PamelaAnderson Tagged Articles at Cinematical

You kids today, with your Marvel Studios and your top-notch directors. Many of you are too young to remember just what ugly treatments comic books received in the 1980s and 1990s. Oh sure, there was Tim Burton's Batman, but treatments like David Hasselhoff's Nick Fury: Agent of SHIELD were the norm. When a Thor movie was kicked around, the only requirement was muscles and blonde hair. In the 1990s, there was one man that fit that description: Fabio.

A funny little flashback has surfaced on Colleen Doran's blog, which has prompted a delightful trip back in time at Mania. In 1997, Fabio decided that he wanted to play Thor, so he approached animation director Seth Kearsley, and they cooked up a storyline with the help of Henry Gilroy. As Mania points out, this was not a Marvel movie , but it casually borrowed a few elements. The result, pictured to your right, was an unholy blend of Marvel's Thor and Captain Marvel / Shazam where Thor was punished for his arrogance by being shoved into the powerless body of a young boy. Despite its cheese and lack of Hollywood backing, it managed to recruit a lot of comic book talent for its designs, including Hellboy creator Mike Mignola. They were also desperately seeking Charlton Heston to voice Odin, and were in negotiations with Pamela Anderson to voice the Valkyrie Brunhild. But it died off, never to be seen again ... until the Internet could laugh about it.

You know ... we often chide movies for being completely devoid of reality, but just sometimes, there's someone dumb enough to really buy into it. I mean really buy into it -- literally. I'm not talking about gals finding Pretty Woman romantic -- they're talking about Julia Roberts as a prostitute, not prostitution in general. They fall for the story, not the reality. Instead, I'm talking about the living embodiment of Indecent Proposal, and an actress actually dumb enough to think that's romantic.

I've been sitting on this news for a day, since it's supreme-o gossip, but I just have to share. If you haven't already heard, Pamela Anderson was on Ellen DeGeneres talking about her new romance. This story is so damned romantic, that you better brace yourself: she fell in love with a poker player who offered to pay off her $250,000 debt if she had sex with him for a night. Hollywood.com quotes her as saying: "It worked out; I liked it ... I paid off a poker debt with sexual favors and fell in love. It's so romantic." Sure it was, if selling your body for sex is romantic. What is she thinking?

She's not. Who is this wonderstud of morals? Rick Salomon, a.k.a. the dude who distributed his infamous sex tape: 1 Night in Paris. Yes, she thinks it's romantic to trade sex for money, and to fall in love with a man who also has a history of making money off of his sexual escapades. (Access Hollywood says the couple has gotten a marriage license in Vegas.) Way to set an example for your kids, Pam! So, stay tuned for 1 Night in Pamela and remember -- there's always someone dumb or troubled enough to make cinema's far-fetched stories a reality.

Borat went through a lot to woo the buxom Pamela Anderson. He travelled across the country, leaving a wake of angry bystanders, all to come face-to-face with his new-found love, the Baywatch lady herself. He survived rodeo-loving Patriots, passionate Chris tians and even drunken frat boys. Now, after all of that struggle, he has a shot at the jackpot! The crazy Kazakhstanian is rumored to have been the wedge between Anderson and Kid Rock.

As the story goes, the couple went to a private screening of Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan by Ron Meyer. This was the first time that Rock had seen the movie, and to say he was displeased would be a massive understatement. Insiders told The New York Post that Kid berated his wife for her participation in the film. Pamela, who was apparently in on the gag from the beginning, found her night dashed by her new husband's reaction. Shocked that she would participate with Sacha Baron Cohen in the film, he reportedly called her a whore and slut for doing so. Since the outburst, the romance between the couple has cooled and now they're getting divorced.

Come on, Kid Rock -- if reports are true, you are one very strange man. You marry a woman who has made a name for herself as a sexual icon, one who has had her sexual life exploited at every turn, both by herself and by others, yet you call her sexually offensive names for being an object of attraction in a ludicrous comedy fuelled by social commentary? Because she chose to have fun with the name she made for herself? Bah!

