Somewhere inside Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins -- buried in frenzied improvisations and manic mugging, adrift in a sea of easy sentiment and familiar family-drama moments -- there's a kernel of a good idea, as successful L.A. self-help guru Dr. R.J. Stevens (Martin Lawrence) comes back home to the South for a family celebration. R.J.'s got it all -- the syndicated, Montel-styled talk show, the beautiful fiancée, the Hollywood good life -- but that doesn't seem to impress the family he hasn't seen in 9 years, who know him as Roscoe Jenkins. Much like Dan in Real Life, Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins puts a self-help expert who is in desperate need of help for himself into the middle of a sprawling, squalling family, and that environment makes the distance between the persona and the person readily, painfully apparent. And, much like Dan in Real Life, Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins skims the surface of that idea, scooping up a few laughs and a bit of drama, but it never digs too far below that, or really engages with the central plot.

I'm surrounded by four gregarious guys who ride Harleys, blow up bars and throw down with a rival biker gang named the "Del Fuegos." And strangely, I'm not afraid of getting my ass kicked. Perhaps that's because the aforementioned Harley pilots are John Travolta, Tim Allen, Martin Lawrence and William H. Macy, and they did all of that stuff in their new road-trip comedy Wild Hogs. The guys and I are in Boston, the second stop on their Wild Hogs promotional tour. Yesterday, they were in Atlanta, where long-haired, bearded, diehard bikers turned out in droves of thousands to follow the foursome as they cruised the streets on their hogs. A similar event -- a police-escorted bike ride from Beantown's Four Seasons Hotel to City Hall -- had been planned for later today, but alas the 18-degree temperatures and 40 mile-per-hour winds have crapped all over that plan like a pigeon on a motorcycle helmet. Instead, John, Tim, Martin and Bill will arrive for a ceremony with the Mayor Thomas Menino in big, warm, comfortable Suburbans. (More on that later).

For now, however, we're sitting in a warm hotel room at the Four Seasons listening to Allen work on one hell of a hilarious non sequitur in his patented Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor manly yawp: "I'm Spartacus. Who's Spartacus? I'm tired of dying. I'm tired of eating soup. Who's Spartacus? I'm Spartacus!" He's got me and his Hogs co-stars in stitches -- that is, until he blurts out, "Does it involve a spanking?!" Then the silence hits -- but only briefly, before another bout of prolonged laughter.

Two minutes in, and it's already clear that these four guys don't just play pals in a movie; they are pals. When Travolta claims, "I have to edit everything Tim says," Allen retorts with a comical threat in his best Arnold Schwarzenegger accent. And when asked who the most skilled rider is, they bust each others chops mercilessly one moment, then dole out Coca-Cola-sweet compliments the next.

Wow, this is awesome. Usually we have to wait for a DVD release to be offered a meaningless (and generally entertainment-free) collection of movie bloopers, but the marketing team behind the motorcycle comedy Wild Hogs has decided to dole out those goodies extra early. Click right here to see if this material makes Wild Hogs look more appealing ... or less. (Still, it's a bit funnier than the trailer.)

Starring Tim Allen, John Travolta, Martin Lawrence and William H. Macy, Wild Hogs comes from second-time director Walt Becker (after Van Wilder) and first-time screenwriter Brad Copeland -- a man who has penned a few episodes of Arrested Development and My Name is Earl and must therefore have some talent. Plus the flick seems to have a Ray Liotta cameo, and really, doesn't every movie need a Ray Liotta cameo? The Disney comedy opens on March 2.

Once upon a time, a guy in the throes of a midlife crisis would buy himself a red sports car. But these days, any balding, potbellied man worth his salt trades in his SUV not for a Corvette, but for the biggest, fastest motorcycle he can find. Four wheels bad, two wheels good!

That's the premise behind the upcoming comedy 'Wild Hogs,' which stars John Travolta, Tim Allen, Martin Lawrence and William H. Macy as suburban schmoes who hit the road, badass biker-style. Of course, they find that being badass isn't quite as easy as the brochure made it sound, even if they are sporting those studly black do-rags and leather jackets.

You can watch the trailer at the official site, but you can only see the poster right here. Click on the image for the super-size version, and then tack it to your wall while you wait for your own hog to arrive from the shop. Your wife/mom/grandma won't mind. 'Wild Hogs' opens March 2, 2007.

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GET IT: More info on 'Wild Hogs'

Look, I like Martin Lawrence. I like him as a stand-up comedian and I like him as an actor -- but I absolutely hate the roles he takes on. He sort of reminds me of Eddie Murphy in that both men have made some great little flicks (Bad Boys for Lawrence and Beverly Hills Cop for Murphy), but then somehow found themselves climbing out of a deep hole filled with crap. In fact, the two even starred in one such "winner" -- remember Life? Ugh.

