Forget about a blood bath, this movie features enough red syrup for a blood flood. Maybe you saw Rose McGowan in Grindhouse and thought, 'Pretty good, but not enough severed limbs and geysers of blood. And wouldn't it be cooler if she had a machine gun arm instead of a leg, and it had a chainsaw attachment?' Well, have I got a movie for you!

Noburu Iguchi's The Machine Girl, which was released on DVD last Tuesday, features copious spraying fountains of blood and dozens of detached body parts. Add ninjas, yakuza, a flying guillotine and a drill bra to your basic 'revenge for the murder of an innocent loved one' formula, and I think you already know if this movie is up your alley.

Scott W. pointed to the trailer over at Twitch last year and, truthfully, nearly all of the movie's best bits are highlighted in that two-minute blast of gore. But, really, if you're a fan of this kind of stuff, you'll want to see all the action sequences in their complete, unrated, unadulterated, possibly nauseating glory. Watching the entire movie also makes it abundantly clear that the filmmakers did indeed have their tongues planted firmly in cheek. After all, you can't slice up this much latex and spill this much blood without having a demented sense of humor, can you?

I do love a good trailer. I'm one of those people who gets to the theater in plenty of time for the previews, and if I see a movie that has one or fewer trailers playing with it I feel gypped. It's as much part of the experience as overpriced popcorn and ill-timed cell phone usage. Man, did I see a lot of trailers this year. 2007 was my first full year of doing the Trailer Park feature here on Cinematical and the experience has strengthened my appreciation for the form. I'm not placing these in any particular order, but here are ten trailers that really got my attention this year. Some of the movies I've seen, some I haven't, some have yet to be released, but all (in my humble opinion) do an exceptional job of selling the film. My choices, of course, are purely subjective and will undoubtedly conflict with yours, so please add a comment and let us know what your favorite trailers of 2007 were.


Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (teaser)
This one may have dropped in late 2006, but I''m including it here for two reasons: I mentioned it in a Trailer Park last January and it kicked serious ass. Sure, the full length trailer had a little more meat on its bones, but it's the teaser trailer for the Fantastic Four sequel that had people talking, myself included. The wedding of Mr. Fantastic to The Invisible Woman (a pivotal moment from the early Lee and Kirby issues of the Fantastic Four comic) is interrupted by the arrival of The Silver Surfer. The Human Torch gives chase across the skies and through the tunnels of New York. One of the first movie's biggest problems was that the Torch wasn't able to fully exercise his powers until near the end of the film, but this time we get it up front in the trailer.

Cloverfield (teaser)
No one knew what to expect when this trailer showed up with Transformers last summer, but it has since inspired all kinds of speculation as to what this movie is all about. A hand-held home video of a farewell party in New York City is interrupted by a power failure. A massive roar can be heard off in the distance and a gigantic fireball engulfs a large chunk of the city. Huge pieces of shrapnel fly everywhere, including a large chunk of metal that turns out to be the Statue of Liberty's head. This is one of those trailers that is so good you find yourself saying, "the hell with that movie I just paid to see, I want to see this one right now." To further tantalize audiences, producer J.J. Abrams and company didn't even tell anyone what the title was at first. The full length trailer that followed added more footage, but failed to be as engaging as the original teaser.

Not that the films represented here are knock-offs, but each of them reminds me of a movie I've seen before.

10,000 B.C.
The title makes me think of 1966's One Million Years B.C., the only film to combine the way cool stop motion animation of Ray Harryhausen and the presence of Raquel Welch in a fur bikini. This new film about the early days of human civilization lacks the entertaining anachronism of ancient humans fighting dinosaurs, but there's some pretty decent CGI woolly mammoths and saber tooth tigers here. The story focuses on a mammoth hunter and his quest for a secure future for his tribe. Historically accurate? Doubtful, but it looks like an entertaining bit of eye candy.

Machine Girl
I had heard nothing about Machine Girl prior to seeing the trailer, but I want to see this one RIGHT NOW! This over the top and gory Japanese martial arts revenge movie contains elements culled from more kung fu flicks than you'll be able to count. A young girl embarks upon a path of vengeance when Yakuza murder her family and cut off her arm. Yakuza! Ninjas! Severed limbs! The Flying Guillotine! A man is forced to eat his own fingers as sushi and there's something called the "drill bra" that you just have to see for yourself. You've also got a big honkin' machine gun and a chainsaw at work. The trailer is extremely graphic, so if crazed kung fu carnage upsets you I suggest avoiding this one. As for the rest of us, the line forms behind me. I don't see this getting a wide U.S. release, so I suspect we may have to wait for the DVD. Scott Weinberg also seem enthusiastic about this one.

If you thought Rose McGowan with the machine gun leg was something else, just wait till you feast your eyes on The Machine Girl! Yes, that's right: A sweet Japanese teenage lass has been damaged beyond repair by the evil Yakuza, but with the help of a stump-mounted machine gun (and a whole bunch of other freaky weapons), this gal's gonna have her revenge! And how!

If you have a strict aversion to over-the-top arterial sprays and hardcore gore, then definitely don't check out this brand-new Machine Girl trailer over at Twitch.com. Anyone else should feel free to enjoy the Asian insanity. According to the Twitchers (and they know their Asian genre fare, trust me), The Machine Girl comes from the folks responsible for Death Trance (which I haven't seen) and Meatball Machine (which is certifiably bizarre), plus the trailer certainly looks chock-full of over-the-top chop-socky. Sign me up.