Scarlett Johansson »

Poor Scarlett Johansson. The Guardian's Joe Queenan has a piece up slamming the actress with gems such as, "Basically, her acting repertory consists of staring intently at the person she is speaking to, keeping her lips spread apart, and hoping no one will notice that she is no threat to Meryl Streep, and not all that much of a threat to Hilary Duff ." When you're being compared unfavorably to Hilary Duff -- that's gotta hurt.

Queenan goes on to enumerate Johansson's string of box office (and acting) failures, including in that list her BAFTA and Golden Globe-nommed performance in The Girl With the Pearl Earring ("listless and vacant"), The Island ("hopelessly miscast"), Match Point ("passive and useless"), Scoop ("thoroughly implausible"), The Black Dahlia ("ridiculously out of her league"), and The Prestige ("entirely extraneous"). Harsh words, but does Queenan have a point?

On this edition of Movie Pics, Angelina Jolie suits up as Mariane Pearl, Matt Damon returns as Jason Bourne and -- whaddya know -- a Christopher Nolan-related story that doesn't have to do with Batman. There's a first. Check it out:

• While it's not much, USA Today published the first photo of Angelina Jolie as Mariane Pearl in A Mighty Heart, now filming in Pune, India. In the pic (which is based off Mariane's 2003 book A Mighty Heart: The Brave Life and Death of My Husband Danny Pearl), Jolie stars as the widow of Daniel Pearl, a journalist for the Wall Street Journal who was kidnapped and later murdered by terrorists in Pakistan four years ago.
• The first pics from the set of The Bourne Ultimatum have hit the net and, while the film still does not (officially) have its villain, they're wasting no time filming what appears to be a slew of scenes involving Matt Damon and Julia Stiles. If you're at all interested in 10 photos of Damon on a moped, then these should be right up your alley.
• Finally, Coming Soon has a set of tantalizing photos from The Prestige, Christopher Nolan's upcoming film due out October 20. Starring Christian Bale, Hugh Jackman and Scarlett Johansson (who, honestly, would have been so much better than Katie Holmes in Batman Begins), pic revolves around two rival magicians obsessed with one-upping the other with a series of dangerous and deadly tricks. As our own Jeffrey M. Anderson noted, The Prestige "sounds like it will be the movie The Illusionist should have been."

Scarlett Johansson, who poses scantily clad in the November issue of Esquire magazine, which bestowed upon her the prestigious dubious title of Sexiest Woman Alive, at least had the intelligence to question the merit of the title, saying "What about my brain? What about my heart? What about my kidneys and my gallbladder?" My point exactly, Scarlett, but the problem is that your words carry a tad less weight after you've just done a photo spread in which you play an "enigmatic trailer-park temptress." WTF? I didn't even know there was a subset of sexual fetishists devoted to lusting after "trailer park temptresses," much less that that target market reads Esquire. Who knew?

The thing is, although I like Johansson, and she's turned in some decent performances (I actually liked her best so far in Match Point, where she got to display more than one emotion), I think she still has a lot of room to grow as an actress. And, not that she has to go the route of playing ugly people ala Charlize Theron in order to be taken seriously, but there has to be some middle ground she can find that allows her to be an intelligent young woman who is taken seriously, and cast in smart roles that don't focus on her "sexy" factor. Somehow, though, I don't think the path to those roles (and more Oscar noms) lies along "Trailer Park Temptress" Highway. If you want us to admire you for your gallbladder, Scarlett, keep your clothes on and leave something to the imagination.

Most of the celebrity gossip news this week seems to be centered on Anna Nicole Smith. In fact, the quantity of news about her pushed the Cruise family right out of the spotlight for once. Her son's recent death was determined to have resulted from a toxic drug combination. Disputes have been occurring over the paternity of her new baby daughter. And on Thursday, she and her longtime lawyer, Howard K. Stern, held a commitment ceremony (not an official marriage, as was earlier speculated).

After the Smith drama, do we need any more gossip? Of course we do. Here are some of the celebrity highlights from the past week:

• Wedding bells: Rumors have been flying about actress Amanda Peet (pictured above) being pregnant. She not only confirmed the news of her pregnancy this week, but also announced that she and the baby's father, screenwriter David Benioff, are getting married this weekend.

Someone get this gal a Delorean, because Scarlett Johannson has been doing a lot of time traveling lately. In Michael Bay's flop, The Island, she was trapped in a frightening vision of the future, but lately she's been dipping into the past with increasing regularity ever since Girl with a Pearl Earring.

She can currently be seen in the 1940s era The Black Dahlia, and will also appear in Christopher Nolan's turn of the century magic thriller, The Prestige. After that she has lined up The Other Boleyn Girl (1500s), Napoleon and Betsy (1800s) and now Mary, Queen of Scots (back to the 1500s), in which the gal will take on the role of Queen Mary of Scotland.

While we support Scarlett's love of the historical pieces, can we please see her out of a hoop skirt and in a t-shirt and jeans sometime soon?

