Cinematicalhttp://www.cinematical.comCinematicalhttp://www.cinematical.com/media/feedlogo.gifCinematicalhttp://www.cinematical.comen-usCopyright 2008 Weblogs, Inc. The contents of this feed are available for non-commercial use only.Blogsmith http://www.blogsmith.com/Top 10 Guilty Pleasures of 2006http://www.cinematical.com/2006/12/27/top-10-guilty-pleasures-of-2006/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/12/27/top-10-guilty-pleasures-of-2006/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/12/27/top-10-guilty-pleasures-of-2006/#commentsFiled under: , , , , , , , , , , ,


I have an issue with year-end best-of lists. Or, I should say I have an issue with making them, myself. Every year I think about giving in to the tradition, but then I stop myself when I realize that I haven't seen enough movies. There are the last-minute releases of late December to wait for. There are films I missed earlier in the year that haven't yet arrived on DVD. And ever since I took a hiatus from reviewing films, it has gotten worse, because I see fewer movies than I normally do. Typically I don't discover my favorite pic of a given year until the following year or later.

So, rather than write up a list that may change tomorrow or the next day or 10 years from now, I've decided to reflect on the bad movies I saw. I've definitely seen more bad movies than good movies, anyway. But rather than make a list of the worst of '06 -- I probably haven't seen the real worst any more than I've seen the best -- I fondly recalled the movies that were crap, but were enjoyable, nonetheless.

Some of the movies on my list are wholly guilty pleasures, while others have one or two specific aspects that I found more guiltily pleasurable than the movie itself.
  • 10.) Cobra Starship's 'Snakes on a Plane (Bring It)' video from Snakes on a Plane - Sure, Snakes on a Plane is a guilty pleasure -- it was made to be. But it is just too obvious to mention it as a whole, and anyway it really wasn't as enjoyable as it should have been or was meant to be. The music video during the movie's credits, though, is another story. In my opinion it overshadows the actual movie by a long shot. It may be as self-consciously intent on producing irony and camp, but it succeeds where SOAP doesn't. Maybe because it is catchy, maybe because the band looks like a parody of contemporary hipster bands, or maybe because it is shorter -- I am far more likely to return to the video for a good laugh than to the movie (not that I'll turn off the movie on a lazy Sunday with nothing better to do; it is still a guilty pleasure, itself).

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]]>a prairie home companionAPrairieHomeCompanionfinal destination 3FinalDestination3flyboysjames francoJamesFrancolucky number slevinLuckyNumberSlevinmission impossible 3MissionImpossible3she's the manShe'sTheMansnakes on a planeSnakesOnAPlanesuperman returnsSupermanReturnsx-menChristopher CampbellWed, 27 Dec 2006 10:02:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Silent Night, Bloody Nighthttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/12/12/guilty-pleasures-silent-night-bloody-night/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/12/12/guilty-pleasures-silent-night-bloody-night/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/12/12/guilty-pleasures-silent-night-bloody-night/#commentsFiled under: , ,



With the remake of Black Christmas due to hit theaters on Christmas day, here's another yuletide horror flick from the early 70s that deserves to be rediscovered. Silent Night, Bloody Night doesn't play up the holiday connection nearly as much as the aforementioned Black Christmas, or the killer Santa movie Silent Night, Deadly Night, but it is a grim little grade-z body count movie with some great atmosphere, genuine suspense, and above-average acting. If the feel-good holiday stuff is getting to be too much for you, then this movie should help you gain some perspective. Also, since Silent Night, Bloody Night was released in 1973 (according to The Overlook Film Encyclopedia horror edition, which contradicts IMDb), and the film itself sports a 1972 copyright, it looks like this film beat Black Christmas to the horror holiday game by at least a year.

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]]>ChristmasChristmas HorrorChristmasHorrorCinemaCinematicalMary WoronovMaryWoronovMovieMatt BradshawTue, 12 Dec 2006 11:30:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: The Specialshttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/27/guilty-pleasures-the-specials/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/27/guilty-pleasures-the-specials/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/27/guilty-pleasures-the-specials/#commentsFiled under: , ,



Yup it's the holiday season, and while The Specials is not a Holiday movie, it is an oddly endearing comedy about family, albeit a dysfunctional "family" of superheroes. The Specials are the world's sixth or seventh greatest superhero team. According to the film's opening scrawl, they have spent many a day fighting both natural disasters and super villains, but today is not one of those days. This is because -- with the exception of a brief CGI sequence -- the film's meager budget does not allow the characters to demonstrate their amazing powers. What we are left with is a day or so in the life of a superhero team struggling for respectability, and it seems they're on the verge of attaining it. Kosgro Toys is about to unveil its new line of Specials action figures, which will finally put them in the same league as The Crusaders, The Annihilators, and The Anti-Evil Gang.

