It's very popular to hate on princesses right now thanks to Disney and their frenzied marketing, but there's nothing wrong with a good fairy tale once and awhile, especially if they're served up with a bit of snark. So, I have some hope for Once Upon a Time, an Enchanted sort of story that's being set up at MGM. It's moving pretty quickly too. The script was snapped up in March, and now The Hollywood Reporter says that Mike Mitchell is coming on board to lend his Shrek-honed skills to the fantasy flick.

The story follows three famous princesses: Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, and Cinderella, who have settled down in domestic bliss with their Prince Charmings, and are prepared to live happily ever after. But the Charming Brothers go missing (clearly, they're charming, but they lack street smarts) and our pretty sisters-in-law must team up, and set out to save their true loves. But a woman's job is never done, and they also have to save their fairy tale kingdom in the process.

It's a live action film, and THR notes that MGM is aiming for a Shrek and Enchanted level of satire. This almost feels like a Shrek spinoff, as all three princesses keep getting more and more screen time in the neverending ogre franchise. Hopefully it'll mix the best of Shrek with a dash of Ever After and Enchanted, and give girls some new princess costumes to wear on Halloween. Ones with swords.

If anything can make you forget the disappointment of Quantum of Solace, it's the news that James Bond 23 has taken the first big steps into production. No, that's not casting Bond girls or plotting explosions, but writing the script. Not surprisingly, producers Michael G. Wilson and Barbara Broccoli have looked again to the cream of Britain's film crop and hired a man who's gotten some attention at the Oscars lately: Peter Morgan. Few of his scripts have gone wrong (The Other Boleyn Girl is one mark on an otherwise impeccable record .. and even then, it's not that bad) and he'll definitely lend a lot of gravitas to the project. A lot.

Morgan won't be penning 23 solo, however. He's got some old hands in
Neal Purvis and Robert Wade (the pens behind both Quantum and Casino Royale), who are returning to the franchise ... and well, so long Paul Haggis. I guess he's taking the fall for Quantum.

So, now to find that new director. Rumors swirled that Danny Boyle had been offered the job, but that was quickly shot down by Boyle in an e-mail to EW. While it's always possible he could duck in once the script is done, we need to look to the rest of the United Kingdom ... and possibly to Morgan himself, who is about to make his directorial debut with The Special Relationship.

Back in January, we all recoiled a little bit at the news that Neil LaBute was remaking Death at a Funeral -- a nice little British movie that only just came out in 2007, making a remake seem even more superfluous than they usually are. The fact that he was making it with Chris Rock made the whole thing seem even more cheesy. (Not that we don't like Rock ... it's just that we like him in original, edgy stuff.)

Well, the remake just got a lot more over the top. The Hollywood Reporter has announced that Martin Lawrence and Tracy Morgan have joined, along with Loretta Devine, Ron Glass, Danny Glover, Regina Hall, James Marsden, Zoe Saldana and Columbus Short. (Who wants to bet money that Marsden is the gay lover? Anyone? Anyone?)

It's keeping the exact same plot of misplaced cadavers, gay blackmail, hallucinogenic drugs, and family secrets, though Rock cowrote the script with Ayesha Carr, so we can expect some changes. It's just not clear yet what they might be ... but at least it probably won't involve bear suits or misogyny. I'm still not convinced this needed to be remade, but I suppose if you're going to do one, it ought to feature Danny Glover. Let's just hope Tyler Perry stays a million miles away from the set.

ETA: Yes, the title originally read Tracy Jordan. I watch way too much 30 Rock.

Have you ever wondered how, exactly, the Hollywood studios came up with their logos? No, not really? It's cool, I've never given much thought to it either, but the folks over at Neatorama did, and they tracked down the stories behind the logos for Dreamworks SKG (boy fishing on a moon), MGM (which was your favorite lion?), 20th Century Fox, Paramount (are those real mountains?), Warner Brothers and Columbia Pictures (who's that torch lady again?). It's a rather fascinating read, if only to learn the names behind the artists who created some of the more recognizable images in film history.

From the Dreamworks SKG description: "Spielberg wanted the logo for DreamWorks to be reminiscent of Hollywood's golden age. The logo was to be a computer generated image of a man on the moon, fishing, but Visual Effects Supervisor Dennis Muren of Industrial Light and Magic, who has worked on many of Spielberg's films, suggested that a hand-painted logo might look better. Muren asked his friend, artist Robert Hunt to paint it. Hunt also sent along an alternative version of the logo, which included a young boy on a crescent moon, fishing. Spielberg liked this version better, and the rest is history. Oh, and that boy? It was Hunt's son, William."

Check out the rest over on Neatorama. Which logo is your personal favorite? (And is it weird to have a favorite Hollywood studio logo?)

OK, I highly doubt that anyone has ever sat down to read Dante's Divine Comedy and thought, "Hey! This would make a great video game!" -- But I guess there have been worse places to get an idea. Variety reports that Universal has snapped up the film rights to an upcoming console game with the working title of Dante's Inferno.

Universal was the lucky winner after a bidding war erupted between major studios (including Warner Brothers, MGM, and Paramount) for the netherworld adventure. The project went to Universal for the low, low price of a seven-figure deal, and this is the first title Electronic Arts has sold this year that was not based on an popular existing game. This brings EA's total to three film deals this year, with the possibility of a Sims feature (which some of us might have tried to block out), and then the announcement of an Army of Two feature film with Bourne scribe, Scott Z. Burns.

