The part of me that loves strange premises is having daydreams of Liam Neeson and James Nesbitt (Match Point) getting to grab each other's hands, giggly with giddy glee, whilst running off for five minutes of heaven in some closet somewhere. Sure, it should be seven minutes, but still, this title makes me think of teenage forays into kissing, not the serious themes that it's actually about.

Variety reports that both actors have signed on for a new film called Five Minutes of Heaven, and it's about the troubles in Northern Ireland -- not exactly prepubescent romantic fare. Under the eye of director Oliver Hirschbiegel (The Invasion), the film focuses on "two men wracked by the violence that plagued Northern Ireland from the late 1960s through to the peace process in 1998, and how they attempt to come to terms with the Troubles' aftermath."

The project is currently filming on location in Northern Ireland.

After watching The Invasion, I sincerely hope that Nicole Kidman becomes the next test case for the new Jim Carrey-style Hollywood deal, where talent receives no money up front and must live or die by the quality of the film they make. An actor with her star power, while not in a position to challenge the Warner Bros. decision to replace director Oliver Hirschbiegel and remake large portions of this film after what they deemed to be an unacceptable first cut, could certainly have taken some kind of stand for basement-level quality control that doesn't exist here at all. The Invasion is a borderline-unreleasable mess, with unfinished scenes, absurdly rushed exposition, and a plethora of random bad decisions that could only be the product of a hugely stressed production. Whose idea was it, for example, to embarrass Kidman with a Carmen Electra-sized Wonderbra that she totes around for most of the picture? Also, this has to be the first time I've ever seen an adrenaline-syringe-in-the-heart scene filmed with the casualness of a blocking rehearsal.

The set-up: A returning space shuttle explodes upon re-entry and the pieces are scattered over Nowhere, America, leading to a montage of the great unwashed reporting the crash to the news media. I'm not sure if the body snatchers crashed the shuttle on purpose or if they were just hitching a ride and something went wrong, but either way their mission is accomplished -- they are now extant on Earth and can get down to their business, which is infecting all of us through liquid contact and turning us into Democrats. You see, we're told repeatedly that body snatchers are peaceful and that once they rule the roost, there will be no more war and violence. As they begin to turn more and more people, we start to see 'positive' news on television screens -- President Bush warmly meeting with Hugo Chavez, for example, with Bush having presumably been turned. By the last act, the recurring visual of a smartly-dressed Kidman being chased through D.C. parking garages by the aggressive peaceniks plays like a reel of Ann Coulter's nightmares.

Only two weeks left before we get to see The Invasion, Warner Bros.' latest version of the Body Snatchers storyline, and the studio has issued another poster for the movie. It seems to be a design for one of the foreign markets, though, because the release date is given as August 23 instead of August 17. That would be the date for release in Hong Kong (according to IMDb) and Germany (according to Box Office Mojo), but I can't find any other indicator of where this poster is being distributed. And I haven't heard anything about the movie being pushed back for six days in the U.S ...

Regardless of where it's going, the new one-sheet is pretty cool. Over at Bloody-Disgusting.com they're calling it "lackluster", but I actually like it. Sure, it isn't as beautiful as the poster we've seen at the multiplex all month, but I can appreciate this one on its own. As a fan of To Die For, I'm always happy to see Nicole Kidman illuminated with a blue tint. I also like the way that Kidman looks a bit creepy here. It goes a little better with the movie's theme than does a shot of the actress appearing worried or afraid. I can't understand why Daniel Craig isn't featured -- is he not a star in either Hong Kong or Germany? -- but his expression in the American poster is so out of place that I don't really mind.

I think if this were the German poster, it would somewhere promote the movie's director, Oliver Hirschbiegel, whose Downfall was the German nominee for the 2005 Foreign Film Oscar. This is the filmmaker's Hollywood debut and I'm curious to find out, if possible, how it is received in his homeland -- especially considering he was replaced for re-shoots and I'm sure it bears no resemblance to his usual work. I'm also just as curious to see how The Invasion is received here. So far we've seen both good and bad reactions from the test screening stages. I can't wait to find out next Friday.

Two days ago, Collider wrote up a breathless story about the results of some research they did into the situation with Nicole Kidman's long-in-production remake of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. When compared with the L.A. Times story from March, their report is different only in terms of the severity of the changes that Warner Bros. supposedly ordered up. To back up a bit, for those who haven't been following the story, The Invasion was originally lensed by German director Oliver Hirschbiegel, the much-heralded German director who directed the Hitler film Downfall a few years back. When he turned in his cut of the film in late 2005, Warner Bros. found it lacking in action beats and brought in the Wachowski brothers and their V for Vendetta director James McTeigue to re-work the film. All of that has been known for a while.

