How did the remake of a wildly popular Asian romantic comedy end up going direct to video? We'll have a chance to examine the wreckage for ourselves when My Sassy Girl, starring Elisha Cuthbert and Jesse Bradford, hits DVD on August 26. Grady Hendrix at Kaiju Shakedown comments: "I thought this was a bad idea, but then I saw the trailer. " If you follow that link to YouTube and watch the woe-begotten thing to the end, you are very brave and I salute your adventuresome nature. To be absolutely fair, it could be that the movie is terrific and the trailer is a terrible misrepresentation of its merits, but I wouldn't risk a rental on it.

Though I admit to a knee-jerk suspicion about English-language remakes of foreign-language pictures, in this case I wasn't a big fan of the Korean original, which was a box office smash in its native land in the summer of 2001. It was also a big hit in Hong Kong the following year, and US festival audiences lapped it up (e.g. it won the Audience Award at the first New York Asian Film Festival). Personally, I thought the humor was too over the top and the basic premise too difficult to swallow. (Here's a review I wrote in 2002.) That might make me receptive to a remake, but it doesn't look like director Yann Samuell or scripter Victor Levin licked the problems I saw in the original.

Yup, I'm totally serious. This one exploded late last night; it was all over my RSS Feeds, plus I've received, like, 7 emails about it. I'm sure you already know what I'm going to say, but in case you don't -- check this out: Megan Fox is hot. OH, and sexy. Fo shizzle my Cinezzle! Yes, Megan Fox (who you might remember as Sydney from Hope & Faith) was just named the sexiest woman in the world by FHM Magazine. (Voting for sexiest girl in the universe begins next month.) Fox, of course, became a household name after starring in I'm Totally Hot: The Movie (aka Transformers) last summer. (And on a side note: I wonder what her boyfriend did this morning? Do you think he woke up, locked the bathroom door, and high-fived his reflection in the mirror? Because I would totally do that if I was dating the hottest girl in the world.)

Last year's "champion," Jessica Alba, got knocked up and fell down to third place, while Jessica Biel (2), Elisha Cuthbert (4) and Scarlett Johansson (5) rounded out the top five. Biel? Really? I still don't see the appeal. Same goes for Cuthbert -- have you seen her in person? Girl is like four inches tall. Anyway, this came via a reader poll and FHM says 9 million votes were cast. For those wondering (and I know there's a lot of you), Paris Hilton landed at number 77 and Britney Spears placed at the very bottom ... number 100. Hey, God bless the gal for even making it, right?

And now, of course, our obligatory "Megan Fox is hot" photo gallery. Enjoy!

Sexy is as sexy does, I guess. Picking the hottest chicks of horror is a pretty tricky business. Not only are my picks completely subjective, slaves to my personal whims and moods, but also they are likely to change from day to day. Already, since I submitted my picks, I'm regretting not mentioning Milla Jovovich in Resident Evil, or Eihi Shiina in Audition. And what can I do with more obscure hotties from other eras like Jenny Wright in Near Dark, or Britt Ekland in the original The Wicker Man, or Simone Simon in Cat People? Do they not deserve a shot at hotness? Well, in any case, here are the seven I wound up with -- in chronological order -- and in all honesty, they're all pretty darn easy on the eyes and a little spooky besides.

1. Fay Wray in King Kong
In a movie entirely populated by men and beasts, Fay is a welcome bit of softness. If King Kong had been made two years later, the Hays Code would have required Fay to wear a high-necked negligee with bloomers and probably several other layers of underthings. But thankfully for generations of young boys, the film was made in 1933, and Fay was able to wear her flimsy, silky number that clung and flapped in the breeze. Likewise, the movie was better able to suggest the subversive relationship between beauty and beast. (Watch the trailer ... or head straight to the gallery!)

