'G.I. Joe' Moving Forward at Paramount
Filed under: Action, Deals, Paramount, Fandom, Newsstand, Comic/Superhero/Geek
Variety is reporting that Hasbro is switching agencies -- from CAA to William Morris -- just as Transformers (based on a line of one of Hasbro's most successful toys) gears up to arrive in theaters on July 3. The article, which goes on to say that William Morris will "work on contemporizing" Hasbro brands like Monopoly, Ouija, Candy Land, Clue and Trivial Pursuit, also includes one juicy nugget regarding a live-action G.I. Joe movie. According to Variety, "[WMA] reupped Hasbro's deal with Paramount Pictures to turn G.I. Joe into a live-action feature with Lorenzo di Bonaventura to produce. An initial pact had expired."
Based on a recent script review over at Latino Review, it may have been best for all parties to let that sucker expire. The draft they reviewed was apparently one penned by Skip Woods (Swordfish) and, without going into too much detail, lets just say the main villain in the film is a guy named Cool Dude. Seriously. Way back when it was reported that di Bonaventura wanted to make a buddy flick featuring Action Man (based on the British toy) and G.I. Joe -- I believe the reasoning here was to make it so the film appealed to international audiences. We're not sure if this is still the route they're leaning toward, whether or not Woods is still attached, or if an entirely new script (and writer) is currently being sought. Rarely have I seen LR bash a script like this ("I hated what Skip Woods did to G.I. JOE so passionately that I burned the script in my barbecue over the weekend. I am trying to erase the memory that I wasted two hours reading the biggest and most disrespectful piece of sh*t script I have ever reviewed for this column), and so I'm hoping Paramount and di Bonaventura do a little bit more homework before messing with these iconic characters in a way that could completely ruin the brand. Fingers crossed.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
6-04-2007 @ 12:48PM
Doogs said...
Cool Dude? Cool Dude?!?!
How could someone even think of making a G.I. Joe movie that didn't have Cobra Commander as the villain? And its not like it would be all that difficult to develop a scenario. For example...
In, I don't know, 2012, the world is shocked to learn that all the bad #%$! that has been going on - 9/11, terrorism, global warming, American Idol - has been brought about by a centuries-old, underground cabal known as Cobra. Now that the nations of the world are sufficiently off-balance, Cobra has revealed itself and launched an all-out war against happiness, freedom, cute, fluffy puppies and the American Way.
The U.S. and its allies find themselves unable to cope with the blitzkreig Cobra unleashes across the world. Their technology is beyond anything of even the U.S. military.
In desperation, a crack military unit - G.I. Joe - is formed to strike deep into the heart of Cobra's territory (Canada - why not?) and take out Cobra Commander. The crew is mostly American, with a few international members from the most lucrative foreign markets along for the ride.
Boom. There's your movie. Now go make it.
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6-04-2007 @ 1:34PM
Chris said...
hmm. Why? Oh well. I guess enough time has elapsed since the Animated movie.
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6-04-2007 @ 2:40PM
Brant said...
2012? If it were up to me, I would make it a period piece, circa 1984. You can still have all the high-stakes action and cool technology. Even the B.A.T.s. But Larry Hama's GI Joe universe is so inextricably bound together with post-Vietnam realities and Reagan-era idealism, that I really can't imagine the story set in the present day.
The US military's response to domestic terrorism became a lot more complicated after 9/11. It will be a challenge for the writers to strike the right balance between telling a classic good vs evil story without oversimplifying the complexities of terrorism.
Anyway, I always thought the first hour or so of "The Rock" was the closest we'd ever get to an actual GI Joe movie. Way to go, Paramount.
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6-04-2007 @ 4:37PM
Bear said...
Lessie, a good GI Joe Movie, A recipie...
1 Part The Rock (Good Call, Brant)
1 Part GI Jane (Scarlett, LadyJaye, CoverGirl and Jinx need to represent!)
2 Parts Punisher (in fact give the guy a Cameo - it so works!)
1/2 Part American Ninja (for the Snake Eyes / Storm Shadow Subplot)
1/2 Part Blind Fury (To Fill out the Snake Eyes / Storm Shadow Subplot)
0 Parts Tramsformers (dumbest crossover title ever!)
1/2 Part Miami Vice (just cause Cobra Island was like a second Cuba when the popped it up - can use United Arab Emerates in a pinch)
1/2 Part Bad Boys (to make up for the bad acting in Miami Vice)
1 Part Enemy of the State (for all of the cool tech toys)
Viola!
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7-06-2007 @ 1:06PM
kevind said...
In 3 paragraphs, that first post put together a story that makes sense to every person who bought a GIJOE actionfigure for the past 25 YEARS.
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