Here's where I get confused: If you knew a pair of people like the characters played by Cameron Diaz and Ashton Kutcher in the new feature-length sitcom pilot What Happens in Vegas, you'd probably hate them. Undoubtedly, in real life, you'd want to punch / mock / immediately walk away from people so outrageously stupid, selfish, and insufferable. So here's my question: Why would you actually PAY for the experience of meeting two such woeful and worthless people? It's not like there's much upside for you...
Pre-packaged movie star detritus of the most inane order, What Happens in Vegas offers an I Love Lucy premise, an Odd Couple leading duo, and a Three's Company screenplay. (I mean, like, season five Three's Company, when you could spot the flaccid punch-lines the split-second the set-up is delivered.) It's not like I went in gunning for the flick, because I happen to think that A) Ashton Kutcher is a fairly funny guy, B) Cameron Diaz is still (often) a generally appealing movie star, and C) "high concept" comedy can sometimes make for one colorful and energetic night at the cinema -- but I've been to writing seminars that offer more humor, creativity, and cleverness than what's on display here. And trust me, writing seminars have none of those things.
I'm doing things a little different this week. Peter has covered this week's great releases in his column, noting flicks like Teeth and I'm Not There. For you Hilary Swank lovers, there's some post-death love after the jump, but below is a collection of film spoofs, rather than a plain ol' film.
After Fox canceled the Seth Green-starring Greg the Bunny, it seemed like that was the end of the show. But like some other Fox victims, that wasn't the end. There was a bit of a hiatus, and then IFC jumped on board and allowed Greg to get cinematic and merge television land with movie land. The result -- a whole bunch of puppet movie spoofs. Click here to get an idea of what you'd be in for. It's not every day that you get to see a puppet embodying Frank Booth.
This release includes spoofs of movies like Monster and American Movie, plus the 2005 reunion special that takes on Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Rain Man, and more. As for guests, this batch includes Seth Green, Sarah Silverman, and Adam Goldberg.
Remember that ominous "loss" that Sarah Jessica Parker said Carrie would deal with in the new Sex and the City movie? Well, Michael Patrick King is now speaking out on the matter once rumors started to fly about just what kind of loss it was. If you don't want to know anything about this loss rumor, stop reading now!
According to The Hollywood Reporter, you won't have to worry about any big, or should I say Big demise. King says: "Kill Mr. Big? I would have been chased around the planet by women with torches." He goes on to say that the "ultimate target" of this film is to make women happy, so Big won't die because that wouldn't make them happy. But if this means then that the two break up again, since the trailer certainly seems to suggest it, talk about a tired flipping plot!
Does this mean, then, that there is no death? I don't think we really have a finite answer on that. When asked whether anyone dies: "It's a summer movie. Why would I want to kill anyone?" This could be a straightforward "no, this is a fun movie and death doesn't fit;" however, summer movies are all about wowing audiences and over-the-top fare, so someone else could still be on the chopping block.
We'll know soon enough -- the film opens on May 30.
I had a very strange weekend, especially since I'm so used to hanging around here, listening to all you folks rant and rave about Batman, Iron Man and Indiana Jones. The weekend was strange in that everyone I spoke to offline named Sex and the Cityas the film they're most looking forward to this summer. Yes, Sex and the City: The Movie! Apparently, Oprah also did a show where she let her entire audience watch SATC: The Movie, but turned it off with 20 minutes left. (I don't know about you, but if Oprah pulled that "you can't watch the ending" sh*t on me, I'd switch it over to Rachael Ray full time!)
So then I sashayed my way over to Moviefone's Summer Movies poll, which asked readers to decide on a summer film they were anticipating the most. Know what won? Yup, Sex and the City. Crazy, right? I knew this TV show had a massive fanbase, but I, personally, hadn't heard a peep out of anyone who was actually looking forward to the movie. Is it that your usual SATC fanbase doesn't hang out online, perusing through movie news sites? Maybe they're out shopping or, ya know, living actual lives ... instead of geeking out over a new Dark Knight image on Cinematical? (By all means, continue to geek out -- I'm just trying to make sense of this whole SATC thing.)