2. Elsa Lanchester in Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
Elsa was the ultimate goth chick in cinema. Many came in her wake, including Barbara Steele (Black Sunday) and the little known but easily recognizable Carroll Borland (Mark of the Vampire). But make no mistake: even without her two-foot fright wig with the silver piping up the side, Elsa was a hottie in her time. You can see it in the film's prologue; she plays Mary Shelley, freshly emerged from penning her chilling magnum opus. She has cat eyes, and a devilish grin that entrances even the strongest men. One question: if Dr. Frankenstein was able to build such a sex bomb, why did his male monster come out so ugly and blocky? (Watch the trailer ... or head straight to the gallery!)

*Photo courtesy of The Hot Blog

So we've spoken at great length about the MPAA and the way in which they go about approving billboards. Earlier in the year, After Dark Films found themselves in some hot water after a billboard for Captivity that wasn't approved by the MPAA found its way onto city streets and on buses. Apparently, those ads, separated into four different frames, featured Elisha Cuthbert's eyes and the words 'abduction,' 'confinement,' 'torture' and 'termination.' Folks were pretty shocked to see a woman's eyes on top of those four words, and so the ads were immediately yanked while After Dark Films was slapped with all kinds of sanctions. Cinematical later spoke with After Dark's Courtney Solomon who attempted to clear up the skirmish.

Now, as you can see above, there's a new billboard for the movie Beowulf featuring the mo-capped, left-boobage of Angelina Jolie. And it's a PG-13-rated film. Am I missing something here -- who at the MPAA approved this advertisement? Is this appropriate for 13-year-old kids? She's obviously naked in the picture, except for the fact that they did something weird to her boob, making it look like she's wearing a strange, golden bikini top ... as her hair "slithers" and "snakes" around her body. Hmmm. Personally, I think we, as a society, need to loosen up a bit -- but I do find it interesting that the MPAA would allow an image like this for a PG-13-rated film. I wonder how many guys will get into fender-benders while reaching to get a closer look at Jolie's breast? What do you think?

It looks like Tim Allen, otherwise known as Henry Lefay, has found his second, and err...umm... fourth wife. (This one got a repeat performance!) The Hollywood Reporter has posted that The Six Wives of Henry Lefay has finally finished its cast with Darma herself -- Jenna Elfman. The movie, which started shooting in Connecticut this week, is about a man (Allen) whose wife and ex-wives fight over his will when they think that he's dead. Elfman's character is the "small-town diva" wife. Since they range in ages from 25 to 55, you can imagine what sorts of jokes the flick will likely use.

Elisha Cuthbert, who will play Allen's daughter, told Cinematical about the feature back in June, and THR followed suit with most of the wives in August. They are: Andie MacDowell, Paz Vega (Spanglish), Kelli Garner (Thumbsucker), and S. Epatha Merkerson (Law & Order). Considering the fact that there's only five, I don't know why the flick, written and directed by Howard Michael Gould, couldn't be called The Five Wives of Henry Lefay. Is this supposed to be funny and quirky, like that whole "Happyness" title?

Seeing that they make sure to mention that Cuthbert's character doesn't marry, and IMDb lists one other person on the cast -- Eric Christian Olsen (The Last Kiss) -- I'm thinking he's her love interest. You know -- the father is so very dysfunctional (especially if he's only assumed to be dead) that she has to figure out if she can handle a real, long-term relationship. Or, maybe I'm wrong and he's a gardener, a step son, or something else.

In June, Elisha Cuthbert broke the news to our Ryan Stewart that she would be starring in a family comedy called The Six Wives of Henry Lefay with famcom guru, Tim Allen. As she described it: "it's a really fun family film about a girl who has to organize her father's funeral in the midst of dealing with six ex-wives." Now official word is out, plus more details about the production and who exactly is involved. As The Hollywood Reporter describes it, the film, which will be directed by Shrek the Third scribe by Howard Gould, "centers on a man (Allen) whose wife and five ex-wives -- ranging in age from 25 to 55 -- fight over his will when they believe he is dead." So, the guy might not be dead, and will pop up later as a surprise? Perhaps he'll reveal that it's all just a rouse?

