I've got to wonder... If there is an afterlife, can those who have died see what's happening on earth? Variety has just reported that Peter Hyams is going to helm a remake of Fritz Lang's last American film -- Beyond a Reasonable Doubt. What would Lang say if he heard this his film was going to be remade by the man who brought us Running Scared, Timecop, The Relic, and End of Days? That's not to say that the man can't do it, or that great directors can't fail (as Gus Van Sant's Psycho taught us), but his track record doesn't instill much confidence.

The classic, which focuses on an ill-advised scheme to point out the flimsiness of circumstantial evidence, will get "a true 21st century spin for a new generation of cinema-goers," according to Foresight head Mark Damon. Yet again, I ask why it couldn't have just been "inspired by." The original plot: A publisher wants to make a point about how crappy circumstantial evidence is, so he talks his would-be son-in-law into planting clues suggesting he was behind a recent murder. At the last moment, they could bring out the truth and reveal the flaws in the system and death penalty. However, the guy holding that all-too-important information dies and mucks up the plan.

Anyhow, it's got an, um, interesting cast to boot -- Michael Douglas, Amber Tamblyn, and Jesse Metcalfe. They've certainly younged it up a bit -- the main players in the original, names like Dana Andrews and Joan Fontaine, were all at least in their mid-thirties. Whatever the case, we've got the King of California, plus a girl with a kick-arse 3D glasses-wearing dad and some traveling pants, and John Tucker all spun together for this century. I like most of the cast, and I still can't help but think: Why bother?

I ended my subscription to Tiger Beat years ago, I haven't seen John Tucker Must Die and I don't watch Desperate Housewives, so every time I see the name Jesse Metcalfe, I can't place him. First, I confuse him with Jesse Bradford, another young actor. Then, I imagine he looks like a young, male version of Roseanne's Laurie Metcalf (they're not even related, as you can guess by the name spelling). But apparently the guy is quite a heartthrob -- not a teen heartthrob, though, as he's about to turn 29. That should certainly help the appeal of Insanitarium, which he's just been cast in, according to The Hollywood Reporter. The rest of the fairly obscure cast includes Peter Stormare (Fargo), Kiele Sanchez (that attempted new cast-member of Lost from last season), Kevin Sussman (Ugly Betty's "Walter") and Olivia Munn (co-host of G4's Attack of the Show).

The indie horror thriller has been written by Jeff Buhler (the upcoming Midnight Meat Train adaptation), who will also make his directorial debut. The plot involves a mental hospital (aka, umm, insanitarium) where a crazy doctor (Stormare, possibly channeling his character from Minority Report) experiments with his patients, giving them a drug that turns them into flesh-eating psychopaths. Metcalfe plays a guy who fakes crazy in order to join his sister (Sanchez) in the hospital, and save her. That leaves Sussman and Munn, both of whom hopefully get to eat a lot of flesh. The movie is being produced by Mason Novick (film fest sensation Juno), J.C. Spink (The Butterfly Effect), his partner, Chris Bender (Red Eye) and Andrew Golov and Larry Shapiro, who also produced an upcoming movie titled Zombie Strippers.

Director Joel Schumacher recently spoke with a Canadian news service about the next movie he's filming, the Nazi-horror film Town Creek. First of all, "there is blood in it, but it's not really a vampire movie," he says. Schumacher also said the first part of the film will be set in 1936, at the height of Hitler's power, and the second half will be set during the present day, the theme being 'ghosts of the past rising up to confront today's world.' "It's about Hitler and Himmler and Goebbels' association with the occult -- this is what they based the Master Race on." He continues "the one thing about the Nazis is that they so loved themselves that they documented everything, and there are these great documentaries on Hitler's obsession with the occult. So it's a 'horror' movie based on that by a very intelligent young writer."

The writer in question is Dave Kajganich, whose sole prior credit is writing the Nicole Kidman thriller The Invasion. The film will hopefully have some impressive visuals -- the effects are being handled by Ian Wingrove, who has worked on everything from Alien vs. Predator to Mission: Impossible to The Avengers, so it doesn't sound like this is a Merchant Ivory drama. No solid plot points were discussed in the interview, nor were any further casting announcements made -- the current roster includes Dominic Purcell, Jesse Metcalfe and Joy McBrinn. Schumacher fans might also be interested in the rest of the article, which delves into Car Wash, St. Elmo's Fire and Schumacher's unlikely mentorship from Woody Allen.