Here's another casting switch-up for you. Variety reports that not even a month after Toni Collette signed on for a role in Sam Mendes' untitled "relationship comedy,"* she's out and Maggie Pinch Hitter Gyllenhaal is in. The actress dropped the gig when delays messed up the schedule, so Maggie stepped up to the plate. First she replaces Katie Holmes, and now, Collette. Maybe she should also add: "suitable substitution for just about any actress" to her resume. My favorite Satan-worshipping makeup artist has come a long way!
The film focuses on a couple who decide to travel across the US, trying to find a perfect place to hunker down and raise their family. Collette was set to play their friend, a university professor who thinks their child will be dysfunctional no matter where they live. Variety ups the description by saying that she's a bohemian prof who is an old friend of John Krasinski's character. (Maya Rudolph is playing his wife.)
In its vagueness, it doesn't sound like the best plot I've ever heard, but I imagine that it could make for some entertaining cinema between the eye of Sam Mendes and the words of Vendela Vida and Dave Eggers. As for Gyllenhaal, I like seeing her continue to expand her diverse portfolio of roles. Production is currently under way in Connecticut.
*"Relationship comedy" keeps getting used to describe this film. Are the powers that be trying their darnedest to keep people from calling it a romcom?
The second wedding-centric "comedy" I've seen this year is the new release Made of Honor, and like the first one, Over Her Dead Body (aka That Waste of Paul Rudd That I Had to Look Up the Title For), the word "comedy" deserves to be within quotation marks when used as an adjective. It's not a terrible film, but it rarely rises above the hilarity level of Oh, How Cute. Even the cuteness wears off in the last third of the movie, leaving you with nothing but the feeling that you've seen this all before, perhaps in sitcoms, where it was much funnier.
You can predict the plot from the poster. Tom (Patrick Dempsey) and Hannah (Michelle Monaghan) are best friends who pal around New York together like pale imitations of the leads in When Harry Met Sally, except these two characters apparently never watched the second half of that film. Tom is relationship-phobic -- he has a set of strict rules for his frequent one-night stands -- but when Hannah takes a long business trip to Scotland, he starts to realize that maybe Hannah is a bigger part of his life than someone to antique-shop and eat desserts with. Naturally, when Hannah returns from Scotland, it's with a perfectly sexy, perfectly perfect fiance in tow. And in a move that is meant to be the incitement for high humor, she asks the newly lovelorn and crushed Tom to be her -- you won't believe this -- maid of honor. Have you fallen out of your chair yet, and are you rolling on the floor in hysterics?
He is not the titular Phillip Morris, however. That honor still belongs to Ewan McGregor. If you have forgotten the plot of this love caper, a married Jim Carrey is sent to prison, where he falls in love with his cellmate. When Morris is released, the infatuated Carrey escapes three times to be with him. Somewhere in the middle, though, he hooks up with Santoro.
While this is just now hitting the legitimate newswire, on Tuesday Dlisted had a photo of the happy couple. (Don't ask me what I was doing on Dlisted, I don't have an answer!) So he has already been in the film long enough to get a wardrobe -- if that counts as wardrobe.
Since this is from the team of Bad Santa, and has Leslie Mann as Carrey's dumped wife, I think there's potential even with the erratic Carrey. And I'm anxious to see McGregor in a bonafide comedy, as he was by far the best thing about Down With Love. And it is rather fitting that he's the man Carrey changes teams for -- McGregor has topped that list for most of the guys I know. I bet we'll be seeing the full monty, too.
Due to a snafu (my own fault), I did not have a seat at Tuesday night's Iron Man screening in Philadelphia. So while everybody who is anybody hereabouts was giddily watching Tony Stark transform from an arms dealer to an ass-kicking, metal-suited superhero, I was in a different theater one block away watching Patrick Dempsey be a bridesmaid in Made of Honor. There'll be a Cinematical review of the movie on Friday, but for now I'd like to ask a very specific question: what on earth could that title possibly mean?
