The blood-soaked Greek war epic 300 once again left the competition bruised and battered this weekend, taking in a cool $31.2 million to hold its No. 1 position at the box office.

Here's what Patricia predicted for the weekend box office on Friday:

1. 300
2. Premonition
3. Wild Hogs
4. Dead Silence
5. I Think I Love My Wife

And here's the actual top five:

1. 300 - $31.2 million
2. Wild Hogs - $18.8 million
3. Premonition - $18.0 million
4. Dead Silence - $6.8 million
5. I Think I Love My Wife - $6.8 million

Get the full box-office report here.

The classic Universal logo -- the one with the aeroplane circumnavigating the globe -- opens the studio's newest horror film, Dead Silence. It's a clever way to tell the audience "Look, you're not about to get your typical quick-cut hack & slash fest here. Despite the fact that Dead Silence is the second feature film from the man who directed Saw, we think you should try and settle into an 'old-school chiller' vibe with this one." And it's true: For much of Dead Silence's brief but deliberately-paced running time, the flick feels a lot like something that would have hit the screens back in 1952. (Or maybe whittled down into an episode of The Twlight Zone.) Whether or not the younger Saw maniacs will actually appreciate this diversion from formula remains to be seen, but as a guy who's just young enough to dig Saw, but certainly old enough to remember my black and white "creature double feature" TV marathons, I found just enough to enjoy in this one.

Ryan Kwanten plays Jamie Ashen, a young husband who loses his wife during a fairly chilling prologue. Basically, a creepy old ventriloquist's dummy is left on the Ashens' doorstep, Jamie heads out to get some Chinese food, and returns to find his pretty young wife ... in a really unpleasant state. This tragic event, combined with some insensitive accusations from police detective Lipton (Donnie Wahlberg), inspires poor Jamie to hit the road and revisit his withered old hometown of Raven's Fair. It's there he comes across his estranged old dad (Bob Gunton), a hot new stepmother (Amber Valletta), a terrified mortician (Michael Fairman) and his strangely off-kilter wife (Joan Heney).

Well kids, first let me congratulate you ... you did it. Redemption is yours as 300 is a huge hit. But, I see a relapse comin on as I fear many of you will make the same mistake I did ... thinking Chris Rock is still funny.

Chris Rick isn't funny anymore, and I'm not exactly sure why. I think it's partly because he thinks that the jokes he told ten years ago and recycles today are as funny and edgy as they were then. I think it's partly because he laughs the hardest at his own jokes. I think it's partly because the comedians working today are much more edgy so it makes it harder for him to stand out. Maybe it's because he spends more time producing now and less time developing as a comedian. Well, whatever it is, all I know is that until he shows me something new, I'm out. Speaking of out, let's talk about his super lame new movie.

Yes, he directs and stars in I Think I Love My Wife.

Rock plays a high powered investment banker with a beautiful wife and wonderful children. But he's not getting any at home and he fantasizes about pretty much every other woman he sees. And when the lovely Nikki (played by Kerry Washington) pursues him, will he be able to keep it in his pants?

The reel deal, this movie is SOOOOO not funny ... or well written ... or directed ... or acted. It's like he took a bunch of stand-up jokes and tried to edit them into a movie. And guys, if you're dopey enough to take your wife or girlfriend to see this movie ... and she's laughin' ... she's SOOO not laughin'. If she is, it's that "You ain't getting any for a couple week" sort of laugh. You know what I'm sayin'? I'm Out.

It seems like every actress these days either got her start as a model or scored an Estee Lauder/Noxema/Gap modeling contract after she hit it big in film. But when you think about it, there really aren't too many actresses who were actually well-known models before breaking into film or TV. Amber Valletta, star of not one but two new films out this week (Premonition and Dead Silence), is one such actress. She was a recognizable staple of women's fashion magazine covers, the star of Versace and Calvin Klein ad campaigns, and the host of MTV's House of Style long before landing the plum role of Harrison Ford's undead mistress in the 2000 hit What Lies Beneath. Since then, she's starred in a slew of films, including the Will Smith blockbuster Hitch and the action smash Transporter 2.

Of course, a symmetrical face, ample bosoms, sexy legs and perfectly formed buttocks do not necessarily equate to acting prowess -- so we decided to rank the success of runway walkers, Sports Illustrated swimsuit models, fashion mag goddesses and Victoria's Secret Angels who were first famous for modeling and only later broke into the movie biz. Check out our gallery of the Top 20 Models Turned Actors, then tell us how accurate our model-turned-actress-ranking skills are.