The team's newest member is Night Bird (Jordan Ladd), a plucky young lass with bird powers and wide-eyed idealism. We meet most of the team members as she does, and they are, at best, a quirky bunch. The group is lead by the laser-shooting Strobe, played with Shatner-esque nuances and supreme arrogance by Thomas Haden Church (who switches sides and becomes a super villain in Spider-man 3). The Strobe's wife, Ms. Indestructible, played by Paget Brewster, is carrying on an illicit affair with the team's most popular member The Weevil, played by Rob Lowe. Following a truly disastrous roll-out of The Specials' action figures, Strobe learns of the affair and dissolves the team.

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]]>CinemaCinematicalMovieRob LoweRobLoweMatt BradshawMon, 27 Nov 2006 15:01:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Deep Risinghttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/21/guilty-pleasures-deep-rising/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/21/guilty-pleasures-deep-rising/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/21/guilty-pleasures-deep-rising/#commentsFiled under: , , ,

Take a healthy dose of The Poseidon Adventure, mix it with an unconvincing (but still effective) dash of Indiana Jones-ism, sprinkle the concoction with a goofy sense of humor -- and then throw in a whole lot of guns, gore and amazingly goopy creatures. Voila! You've just made a movie that's just as good as Stephen Sommers' Deep Rising! (Heck, maybe better!)

Starring the rectangle-jawed and entirely likeable Treat Williams as a typically rascally hero-guy, the never-more-beautiful Famke Janssen as a mega-sexy thief, and a whole bunch of colorful character actors who are given maybe eight lines of dialogue and one personality trait apiece, Deep Rising is the flick Sommers made before he hit the big-time with his off-kilter rendition of The Mummy -- which he promptly followed up with two certifiable dung-heaps: The Migraine Returns and the unwatchable Van Hellstink. (Prior to Deep Rising, Sommers directed a pair of flicks for Disney: The Adventures of Huck Finn and The Jungle Book.)

So that's six whole movies that Stephen Sommers has written/directed, and yet the only one I can go back to for repeat viewings is 1998's Deep Rising. Ostensibly a monster movie in a disaster flick suit, DR benefits from a quick pace, a good deal of action, some strong doses of very visual viscera and a bunch of actors who are clearly playing the piece with tongue planted firmly in cheek. You want to talk about plotholes, lackluster editing and a general lack of actual story, I'd listen and probably agree; Deep Rising is a genre flick that wears its glitches firmly on its sleeve (and some of the CGI is really weak) but it still moves forward with such playful abandon that I'm more than willing to overlook the rough spots (most of which arrive in Act III and during a powerfully chintzy-looking epilogue) and just enjoy the flick as snack food for the cerebellum.

Plus it stands as a reminder that Sommers can get a little gritty and nasty sometimes ... when he's not beholden to a $200 million budget and forever chasing the Holy Grail that is the PG-13 rating.

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]]>deep risingDeepRisingfamke janssenFamkeJanssenguilty pleasuresGuiltyPleasuresstephen sommersStephenSommerstreat williamsTreatWilliamsScott WeinbergTue, 21 Nov 2006 10:02:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Shock Treatmenthttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/15/guilty-pleasures-shock-treatment/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/15/guilty-pleasures-shock-treatment/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/15/guilty-pleasures-shock-treatment/#commentsFiled under: , ,




I did not realize until I posted a Vintage Image of the Day for Shock Treatment that the "not a sequel" to The Rocky Horror Picture Show was one of my favorite guilty pleasures. Two days after I posted the photo, I bought the DVD and threw out my old VHS copy, so I can enjoy the highest resolution, most gorgeous images and sound possible when I indulge my secret love for the 1981 cult classic.

In my Vintage Image of the Day post, I called Shock Treatment the sequel to Rocky Horror. As others have noted, this isn't strictly true. However, some of the characters are the same. Remember Brad Majors and Janet Weiss? (Keep your audience-participation nicknames to yourself.) In Shock Treatment, the happy couple is now married, but something's wrong with their relationship, something they themselves can't quite express. The characters are played by different actors -- Cliff De Young and Jessica Harper take over the roles held by Barry Bostwick and Susan Sarandon in Rocky Horror. On the other hand, cast members from the first movie also appear in Shock Treatment, but as different characters.

