Well, you can now put this in your pipe and smoke it: According to a rep from Warners UK, there will not be a feature film based on the hit television show Friends. Apparently they were all set to start shooting until someone read my Fan Rant on the topic and called the whole thing off. Yeah, I wish I was that important. Actually, Warner Brothers UK issued the statement after rumors flew all over the internet last week that a Friends movie was in the works after Sex and the City achieved boffo box office success. We picked up the story when it was still in its infancy stages, then wrote about how bad of an idea it was, and, as such, are quite happy to hear it's a no go.

Additionally, reps for Courteney Cox Arquette, Matthew Perry, David Schwimmer and Jennifer Aniston have denied any involvement in the feature film, with comments ranging from "Nothing is happening in this regard, so the rumor is false" to "blah blah ... does anyone really care what these people have to say?" I'm actually very happy to hear this and hope it sticks because this is a series that belongs on TV and not on the big screen. Leave it alone ... and, instead, go give us another South Park flick.

Will any of you lose sleep over this Friends news?

Here's a stat that may or may not blow your mind: According to Box Office Mojo, Sex and the City has grossed $312 million worldwide. Yup. $312,533,654 to be exact -- for a movie based on a hit HBO show that went off the air a few years ago. Since we all know what happens when Hollywood gets a look at those kinds of numbers, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to predict what the future holds: plenty more TV-to-movie adaptations. We're practically guaranteed another Sex and the City flick, and earlier today Monika brought us news that the long-rumored Friends movie might be moving forward.

Honestly, why wouldn't it move forward? You're telling me Matt Leblanc, whose last credit on IMDb is Joey, is holding out for a massive paycheck? Same goes for Lisa Kudrow, Matthew Perry, David Schwimmer, Courteney Cox and Jennifer Aniston, with the latter being the only one getting decent big-screen work (though, truth be told, she's about two movies away from becoming yesterday's news). The others are all showing up in bit parts, directing films that don't go anywhere and/or trying desperately to make the TV thing work again. Fact is, together they're a pot of gold. Apart and, well, we don't really care, do we?

But could a re-emergence on the big screen revive these careers? Could they somehow find a way to take the cutesy sitcom and turn it into a feature film people would actually want to see? Could Friends: The Movie make more money at the box office than Sex and the City? And should we care?

Back when I posted about television shows hitting the big screen in February, I included a joke Matthew Perry made about how the cast of Friends were "trying to organize a thing soon," but he meant a dinner, not a movie.

Did he, in fact, mean a movie? We can take this with a grain of salt right now, but The Daily Mail says that a film based on the popular series has gotten the green light to start filming in the next year and a half, with all of the actors interested in reprising their roles -- Jennifer Aniston, Courteney Cox, Matthew Perry, Matt LeBlanc, Lisa Kudrow, and David Schwimmer.

Basically, it's all said to be due to the success of Sex and the City, and their source says: "she [Aniston] and Courteney have already talked this summer about what they want out of a Friends movie, and if deals can be made with them, everything else can fall into place rather quickly." The rest of the piece has a bunch of particulars about money, and how the show is at the top of the TV-to-screen list.

Whether it's true or not, it makes sense. But do you want to see the friends reunite?

Cinematical has received this exclusive poster for Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa (click to enlarge), a follow-up to the very successful Madagascar. The film, which stars the voices of Ben Stiller, Chris Rock, David Schwimmer and Jada Pinkett Smith, follows our animal friends as they hatch a plan to get back to New York; more specifically, Central Park. However, when they attempt to fly themselves out, the crew accidentally crash land in the wildest place of all -- the vast plains of Africa itself. While there, they'll get a better feel for their roots, as well as the difference between life in the concrete jungle and life on the world's second largest continent. But with danger right around the corner, will this family reunion be cut short a little too soon? And will our heroes ever return home?

Find out for yourself when Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa arrives in conventional theaters and IMAX on November 7.

Today we speak with comedian/actor/writer/director Michael Ian Black. Black's hilarious credits include MTV's The State, Comedy Central's Stella, and the cult classic Wet Hot American Summer. He's probably best known to the general public as being the standout quipper on VH1's "I Love the (Insert Decade Here)" specials. Black's latest project is Run Fatboy Run. He wrote the original screenplay for the film, which was directed by David Schwimmer and stars Simon Pegg, Hank Azaria, and Thandie Newton.