Here's a quick casting round up from the past few days:

• Tilda Swinton is close to watching Brad Pitt age backwards, as she's in negotiations to star alongside the Hot One in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Based on a story from F. Scott Fitzgerald and directed by David Fincher (who we're hoping learned a lesson from the dismal Panic Room and will get himself back on track), pic also stars Cate Blanchett and revolves around a man who, at age 50, suddenly begins to get younger and younger.
• Kristin Scott Thomas will play Lady Elizabeth, the mother of Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman in The Other Boleyn Girl, based on the novel by Philippa Gregory. Eric Bana is set to become the envy of every male in the world, as he will play the role of King Henry VIII, the man with whom Johansson and Portman both fight over. Bastard!
• James Caviezel (aka Jesus Christ Superstar) is in talks for the lead role in Outlander, The Weinstein Co.'s epic sci-fi flick. Directed by Howard McCain (off a script he co-wrote with Dirk Blackman), pic tells of a human-like alien who accidentally winds up on Earth in 509 AD and sets loose some horrific creature that he subsequently must destroy. The one question on his mind: What would Jesus do?
• Comedian Carlos Mencia has hopped on the Farrelly Brothers bandwagon, taking a part in their upcoming comedy, Seven Day Itch. Mencia will join Ben Stiller. who plays a man that, while on his honeymoon, accidentally falls in love with another woman. Co-starring in the flick are Michelle Monaghan and Malin Akerman. I'd expect Mencia to play some wacky guy Stiller meets (and subsequently looks for advice from) while on his trip.

Nearly every day there is a story circulating the web about an actor or actress being "talked about" or "in discussions" or "offered" a role in a film that itself is not even a sure thing. Today's has to do with Scarlett Johansson, as she's considered to be "in the lead" to play Natascha Kampusch, an 18-year-old Austrian girl who last month escaped her kidnapper after 8 years of imprisonment. The main source is UK's Digital Spy (I got it via Hollywood Wiretap who got it via Dark Horizons, to show you how these stories get passed along) who say that despite no studio claiming the story, "movie bosses" are favoring Johansson for the role because she has the same hair and eye color (it has nothing to do with their fantasy of tying Johansson up in a basement).

Honestly, I don't see her in the role. For one thing, there isn't much likelihood in the story making its way onto the big screen, as it is obviously made-for-TV material. For another thing, Johansson just isn't ready for the suffering dramatic role of this sort. Unless a great script was written and a great director became interested, Johansson could be interested as the role might have Oscar potential, but I highly doubt that combination of events is possible here.

Brian De Palma arrives in the final third of 2006 with one of his best films, and yet no one will realize it for years to come. De Palma's work is routinely ignored and undervalued for the very simple reason that he makes cinema. He hasn't shown much interest in making socially significant films; he probably won't make a To Kill a Mockingbird or a Hotel Rwanda anytime soon. And he's not much interested in adapting Henry James or E.M. Forster for the big screen. As a result, he is often seen as inferior. He never reaches beyond cinema into other realms; he only makes movies.

Thirteen years later, many see Carlito's Way as arguably De Palma's greatest achievement. (The film critics at Cahiers du Cinema selected it as the best movie of the 1990s.) And yet in the thick of 1993, no one cared. Schindler's List, The Piano and The Age of Innocence were the rage. And it's noteworthy to remember that, as beloved as his Scarface is today, De Palma received a 1983 Razzie nomination for his trouble (he has received five in all).

In a display of negativity that we here at Cinematical can't help but applaud, the people at Fametracker (AKA the brilliant minds who came up with The JT Walsh Awards years before we did) have put together a list of their 10 least-anticipated films for the fall. It's a tight race for the top -- so tight, in fact, that The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause can only reach as high as 6.5 -- but in the end it's a star-free, violent epic in a dead language that beats out even Rocky Balboa for first place. Yes, that's right: For what is sure to be the only time, Apocalypto is number one.

Go check out the list and see which film you're most pissed off to see there, and what you think they left off. Me, I'm having a hard time not getting a little annoyed about the inclusion of The Black Dahlia, despite the admittedly troubling fact that it's resting on the mildly unreliable (albeit pretty) backs of Josh Hartnett and Scarlett Johansson.

[via Pop Candy]

When we hear anything about Penelope Spheeris' Janis Joplin biopic Gospel According to Janis, it's always about the casting of the central role. Last year, the rumor was that Renee Zellweger had actually been offered the part, but (much to Karina's glee) wasn't sure about taking it (she didn't). Then came a parade of girl-names, from Courtney Love and Brittany Murphy to Lindsay Lohan, Pink and Scarlett Johansson (who I'm pretty sure is suggested to studio heads for any female role these days, just because the mere mention of her name makes them drool).

Also in the most recent list of actresses allegedly seen by Spheeris was Zooey Deschanel, the pint-sized, singing actress who for some reason has all even slightly geeky boys eating out of the palm of her hand. Well, boys, it's possibly time to rejoice: The UK's Popbitch (an email newsletter) claims that Deschanel has officially won the part. Whether it's true or not remains to be seen -- it is a fact, however, that she's currently playing Liza Minnielli in Simply Halston, which in and of itself is pretty awesome. I just may be warming up to this Zooey character.

[via Film Stalker]