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]]>CinematicalfilmJessica HarpermovieRichard O'BrienRocky HorrorJette KernionWed, 15 Nov 2006 01:03:00 ESTGuilty Pleasure: John Carpenter's They Livehttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/08/guilty-pleasure-john-carpenters-they-live/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/08/guilty-pleasure-john-carpenters-they-live/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/11/08/guilty-pleasure-john-carpenters-they-live/#commentsFiled under: , , ,



In honor of writer/director/composer John Carpenter's return to his roots with an updated version of his classic film Halloween (which, sadly, he won't be directing) and as I've already expressed my fondness for wrestlers-turned-actors, it should come as no surprise that one of my favorite films of all time is John Carpenter's classic They Live. Even though I love the movie, I do have a bit of a problem here. This is supposed to be a "guilty pleasure" piece, but I'm not so sure They Live qualifies. I do get a certain amount of pleasure from watching it, but I don't ever really feel guilty about it.

Dictionary.com defines "guilty" as "having or showing a sense of guilt, whether real or imagined" and "pleasure" as " enjoyment or satisfaction derived from what is to one's liking; gratification; delight." So, thinking about it in those terms, maybe we can call They Live a guilty pleasure after all. Here's why: the film is so good that you want to watch it over and over again spending quite a bit of your time with the movie and far less time on other things like taking out the garbage, work or talking to your family. You should probably feel guilty about not doing those things, so taking it that way, They Live does qualify. Glad we got that sorted. Now, let's get on with it.

They Live, which stars "Rowdy" Roddy Piper, Keith "Don't call me David" David, George "Buck" Flower and Meg "No Nickname" Foster, is equal parts action, sci-fi and social commentary on the state of politics and the influence of the media in modern society. The story of the film is pretty simple. A drifter with a "checkered past" named Nada, played by Piper, arrives in Los Angeles looking for an honest day's pay for an honest day's work. Unfortunately for him, he doesn't have too much luck with that plan.

Piper soon comes to realize that things in the City of Angels are not exactly what they appear to be. In fact, far from it. It seems an alien race has taken over the city with its sights on world domination. Their plan is to subjugate the human race through the use of subliminal messages all over the city forcing the humans to "marry and reproduce", realize that money is their "god", and above all, "obey." Piper stumbles on the alien's plans and with the help of a group of resistance fighters (and some cool sunglasses that allow him to see the aliens for what they are) he's off to work and ready to "chew bubblegum and kick ass." It's bad news for the aliens though, because he's " ... all out of bubblegum."

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]]>chris ullrichChrisUllrichguilty pleasureGuiltyPleasurejohn carpenterJohnCarpenterkeith davidKeithDavidroddy piperRoddyPiperthey liveTheyLivechris ullrichWed, 08 Nov 2006 08:00:00 ESTGuilty Pleasure: The 'Friday the 13th' Serieshttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/10/17/guilty-pleasure-the-friday-the-13th-series/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/10/17/guilty-pleasure-the-friday-the-13th-series/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/10/17/guilty-pleasure-the-friday-the-13th-series/#commentsFiled under: , , ,

How many horror movie series start with a good movie and then just get worse and worse? I'm talking mainly horror movies that move past the "trilogy" stage, like Halloween, The Exorcist, Hellraiser, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, A Nightmare on Elm Street, etc.

What sets the Friday the 13th series apart is that it started in mediocrity and continues in mediocrity. No one has ever been disappointed by a Friday the 13th movie; each and every one delivers exactly the same thing. A friend of mine, a beer connoisseur, once explained to me that even though Budweiser beer is bland and horrible, it's apparently a difficult task to continually brew beer with the same taste. There's something admirable, even comforting about that. When one comes to a Budweiser or a Friday the 13th movie, one attains the illusion of stability in an unstable world.

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]]>cinematicalcorey feldmancrispin gloverdavid cronenbergfilmfriday the 13thkane hodderkevin baconmovieronny yuJeffrey M. AndersonTue, 17 Oct 2006 11:09:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Night Train to Terrorhttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/10/09/guilty-pleasures-night-train-to-terror/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/10/09/guilty-pleasures-night-train-to-terror/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/10/09/guilty-pleasures-night-train-to-terror/#commentsFiled under: ,

Following in the tradition of horror film anthologies like Dead of Night, Tales from the Crypt, and Creepshow; 1985's Night Train to Terror provides an interesting spin by having each of the film's three stories distilled from a feature film. Granted, packing a full-length movie into a twenty-five minute or so segment doesn't leave a lot of room for characterization, motivation, or plot even. The film distills the horror elements of these three features into a concentrated and highly flavorful B-movie paste that goes down well with nachos and beer. The disjointed narratives lend a dream-like quality to the stories, and while they ultimately don't make a lick of sense, they sure make for a fun ride.

To connect the three tales, God and Satan are meeting on the titular train to discuss the damnation or salvation of a handful of mortal souls. The train is also carrying a jaw-droppingly awful pseudo-80s pop band, resplendent in their headbands and Flashdance-style sweatshirts. The young musicians seem perpetually stuck in music video mode, repeatedly singing an infectious (though certainly not good) tune that you'll be humming for days.