I've always wanted to see Lawrence grow up a bit, take on a role that's not so silly and ridiculous, while adding a nice touch of heart in at the end. Well, his next project may just make all my Martin Lawrence wishes come true. Universal Pictures has attached Lawrence to star in The Better Man, with Malcolm Lee (Roll Bounce) set to direct. Pic revolves around a popular syndicated talkshow host who, after attending his parents 50th anniversary alongside his famous wife, begins to ponder whether he's getting the most out of life. It appears Lee agrees with me, as he goes on to say: "There's emotion and pathos here that give Martin a chance to display more layers than usual." Yes! Give us that! Get out of the fat suit for God's sake and take on a real role. The Better Man will be produced by Scott Stuber and Mary Parent, and will go into production this March.

What do you think of Martin Lawrence? Has he shown us all his cards, or do you feel he still has a few surprises left up his sleeves?

If the idea of seeing John Travolta, Martin Lawrence, Tim Allen and William H. Macy do the following things sounds appealing to you, then by all means you should click right -->HERE<-- and watch the all-new trailer for Wild Hogs. Ready for the list? OK...

• Scream at children
• Search for internet porn in a crowded coffee house
• Get hit in the crotch with softballs
• Fall off motorcycles
• Get hit in the neck with birds
• Blow up a bar
• Get hit in the butt by a bull
• Spoon in bed together

Now, far be it for me to judge a movie I've not seen, but I'd be willing to bet my Criterion Edition Brazil DVD that I just described the very best jokes to be found in the whole of Wild Hogs. Aside from the intriguingly odd foursome, there's nothing about this comedy that looks even remotely fresh or appealing. (Plus, the trailer has the one little "wistful" moment, which means the fart jokes and pratfalls will, somewhere around the end of Act II, give way to some really mawkish sentimental crap ... and I've got no patience for pap like that.)

The screenplay comes from first-timer Brad Copeland; the director is Walt Becker, last seen cinematically as the man who helmed Van Wilder. (Yes, it's taken Becker four years to rediscover his muse.) In addition to the four aforementioned knuckleheads, Wild Hogs also promises bit parts from cool folks like Ray Liotta, Marisa Tomei, John C. McGinley and Stephen Tobolowsky. The "City Slickers meets Masters of Menace "opens on March 2.

Wait ... Tobolowsky's in it? Sold!

If the most entertaining thing about your animated kiddie flick is the cool 3-D effects, that's probably not a promising sign. That's the thought that popped in my mind about a third of the way into Open Season, the latest studio offering targeted toward young kids (and their parents' wallets) in a year way over-flooded with animated fare. The one big thing working in Columbia/Sony's favor on this one is that they're releasing the film at a time when there isn't a lot of other competition, and that's probably a good thing for the film and its ultimate box office take.

The film has a basic storyline that a lot of kids will no doubt find appealing: A bear who has been raised by a park ranger with all the comforts of modern life meets a wild-and-crazy deer rejected by his herd, who induces him to party all night on a sugar high, tearing up a store. Because of this, he must be released into the wild, where he will first dislike but eventually bond with the deer, mingle with assorted wild critters (all also cleverly personified) and eventually, work together with them to take down The Man, aka the hunters who have just descended upon their domain because it's, well, open season. Get it?

Ever since I first heard about its existence, the mere mention of Disney's Wild Hogs had the power to transfix me with horror. Set to star the dream team of Tim Allen, Martin Lawrence, and John Travolta, the movie tells the heartwarming story of "A group of middle-aged wannabe bikers look for adventure out on the open road, where they soon encounter a chapter of the Hells Angels." I mean, honestly. How could anyone at Disney possibly read that summary and actually think "Why, I think we've got a winner"?

Though the law apparently prevents the public from suing studios to prevent them from making bad films, the Hells Angels may have found just the loophole we need: trademark violation! According to a lawsuit filed Wednesday in California, "the characters in the movie are identified as members of the [Hells Angels] club and wear [their] logos," thus infringing on the group's trademark rights. While there is the small issue of the club perhaps never having seen a script (which makes their confidence about how the movie looks a little suspect), the mere suggestion that Wild Hogs could be stopped makes this thrilling news indeed.

A few months ago, I reported the very alarming news that someone decided to pay John Travolta and Tim Allen to appear together in Wild Hogs, a comedy about suburban, middle-aged men who buy motorcycles and hit the road because the think it'll make them macho and happy. Or something. And now, an idea that already seemed to be pretty much the bottom of the barrel has gotten even worse: Martin Lawrence will be joining them. I can't decide if I want him to bring the fat suit or leave it behind - the whole thing is just so depressing that it's hard to decide which would be more egregious.

As I said last time I discussed this movie, my problem is much less with the throwaway plot than the fates of its stars. People, Tim Allen is an talented, intelligent comic actor - remember? And John Travolta? Annoying, but better than this. Martin Lawrence? God only freaking knows what to make of that guy, really.