We already know that Cuthbert is the daughter, but what of the wives? So far, Andie MacDowell, Paz Vega (Spanglish), Kelli Garner (Thumbsucker) and S. Epatha Merkerson (Law & Order) are in talks to play spouses. Who will fill in for the final two wives remains to be seen. Perhaps this will be the big comedic comeback for MacDowell, who hasn't found many high-profile roles since her success in the 90's. But forget that for a moment and take a look at that list of wives. They not only tap into a few nationalities and races, but also a spectrum of ages. Garner, who recently played Justin's girl in Thumbsucker, is just two years younger than Cuthbert. Considering all the types of women the film is picking, I won't be surprised if we see a man amongst Allen's wake of wives. We should have more news for you soon, as production begins next month in Connecticut.

Wow. The film that was supposed to serve as the 'alternative programming' to the Harry Potter onslaught this weekend barely opened at all. All the free press and marketing in the world, a popular young starlet, an Oscar-nominated director, and all the rest of it barely lifted Captivity to an absurd 12th place finish for the weekend, topping out at an estimated $1.5 million. Assuming these estimates hold up on Monday morning, the film did less business than Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Ocean's Thirteen and several other films that have been around for weeks and weeks. It did just a tad more business than Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End, which has been kicking around for months. In fact, it did only marginally better than Evening, the small-budget weepie featuring Claire Danes and Meryl Streep that creeped into theaters two weeks ago on a very limited platform and had practically no marketing push whatsoever. How is that even possible?

Anyway you slice it, this disasterous showing will have huge consequences for the horror genre going forward. Horror films of the 'torture porn' variety will probably not disappear from theatrical release all-together, but I bet that, going forward, the more gruesome elements of these films will be completely hidden by the marketing gurus rather than promoted. Also, films currently in production that could fall into the torture porn category, like the remake of the Wes Craven film The Last House on the Left will become a seriously tough sell. As for R-rated horror in general, the next test will be Rob Zombie's Halloween in late August. If that does well, expect the heat to cool off a bit, but in all seriousness, what is wrong with the American movie-going public? Aren't there any horror fans still out there? Am I the only one left?

I'm so annoyed that I have to pan Captivity, the horror film we've been hearing about forever that's finally arrived in theaters. The reason I'm annoyed is because I'm a fan of horror, the more extreme the better, and I couldn't be less on the same page as the Nikki Finkes of the world, who think that even working for a publicity firm that does business on behalf of a film like Captivity makes one morally bankrupt. So let me reiterate: I'm not one of those critics who would slam a horror film for being horrifying. I could conceivably write a glowing review of a movie where the lead actress is gang-raped by a group of angry coal miners, gives birth to a two-headed rape baby, and then is forced to eat that baby moments after delivering it. What I can't get on board with is directorial incompetence, which Captivity is, sadly, overflowing with. A retarded gorilla with nervous bowel syndrome could have done a better job of directing this film than double Oscar-nominee Roland Joffe, it seems.

The film drops us into its situation with next to no foreplay: a popular actress/model named Jennifer Tree (Elisha Cuthbert) is kidnapped during a night out at a club. An unknown party slips something into her drink, she stumbles into an out of the way area, and the next thing we see is her waking up in a makeshift jail cell that's presumably located in the kidnapper's basement. A lot of torture follows -- editing-room torture. Someone was clearly worried that audiences would be bored by extended takes of a woman sitting alone in isolation, so the movie makes the most awkward jumps forward in time, going from having Cuthbert's character being alone in her cell to being suddenly strapped to a gurney while a hooded figure walks around her in circles, ominously. Important information is lost in the cuts, like where the kidnapper is coming from, and what avenues of escape that could present the heroine. The film is so devoid of establishing shots that we have to accept the torture scenes on a nightmare level.

Earlier this week, I got a call from Elisha Cuthbert to discuss what has to be the most talked-about movie of the year so far, Captivity. If I actually tried to give you a rundown all the digital ink we've spilled on this little horror film since the beginning of 2007, I'd never get around to actually typing out this interview, so I'll just choose a few highlights, like the original outbreak of controversy over the film's graphic billboard advertising back in March, the harsh response by the MPAA, the arrival of the first trailer, the release-date musical chairs, and our exclusive interview with After Dark Films about the whole project and the fuss it had caused. As you can probably imagine, the first question I asked Elisha when I spoke with her was, inevitably, 'Do you get asked your opinion about Captivity every single day?'