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]]>CinemaCinematicalJohn Phillip LawJohnPhillipLawMovieRichard MollRichardMollMatt BradshawMon, 09 Oct 2006 12:34:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Jackass Number Twohttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/27/guilty-pleasures-jackass-number-two/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/27/guilty-pleasures-jackass-number-two/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/27/guilty-pleasures-jackass-number-two/#commentsFiled under: , , , , , , , ,

Hey, we might not be the biggest film snobs here at Cinematical, but when it comes to Jackass Number Two, we seem to be above it. Erik was surprised and a little bit scared to see it rise to the top of last weekend's box office. James, also shocked, suggested a reason for its successful opening. Even I thought it was too stupid to bother with, and had even planned to avoid phone calls from those friends who might attempt to peer pressure me into seeing it with them. Alas, I'm an easy one to break, and on Saturday night we got boozed up with Texas-size margaritas at Dallas BBQ, headed to the theater with the liveliest crowds in Brooklyn, and watched Jackass Number Two. And, of course, I laughed my ass off. Why? Because I'm a normal human being with a sense of humor. And no attempts at being cynical, snobbish or above it could keep me from splitting my sides for almost 90 minutes straight.

I won't go so far as to say Jackass Number Two is the funniest movie of the year; I'm still sure that I'll laugh more during Borat, but it is at least the funniest thing I've seen this year. And let me point out that without the tequila and the rowdy audience, I would probably have laughed just as much. It isn't simply the ridiculous stunts and pranks and gross-out gags that makes the film so funny, either. It is the wonderful group of guys, who are constantly as curious, afraid, amazed and yes, even above the bits as their audience is. The fact that some of them occasionally show disdain for the whole project and swear off even thinking of doing a third film shows that these aren't just a bunch of idiots who like playing with fire (and snakes, sharks, terrorism, riot weapons, horse excrement and semen and, best of all, Busby Berkeley musical routines); they are witty entertainers who can take a lot of pain and suffering for the enjoyment of the viewer.

Besides, if Murderball's Mark Zupan can allow himself to be shot off a pier into a lake, then surely we can all sit through a silly film like Jackass Number Two for an hour and a half.

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]]>busby berkeleyBusbyBerkeleycinematicaldallas bbqDallasBbqfilmfilmsjackass number twoJackassNumberTwojohnny knoxvilleJohnnyKnoxvillemark zupanMarkZupanmoviesmurderballsteve-oChristopher CampbellWed, 27 Sep 2006 13:02:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Poltergeist IIIhttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/20/guilty-pleasures-poltergeist-iii/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/20/guilty-pleasures-poltergeist-iii/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/20/guilty-pleasures-poltergeist-iii/#commentsFiled under: , , , ,

Unlike our own Scott Weinberg, I am not a fan of horror films. At all. Not only do they not scare me, they typically bore me like nothing else. That said, I will admit to being scared as a child by two films, Poltergeist and Poltergeist III. The former is not that surprising to you, I'm sure, but the latter may have you questioning my credibility once again. Sure, it isn't a good movie (evidenced by its 15% on Rotten Tomatoes and its 3.6 rating on IMDb, not to mention Scott's claim that it's, "easily one of the worst movies ever made"), but it is really creepy, and it still continues to hold a unique power over me. Every time I watch it, I do double-takes at mirrors for days -- I just have to make sure that my reflection doesn't stay behind when I walk away. Okay, so really it's just that early scene with Tom Skerritt and Nancy Allen that gives me the willies, and I admit that I often lose interest half-way in, but I really do love the premise and I can't say I never watch the movie all the way through.

The thing I don't understand is how Poltergeist 2: The Other Side is lauded as being the better of the sequels. That movie, aside from giving me an early fear of tequila, isn't scary, nor does it have an interesting plot. Yes, it introduces us to the whole Reverend Kane storyline, but only as a set up to part III, in my opinion. The thing is, you can't beat any pic that primarily takes place in a tall building, especially when it deals with frightening creatures. This was the '80s, and the time had come for the haunted house to become the haunted skyscraper. It works for Ghostbusters, it works for Gremlins 2 (which came later, in 1990) and it works for Poltergeist III. I know I'm not the only one who thinks so, either.

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]]>heather o'rourkeHeatherO'rourkelara flynn boyleLaraFlynnBoylenancy allenNancyAllenpoltergeistpoltergeist 3Poltergeist3tom skerrittTomSkerrittChristopher CampbellWed, 20 Sep 2006 10:05:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Far and Awayhttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/06/guilty-pleasures-far-and-away/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/06/guilty-pleasures-far-and-away/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/09/06/guilty-pleasures-far-and-away/#commentsFiled under: , , , ,

If there's anything worse than admitting a love for Far and Away, it's probably also admitting a love for Enya's "Book of Days," the new-age singer's single from the film's soundtrack. Well, maybe I should just head off to film critic prison for this one, then, because I listened to my Far and Away CD a whole lot when I was a younger man -- and didn't even skip the Razzie-award nominated track.

