Despite the fact that not a single person (I heard even Madonna thought it was crap) will confess to liking his more recent gangster flick, Revolver, Guy Ritchie is still getting jobs based on the success of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch (Yeah I know -- I forget they were two different movies, too.). This time, his employer is Columbia Pictures, which has hired Ritchie to rewrite and direct a movie called Static. One guess what it's about: Yes, more gangsters for Guy.

The central figure in Static is a gangster who has been unjustly imprisoned, and is on his way to testify against the bad cops that put him away. Problematically, there are a lot of other bad cops and rival gangsters trying to keep him from doing so. Thus, it's up to the poor, misunderstood gangster and his "loyal posse" to get to the courthouse on their own. So, basically, it's 16 Blocks, except with a posse instead of Bruce Willis, and without Mos Def. Super.

Static has been on the books at Original Film (a Sony-based company that is supervising the film) for years, and has been set up in the past with both Stephen Kay and Chris Robinson (not the Black Crowe, the guy who made ATL) at the helm.

Now that it's obvious British filmmaker Guy Ritchie can't keep remaking Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels forever, and it is clear he can't do anything else (or, at least, not remakes of Italian films, anyway), what is the poor Mr. Madonna to do? Well, he could probably live off his wife, for one. Or, he can make a documentary about his favorite pop religion, Kabbalah. Last weekend he was at a service at the New York Kabbalah Centre telling people of his plans for this doc, which will include the parallels between Kabbalah and Freemasonry, which were written about in the 1871 book Morals and Dogma, by Albert Pike.

As far as paying tribute to one's religious roots goes, Ritchie should take note of John Travolta's travesty, Battlefield Earth. Sure, that movie wasn't about Scientology, but it didn't help the public perception of L. Ron Hubbard, or the religion he founded. You might argue that Mel Gibson did more than okay with his religious pet project, The Passion of the Christ, but then Christianity has a much greater following than Kabbalah. I just don't have much faith in Ritchie's documentarian skills to think this film will do much good for the Centre. Though it shouldn't be any worse than Britney Spears' bandwagon membership giving Kabbalah embarrassing exposure throughout last year, either.