Elisha is, of course, known for her starring roles in such films as The Girl Next Door, where she played a mercurial porn star called Danielle, House of Wax, the 2005 horror remake in which she starred alongside a pre-incarceration Paris Hilton and famously allowed the stunt people to glue her lips together for a crucial scene, and the Will Ferrell comedy Old School. She's also widely recognized for her work on the small screen, appearing for several seasons as Jack Bauer's daughter on the hit show 24. Those two worlds are expected to collide sometime in late 2008 or 2009 as a movie adaptation of 24 ramps up production, but until that happens, if it happens at all, Cuthbert has a number of projects on the runway to keep her busy. Here is the interview, and fair warning -- it does contain some spoilers about Captivity.

RS: What's it like being at the center of this film's controversy-fueled marketing campaign for the past few months? Do you get asked your opinion about Captivity every single day?

EC: Not every day, but I definitely get a lot of questions about it. To be perfectly honest with you, a lot of it baffles me, and a lot of it is intriguing at the same time, because I had no idea that, in the world of the Saws and the Hostels ... somehow our film has sort of stuck out. I'm grateful for that, but at the same time, I'm a little confused. I know that we had some controversy with the womens' groups, and I just feel like I wanted them to see the film before making any judgments on it. I set out to make a film about a woman who fights for her life and comes out in the end sort of strong and learns something from her experience. But 30 million people chatting about it online? I couldn't ask for anything more!

RS: Did you find the billboards personally offensive?

EC: I personally didn't, but then again that doesn't mean it's not going to affect someone in a negative way, and we're here to sort of appease the people who go see the films. The only thing I can say about it is that I thought that they were interesting enough to be up. I hope people see the film and give it a chance. We're not here to sort of ... this isn't a documentary about, you know, women getting kidnapped. This is a horror film.

RS: Where do you come down on the whole recent issue of R-rated horror films like Hostel II seeming to give ground to films like 1408, which are PG-13 and clearly less gruesome?

EC: I don't know, you know, it's hard to judge. I think that, back in the day, there used to be a lot of horror films that kind of had a checklist of what went into making the 'perfect horror film', and I think now people are raising the bar in the industry, as far as the types of horror films that are being made. There's a sort of psychological undertone to films. 1408 -- I think we're also in the same realm as that, just as the Hostels and the Saws, because there is that sort of psychological fear and we're basing something on reality. I don't know -- it's tough to say, I just think the industry in general and the genre in general has changed and modified -- people want to see more.

Earlier today, I received a call from Elisha Cuthbert to discuss her upcoming movie Captivity -- I'll be posting that interview as soon as I have time to sit down and type it out -- but since the news cycle doesn't sleep, I thought I'd go ahead and give you the casting news that she dropped to me during the course of our talk. She's just signed for a family comedy called The Six Wives of Henry Lefay, and she begins shooting in mid-August. Rumors have flown for a while that this would be Tim Allen's next project, and Cuthbert confirmed his involvement to me in addition to her own.

"I'm gonna go off and do a movie with Tim Allen," she said. "It's a comedy and it's got a huge cast. Coming off of Captivity, where it's pretty much only me in the film -- with Sassy Girl, I'm playing opposite Jesse Bradford -- I sort of wanted to find an ensemble film, and this one happened to come my way. It's called The Six Wives of Henry LeFay and it's a really fun family film about a girl who has to organize her father's funeral in the midst of dealing with six ex-wives. It's so funny. It's so much fun, and it's gonna be great to work with six different actresses. It's gonna be a great time, so I'm looking forward to that." There's not much more information about Six Wives that's been made public yet, but now that the cat is out of the bag, expect to hear a lot of details soon. Stay tuned to Cinematical for all the latest.