Anyway, about the film: Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman play Irish immigrants who hate each other until they realize they're in love (a romantic plot that never fails!), with an epic story that traces them from their homeland, to Boston and on to Oklahoma, during the late 1800s. It is something of a historical farce, and generalization full of Irish stereotypes, which was blasted by critics and did only so-so at the box office, but I think it is Ron Howard's best-looking film, at the very least. And it exists unfortunately as Mikael Salomon's last film as a cinematographer before trying a relatively unsuccessful hand at directing. I may have had a small crush on Kidman before Far and Away, thanks originally to BMX Bandits and later to Dead Calm, but the way Salomon lit her up in one scene -- the one inside the house they've broken into, with the snow falling outside the window -- made me fall in love. And, obviously I forgive her for being incorrect in her handling of her accent (technically, Cruise's horrible-sounding accent is the correct one).

Finally, the movie just keeps building up steam, climaxing with a brilliantly staged depiction of the Oklahoma Land Rush. After the whole journey is complete, it was impossible for me not to think, as a boy, that this was what great filmmaking is all about. Of course, I was wrong, and looking back I can spot a lot more problems than I had then, but I still can't deny having a thing for it. It remains, far and away (har har), my favorite of Howard's films.

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]]>bmx banditsBmxBanditsdead calmDeadCalmenyafar and awayFarAndAwaymkael salomonMkaelSalomonnicole kidmanNicoleKidmanron howardRonHowardChristopher CampbellWed, 06 Sep 2006 16:02:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Back to Schoolhttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/30/guilty-pleasures-back-to-school/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/30/guilty-pleasures-back-to-school/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/30/guilty-pleasures-back-to-school/#commentsFiled under: , ,

You might question my picking of Back to School as a guilty pleasure. The Rodney Dangerfield movie, about a rude, millionaire businessman who enrolls in the college his son attends, was pretty well received by critics and it did really well at the box office (almost taking in $100 million in 1986). But I never enjoyed it for being a good movie. Dangerfield, while compared to Groucho Marx and W.C. Fields by Roger Ebert, always seemed to me an acquired taste. A taste I never acquired enough to enjoy any of his other pictures. When it came out, I was just a kid and I loved it in the same way I loved other dumb comedies of the '80s. When it was funny, it made me laugh and when it was slow -- take any scene with Sally Kellerman, for instance -- it made me bored. Later in life, I figured my enjoyment was based on nostalgia, though I had new appreciations in that I was then a fan of Oingo Boingo (and front man Danny Elfman) and Kurt Vonnegut, who appear in cameos as themselves.

Today, I appreciate it on another personal, rather than critical, level. As I begin college today after a ten-year hiatus, I feel somewhat related to Dangerfield's character of Thornton Melon. Sure, he was going for the first time and I'm returning after having dropped out, and he was much, much older than I am now, but nonetheless, I am an older-than-usual college student. Unfortunately I'm not rich enough to have a hot tub in my dorm (actually I won't be living in a dorm) or hire Vonnegut to write my papers on his own work. I also don't plan on wooing any professors, going out for the diving team, or doing much of what Melon does in the movie -- I would like to see if Burt Young wants the job of my bodyguard, though.

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]]>danny elfmanDannyElfmankurt vonnegutKurtVonnegutoingo boingoOingoBoingorodney dangerfieldRodneyDangerfieldthornton melonThorntonMelonChristopher CampbellWed, 30 Aug 2006 10:05:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: How to Marry a Millionairehttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/23/guilty-pleasures-how-to-marry-a-millionaire/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/23/guilty-pleasures-how-to-marry-a-millionaire/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/23/guilty-pleasures-how-to-marry-a-millionaire/#commentsFiled under: ,

I feel guilty every time I watch How to Marry a Millionaire ... and somehow I end up watching it once every couple of years. I worry I am betraying feminism by choosing to watch a movie with lines like, "Of course I want to get married. Who doesn't?" and "I know you better than you know yourself." The 1953 film follows three models who pool their money to rent a fancy apartment as part of their scheme to lure and catch rich husbands. It ought to be terribly distasteful, and indeed it is at times. By the end, I'm not particularly pleased for the women and their fates, but instead feel sorry for them. The scene in which they show off their modeling talents is almost degrading.