Since it's still early days for Inferno, not much is known about the game other than it will take players on a journey through hell. The games creator's will be taking a hands-on approach to the adaptation, and according to Variety , "Making a movie deal well before the game's release will give EA a shot at seeing a movie released closer to the beginning of the game's life cycle." I don't know about that, but I do know that it can't be any worse than most movie tie-in games.

UPDATE: Cinematical has been given this brand new still from the film, which shows Cruise without the eye patch.

MGM seems to be trying to reverse the effects of the doomsaying that circulated about Tom Cruise and Bryan Singer's Hitler-assassination-attempt thriller Valkyrie in the spring, culminating in the announcement that the movie was moving from December 2008 to President's Day 2009. That was received as a surrender, a sure sign that the studio had no confidence in the film and was doing damage control by moving it out of harm's way. Now, following some successful test screenings, MGM has reversed itself and is moving Valkyrie back into the heart of Oscar season: December 26, 2008. Apparently, though, the studio still doesn't think it has awards potential, and is making the move because it thinks Valkyrie will do well in the Christmastime marketplace.

I'm sure positive test screenings did have a lot to do with MGM's decision, but I think it's a smart move because it's great spin control. The press loves to read the tea leaves of studio behavior, and will see this as a major vote of confidence. I suspect the buzz on Valkyrie will seriously improve now that it is no longer the subject of what was perceived as a February dump.

For my part, I don't care about Tom Cruise or his silly eyepatch, but I have a lot of trust in Bryan Singer. The man can make a good mainstream thriller, and I don't see why Valkyrie should be any exception. I think a lot of the "bad buzz" (such as Roger Friedman randomly attacking the film) is just Cruise-bashing, which may be justified but probably shouldn't extend to his movies.

I heard Wednesday is the new Tuesday ...

We never thought it would happen, but Hollywood has finally invented a time machine and is using it to resurrect a number of old franchises. From indieWIRE comes news that MGM's Mary Parent and Harry Sloan are interested in finding out whether audiences want Sly Stallone to return for another Rocky installment. The article adds, "Parent asked for a show of hands from the audience who might be in to that. Though there were a few very enthusiastic responses, many kept quiet." Hmm, maybe they were just pretending not to listen.

During the same MGM panel, Parent mentioned the recently-announced Robocop remake and said it "would be great in 3-D, as would something we're hoping to announce soon." Announce soon? What is it? Could it be Rocky vs Robocop: The Future Ends Here ... in 3-D? Fingers crossed. Here's our earlier story on the Robocop remake, which also includes a remake of Red Dawn. God help us. [via Moviehole]

Finally, on the Star Trek front, a few possible spoilers have leaked out over at TrekMovie.com. I won't go into many details here, though I will say the spoilers have to do with the several different ships featured in the film. Speaking of, what's the official title for this flick? Do we have one yet? Is it just Star Trek? Star Trek XI? How about Star Trek New Beginnings: The Future and the Past Together At Last? On a separate note, MTV spoke with William Shatner who -- wait for it -- is still pretty upset about not being included in the new film. His words (not mine): "I'm solidly behind being disappointed that I'm not in it." Next week Shatner re-phrases things and notes: "I'm not not devastated, though I am positive about being negative."

We have no details at all beyond what you just read in the headline, but THR is reporting that MGM has remakes of Robocop and Red Dawn in the works. (L-Rappe had some buzz on Robocop right here.) Studio chiefs Harry Sloan and Mary Parent must have simply stood up at Cannes and said out loud: "MGM is remaking Robocop and Red Dawn" before vanishing into a hotel or something. So in lieu of additional information regarding cast and crew, I'll just fill a second paragraph with some ranting.

First off, you're never going to improve on Paul Verhoeven's Robocop, which is just about the most spot-on, no-bullsh!t action satire you'll ever see. Unless MGM wants to hire someone like David Fincher or Brad Anderson, I don't have a very good vibe on a Robo-remake. And Red Dawn? Well ... obviously you'd have to update the villains, wouldn't you? Viewed through a socio-political spectrum, John Milius' Red Dawn might be one of the most "outdated" action movies at the video store. Plus, as cool as it looks on screen, the concept of paratroopers invading America is pretty damn hilarious.

So obviously I don't think much of either project at this point. (Sorry, but when I read the word "remake," my brain heads right to the word "lazy," although obviously that's not always the case.) But of course I'll see both of 'em as soon as they come out. I just can't help it. And since it's also an '80s-era MGM title that begins with a "R," I guess you can expect a remake of Road House soon enough.

Seems like we bloggers spend about half our time blogging about blogging. Whether it's stories about how blogging is bad for your health (so that's my excuse!), or about how bloggers are replacing newspaper film critics, writers love to write about writers. So the logline for Bobism, a film whose screenplay Variety says MGM has just purchased, made me laugh -- I'm sorry, made me LOL:

"A shy collegian learns that life 1,000 years in the future will be based on his blog."

Ha! That's awesome. And really, it's only fair. Hollywood makes lots of movies about out-of-nowhere athletes who become superstars, thus fulfilling the fantasies of legions of armchair-quarterback viewers who dream about the same thing happening to them. They make plenty of romantic comedies where women live fabulous lifestyles (usually working at a magazine) and wind up wearing the perfect wedding dress as they marry the perfect guy, thus fulfilling the fantasies of millions of female viewers. So it's about time they make a wish-fulfillment movie for us bloggers, where we get to indulge our daydreams of being really, really important!