Charles Band Tagged Articles at Cinematical

Romania is still an inexpensive place to film a horror movie (just ask Charles Band, Elvira or Bruce Campbell), as well as place to stage more prestigious work; it has doubled for the Appalachians in Cold Mountain, and for India in the upcoming Youth Without Youth by Francis Ford Coppola. Their native film industry is far less known in the US. According to the Pacific Film Archives' Jason Sanders, Romania only makes six films a year. They're doing something right, or at least the Cannes Film Festival thinks so: Romanian films have won two Un Certain Regard awards, one Camera d'Or, and one Palme d'Or in the last three years.

At the Archives at UC Berkeley -- relatively central to the seven million residents of the San Francisco Bay Area -- the PFA is assembling a six-night program of Romanian films. If they have anything in common, it's telling about the trauma of the almost science-fiction evil of the Ceausescu dictatorship, and the tale of his hideo-comic downfall on Dec 22, 1989. The Paper Will Be Blue by Radu Muntean (Dec 2) stages the fear and excitement of the revolution in Romania as an urbane thriller; the Scorsese/Wim Wenders executive-produced The Way I Spent the End of the World (above) by Catalin Mitulescu (Nov 3) takes a more impressionistic, nostalgic approach.

Also making its California debut on Nov. 3 is California Dreamin' (Endless). It isn't called Endless because of a 155 minute running time, but rather because the director Cristian Nemescu died before the final edit. Armand Assante, recently the best part of American Gangster, if you ask me, plays a NATO Army Captain immobilized in a one-horse town by bureaucrats and hustlers. The Great Communist Bank Robbery (2004, Nov 25) concerns a really memorable Communist atrocity. After a 1959 bank robbery, the six who were arrested (guilty or not) were made to act in a reenactment film designed to show the Romanians that crime didn't pay; they were executed afterwards. Director Alexandru Solomon investigates this lost bit of history. Occident (Nov 17) is the first film by director Cristian Mungiu, whose still unreleased in our area 4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days copped the Palme D'Or at Cannes 2007. And a series of short films on Nov 25 includes early work by Cristi Puiu (The Death of Mr. Lazarescu, a Cannes winner in '05), and Corneliu Porumboiu (12:08 East of Bucharest, Camera d'Or winner 2006). Pretty soon you'll be able to have a quick answer to the question, "What's your favorite Romanian film?"

A few months back I caught wind of Charles Band's next inevitable dungpile movie, and something about the concept, cast and cover art just made me giggle. I chuckled partially because I think the idea of a murderous bong is pretty moronically hilarious, but mainly because I know that Charles Band couldn't direct fecal matter to be malodorous if his life depended on it.

Oh sure, Mr. Band churned out a bunch of fairly entertaining ultra-schlock a few decades ago, but if his latest productions are any indication, the guy's not even trying anymore. All Band seems to need is a silly title, a stupid concept and some colorful DVD cases, and Boom! he's moving on to the next project. (Those who think I'm being a bit harsh need to sit through a triple feature of Decadent Evil, Doll Graveyard and The Gingerdead Man and then get back to me.) Even those who have a huge soft spot for cheapo horror (like, um, me) will find very little to enjoy over the course of that 3+ hour triple feature. (Yeah, Band's movies are that short.)

So now comes Charles Band's next attempt at cult classic-dom, and it's a Tommy Chong-led horror-comedy called, yes, Evil Bong. The DVD doesn't hit until October 10th, but there's a wacky new trailer to check out, just in case you were wondering how silly this concept will actually look onscreen. Hoo boy. (Yes, I'll see the damn thing, and yes, I'll still give it a fair shake, but c'mon ... EVIL BONG??)

After the jump ... a poem.

Sometimes you hear about the plot of a new movie and you think, "Damn, why didn't I come up with such a simple concept?" -- while other times you find yourself wondering "Who the hell would make a movie THIS stupid?" Both of those thoughts careened through my brain when I saw the cover for Charles Band's next flick, the inevtiably awful but hilariously stupid-looking Evil Bong. Yes, that's right: Someone finally got the smart idea to make a horror movie called Evil Bong.

If the name Charles Band sounds familiar, then you're probably a serious movie geek who's also the same approximate age as yours truly. As manager of Empire Pictures / Full Moon, Band littered the '80s & '90s with low-rent fun-trash such as Troll, TerrorVision, Ghoulies, and the endless parade of Puppet Master sequels. These days Chuck is running an outfit that delivers titles like Doll Graveyard, The Gingerdead Man, and ... yes, Evil Bong -- which stars Tim Thomerson, Bill Moseley, and (of course) good ol' Tommy Chong.

I've got a perfect tagline for the flick: "Evil Bong! It'll make you hungry ... for a good movie."