Despite the Fifties sexism, How to Marry a Millionaire is a lot of fun to watch, primarily due to the cast. Lauren Bacall plays the smartest of the trio of golddiggers, setting her sights on millionaire oilman William Powell, who is always charming (and a welcome relief from the usual Texas oilman stereotypes). Her roommates are Betty Grable and a bespectacled Marilyn Monroe. Monroe is wooed by a suspicious "millionaire" with an eyepatch played by Alexander D'Arcy (the singing instructor in The Awful Truth), and Grable is stuck with Fred Clark, (stuffy Mr. Babcock in Auntie Mame). If you're a fan of The Simpsons, here's your chance to see Rory Calhoun in person, playing a forest ranger, and standing and walking just like the greyhound puppy that delights Mr. Burns.

For every annoying line that recalls sexual stereotyping of the era (including Monroe's butchering of a Dorothy Parker witticism), the film offers a delightful bit of dialogue or business: Bacall trying to convince Powell that she finds older men terribly attractive: "Look at that old fellow whatshisname in The African Queen!" (who happened to be married to Bacall at the time), Grable insisting that a band on the radio must be Harry James (Grable's ex-husband), and a dream sequence in which Bacall and Monroe are both fantasizing about millionaires ... but Grable is dreaming about food. The women's resourcefulness and clever schemes are admirable even in an awful cause. How to Marry a Millionaire was one of the first films shot in Cinemascope, and the wide aspect ratio is preserved on DVD. You can enjoy every guilt-inducing moment in gorgeous color and sound.

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]]>Betty GrableCinematicalfilmLauren BacallMarilyn MonroemovieJette KernionWed, 23 Aug 2006 09:03:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: D.E.B.S.http://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/09/guilty-pleasures-d-e-b-s/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/09/guilty-pleasures-d-e-b-s/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/08/09/guilty-pleasures-d-e-b-s/#commentsFiled under: , , , , ,

D.E.B.S., about a group of schoolgirl secret agents, originally debuted in 2003 as a short and did quite well, scoring wins at a slew of festivals (mostly fests of LBGT films). In 2004, director Angela Robinson (who most recently brought us Herbie Fully Loaded) remade the short as a feature using some of the original cast members, and the result is the glorious bit of cinematic silliness known as D.E.B.S.

If you've ever seen D.E.B.S., you know exactly what I'm talking about, but if you've never seen it, well, imagine this: Charlie's Angels in high school, with short-skirt schoolgirl uniforms, high kicks, and lesbian love scenes. What makes D.E.B.S. a not-so-horrible film is that it doesn't take itself seriously in the slightest, and so when you laugh, you're really laughing with it and not at it. Mostly. I mean, there's only so much you expect to get out of a film with the tagline: "They're crime-fighting hotties with killer bodies."

The basic plot involves this group of schoolgirls (the lithe and sexy kind, natch, because it wouldn't be fun with pimply schoolgirls wearing neck and back braces ala Joan Cusack in Sixteen Candles) who are chosen for training in an elite national-defense group. Ahem. Now, honestly, the plot is just ridiculous, but that didn't stop me from loving Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and I also admit to occasionally paying attention to the Cartoon Network's squeaky-clean, lesbian-free schoolgirl-spy show, Totally Spies. D.E.B.S. starts picking up when perky blonde team leader Amy (Sara Foster) discovers she's having nefarious feelings for sexy brunette bad girl Lucy Diamond (Jordana Brewster, in a great performance).

However silly it may be, D.E.B.S. is just plain fun. You just know, don't you, that bad-girl Lucy is going to tempt super-spy Amy away from the path of goodness, and that Amy will find the badness good (there's probably an adult-film knock-off of D.E.B.S. out there somewhere -- not since Princess Leia pranced around in that gold bikini has a film so blatantly pandered to the "hormone effect"). D.E.B.S. is as much fun, in its own way, as a John Hughes teen flick or a Grease/Grease 2 double-feature -- a campy good time with a sly wink on the side. If you haven't seen it, get a group of friends together with some beer or wine, and have fun.

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]]>angela robinsoncharlies angelscinematicalD.E.B.Sfilmjordana brewstermovieKim VoynarWed, 09 Aug 2006 13:32:00 ESTCinematical's SmartGossip for July 26, 2006http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/27/cinematicals-smartgossip-for-july-26-2006/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/27/cinematicals-smartgossip-for-july-26-2006/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/27/cinematicals-smartgossip-for-july-26-2006/#commentsFiled under: , , , , , , , , ,

Finke Blasts Clerks 2 for its Never Ending Credit Roll!

