By now, you no doubt know the storyline of Jerry Seinfeld's Bee Movie, which opened theatrically last November and released this week on DVD. Seinfeld co-wrote, produced and stars in the film as Barry B. Benson, newly graduated from bee college and pondering his future.

Dissatisfied with his singular career prospect -- making honey -- Barry decides to explore life outside the hive, gets distracted by all the pretty colors in the world, meets Vanessa (Renee Zellweger), a florist, finds out that humans have been stealing the bees' honey, and decides to sue the human race. That's basically the story in a ... beehive .

Welcome all to another unbelievable edition of Insert Caption (as seen on the widely popular Cinematical.com)! Last week, we asked you folks to put on your best Jerry Seinfeld impersonation for an image from the comedian's animated flick Bee Movie (now out on DVD). While we got a lot of captions with the words 'honey' and 'what's the deal with ..., ' I don't believe we received any that went something like, "What's the deal with honey?" Yeah ... so what's the deal with that? Congrats to David L. for providing us with a winning caption ... about nothing.

1. "It's not so much that he talks, dear, but that he's actually talking about NOTHING!" -- David L.

2. "Yes, I get it dear, "Bee Mine." But this, this is my freakin' Valentine's Day
gift???" -- Eric S.

3. "I'm sorry sweetie, were you talking? I was just thinking about my enormous chin." -- Eric A.

See full image and all captions

This week we have something very cool (and healthy!) in store for you. Not only will you get to take home a copy of the brand spanking new Atonement DVD (out March 18), but one lucky winner will also ride away with super cool his and hers beach cruisers (as pictured below -- click to enlarge)! With only a few months before summer hits, why not make it so you'll be hittin' the beach in style. Check 'em out folks ...

... now all you have to do is give us your most wittiest caption for the photo below from the hit Oscar-winning movie Atonement, starring the very lovely Keira Knightley and equally as lovely James McAvoy (guys can be lovely if they have an accent, right?). Remember, Atonement hits DVD on March 18. Now sound off below ...

Read the official rules for this contest

As my wife said, it's just not the Oscars if there's nothing to complain about. However, I was impressed that two of the year's toughest films, Paul Thomas Anderson's There Will Be Blood (389 screens) and Joel and Ethan Coen's No Country for Old Men took the most nominations. Typically, the Academy is attracted to much less challenging and easy-to-categorize films (like Atonement). Both films are fairly bleak in their vision, but I suspect There Will Be Blood will sneak out ahead for two reasons: it's an epic, and epics almost always win. And, to quote a character from Sunset Boulevard, it "says a little something" about the current sociopolitical climate.

One of the biggest controversies cropped up over the foreign film category, which came up with five nominations that no one has ever heard of. (The Counterfeiters opens sometime next month and Mongol opens in June.) Not to mention that they ignored top contenders like 4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days (opening this week) and Persepolis (30 screens). Thankfully the outrage has begun discussions on changing the stupid, ancient rules for the category. Currently these rules require each country to submit one film, and multi-national films, such as The Diving Bell and the Butterfly (107 screens), to be disqualified. A small group of "specialists," rather than the Academy as a whole, votes on the small list of films. The documentary category was less obscure, and although I saw 19 documentaries in 2007, I only managed to see two of the five nominees, No End in Sight and Sicko. I have an Academy screener for Operation Homecoming that I hope to catch soon, and Taxi to the Dark Side (1 screen) is screening for Bay Area press next week.

In the winter of 1990, audiences had all kinds of acclaimed, or at least halfway decent, movies to choose from. Yet when all the smoke cleared, it was Home Alone that had captured the box office. What's more, it kept on capturing the box office, for months. The wags of the time wrote hundreds of column inches trying to figure out why such an obviously horrible movie had caught the public's fancy. Perhaps it was because of the Gulf War, the columns guessed, and people wanted pure escapism. (A scene in Kevin Smith's Dogma suggested that its success was a result of a deal with the devil.) The most likely excuse, however, is the fact that the kids were home from school and it was the only family-friendly movie playing at the time. The Godfather Part III opening on Christmas Day may have seemed like a big event to most movie buffs, but not to an eight year-old.

This phenomenon has more or less repeated itself year after year. We critics tend to shrug off movies like Night at the Museum, National Treasure: Book of Secrets and Alvin and the Chipmunks while we're busy devouring the high-protein items that will make our ten-best lists. Excepting those three examples, two of which are still doing boffo box office and the third of which is in DVD oblivion, I thought it might be fun to evaluate some of the current below-400-screen family movies and consider their fates. Mainly, I wanted to concentrate on the differences between Fred Claus (240 screens) and Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium (248 screens). Mr. Magorium has a devastating 34% on Rotten Tomatoes and a 48% on Metacritic, while Fred Claus is even lower with a 23% on RT and 42% on Metacritic. But Fred Claus has outgrossed Mr. Magorium more than twice over, earning $71 million to Mr. Magorium's $31 million.