All my whining aside, however, I realize they all signed on the dotted line for this one - they must all be building homes, or something. They'll start earning the cash this May, when production begins in New Mexico.

Believe it or not, being a film critic does have occupational hazards above and beyond Martin Lawrence movies. Or paper cuts. Or eyestrain, or exploding pens. The occupational hazard I'm thinking of is one you only encounter when you see a number of movies that's unquantifiable as a number, but instead expressed as a number of films somewhere between 'more than a normal person would' and 'less than Scorsese.' Now and then, you just run across a film so … like … another film that you can't help but judge the second film unkindly. And this is what happened today to me at Sundance, at one of the most crowded press screening's I've been to so far, for the documentary Wordplay.

Wordplay is, essentially, about New York Times Crossword Editor Will Shortz. The film takes Shortz's life and work and puts it under the microscope, as well as showing us the previously-hidden (or, rather, easily-ignored) world of the  Annual American Crossword Puzzle Tournament, held every year in Stamford, Connecticut. The film has plenty of interviews; it talks about the tradition of crossword puzzles; it follows regular (and not-so-regular) people who have applied themselves to become crossword champs; it uses computer effects to show us the nature of the mechanics of a pastime that uses a rigid structure to contain and celebrate all the boundless flow and flux of English.

In other words, it's a lot like the Sundance 2004 Scrabble documentary Word Wars. Not just in matters of topic and tone, either; the structure, editing style and interview techniques of Wordplay are so similar to Word Wars that I had to double-check to make sure it wasn't a follow-up film from Word Wars directors Eric Chaikin and Julian Petrillo. Wordplay is directed by Patrick Creadon, who's spent 25 years working on documentary films alongside his wife – and it is a light, fun, fluffy bit of piffle.

And by 'piffle,' I mean that Wordplay has all the gravitas of lint. Creadon talks to several famous crossword buffs – Bill Clinton, Jon Stewart, Ken Burns, The Indigo Girls, Yankee pitcher Mike Mussina – and gets fun, light stuff out of them. Stewart is the best, shouting at the NYT crossword with mock bravado: "Bring it on, Shortz! Bring it!" Clinton and Mussina are charming and agreeable about their pastime, while Burns is, like his films, self-important and dull. Burns explains: "I don't smoke, I don't drink coffee, and I don't need to have a drink at the end of the day. What I do need is to solve the New York Times crossword, every day, in ink." I'm far, far from grade school, and I wasn't a bully back then, but It's been decades since I wanted to wedgie someone and then smudge their glasses as badly as the smug, simpering Burns seemed to be begging me to in that moment. 

We also meet several crossword buffs getting ready for Stamford: 20-year old wunderkind frat-boy puzzle-nerd Tyler Hinman; Ellen Ripstein, who had an 18-year-long series of top finishes  that never got her a championship until 2001; professional crossword creator Trip Payne; paternal and polite project manager Al Sanders, who's come in third place five of the prior six years of the tournament.

But as the film builds up to the Championship, I realized that what Scrabble has – and crosswords do not – is a face-to-face, one-on-one element of direct conflict between people. When Trip and Ellen and Al are tying to beat a crossword puzzle, the person who made it isn't sitting across the table from them, actively changing things to thwart their progress. Word Wars had a clash of people and personalities that raised my interest level; people solving crosswords against a timer is a challenge, but it's not really a conflict.

Of course, if I hadn't seen Word Wars, I may have liked Wordplay just fine. It's a nice little movie: To use Mamet-speak, it's 'cute as a pail of kittens.' Shortz is a likable, affable, smart guy who seems to be well aware he's found the gig he's always wanted to have and feels lucky in how much he loves his work. And the audience at the press screening seemed to like it  – possibly because the average crossword buff is so insular, obsessive, goal-focused and nerdy that they make the average film critic look like Cary Grant or Angelina Jolie in comparison. (During the Stamford tournament, Trip reacts to final scoring: "It's a three-way tie for first! That's going to be epic!" You understand that Trip is into what he's into, but at the same time you'd think a word nerd would have a better understanding of the actual definition of 'epic.' ) In 2004, Word Wars brought Sundance Scrabble; in 2006, Wordplay brought Sundance crossword puzzles. I'm looking forward to 2008, and some hypothetical documentary titled Qu is All or Knit-Wits or Assault and Philately rocks Park City with incendiary filmmaking that rips the lid off Boggle, knitting, stamp collecting or some other boring, dorky time-killer hobby White people do when they're lonely and smart. Wordplay isn't awful, but the fact is that seeing it after Word Wars makes it feel like a redundant reflection of a similar, better film about pretty minor pastime.

Others on Wordplay: Writing at Flavorpill, Lisa Rosman says the film "may be a trifle, but it's a fun trifle," while Variety's Justin Chang calls it a "buoyant and exhilaratingly brainy docu[mentary]."