DavidNiven Tagged Articles at Cinematical

There have been countless debates about which James Bond is best, and as we saw from Kevin's post last November, the fans are all in disagreement. But those who side with Sean Connery can now celebrate a scientifically conclusive victory over the others, since a computer has apparently proved that the first Bond was the true Bond. Two U.K. psychologists -- one based in Scotland and one based in England, in case you think there's regional bias -- produced a composite image using a prototyping technique on a computer, and of all the Bond actors the image most resembles Connery.

The funny thing is, according to their procedure, the psychologists' proof is incorrect. Maybe they should have stressed that Connery is the closest thing to a real Bond ever portrayed in an official 007 film, because the real movie Bond would have to be David Niven, who plays the character in the parodic adaptation Casino Royale (the 1967 one). See, the composite image was made by feeding the computer pictures of other actors who Bond author Ian Fleming had said in 1961 had a facial structure similar to what he imagined for the character. Those actors were Stewart Granger, Richard Burton, Patrick McGoohan, James Mason, Rex Harrison, Cary Grant and, yes, David Niven. Considering the fact that McGoohan is still alive, there is still time for a tie, but I'll go ahead and crown Niven with the honor despite what a computer tells me. Either way, though, one important thing the composite seemed to indicate is that Daniel Craig is the furthest of all from being the true Bond.

Ellen DeGeneres takes the stage on February 25 as host of the 79th Academy Awards ceremony -- and if she thinks hosting the Oscars is as easy as showing up and tossing off a few one-liners, she's got another think coming. Luckily, she can learn tons from those who came before her, from revered hosts like Johnny Carson and Billy Crystal to unfortunately maligned hosts like David Letterman and Chris Rock.

Take a look at our advice to Ellen, based on the best and worst moments in Oscar host history, and then help her out with your own pearls of wisdom.

CHECK IT OUT: Do's and Don'ts for Ellen DeGeneres

POST: What advice would you give Ellen?

POST: What are the best and worst moments in Oscar host history?

I hope to God that some of you are old enough to remember the glory days of SNL, back when it was funny, and Steve Martin was both a wild and crazy guy and the funkiest Tut the world has ever known. If you are, you'll understand why, when I read the news this morning that Paramount is planning to make a movie about King Tut (different from Roland Emmerich's King Tut, which seems to have stalled to the point of death), my first thought was that Martin must have at least a cameo in the movie - I mean, think of the potential! The obvious inspiration here is the success of the Mummy series, and people went to see those films because they were campy fun - how can a good King Tut movie properly follow in those footsteps without Steve Martin? Sadly, however, Paramount has not yet seen the light, and Martin isn't associated with the project, which is described as "an action-adventure/romance pic, loosely based on Howard Carter's discovery of...Tut's treasures in 1922 Egypt."

Even more disappointingly, Martin is sure to appear in the movie that no one wanted but everyone saw coming: a sequel to his Pink Panther. The thing about this series is that even the originals weren't that good. Peter Sellers made them fairly tolerable, and there were rare moments of inspiration (most of them involving the above-it-all David Niven and George Sanders) but, really, even the real thing was average at best. If nothing else, then, Martin's installments will send us running back to the Sellers versions with a newfound regard for their passionate mediocrity.