Cinematical

Picture this: the year is 1985; a little girl is in her pajamas and seated in front of the TV entranced by the awesomeness that is Krush Groove. I've listened to a lot of music over the years, but I always came back to hip-hop. Come to think of it, I've listened to it, read about it -- heck, I've even watched every junky documentary that came my way. Not to mention that, to this day, when I hear It's Tricky, I make sure the volume is maxed out. So you would think that a Run DMC biopic would be good news, right? I don't want to sound like a pessimist, but I'm not keeping my fingers crossed, and here's why: The Hollywood Reporter announced that Notorious screenwriter, Cheo Hodari Coker, has signed to adapt Bill Adler's (the group's former publicist), Tougher Than Leather: The Rise of Run-DMC -- The Authorized Biography.

So what has me so worried? Well, if Coker managed to gloss over one of the biggest mysteries in pop music history, just what exactly does he have planned for Run DMC? But that's not all: an even bigger problem is that the film has yet to receive an 'all clear' from any of its subjects (Run, DMC or Russell Simmons). But of course that might have a lot to do with a competing biopic that Simmons and Reverend Run were shopping around last year.

There are a lot of things I love about Paul Thomas Anderson's Boogie Nights (the sight of Don Cheadle in a Stevie Wonder wig is worth the price of admission alone), but if I simply had to choose, the scene of a botched drug deal with Rahad Jackson (Alfred Molina) probably ranks as one of my favorite movie moments of all time. Why? Between the Night Ranger soundtrack and the sounds of Cosmo's cherry bombs going off in the background, I was right there with Reed Rothchild (John C. Reilly) on the couch wanting to get the hell out of that living room. I get film geek goose pimples all over as the camera settles on Dirk (Mark Wahlberg), watching his face gradually realize how far he'd fallen. At the time, it even managed to convince me that Wahlberg might be an honest to goodness actor -- a notion he's been working hard to dissuade me from ever since.

Boogie Nights fun facts:

• Paul Thomas Anderson intended for further scenes involving Rahad Jackson (Molina) that would have had him going out in a blaze of gunfire when the cops arrived on the scene.
  
  
• There are numerous references to John Holmes in the film, but this sequence is loosely based on the infamous Wonderland murders that centered on Holmes and gangster Eddie Nash in real life.

When it comes to George Clooney's political leanings, I have to tell you, I'm a little conflicted. Does it make me a hypocrite that I cringe whenever most actors wax poetic on the state of the union, but whenever Clooney gets a little high on the horse I tend to give him a pass -- maybe it's because I usually agree with him, or maybe like most of the world, I just can't seem to say no to 'The Clooney'. So while most of Clooney's political fare has been a relatively easy sell, his latest politically charged flick definitely will not fall into that category. Luckily for him, he has found the perfect partner in crime. Variety reports that Clooney has joined forces with Liberal darling Aaron Sorkin to write a script for the film version of Jonathan Mahler's book, The Challenge: Hamdan v. Rumsfeld and the Fight Over Presidential Power.

Clooney is producing under his Smoke House banner, and is reportedly looking to direct and star as the Navy lawyer, Charles Swift. Along with the Georgetown U. law professor Neal Katyal, Swift worked tirelessly to ensure a fair trail for Osama bin Laden's driver, Salim Hamdan. Hamdan was captured back in 2001, and was convicted and sentenced to 5 1/2 years for providing material support to Al-Qaeda after being held at the infamous Guantanamo Bay prison. So even if you don't agree with Clooney and Sorkin's politics -- and I can guarantee that there are a lot of you out there who don't. I'll just be keeping my fingers crossed that The Challenge doesn't keep Sorkin so busy he doesn't have time for that other legal drama we have been hearing so much about.

So where does that leave me with actors and their politics? Plenty has already been said on the subject, so I won't rehash it all here. But while Iraq movies continue to crumble at the box-office, and the only presidents we are willing to dissect are the ones long past. I have to give Clooney credit for his willingness to tackle one hell of an unpopular subject -- don't you?

I mean this is the nicest way possible, but what the hell has happened to Brendan Fraser? Let's all think back to the year 1998 when I was convinced Fraser was going to get the credit as an actor he so deserved after starring in Gods and Monsters. Then, when he took his spot as Indiana Jones' heir apparent in The Mummy, it seemed like he was slated to be the next big thing. But, here we are 10 years later, and let's just say I'm glad I didn't put any money on my earlier claims. Fraser has been happy to hang in the kiddie flick ghetto, and judging by this latest announcement, he has no plans on leaving any time soon. Variety reports that the man has just signed to star in the family-friendly flick Furry Vengeance for Summit Entertainment (since I will give credit where credit is due, I have to admit I do like the title).