Collider is now reporting that their sources say over two-thirds of the film's script -- which probably means every word -- was re-written when the Wachowskis and McTeigue came on board the project. It's starting to sound more and more like the film was made, and then re-made, which doesn't shock me or anything. This kind of thing probably happens more often than it becomes of interest to the blogosphere, but in this case the interest mostly lies in the fact that director Hirschbiegel is by no means a hack. He's not one of those music video or commercial guys who get their 'shot at the big time' and then get tossed to the curb when it becomes painfully clear they don't have the right stuff. Anyone who has seen Downfall knows this guy is an artist. So, are there going to be two wildly different versions of The Invasion in existence? An arty, German-flavored (probably superior) version and an explosion and philosophical gobbledegook-laden version? Enquiring minds want to know.

Yesterday's L.A. Times carried an interesting article on the difficulties foreign directors often face when brought in to helm a major Hollywood production. Two Sandra Bullock movies -- last year's The Lake House and the forthcoming Premonition -- were both cited as examples where a foreign director was brought on board, only to clash with Hollywood norms. Spy Game, Mad Love, and other films of recent years are also referenced as facing similar issues. Even more interesting than the general topic, however, was the light the article shed on goings-on with one recent production, the big-budget re-make of Invasion of the Body Snatchers, called The Invasion, starring Nicole Kidman and Daniel Craig. The Times article tells of how German director Oliver Hirschbiegel -- who impressed Hollywood with his Hitler epic Downfall, and was then offered the director's chair on The Invasion -- turned in a cut of the film at the end of 2005 that the studio was greatly unhappy with.

According to the article, the studio was "so unhappy with the results that it brought in 'Matrix' creators Andy and Larry Wachowski to do rewrites and then hired James McTeigue, who directed 'V for Vendetta' for the studio last year, to do nearly $10 million in re-shoots..." One of the studio's problems with the film was apparently that it didn't have enough action; Hirschbiegel wouldn't comment for the paper, but allowed his agents to say that the lack of action was not his fault, but due to budget constraints placed on him by the studio. The Times did get hold of Warners honcho Alan Horn, who gave a more positive spin on the whole issue, claiming "we needed to do re-shoots, as is often the case, and Oliver wasn't available, so we used someone else." Will there one day be a 'Hirschbiegel's Director's Cut of 'The Invasion'' in stores? Who knows. The studio version will be released August 17.

One of my most anticipated films for 2007 has suddenly dropped down the list. Normally, I know better than to have high expectations for a movie, but Warner Bros.' decision to do yet another take of Jack Finney's novel The Body Snatchers starring Nicole Kidman and directed by The Downfall's Oliver Hirschbiegel had me pretty darn excited. But now, according to TMZ, the studio is unsatisfied with the ending of the film, which is titled The Invasion. Supposedly it just isn't thrilling enough, which could actually be more a problem with the way Hirschbiegel shot the film than with the way the screenwriter, Dave Kajganich, wrote it. Either way, producer Joel Silver has hired Andy and Larry Wachowski to rewrite the ending. In my opinion, this was the wrong move, because I think The Wachowskis are pretty horrible writers. I know a lot of people don't agree, though, and those people will likely be more interested in this film because of the Wachowskis' involvement. It isn't clear in the report whether or not Hirschbiegel will get to do the reshoot himself, or if The Wachowskis, who are currently set to direct Speed Racer, will take that job as well.

This is yet another example of why great foreign filmmakers should heed the call of Hollywood. I don't know if it is always the language-barrier problem, which supposedly made Jeunet's shooting of Alien: Resurrection difficult, or if it is that the studio way is hard to adjust to. Sure, for every Matthieu Kassovitz there is a Fernando Meirelles, and looking back through film history we see a plethora of great successes who transplanted well into Hollywood, but too often there comes another director not suited for the system. I bet that the original ending is pretty interesting, if not thrilling enough for a mass audience. After all, the ending to The Downfall was done extremely well --- and I don't mean story-wise, because obviously an ending with Hitler's death is a good ending.

This can't a great time for Hirschbiegel. Claudie Bobsin, who was his costume designer, just died of cancer. His breakthrough film, Das Experiment, is being made somewhat obsolete by a Hollywood remake. And now, his English-language debut is going through the old U.S. b.s. machine. Take my advice, foreign directors, don't come to America unless you are confident that you will beat the studio control.