Cinematical: Would you tell our readers a bit about Run Fatboy Run?

Michael Ian Black: Sure. It's a lovely and funny romantic comedy about a guy who has never finished anything in his life who decides to run a marathon.

Cinematical: What inspired you to write the film?

MIB: I wanted to write something a little more mainstream than what I am normally known for. I had just written two screenplays that were more left of center and I wanted to challenge myself to try to write something that I thought would be a little more accessible.

Cinematical: Are you a marathon man? Why do people do this to themselves?

MIB: I've never run further than a couple miles. I have no idea why somebody would subject themselves to the agony of running for twenty-six miles. Particularly if they've got a car.

When I refer to David Schwimmer's Run Fatboy Run as "a modern-day screwball farce," that's a nice way of saying it's outrageously predictable, unabashedly sappy, and completely formulaic through and through. You know where the movie is going from frame one, and it sure doesn't take a lot of detours getting there. But the phrase "screwball" probably wouldn't have come to mind if Run Fatboy Run wasn't at least a little bit funny. Which it is. So if you don't mind an amiable-yet-seriously familiar 90 minutes -- and you're a big fan of British actor Simon Pegg -- I'd have no problem recommending the flick. Even if I'd never come close to calling it something brilliant.

The effortlessly likable Simon Pegg stars as one of those lovably lazy sad-sack types that you only come across in comedic films: Despite the fact that he left his pregnant fiancee (Thandie Newton) at the altar five years earlier, Pegg's "Dennis" is one of those losers we love to root for. (How a doofus like this ever scored a catch like Thandie Newton -- and then abandoned her! -- is one of the film's sillier conceits.) So when his former flame's smarmy new boyfriend (Hank Azaria) mentions that he'll be running in an upcoming marathon, Dennis senses a shot at redemption.

It seems like just a few months ago we were enjoying the sights, the sounds, the smells and the cinema of South By Southwest 2007, but guess what? Now that it's January, the festival's only about nine weeks away! Awesome! So today we caught some slightly early news on what SXSW is cooking up for this March, and I must say I'm pretty impressed with what they snagged for their opening night film.

And that film is: Robert Luketic's 21, which is based on the book Bringing Down the House: The Inside Story of Six M.I.T. Students Who Took Vegas for Millions. (You may remember Mr. Luketic from flicks like Legally Blonde, Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!, and Monster-in-Law.) Adapted by Ben Mezrich's book by screenwriters Peter Steinfeld and Allan Loeb, 21 stars Kevin Spacey, Laurence Fishburne, Kate Bosworth and Jim Sturgess. (Check out the trailer right here.)

And if that world premiere isn't cool enough, festival chief Matt Dentler has also divulged the following titles for SXSW '08:

At the Death House Door (Steve James & Peter Gilbert) "A sobering and powerful story of the wrongful execution of Carlos DeLuna and the Death House Chaplain, Pastor Carroll Pickett, who spent the last day of DeLuna's life with him."

Dreams with Sharp Teeth (Erik Nelson) "A documentary portrait of acclaimed author Harlan Ellison, as he looks back on his fabled and influential career as one of the world's top science fiction writers."

Flawless (Michael Radford) "In 1960s London, a talented but overlooked diamond executive (Demi Moore) is convinced to participate in a jewelry heist when a veteran janitor (Michael Caine) hatches a plan."

Run Fatboy Run (David Schwimmer) "An out-of-shape divorced father (Simon Pegg) makes one last attempt to win back the respect of his son, his ex-wife (Thandie Newton), and the community around him. All he has to do is finish his first marathon."

Wild Blue Yonder (Celia Maysles) "Celia Maysles had no idea her father and his brother Albert were pioneers of verite documentary filmmaking. Determined to uncover the secrets surrounding her background, Celia sets out on a quest to rediscover her father by using his own artistic process."

Expect a few more flashy surprises before the full SXSW slate is announced on February 5! Until then, feel free to browse through the SXSW website and decide if THIS is the year you're finally going to take my advice and attend the dang festival. (You do know it's a movie AND music fest, right? Interactive, too, and I do believe I've mentioned the indigenous BBQ more than once.)