Fraser will star as a land developer whose new subdivision encroaches on a band of angry critters out in the wilds of Oregon. Michael Carnes and Josh Gilbert (Mr. Woodcock) wrote the script, and Roger Kumble (College Road Trip) will direct. Considering the director and the writers are famous for slightly raunchier comedies, you have to wonder what inspired them to take a walk on the 'G' side of life.

Fraser will be heading back to drama soon enough, as he has signed to star alongside Harrison Ford in the medical drama, Crowley. Not to mention, there is talk that Fraser will be popping up in G.I. Joe later this summer, too. So while I've got nothing against family films, there is still a big part of me that hopes Fraser decides to pick more projects that require a little less mugging and a lot more acting.

Furry Vengeance will start production this summer.

I'm all for people looking to expand their creative horizons, but I know -- like most of you -- that when news first hit that Joaquin Phoenix was retiring from acting to focus on a hip-hop career, my first reaction was: Are you kidding me? Well, it looks like there's a very good possibility that's exactly what the celebrated actor is trying to do. Over at EW, a source is reporting that Casey Affleck and Phoenix are the orchestrators of a massive hoax. According to EW, Phoenix told the unnamed source, "It's a put-on. I'm going to pretend to have a meltdown and change careers, and Casey is going to film it."

EW wasn't the first to cry 'bull' at Phoenix's antics; Defamer had gotten in early on the act, and when video footage surfaced of Phoenix falling off stage and slurring his way through a rap tune in Vegas, it convinced a lot of people that his new "career change" was nothing but a big joke or gimmick ... or next year's most talked-about secret Sundance film. To be fair, it's not like this was the first time Phoenix had behaved a little strangely, so once The Hollywood Reporter announced that Affleck would be making a documentary chronicling his brother in law's music career, it gave the news a bit more weight. Meanwhile, reps for both Phoenix and Sean 'Diddy' Combs (who was apparently going to produce Phoenix's album) have declined to comment on EW's story.

Before I get started, I should probably let you know that I was a child of the 70's and 80's, so I'm used to a little more grit in children's entertainment (I mean, have you seen Jacob Two Two Meets the Hooded Fang?). But, the times have 'a-changed', and now parents are afraid to let their kids read Charlie Brown in case they get too depressed. Which is why I have to ask myself (and you) whether Neil Gaiman's Coraline will be too scary for its own audience? Focus Features have released the final trailer and an extra clip from Henry Selick's stop-motion animated tale, and it's as chock full of freaky imagery as you would expect from the man who brought us The Nightmare Before Christmas. But you still have to wonder: who was the film made for? Because it really isn't scary enough for the grown-ups, and yet it might be too intense for the kiddies (especially the wimpy ones ... only kidding).

The story of Coraline could have been taken right out of a fairy tale (like most of Gaiman's work). The action centers on Coraline, a young girl who enters a fantastical universe where everything seems to be the exact opposite of her life at home; attentive parents, constant entertainment, you name it. But here's the catch: to stay, you have to be willing to sew buttons over your eyes – and yes, it looks as creepy as it sounds.

Making a great movie poster is an art, but making a so-so one? That seems to be something that any studio can do. There are now four new character posters for the feature film version of the Real American Hero, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, and for those of you who were disappointed after only receiving head shots in the last round of one-sheets -- well, you aren't going to be much happier (that is, unless you have a torso fetish). The latest batch (see below) showcase Duke, Ripcord, Snake Eyes, Scarlett and The Baroness all in their best leather fightin' gear, which might not be much to write home about, although, I'm sure fanboys will be pleased with the tight leather outfits sported by Scarlett (Rachel Nichols) and The Baroness (Sienna Miller).

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is set ten years in the future, and, like the title says, will center on the origins of the Cobra Organization. It would seem that it will be origin stories all around, as Stuart Beattie's script also puts Duke (Channing Tatum) and Ripcord (Marlon Wayans) at the center of the action with their induction into the Joe team.

