I wish I was you. I envy you. And if you are a long time fanboy who owns both trilogies and it doesn't bother you in the least; if you think the new trilogy stands up to the SW heritage, good for you. Again, I envy you, I'm not mocking you. I just wish I could figure out how you do it ...

Tags: cinema, cinematical, film, george lucas, GeorgeLucas, movies, star wars, StarWars