Live from SXSW: The Ills of the 'Explicit Ills' Premiere

The world premiere screening of Explicit Ills, written and directed by oh-I-recognize-that-guy actor Mark Webber, was tonight at the new Alamo Ritz. And while it may well be a fantastic movie, I'm afraid that's going to remain a secret for the time being, because only a couple dozen people not connected to the film were allowed into the theater.

I was with a few Cinematical crew members and other friends of ours near the front of the badge-holders' line. Badge-holders get in first, after the festival staff has admitted whatever "entourage" people are there with the film. Sometimes there are no such people; sometimes, for the high-profile debuts, there are as many as a few dozen.

For Explicit Ills, there were at least 125.

We stood there as cluster after cluster of people -- cast members and friends of cast members; crew members and friends of crew members -- filed into the theater. Finally those of us in line were allowed entrance, and our group barely made it in. Aside from the very front row, the only empty seats remaining were singles scattered around the theater. I heard them let in another seven people after us, and that must have been about it. The theater has 165 seats, and I estimate only about 30 of those wound up being occupied by actual festival-goers. The other eager would-be attendees -- and it was a long line -- got turned away.

Now, I get that it's exciting to open your film at a big festival like SXSW. But what's the point of holding a premiere if you're going to fly in your own audience? You already know THEY like it. They worked on it! Don't you want to show it to, you know, someone else?

I had to leave after about 30 minutes because the front row was giving me a headache and I wanted to give the film a fair chance. As it was, my review would have been, "Well, the bottom half of the movie looks great. But I could only see the top half with my extreme peripheral vision, or straight-on if I bent my neck waaaay back." I hope I get a chance to see the rest of the film -- the other 60 minutes and the top half -- later in the week.