A while back, we told you how The Weinstein Company partnered up with MySpace to draw more attention to Clerks 2 by awarding 10,000 fans a spot in the film's credit roll. Odd? Yes. Brilliant way to market your film for practically nothing? Hell yes. While this maneuver opened up new doors in the world of movie marketing, giving your average movie fan something to brag about, others felt the whole thing was just plain wrong. In her Deadline Hollywood blog, Nikki Finke blasts the marketing move, saying "This could very well be the most insulting thing I've ever heard, a huge diss, to anyone who's ever legitimately earned a credit on a film. It's the sort of shenanigan that, if the guilds in this town had spines, they should stop immediately." Look, I understand her point, but Kevin Smith is who he is because of his fans. They deserve the recognition. I mean, let's be real here Nikki -- these are minor credits in an indie film and Clerks 2 isn't exactly Academy Award material. Why the beef? Personally, I applaud the Weinsteins and Smith for getting the fans more involved, instead of just plastering posters here, there and everywhere. Should every film follow a similar path? No. But I do like the creative thinking.

Baby Shiloh Turned Into Wax!

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's first-born child will become the first baby to be transformed into wax for Maddam Tussaud's historic wax museum in New York City. That's right, baby Shiloh will join her parents in what appears to be an odd re-creation of the Nativity scene. I kid you not. According to the story, Shiloh will lie before her parents inside a woven bassinet "in her very own African-themed nursery." Aww, that's wonderful news -- but what about their other adopted children? I can totally picture it now: "Mommy, why does Shiloh get to be in wax and not me?" "Well Maddox, that's because adopted children aren't important enough to become wax statues. It's true. I read about it in People Magazine."

Samuel L. Jackson Hates Snakes!

While shooting Snakes on a Plane, Samuel L. Jackson was so freaked out by the slithering creatures, he had a clause put in his contract stating all motherf**kin reptiles were to be kept 20 motherf**kin feet away from him at all times. Jackson says, "My agent was insistent: 'No snakes within 20 feet.' In the beginning they were talking about having rattlesnakes they had taken the venom sacks out of them, but I was like, 'Hell, no. That don't work for me.'" Ha. You gotta love Sam Jackson. However, the actor later went on to say he wasn't afraid of snakes. In fact, when he was growing up, he'd capture the poor things and beat them to death. Hmm, perhaps that would make the perfect premise for an eventual Snakes on a Plane prequel?

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]]>angelina joliebrad pittcinematicalclerks 2deadline hollywoodfilmkevin smithKevinSmithmaddam tussaudmaddoxmoviesnikki finkesamuel l. jacksonshilohsnakes on a planethe weinstein companyErik DavisThu, 27 Jul 2006 09:05:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Bottle Rockethttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/26/guilty-pleasures-bottle-rocket/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/26/guilty-pleasures-bottle-rocket/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/26/guilty-pleasures-bottle-rocket/#commentsFiled under: , ,

It was during a playwriting seminar at the University of Texas at Austin where Wes Anderson first met Owen Wilson. In 1992, Owen brought along his brother Luke and the three created a 16mm short film called Bottle Rocket. The short, which can be viewed online (in very poor quality), caught the attention of one James L. Brooks. The producer loved Bottle Rocket so much he helped bring the project to Columbia Pictures, where it was then expanded into a feature film. Luckily for us, though unknown actors at the time, Owen and Luke Wilson were able to remain in the lead roles.

For those of you who have never seen nor heard of the film, pic tells the story of Dignan (Owen) and Anthony (Luke), two bumbling wannabe thieves determined to take their newfound career to the next level. Anderson has said the original script (which he co-wrote with Owen Wilson) was 275-pages long. Seeing as how Bottle Rocket is all about the dialogue between characters, I can see how that may have happened.

Why is this is a guilty pleasure? Well, it's weird, but most people I come across don't like Bottle Rocket. In fact, they hate it ... and I'm not sure why. Also, being Wes Anderson's first film, Rocket usually falls into the category of annoying younger brother to Anderson's second film, Rushmore. However, I love Bottle Rocket, so much I would place it among my top 15 of all time. Crazy, right? The cocky, moronic Dignan is, by far, Owen Wilson's greatest role. While its dry comedy may not be for everyone, Bottle Rocket is definitely a fun film to watch, if only to see how Anderson and the Wilson boys got their start.

Note: Those of you in and around New York City can check out a free outdoor screening of Bottle Rocket this August 1 at the McCarren Park Pool in Brooklyn.

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]]>bottle rocketBottleRocketcinematicalfilmguilty pleasuresluke wilsonmoviesowen wilsonwes andersonErik DavisWed, 26 Jul 2006 15:34:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Weekend at Bernie'shttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/19/guilty-pleasures-weekend-at-bernies/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/19/guilty-pleasures-weekend-at-bernies/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/19/guilty-pleasures-weekend-at-bernies/#commentsFiled under: , ,

When it comes to film snobbery, I talk a good game. My two favorite films (Christ, look at that -- I even call movies "films") are both French and old, I review mostly indie and foreign fare and I work myself into a lather at the news of every new Hollywood remake. But if you happen into my apartment and see me sitting on the couch with the TV on, laughing like a hyena as a dead guy being pulled behind a boat has his head smashed repeatedly into channel markers, you'll have seen the real Martha Fischer. Yes, my long charade is over: I freaking love Weekend at Bernie's.