Dave Kajganich has had a lot of lucky breaks. Originally a teacher from Ohio, he decided to hone his skills by writing a screenplay. From there, it was one swift jump to Tinsel Town. First, he sold his Town Creek spec to Warner Bros. Then, he penned Nicole Kidman's upcoming film, The Visiting. Christopher Campbell reported that the Wachowski brothers were brought in to re-write its ending, but Kajganich is still going strong. He signed on for a Pet Sematary remake and is working with Sam Raimi on Monkey's Paw. Top all those goodies off with a spot on Variety's "10 Screenwriters to Watch", and the man is flying high.

Now, his favourite script and first sale, Town Creek, is preparing to be filmed next Spring. In September, Erik Davis reported that Joel Schumacher signed on to direct the film. Now the main roles have been cast. Dominic Purcell of Prison Break and Jesse Metcalfe from Desperate Housewives will star as the revenge-filled brothers who find themselves part of an occult experiment. I assume that "occult experiment" is another word for "vampire Nazis," or Kajganich did some script re-jigging.

While I'm interested to see Schumacher's first vampiric film since the eternally entertaining The Lost Boys, I'm also apprehensive. Can he make a film without the leads needing to be nipply? Better yet, will it be able to stand out in the influx of German-themed movies lately? And, is it about vampire Nazis or not?!

Back when I was in college, there was a brief period (about six months or so) where I suddenly found myself wrapped up in New York City's club scene. Don't ask me why (peer pressure) or how (peer pressure) this happened, but it's safe to say I managed to survive without permanently melting my brain. Since then, I've always found myself somewhat curious every time Hollywood attempts to re-create the club scene. Are they accurate? To date, I have yet to watch a film that correctly captures the essence and mood of a bumpin' (slang for really good) club, packed full of intoxicated teenagers all grooving to music as if it's taken over their every movement.

2004's It's All Gone Pete Tong came pretty close, as did 2000's Groove, however it always feels as if something is missing. Is it the acting? Is it because the filmmakers themselves have never experienced a week full of all-night clubbing? Not sure. But until a film comes along that accurately depicts the scene, most people will have to stick by their pre-conceived notions of these clubs being full of glow-sticks, ecstasy pills and not much else. With that said, Jesse Metcalfe (John Tucker Must Die) has signed on to star in Loaded, where he'll play your typical rich club kid whose life spirals out of control once he's introduced to a world full of drugs, sex and violence. Also starring in the pic are Nathalie Kelley, Monica Keena, Johnny Messner, Vinnie Jones and hip hop performer Kurupt.

Will Loaded finally get right what so many previous films got wrong? Probably not -- I mean, this is Hollywood and they're going to throw as much conflict at this sucker as possible making it so the club is the villain, and not the individual. So, this question goes out to all you former (or current) club kids: Have you ever watched a film that accurately captures the clubbing experience?

John Tucker is the kind of boy whose powers of attraction are a mystery to everyone outside his immediate presence. Not smart, blithely fake, and not particularly interesting, he coasts by with a combination of bland good looks and the mysterious draw of Popularity, a phenomenon that feeds on itself -- he's popular, and therefore people like him. Especially girls. As played by Jesse Metcalfe in Betty Thomas' new film, John Tucker Must Die, the movie's title character is nothing more than a pretty picture, almost totally lacking in personality. Much like Metcalfe himself on-screen, Tucker replaces emotions with bright smiles, and soothes all worries with a confident word.

To give the womanizing Tucker his comeuppance, Thomas and screenwriter Jeff Lowell provide a trio of exes who, during an unexpected PE volleyball game (their regular teacher had a heart attack induced by John Tucker's charms), discover that they're all dating him at the same time. Though originally mollified by his ernest insistence that each of them is, in fact, his only secret girlfriend, the three are jarred out of their Tucker-nosis by Kate (Brittany Snow), a newcomer whose mother (Jenny McCarthy) has dated a fleet of her own John Tuckers. Taking Kate on as a sort of teacher-cum-apprentice, the girls resolve to teach the lying, cheating Tucker a lesson. If they can't make him undatable (they can't), they'll break his heart instead.