I do love a good trailer. I'm one of those people who gets to the theater in plenty of time for the previews, and if I see a movie that has one or fewer trailers playing with it I feel gypped. It's as much part of the experience as overpriced popcorn and ill-timed cell phone usage. Man, did I see a lot of trailers this year. 2007 was my first full year of doing the Trailer Park feature here on Cinematical and the experience has strengthened my appreciation for the form. I'm not placing these in any particular order, but here are ten trailers that really got my attention this year. Some of the movies I've seen, some I haven't, some have yet to be released, but all (in my humble opinion) do an exceptional job of selling the film. My choices, of course, are purely subjective and will undoubtedly conflict with yours, so please add a comment and let us know what your favorite trailers of 2007 were.


Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (teaser)
This one may have dropped in late 2006, but I''m including it here for two reasons: I mentioned it in a Trailer Park last January and it kicked serious ass. Sure, the full length trailer had a little more meat on its bones, but it's the teaser trailer for the Fantastic Four sequel that had people talking, myself included. The wedding of Mr. Fantastic to The Invisible Woman (a pivotal moment from the early Lee and Kirby issues of the Fantastic Four comic) is interrupted by the arrival of The Silver Surfer. The Human Torch gives chase across the skies and through the tunnels of New York. One of the first movie's biggest problems was that the Torch wasn't able to fully exercise his powers until near the end of the film, but this time we get it up front in the trailer.

Cloverfield (teaser)
No one knew what to expect when this trailer showed up with Transformers last summer, but it has since inspired all kinds of speculation as to what this movie is all about. A hand-held home video of a farewell party in New York City is interrupted by a power failure. A massive roar can be heard off in the distance and a gigantic fireball engulfs a large chunk of the city. Huge pieces of shrapnel fly everywhere, including a large chunk of metal that turns out to be the Statue of Liberty's head. This is one of those trailers that is so good you find yourself saying, "the hell with that movie I just paid to see, I want to see this one right now." To further tantalize audiences, producer J.J. Abrams and company didn't even tell anyone what the title was at first. The full length trailer that followed added more footage, but failed to be as engaging as the original teaser.

In what seems like a repeat of last year, the 2008 Annie Award nominations include a Pixar movie and a movie about penguins. The top contenders for the 2007 Annies, which recognize the best in animation, were Cars and Happy Feet. The former ended up winning the big award, Best Animated Feature. However, a couple weeks later it was Happy Feet that won the corresponding Oscar, so the Annies can not be looked at to predict the Academy's decision. In 2008, though, the two awards should actually match. The only real contender for both the Annie and the Oscar is Pixar's Ratatouille. There isn't much chance of this year's penguin movie, Surf's Up, winning either award. If there's any minor competition for Pixar, it's from Persepolis. The other two nominees for the Best Animated Feature Annie are Bee Movie and The Simpsons Movie.

Ratatouille was the leader in nominations at 13, while Surf's Up received the second highest amount with 10. In addition to the top award, the two films are competing in the categories for writing (also competing: Simpsons and Persepolis), storyboarding (also competing: TMNT; Meet the Robinsons; Bee Movie), production design (also competing: Beowulf), directing (also competing: Shrek the Third; Simpsons; Persepolis), character design (no other competitors), character animation (no other competitors, but Surf's Up received two mentions here) and animated effects (also competing: Spider-Man 3; Disney short How to Hook Up Your Home Theater; Ratatouille received two mentions here). One category that Bee Movie seriously missed is voice acting, which features three nominations for Ratatouille -- for Janeane Garofalo, Ian Holm and Patton Oswalt.

One thing that is interesting about the Annies is how the awards can be distributed to many different movies. Last year, Over the Hedge won the directing, storyboarding and character design categories, Flushed Away won in writing, voice acting, animated effects, character animation and production design categories and Happy Feet took away no awards. Then again, the year before, Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit picked up ten trophies and then went on to pick up the Academy Award. So, the 2008 Annies could go any number of ways.

Welcome to the Thanksgiving edition of The Write Stuff!

Thanksgiving is always rough on a screenwriter. You're usually seeing a lot of friends and family, and while they (candied) yammer on about their accomplishments, you have to start all of your sentences with: "We're still waiting to hear on that one..." and "Our agent says we're really close..." and "Grandma, let me explain the WGA strike to you one more time..."

But there is a great deal to be thankful for this year. On Monday, still happy and groggy from a weekend of gorging, representatives from the WGA and the AMPTP will resume talks. Ideally, each side will come away happy and we can end this strike. From a personal note, my writing career was right on the verge of kicking into high gear when the strike was announced, and I certainly don't want to lose that upward momentum. And looking at the bigger picture, we're a month away from Christmas here. Who wants to see not just writers but everyone who works in and around the entertainment industry desperately struggling to pay the bills? The grips, the gaffers, the assistants, the dry cleaners...these people are out of work, too.

So send your good vibes to the negotiating table on Monday. And if you think there's nothing you can do, you're wrong. You can electronically sign this petition to the AMPTP, which starts: "We, the undersigned, fully support the strike of the Writers Guild of America, and agree with the WGA's stated goals of obtaining just and fair compensation regarding revenues generated through "new media". The petition currently has 57, 695 signatures, which is extremely impressive. Won't you add yours?