I'm excited enough that Rod Lurie is returning to politics with Nothing but the Truth, a film loosely associated with the story of Valerie Plame. But I'm becoming more excited that it will feature a wide range of talented actors, from Kate Beckinsdale to Alan Alda to Matt Dillon to Vera Farmiga to David Schwimmer to Edie Falco to Harry Lennix to the just-announced Angela Bassett and Noah Wyle. According to The Hollywood Reporter, Basset and Wyle join the ensemble as supportive figures. Bassett is to play editor-in-chief to Beckinsdale's reporter and Wyle is to play the lawyer defending Beckinsdale's character, who ends up in jail for not revealing a source.

More than 13 years after being nominated for an Oscar (for What's Love Got to Do with It), I'm happy to see Bassett getting more meaty roles. In addition to this part, which will probably be too small to garner too much recognition, she is set to star opposite Don Cheadle as the titular wife in the biopic Toussaint, and she's sure to be seen by millions and millions in Tyler Perry's next movie, Meet the Browns. Wyle, too, is deserving of making his mark on the big screen now that he's done playing Dr. Carter on E.R. Coming up for him is a father role in the 1963-set coming-of-age film Boy of Pigs and his directorial debut, a romantic comedy titled Prince Test.

The interesting thing about Nothing but the Truth is it somewhat seems to combine Lurie's The Contender (possibly my favorite political film ever), which also focused on a woman under heavy scrutiny, and his recent box office disappointment Resurrecting the Champ, which similarly dealt with the world of journalism. For the sake of this great cast, I hope Nothing but the Truth is closer to the success level of the former.

After Spaced, Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, it's widely believed that Simon Pegg can do no wrong; appearing as if custom-made to test that contention is the new comedy Run, Fat Boy, Run. Run, Fat Boy, Run gets approving nods from comedy connoisseurs when you mention Pegg's in the lead; mention the presence of David Schwimmer in the director's chair and their expressions change subtly ...

After the success of Friends, Schwimmer could have devoted himself to any number of pastimes -- stick-fighting, model rocketry, leisurely laps in a Scrooge McDuck-style pool of Sacagawea dollar coins. Instead, Schwimmer starred in Duane Hopwood -- which saw Schwimmer playing a barely-functioning alcoholic, as if a brief crawl through the gutter would get the Ross off him -- and here he makes his directorial debut.

Run, Fat Boy, Run stars Pegg as Dennis; five years ago, Dennis left his pregnant girlfriend Libby (Thandie Newton) at the altar. Now, he's living in a basement flat, working as a security guard, occasionally being a good dad to his son Jake (Matthew Fenton) -- and confronted with Libby's relationship with Whit (Hank Azaria), a well-to-do, can-do American. In a moment of weakness -- motivated by pride, or idiocy, or both -- Dennis reacts to Whit's bragging about his upcoming athletic endeavors by saying that he, too, is going to run the London Marathon ...

Back in July, Kate Beckinsale, Matt Dillon, Vera Farmiga, Edie Falco and Alan Alda were in talks for Nothing but the Truth -- Rod Lurie's upcoming political thriller. (If you remember, the movie parallels Valerie Plame's struggles.) They have all signed on, and now we've got another cast member that is, frankly, surprising. The Hollywood Reporter has listed Friends star David Schwimmer. Yes, Ross. Beckinsale is a journalist who exposes the agent and goes to prison when she won't reveal her source, and Schwimmer is going to play her husband. At first, he supports his wife's decision to remain silent, but as things progress, he "begins to resent her for choosing a principle over her family."

It sounds completely not-goofy, so will this be his chance to finally get some real cred? It's just such a strange choice... Sitting around the casting table, already having the likes of flipping Alan Alda, who thinks: "Hey, we should get David Schwimmer for the role!?" It's the sort of gig that many, many actors could fill in, so I would love to know what made them choose Ross. Maybe he can pull it off? But it isn't Schwimmer's only chance to prove himself. You might remember that he recently made a movie that sounds much more up his alley -- Run Fat Boy, Run. The teaser came out way back in February, and the Simon Pegg-starring comedy is finally premiering next month at TIFF, before it's released in October. What do you think? Does Schwimmer have it in him?