Others who have seen the movie have referred to "Made of Honor" as "a pun," or even an "appalling pun." Okay, but a pun usually involves conflating two words or expressions that make sense in the same context and happen to sound alike. In this case, I only count one. Yes, I get it -- Dempsey plays the best friend of a woman who is getting married, and so she names him her maid of honor. It's funny because he's a guy, but he's the maid of honor. Hahaha! Fantastic. But made of honor? What, like built of honor? Who? Patrick Dempsey? I'm not connecting the dots.
The trend of successful pregnancy comedies led by Knocked Up and Juno continued as Baby Mama took top honors. Harold and Kumar took second but still managed to pull in almost $3million over its $12 million budget. Last week's other new release, Deception, fell way behind the pack and took in only $2.3 million to finish in tenth place. Here are the final numbers:
Only two new releases this week, but one of them is a doozy.
Iron Man What's It All About: At this point I doubt this film needs any introduction, but here goes. Based on the long running Marvel comic, Iron Man stars Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark, a wealthy arms manufacturer (because an impoverished arms manufacturer would just be silly). When Stark is captured and forced to build a dangerous weapon, he instead makes a high tech suit of armor and uses it to escape. He further refines the suit and uses it to stop a conspiracy that threatens the world. Why It Might Do Well: Well, we're talking one of the widest releases we've seen in awhile, a 90% fresh rating at Rottentomatoes.com, and some kickass trailers and clips that have been generating a lot of buzz. Also, we've got a lead actor with some serious star power, and a supporting cast that includes Terrence Howard, Jeff Bridges and Gwyneth Paltrow. Obviously this is next week's number one flick, the question is just how much will it rake in? Why It Might Not Do Well: If every single person involved with this film went on network television tomorrow and shot a puppy, people would still flock to this one. Number of Theaters: 3,800 Prediction: $62 million
Made of Honor What's It All About: When Tom's (Patrick Dempsey) best friend Hannah (Michelle Monaghan) leaves for a six week business trip he sees how empty his life is without her. He resolves to propose when she returns, but Hannah surprises Tom with the announcement of her engagement to someone else, and a request that he be her "maid" of honor. Why It Might Do Well: This romantic comedy is different enough from Iron Man to snap up the remainder of the audience that's not into the super hero stuff. Why It Might Not Do Well: The fact that this is the only other film being released the same weekend as what will probably be one of the biggest movies of the year seems to indicate a film the studio has little faith in. Number of Theaters: 2,700 Prediction: $14 million
This seems like the most straightforward prediction we've had in a long while, which is a sure fire sign we're heading into the Summer blockbuster season. Here's how I see things working out: 1. Iron Man 2. Made of Honor 3. Baby Mama 4. Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay 5. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Still no perfect scores this week, but our group average is up over last week. Here's how everyone did in our weekly box office prediction competition. 1. Ray: 13 1. Mario: 13 1. Brent Todd: 13 1. kevin: 13 2. Erin: 11 3. Matt: 9 3. matt: 9 3. AJ Wiley: 9 3. Chris: 9 4. cubitfox: 8 4. zach: 8 4. Mike: 6 4. Sam: 6 4. plinstrot: 6 5. Matthew: 4 5. I Eat Robots: 4 5. DarkAgair: 4 5. Aaron: 4 5. Awesomepants: 4 5. Prateek S: 4
Will the latest feature film from Marvel rule with an iron fist? Yeah, probably, but what about the rest of the top five? Join in on the fun. Post your predictions for the top five movies in the comments section below before 5:00PM Eastern Time on Friday. One point for every top five movie correctly named, two points for every correct placement, and one extra point for the top movie.
I'm going for a highly praised film this week, rather than the big buzz, but you can check out a couple of other big releases after the jump.
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly In 1996, Julian Schnabel directed Basquiat. Led by the charming and unforgettable performance of Jeffrey Wright as the famous artist, the film laid out the art world of 1980s New York City with heart, and it showcased many of today's top names. It was the straightforward film.
