Cinematical

For the past several days, my esteemed colleagues have been posting all sorts of LIVE! On the Scene! reports from up here in Park City. (Great stuff, fellas. Seriously.) But every time I run into Kim, Erik, Eric, and / or James (which is often because I love all four of 'em as passionately as I do platonically) I get an earful of something like this: "Go post a live from Sundance entry, you lazy jerk!" -- to which I generally reply "C'mon, all I'm really doing is seeing four movies a day, so how the heck should I make an interesting LIVE! post about that? Plus, I'm here to review movies, not coo at the sight of Kirsten Dunst in our hotel lobby." But then Kim / Eric / Erik / James will shut me up with "Oh, you're a freakin' writer. Go write. Crybaby."

So now! Live from Sundance! At 2:12 am in a freezing hotel room! It's Scott Weinberg, Live from Sundance! Yes, Cinematical's wackiest Jewish person, here to deliver a random selection of Sundance Musings. Enjoy.

1. Several of my colleagues from across the interweb (I'm talking about some very fine horror geeks from sites like ComingSoon.net, Film Threat, CHUD.com, AICN, and a few others) have called me insane (to my face and otherwise) for not love-love-loving a movie called The Wackness. Apparently I'm the only human being in all of Park City who didn't really dig the film, and now I am a pariah among the flick geeks. I'm sure they'll all forgive me for expressing my honest opinion about the film. Or perhaps I just don't know what I'm doing these days. I also liked The Bucket List.

2. When you look up a movie in the Sundance guide, you're greeted with a very articulate synopsis, a very thorough listing of cast and crew members ... and a running time that's nearly always DEAD WRONG. When you're a professional flick-watcher and you're trying to schedule four or five movies a day, it really does help to have a film's accurate running time. Today, right before a screening of the surprisingly good thriller The Broken, a festival volunteer came in to inform us that the film's running time was actually 88 minutes, and not the 110 that the guide stated. We all clapped rather enthusiastically at that news, because when you're seeing four or five movies a day, "88 minutes" is like a gift from the angels.

3. Which brings me to my next point: Overlong movies that are overlong because the filmmakers think a flick is more "prestigious" at 121 minutes than it would be at, say, 95. I've seen at least four movies up here that would ABSOLUTELY improve with a few more trips to the editing bay. But apparently "longer" equals "extra important," or something like that.

4. Did everyone see Kim's photo album from the Magnolia Pictures / Alamo Drafthouse / Timecrimes party? Pretty cool stuff, right? Well I've got even MORE pictures! Full of celebrities, firemen and debauchery, too! Unfortunately I forgot to bring my camera software with me, and so you'll have to wait until the weekend for those snapshots. But a big thanks to Magnolia and Alamo for throwing Nacho Vigalondo the craziest Karaoke party since ... um ... that really crazy Karaoke party at Fantastic Fest last September. (Which is only about four months ago, but trust me on two things: It was a great party and condos don't mix well with fog machines.) I rarely attend festival parties (because late-night is for writing!), but I wouldn't have missed this one for all the nachos in Spain. Or Austin.

5. Vera Farmiga officially has thE most beautiful eyes on the planet. And Lena Headey has the world's most perfect lips. I have decreed it so.

6. I have to go outside every time I want a cigarette. Which sucks because I smoke a lot when I write. I'm all hard-boiled and grizzled that way. Oh, and it's about -15 degrees up here. All the time.

7. All of the Sundance press screenings are held in two theaters that are VERY close to one another. This is very convenient. Also very close by is a massive all-night supermarket and a shopping center full of random options. Again, very convenient. But here's the bad news: Within walking distance of "press central," there are three restaurants: a very lame Chinese buffet, a half-decent (overpriced) pizzeria, and a Burger King. (Oh, and a Quizno's, but no good Philly boy can eat at Subway or Quizno's. It's just wrong.) So to the Park City town fathers I make a humble request: Toss a Taco Bell into the mix? Better yet ... a Wendy's? Oooh, I got it: Plant one Chick-Fil-A into this shopping center and I'll never complain again.

8. Congratulations to the New York Giants for defeating the Green Bay Packers in the NFC Championship Game. I was in a screening of a very loud horror movie this afternoon, but I distinctly heard the muffled voice of Erik Davis screaming "OH MY GOD THEY WON!!!!" over the on-screen mayhem.

9. Wow. Cloverfield did $41 million in its opening weekend? Let's hear it for clever marketing and GOOD MONSTER MOVIES.

10. Thanks to everyone who's read, linked and / or commented on our Sundance coverage so far. The honest truth is that Kim, Eric, Erik, James and I are trying hard to deliver some of the best coverage out there. (And there are some great reporters in Park City, so we really have to stay on the ball.) We talk about who'll review what over dinner, and then we'll lounge around (bored) in our rooms trying to figure out which are the best interviewees to track down, and then we'll all scatter: Kim to a panel on Women in Film, Erik to rampage Main Street for some cool tidbits, James to slave away on his audio clips, Snider to yet another obscure-but-good documentary, and me to write reviews that everyone hates. We seriously hope you're enjoying the coverage, but if you're not, just remember this: It's free! C'mon!

(Special thanks to Monika B., Aston P. Martin, and Admiral W. Volk III for a LOT of extra work this week. They're doing the extra editing / publishing and all the nifty bells & whistles. And to the rest of the team who are just doing good work as always, we love you too. Trust me when I say you're currently warmer than we are.)

OK, I gotta go. Apparently Kirsten Dunst IS somewhere in this hotel, and I plan to find out where. Yikes, that sounded a little creepy. I was just kidding. Everyone knows she already has a restraining order against me.

So Live! On the Scene! From Sundance ... and suddenly very sleepy, this is S. E. Weinberg, signing off. (But not really because I have two more reviews to finish. After a cigarette.)