I don't even remember the first time I saw it, but I do remember that I talked about it so much that it was the first VHS tape my little brother ever bought -- he got it for me, for my birthday. I can honestly say that I've seen the movie upwards of 30 times, and that it still slays me, every damn time. Even the throwaway lines, like "Hot enough for ya, Richard?" and "This sucks. I am so unhappy!" fill me with joy -- albeit a special, incredibly stupid kind of joy.

Continue reading Guilty Pleasures: Weekend at Bernie's

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]]>Andrew McCarthyAndrewMccarthycinematicalfilmguilty pleasuremovieTerry KiserTerryKiserWeekend at Bernie'sMartha FischerWed, 19 Jul 2006 17:03:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: The Rockhttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/12/guilty-pleasures-the-rock/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/12/guilty-pleasures-the-rock/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/12/guilty-pleasures-the-rock/#commentsFiled under: , ,

In honor of the latest Jerry Bruckheimer blockbuster, it seems appropriate to spotlight one of his productions as a guilty pleasure. I thought of going with Con Air or Pearl Harbor, but both are so ridiculously silly I don't feel guilty in finding enjoyment in them. So, I picked a movie for which my love isn't so innocent: The Rock.

The thing is, The Rock is actually a good movie. It is well-imagined, well-structured, and exceptionally well-cast. Its story is smart, its dialogue is witty and its action is overflowing. When it opened, The Rock received a respectable amount of favorable reviews, mostly from populist critics including Roger Ebert, Janet Maslin and Peter Travers. Five years later, it garnered a prestigious Criterion DVD release.

So why do I feel so guilty for liking it?

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]]>con airConAired harrisEdHarrismichael bayMichaelBaynicolas cageNicolasCagesean connerySeanConnerythe rockTheRockChristopher CampbellWed, 12 Jul 2006 13:05:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: The Last American Virginhttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/05/guilty-pleasures-the-last-american-virgin/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/05/guilty-pleasures-the-last-american-virgin/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/07/05/guilty-pleasures-the-last-american-virgin/#commentsFiled under: , , ,

Way before American Pie came along and re-defined the teenage sex comedy, there was a little film from 1982 called The Last American Virgin. When I ask people whether or not they've ever seen this flick, nine out of ten times the answer is no. However, in my mind, The Last American Virgin has every right to stand alongside beloved cheesy 80's classics like Weird Science, The Breakfast Club, Fast Times at Ridgemont High and Pretty in Pink. Why? Well, it's just that awesome. Oh, and it has an unbelievable soundtrack. Yay Journey!

When we examine the majority of teenage comedies from the 80's, themes of virginity and pregnancy are everywhere. Heck, these were big topics back then -- young girls getting knocked up, forced to find a way to pay for an abortion. And, on the flip side, virginity was being used as a major character flaw. Instead of rooting for our hero to save the day, all we wanted him to do was get laid. Today, your standard teenage sex comedy tends to stay away from any kind of heavy dramatic element like pregnancy and abortion, choosing to focus more on elaborate set pieces and raunchy jokes to carry a film.

Continue reading Guilty Pleasures: The Last American Virgin

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]]>american pieboaz davidsoncinematicalfast times at ridgemont highfilmguilty pleasuresjourneymoviespretty in pinkthe breakfast clubthe last american virginTheLastAmericanVirginweird scienceErik DavisWed, 05 Jul 2006 11:03:00 ESTGuilty Pleasures: Greasehttp://www.cinematical.com/2006/06/28/guilty-pleasures-grease/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/06/28/guilty-pleasures-grease/http://www.cinematical.com/2006/06/28/guilty-pleasures-grease/#commentsFiled under: , , , , ,

This will forever brand me as a totally irredeemable dork, but one of my favorite movies ever is Grease. I know, I know. It's cheesy. But it's fun-cheesy, and it always reminds me of long, hot summer days (and oh, those summer nights ...) spent reenacting scenes from Grease with appropriately decked-out Barbie dolls with my best friend. We'd have the Grease soundtrack playing on her rickety, battery-operated Holly Hobbie record player, which we'd sing along with full blast. The big battle, of course, was over who would get to be Sandy and who would have to be Danny. I usually won this battle, because my friend had a lower voice that was (or so I ruthlessly convinced her) far better suited toward the role of Danny Zuko than my own soprano. Grease was, hands-down, one of the favorite films of my pre-adolescence.

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]]>cinematicalfilmgreasejohn travoltamovieolivia newton-johnstockard channingKim VoynarWed, 28 Jun 2006 10:09:00 EST