Now there's Golden Globe winner Le Scaphandre et le Papillon, a feature that has taken Schnabel out of the straight-forward and into a world of tragedy and eye-opening imagination. It's a move similar to David Lynch taking on The Straight Story, but switched. Instead of strange complexity to charming simplicity, it's the other way around. Diving Bell is the true story of what happened to Jean-Dominique Bauby, a man who had been the editor-in-chief of French Elle, until a sudden stroke has left him still -- only able to move one eyelid. It's like taking the thought of paralysis and upping it -- no legs, no arms, no lips. But it isn't just a sad story of despair. After being forced to adapt to his condition, he write the memoir that becomes this film, all with the simple, blinking eye.
Can you believe it's almost May? Another month of 2008 is almost over, and we've got more casting news, courtesy of Variety:
New York, I Love You already has a flipping huge and intrigue-inducing cast that ranges from Ethan Hawke to Julie Christie. Now we've got two more players in the mix. Both Carla Gugino (Sin City) and Goran Visnjic (Elektra) have signed on for a segment directed by Andrei Zvyagintsev. There's no word on what this segment will focus on, but I'll go out on a limb and say it'll feature some sort of love in New York City.
Then there's a young actress by the name of Emilie De Ravin. If you're one of those Lost fiends out there, she's Claire Littleton in the series. On the big screen side of things, she had a lead gig in The Hills Have Eyes. But now she gets to deal with some Public Enemies. While enemies usually aren't a desirable sort of group to hang with, this melange has Johnny Depp, Christian Bale, Channing Tatum, Billy Crudup, Giovanni Ribisi, Stephen Dorff, Rory Cochrane, David Wenham ... basically, a ton of great actors, plus a bunch of beloved indie boys from the '90s. According to IMDb, she'll play Anna Patzke.
Finally, there's the girl who made the world of Gossip Girl all the more intriguing -- Ms. Serena van der Woodsen herself, Blake Lively. She's picked up a lead role in the upcoming film The Private Lives of Pippa Lee, which stars Keanu Reeves and Winona Ryder. There's no word on who she will play in the feature.
The vampire movie has been pretty much done to "death" by this point, right? Even the good vampire flicks are sort of treading over familiar ground, yes? Longtime fans of the undead bloodsuckers have more or less accepted that the sub-genre has become a fairly anemic wasteland, true? Normally I'd have to reluctantly agree with those assertions, but fortunately I caught a really excellent Swedish film this morning called Let the Right One In. Not only does this fantastic little import add a lot of new color to the "vampire flick," but it also turns out to be one of the strangest, stickiest, and (yes) sweetest horror movies I've seen in ten years.
Oskar is a lonely 12-year-old Swedish kid who gets picked on by bullies at school, but when a strange new girl moves in to the apartment next door, the pre-teens strike up a warm little friendship. Ah, there's one big problem though: Newcomer Eli (pronounced Ellie) only looks like a 12-year-old girl, when in fact she's a vampire of indeterminate age. Eli lives with what horror fans know as a "familiar," a guy who will go out and get his charge some plasma when it's needed -- which of course is pretty often. Eli does all she can to keep her vampirism a secret from her new boyfriend, but the closer they get -- the stickier things become. (And while there's just a bit more to the plot, I'm ending my synopsis right there. Wouldn't want to chance spoiling anything.)
I really like Tilda Swinton, and I think she's a great actress. That being said, I think that her Oscar win this year was just a little silly. While it was, by no means, a bad performance, it didn't seem like the sort that would ever be considered the best there was last year, especially over Amy Ryan or even Cate's Bob Dylan. Was the win due to Tilda getting all pit-sweaty? Whatever the case, I'd like to see her acting chops praised for a wow performance rather than a normal good one. She has a whole ton of projects on the way, and has just added another, so maybe it will be one of these.