You would think that for a film expected to be a big hit this summer, there would be a little more 'oomph' injected into their marketing. But, I guess it wasn't meant to be ... yet ... and for now we're going to have to suck it up and deal with all these posters. However, there is one notable exception in all of the posters so far, and it is probably the one fans are most anxious about: good old Cobra Commander himself (as played by *Jason Joseph Gordon Levitt). Surprisingly, any images of Cobra have remained under lock and key, so I guess we'll have to keep our fingers crossed that he makes an appearance in the Superbowl trailer.

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra will arrive in theaters on August 7, 2009. Check out the new and old posters below.

Considering most of us have given up on the idea that you can make a great film from a video game, you have to hand it to someone who is still willing to try. Len Wiseman (Live Free or Die Hard) recently spoke with Bloody Disgusting about his upcoming feature based on the best selling game, Gears of War, and the big news is that he has already planned three installments of the 3rd person shooter. Wiseman tells Disgusting, "The hope is that were wanting [sic] to do a three movies and really cover the bases on everything. Basically a harder edged Lord of the Rings."

Gears of War centered on the elite military group known as the Delta Squad, and when the planet Sera is attacked by the vicious Locust Horde, it's down to the Delta to save the day. Wiseman seems to be less interested in the creatures in the story, and is going to focus instead on the bad-ass squad. When asked about the script, Wiseman told Disgusting, "It's going to be much more [on the] science fiction side of it than the creature side of it. I've always been much more of a sci-fi action fan than a horror fan,"

Wiseman will be sticking with green screen to bring the 'Hoarde' to life, saying, "the more and more I get involved with these movies and the bigger they are the more you rely on CG effects to help you out. And you can do it properly; I've been a big fan of practical work and still am, it's finding a way to incorporate them together." Unfortunately, I don't think relying on CG is the problem with most video game flicks. It might however have something to do with substandard storytelling, bad acting, and crappy dialogue; but that just might be me.

So even though Wiseman has the odds stacked against him, is there anyone out there who thinks that he has what it takes to pull off not one, but three films? Sound off below...

If there was ever a director perfectly suited to tackle a tale about warring Gods, it's Tarsem Singh (The Fall). Say what you will about the man's ability to tell a story, but there is no director working today who has more of a flair for the visually dramatic than Mr. Singh. He recently spoke with Empire magazine about his current film, The Fall, when the subject changed to Singh's upcoming fantasy tale for Relativity Media, War of the Gods. Singh tells Empire, "It's turning into, basically, Caravaggio meets Fight Club, it's a really hardcore action film done in Renaissance painting style. I want to see how that goes; it's turned into something really cool" -- I don't know about you, but he had me at "Caravaggio meets Fight Club".

Back in November, Elisabeth brought us the news that Singh had his eye on Henry Cavill from The Tudors as the Greek warrior Theseus battling against imprisoned titans. Of course, there is still the small matter of a competing flick in the form of Louis Leterrier's Clash of the Titans remake. But I have to say, I'm intrigued by Tarsem's description of War, saying, "I'm going for a very contemporary look on top of that so I'm kind of going with, you know, Renaissance time with electricity. So it's a bit like Baz Luhrman doing Romeo + Juliet in Mexico; it's just talking a particular Greek tale and half contemporising it and telling it."

I'm a big enough person to say when I'm wrong, and sometimes, I'm also a big enough person to say 'I told you so'. The new R-rated trailer for Simon Hunter's Mutant Chronicles up at IGN, and while it was nice to get a glimpse of carnage from the sci-fi actioner; I have to be honest with you; it still isn't that much better than the last trailer we got our hands on.

Mutant Chronicles is set in the year 2707, when natural resources are at an all time low, and humanity has gone 'steampunk'. When mutant creatures descend, Thomas Jane (as the leader of a Marine Platoon) becomes the last line of defence before we all pack it in and abandon the earth. Throw in some quality CGI, and a cast that includes Ron Perlman, Devon Aoki, and John Malkovich as a bad guy, and you should have had something, right?

Chronicles has earned a paltry 20% approval rating over at Rotten Tomatoes, but I guess it's the optimist in me that wants to believe the rating is the result of only a few people having seen it. Then again, even those who have weren't too thrilled with it either. Chronicles will have a limited theatrical release on April 24th, and then the film will head straight to the Sci-Fi Channel for a March premier.

So, have we all been just a little too hard on Mutant Chronicles? Are we all expecting too much? Or is there a very good reason why this film has made such a bad first impression. Take a gander at the trailer and sound off below...