Hey there. Kevin managed to unlock his manacles and escape ... err, "go on vacation," so I'm filling in for him this week. Don't worry, I have been inducted as a bonafide prize-giver and stuff, so I promise not to trash your entries and take off with the swag -- though I was tempted by the prizes for last week's contest, three shiny new copies of the Borat DVD. But I did the right thing and handed them over to the lucky winners below, all of whom will now be able to pause on the naked wrestling scene in the comfort of their own living rooms. High fiiiive!

This week, we've got a photo from Dead Silence, the latest horror film from the Saw team. This one's got ventriloquist's dummies in it, and that's all I can say, as I've officially freaked myself out. Write one of three winning captions, and you will receive a bonanza of Dead Silence swag, including a t-shirt, a cup, a hat, and the movie soundtrack -- but no ventriloquist's dummy, alas. Of course, if you're actually disappointed at not getting one of those, I am now officially freaked out by you.

1. "That night marked the end of Pictionary in their household." - William G.

2. "I come dressed in character and NOW you tell me our film isn't even nominated???" - Erik V.

3. "Sacha Baron Cohen is one upped at his White House dinner when G.W. wrestles naked with Alan Greenspan." - Chris O.

See full image and all captions

This week's contest:

UPDATE: WINNERS ANNOUNCED! Click Here

To say that director James Wan "hit the lottery" with his debut flick would be a huge neon understatement. Mr. Wan's little Saw movie has yielded a certifiable cash cow for the lucky folks at Lionsgate Films -- so what's next for this young filmmaker? (And by "next," I mean "something other than a producer's credit on Saw 9.) Well, we're still waiting on word regarding the guy's Dead Silence, which I'm pretty sure is, like, completely finished and ready for consumption -- and now comes word that Wan's third feature is a revenge thriller called Death Sentence.

In this one, Kevin Bacon will play a guy who wreaks horrifically creative revenge on the scumbag punks who murdered his family. Former 5th Wheel / Talk Soup hottie Aisha Tyler will play a cop who goes along for the ride. So ... Death Sentence is basically The Crow meets Death Wish meets every revenge thriller ever made? Only time will tell. The project is based on a novel by Brian Garfield, a book in which Aisha Tyler's character is actually a middle-aged man.

Smart rewrite there, fellas.

What with all the Saw sequels that seem to pop up every Halloween, we might have forgotten to ask, hey, what's the original Sawmaker up to these days? Well, the guy's been working on his follow-up fright flick for quite some time now -- only nobody seems to know what to call the thing!

Directed by James Wan and written by Wan and Leigh Whannell, the flick was originally meant to be called Shhhh, but then everyone realized how silly that was, and it was agreed that Silence would be the new title. And then it got changed to Dead Silence. And now, for whatever reason, that's no good either.

As mentioned at Dread Central, the trailer for Mr. Wan's sophomore effort is supposed to be showing in front of Saw 3, so it's in everyone's best interest to settle on a name already. How about The Unnamable or The Un-Entitled?

My #1 favorite horror site, Bloody-Disgusting.com, is spending some solid time at Comic Con, and those bloodthirsty little kooks are reporting on every single horror-centric tidbit you could possibly imagine. In addition to their thorough obsession with Grind House, the BDboyz have also brought us the following news:

• A Saw 3 clip that seems more than a little Barker-esque. And another nasty poster. Coooool. Also, Saw 4 is almost certainly going to hit theaters next October. Yay.
  
• Wan & Whannell, creators of the original Saw, have their new flick, Dead Silence, almost finished.
• Feast (finally) hits DVD on October 17th. They better stick to the date.
• The trailer for Renny Harlin's The Covenant is now online.
• The House on Haunted Hill sequel we mentioned last week? Going direct-to-video.
• Lionsgate will release Ju-On: The Grudge 2 on DVD come October 10th. Strange coincidence: The Grudge 2 hits theaters on October 13th.
• Probably not anytime soon, but Sam Raimi assures us that the Evil Dead remake will happen eventually.
• Neil Marshall just dropped a juicy little teaser: The Descent 2 will be coming soon...

Who knew a comics convention would yield so much cinematic splatter? That's it: Next year, it's Comic Con for Weinberg.