Variety reports that Swinton will once again team up with Italian director Luca Guadagnino (The Protagonists) to star in his new romantic drama, I Am Love (lo sono l'amore). She will play "a foreign society matron in Milan who falls for a young chef," and Variety says the film focuses on "the irreparable consequences brought about by love in a high-bourgeois family." Italian actress Alba Rohrwacher also has a role, but the rest of the cast hasn't been set yet.
I imagine this will be mostly romance with a wee little bit of food while the chef is at work, but the foodie in me hopes that we can get a good dose of Italian delicacies to feast on as well.
Remember those lines in your high school yearbook that claimed so and so was most likely to do such and such? You know, like most likely to succeed, most likely to be famous, most likely to be the target of a senatorial investigation. That's the angle were going with today as we look at five recent trailers with an eye for what they're most likely to accomplish.
The Spirit This one is the movie most likely to have people saying "who the hell is The Spirit." This is a character with a long and illustrious history in the world of comics (check out his Wikipedia entry for the full story) who was created by one of the acknowledged masters of the form, but outside of the comics niche, most people have never heard of him. To the best of my knowledge, the only time the character appeared in another medium was when Sam Jones of Flash Gordon fame played the him in a failed TV pilot in 1987. This film version is directed by Frank Miller and his Sin City style is very much in evidence. I like the look, and I like the fact that Miller has The Spirit leaping off the title logo as he often did in the comics. Here's what Elisabeth thought of it.
Sea of Dust This is the film most likely to give people Grindhouse flashbacks, as long as you see the version of the trailer that's up on Youtube or the one at upcominghorrormovies.com. The preview has the intentionally worn and scratched look consistent with what Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino did with Grindhouse. Not exactly an original idea, but it looks cool and it certainly got my attention. Oddly, the version shown on the film's official site doesn't have the weathered look. This period horror flick is an homage to both the classic Hammer horror films and the works of Italian scare maestro Mario Bava (there's a scene with a dank dungeon hallway lit with multi-colored lights that's pure Bava). The film stars Tom Savini as the villainous Prester John whose evil threatens the residents of a small village, with Hammer films alumnus Ingrid Pitt (The Vampire Lovers, Countess Dracula) also starring. I'm still a bit hazy on the plot even after reading the synopsis at the official site, but I love Hammer and Bava, so I have to see this one.
Just last month, we heard about a contest where one lucky couple would have the honor of being married at the premiere of Made of Honor. Well, that lucky couple has been picked, and you can see their smiling faces over to the right. Michelle Golightly and Shaun Bollinger of Camp Hill, Pennsylvania are going to get hitched in a super-fancy Monday wedding in the Big Apple on April 28, right at the premiere of the film.
It might seem like a weird idea, but think about it -- these guys get to have top-of-the-line professionals put together their day, and it won't break their wallets or bring on the usual, insane piles of debt! They get a first-class, all-expenses-paid trip to Manhattan, where super talented wedding people style them up, get them dressed, take their pictures, get their rings, make their cake, and do everything else that a wedding requires. And to top all that off -- Mary Hart from Entertainment Tonight is going to be the officiant -- it's so weird that I actually love the idea.
If you want to see this wildness for yourself, you can check out the webcast on Crackle.com, footage after the fact on ET the next night, or if you find yourself in the neighborhood, there's street space for people who want to check out the wedding and premiere -- it's all going down at the Ziegfeld on 54th.
I'm a big fan of original weddings that go at least slightly against the grain, so this whole scenario sounds like a hoot. But I wonder: what's the strangest, wackiest, or most original wedding you've ever witnessed, or been in? Share your stories below.
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Here's another casting switch-up for you. 
I saw into the casting future, and it was through Dlisted. 
Due to a snafu (my own fault), I did not have a seat at Tuesday night's Iron Man screening in Philadelphia. So while everybody who is anybody hereabouts was giddily watching Tony Stark transform from an arms dealer to an ass-kicking, metal-suited superhero, I was in a different theater one block away watching 
Iron Man
Made of Honor
Can you believe it's almost May? Another month of 2008 is almost over, and we've got more casting news, courtesy of Variety:
I really like 
Just last month, 
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Full 'G.I. Joe' Cast Photos!
