Scenes We Hate: Lady in the Water
Filed under: Sci-Fi & Fantasy, Thrillers, Mystery & Suspense, Warner Brothers
There is only one press screening I can recall that caused a member of the professional media to actually stand up and begin beating his head against the back wall of the theater. I could go on about how clumsy and indulgent the film is as a whole, but I already did that to the tune of 1,500+ words here, and while my rant then was justified, I inevitably find myself curious to give the film itself another look (not today; gots me some errands). At the moment, though, I know there's at least one scene that just plain doesn't work and won't work again, and I'm hoping to make that my focus of Scenes We Hate That Don't Necessarily Gross Us Out.
See, Bob Balaban's arrogant film critic is the only one in this fairy tale who stubbornly dismiss the dilemma at hand in his apartment building -- that of some particularly nasty wolf-like creatures after one particularly obtuse nymph (Bryce Dallas Howard) -- and is consequently fated to die. What Shyamalan fails to understand is that film critics can take a joke at their expense, so long as it's a good one -- they really tend to be a self-deprecating lot -- but when he has Balaban's character smugly denounce the likelihood of getting attacked aloud, he only makes a stronger case for every real critic out there. (We would just run.)
If he simply ran and died, it'd be one thing, a cute touch on a familiar beat. But having him detach himself so much from the events as to narrate the attack before it takes place... well, I guess that's really no sillier than anything else anyone does in that movie.
And now, for your head-bashing delight...










Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
3-05-2009 @ 11:48AM
Geoffrey Boyle said...
STOP THE HATE- end this silly series of columns already.
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3-05-2009 @ 12:15PM
Jim said...
This really is an awful column feature for a film lovers website.
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3-05-2009 @ 12:16PM
William Goss said...
Hmmm, "Columns We Hate" has a certain ring to it...
3-05-2009 @ 8:57PM
Flexbob said...
I think it would be a bit more tasteful if it highlighted bad scenes in good movies. Picking the worst scene out of a dire movie doesn't take much effort.
3-05-2009 @ 1:17PM
Gray McAdam said...
I like this "Hate" series...you might not agree with the choices (hell, they are just opinions...as are most of the discussions here) but it is inevitable that everyone does hate certain scenes, so we may as well celebrate them as much as we celebrate the ones we love. Hell, I'm just as adamant about scenes I dislike as I am about ones I do.
Keep this series going, I say.
P.S. This sequence would absolutely be on my "worst film moment" list. Its just so... arrogant of Shymalanana.
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3-05-2009 @ 1:41PM
robotplague said...
This is a fine column. Keep it going, I've been agreeing with the sentiments. ALL of the Lady in the Water is cringe worthy. I truly, truly loathed this movie when I saw it. I had almost completely forget about this little nugget. Thanks for reminding me? Ha.
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3-05-2009 @ 1:50PM
Cliff said...
I agree that this Lady in the Water is one of the worst movies of recent memory, and is certainly the worst of Shyamalan's career. I also agree that this scene was pretty bad, and revealed Shyamalan's distaste for critics.
Finally, I like these columns. Not every movie is good. And discussing the bad does not weaken the detract from the positive.
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3-05-2009 @ 1:48PM
Cyhort said...
God this was an awful movie. Even worse than The Village and I didn't think that was possible. But the scenes that I hated were all the ones that showed clips from the Iraq war and then characters looking sad and depressed. I realize the entire movie was left wing anti war propaganda but they could at least attempt some subtly. But even worse than those scenes was the one where we finally find out that M Night Shaymalan himself is the only person who can save us from our wicked ways and make the poor nymphs stop crying. I wonder when he's going to take the hint and stop trying to make "statements" in his movies. People want to be entertained, not ranted at by some egomaniac.
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3-05-2009 @ 2:06PM
Todd said...
No one seems to remember the abortion that was "The Happening". I'm sorry but The Happening makes Lady in the Water look like the fxxking Coen brothers wrote it. Killer grass! Oh my!
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3-05-2009 @ 2:06PM
William Goss said...
See, but I found The Happening to be fun-bad, whereas Lady was just a drag.
Maybe in posts to come...
3-05-2009 @ 3:41PM
Kevin said...
Wow, I had already given up on M. Night before this came out, so I wasn't going to see it unless it got fantastic reviews (which it didn't). Now I kind of wish I had seen it, because if I had then this scene alone would have definitely been a big enough scar on my psyche to keep me from having paid for a ticket to The Happening. Man, this guy has made some shit movies.
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3-05-2009 @ 3:44PM
Gina said...
In all fairness (I'm a diehard M. Night fan, sorry!) this character is hardly the first to hang around and stupidly narrate an impending attack on himself when he should know better. Mortimer Brewster (Cary Grant) in "Arsenic and Old Lace," anyone?
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3-05-2009 @ 3:47PM
William Goss said...
Ah, but does he do it because he's a film critic?
3-05-2009 @ 4:25PM
totencough said...
Actually, yes. Very well said, Gina.
3-05-2009 @ 8:58PM
Tor said...
This is one of those scenes that sits on the edge between ridiculous and kind of funny.
The kicker, though, is Jeffrey Wright's line prior to it. Very, very bitchy on the part of Shymalan.
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3-05-2009 @ 11:55PM
YouFaceTheTick said...
Loved that sequence but I liked that movie and find most of M. Night's flicks lame as hell (especially Sixth Sense). Movie critics do take themselves too seriously...especially the pricks who throw their morality into a review. Loved it this scene and wish this fate would befall 99% of the movie critics on earth - they serve no useful purpose. It would have been better had it been some clown like Medved or Pete Travers dying.
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