There's lots of Shrek movies on the way. Shrek Works 9 to 5. Shrek and Leonard Part 6. Shrek and the Seven Deadly Sins. Shrek and the 8 Wonders of the World. Shrek Travels to the Nine Planets. However, before he can do all that, he's got to get out there, so get ready to see Shrek Goes Fourth. Get it? As Jeffrey Katzenberg told Moviehole: "Shrek goes out into the world, forth! A little play on words." Okay, so while number 4 is a reality straight from Katz himself, I made the others up. That being said, I wouldn't be surprised if we just continue to get these films -- even though the last didn't seem to get the reaction love of the first two, it still pulled in many hundreds of millions of dollars.

So, why stop? Mike Myers has no interest in slowing the speed of Shrek, and the entire cast is still signed on for both 4 and 5. So, Dreamworks is working on the next one, and it will come out in 2010 in 3D -- because everything from these guys will be in 3D starting in 2009. I like 3D and all, but I have to say that I'm not entirely excited about this idea considering how crappy it can be if you're not in a good seat. That, and they had to go and make the glasses look less spastic, which dashed my dreams of theaters and streets full of Dr. Jacobis. But anyway, Moviehole also asked Katzenburg about the possibility of a Bee Movie franchise. Katz says: "I don't have the the courage to ask him [Seinfeld] right now. [laughs]" I imagine that will depend on how the movie continues to do. After two weeks, it's raked in $104,572,318 worldwide, so it is still working its way up to its production budget of $150 mil.

Once again, Film Threat has released its annual list of the Coldest People in Hollywood -- the ones whose careers are in the most trouble according to them. Strangely, the actress I would have thought was the natural contender for #1, Nicole Kidman, only makes #6. Of course, if The Golden Compass is a huge hit, it'll reverse a string of box-office misfortunes. Film Threat's advise is for Kidman to seek a job on George Miller's projected Mad Max 4. Hilary Swank, star of a robust contender for worst of '07, is advised to choose her work with more care ("She may have grown up eating sawdust in Gooberville, Washington, or wherever, but it's no longer necessary to accept every script that comes her way"). And there's no arguments here with choices Eli Roth (#8), scandal plagued actress Vanessa Hudgens (above), and Jennifer Lopez ("there doesn't seem to be any measure that can stop her from making more bad movies."). Certainly, Natalie Portman (#41) deserves a remembrance for her dual role in Goya's Ghosts, not even mentioned in the citation.

Naturally, this list offers more bones to pick than a washtub-sized bucket of KFC. Jessicas Alba and Biel share #12 (hey, Jessica Biel can act, you ruffians!); Eddie Murphy (#16) who is still quite A-list, is derided for Norbit, a popular hit that had a few defenders. Quentin Tarantino (#22) is hardly out of the game, despite the mixed feelings people had about Death Proof, and Ray Liotta (#29) has a wicked cameo in a Top Five movie right now. Lindsay Lohan charts at #51 on a list of 50. Guys, where was Eddie Izzard on this list: Across the Universe and Romance and Cigarettes within months of each other! Film Threat's number 1 pick isn't even an actor, though I doubt if anyone feels like returning his phone calls right now. In the meantime, bad-film fans can wait breathlessly for the Golden Raspberry awards coming up later this year.

I think we all know that Ratatouille will win the 2008 Oscar for Best Animated Feature. So, do we really need to waste time nominating others? Yesterday, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences named 12 movies eligible for the award, a shortlist that will eventually be pared down to three finalists when the Oscar nominees are announced in January. Had there been at least 16 eligible animated films this year, the number of nominees would be five, but with only 12, the category will only see three contenders. What could they be? Certainly Ratatouille will be one of them, and it's my guess that Persepolis and Surf's Up (the Academy loves penguins) will be the ones to join the Disney/Pixar sure-thing. I'm on the fence about Beowulf, especially after reading Scott's praise this morning, but I think it has a good chance of eventually being disqualified from being nominated. There's some debate already about whether or not it is technically an animated film. Another movie I have doubts about is Alvin and the Chipmunks, which seems to be primarily live-action. Last year, Arthur and the Invisibles ended up out of the race due to its own matter of having too much live footage.

The full list of animated features: Ratatouille; Persepolis; Shrek the Third, which should be the first of its series to not get a nomination; The Simpsons Movie, which the Academy should deem too television for its award; Bee Movie, which would only get a nomination if the Academy needed Seinfeld to attend the ceremony -- and hopefully it doesn't; TMNT (aka Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles); Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters; Alvin and the Chipmunks; Beowulf; Meet the Robinsons; Surf's Up; and Tekkonkinkreet, a Japanese film by American director Michael Arias, which could be a dark horse if Persepolis wasn't the favorite for the necessary foreign animated selection. I'm not sure why Happily N'Ever After was excluded, but I guess it wouldn't have a chance anyway. What do you think should win, or at least make the nomination round?