[via CBS ShowBuzz]

Lately things have become super-charged with the paparazzi. While there are always stories detailing celebs getting angry with the flashing lights of insistent cameras, the last few weeks have taken a new turn. Instead of a rouged cheek, Madonna is sporting a large bruise. Lindsay Lohan's friends fear she'll be the next Princess Diana. And now, Denise Richards is a talented laptop hurler.

Richards is currently in Vancouver filming Blonde and Blonder, what seems to be a dumb blonde version of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. The IMDB synopsis claims the duo (played by Denise Richards and Pamela Anderson) will have the "smarts" from Legally Blonde, but somehow, I doubt it! Anyway, the movie was filming at the River Rock Casino when Richards spotted two unauthorized photographers and approached them. The three argued, and their two laptops were thrown off the balcony they were standing on. Unfortunately, the flying computer projectiles struck two older women – at 89 and 91 years of age!

The women somehow escaped serious injury, and at this time, do not have plans to press charges. As for the altercating trio, that remains to be seen. As the RCMP (Royal Canadian Mounted Police) investigate, the players in the debacle are providing the usual he said/she said. The photographers say the altercation was not provoked, and Richard's publicist says the opposite.

Many of us love a little gossip now and then. But where is the line? Just how much responsibility should celebrities assume for going into this line of work, and when does the responsibility transfer to the eager photographers?

Pamela Anderson is stripping, and this time it's for charity! To help promote PETA, the Baywatch star has agreed to pose naked in Stella McCartney's London shop window. I have full confidence in Anderson's ability to flaunt her "anti-fur" position, but I'm not so sure how this stunt will translate into the better treatment of animals.  Believe it or not, it isn't fifteen year old boys who are driving the demand for mink gilets (although there was that one episode of Growing up Gotti where Carmine buys a fur coat). The only conceivable effect Pam's performance will have on the moneyed grannies of Britain is if her indecency drives them to swath her in their fox wraps -- and how adorable would a well placed paw pasty look?   

Keanu Reeves doesn't like computers. The Lake House star prefers to send his friends hand written letters instead of typing up a few quick e-mails. This revelation came just in time for the promotion of his new movie about a man who leaves love notes for a woman living in another time period. And just last month Keanu voiced his distaste for police states while promoting A Scanner Darkly, a movie about the evils of police states. I'm just going to go ahead and assume that Keanu's favorite type of time travel happens in a phone booth, he wishes all FBI agents could surf and thinks that long, black, creepy cape-coats are excellent! 

Kate Beckinsale is no floozy! The British star, who is set to release her new comedy Click co-starring Adam Sandler, said that she was surprised and hurt by the tabloid reaction to her marriage to Underworld director, Len Wiseman, after she split with her long-time boyfriend Michael Sheen. Beckinsale insists that she is quite conservative and wondered whether "you can find another actress in this town who's slept with only two people in a decade."  On that note, I would like to nominate Marie Osmond and the old lady from Titanic as two possible contenders. 

• Notable among American films debuting in foreign territories this weekend are The Pink Panther, bowing on hundreds of screen across France, Germany, and Australia, and The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, which is moving on to China after a tremendously successful release in Japan. Poor Tristan Isolde, meanwhile, will stagger into Spain and New Zealand, hoping that somewhere on earth, people won't have heard how bad it is.

• Catalina Sandino Moreno, an Oscar nominee for Maria Full of Grace, will lead an multi-national cast in The Heart Of The Earth, a Spanish-UK-Portugal co-production set to begin shooting in Spain and Portugal later this month. The story is yet another of those inspired-by-real-events, this one about an uprising at a British-owned silver mine in 18th century Spain. Among Moreno's costars will be Brits Sienna Guillory and Hugh Dancy, as well as Cuba's Jorge Perugorría.

• One of the increasingly rare children's book adaptation not being done by Walden Media is Aussie Unjoo Moon's version of The Wicked, Wicked Ladies In The Haunted House. Written by Pulitzer-winner Mary Close, the book, aimed at a grade-school audience, is "a suspenseful ghost story cum mystery in moody, atmospheric prose that blends dark magic and a dry wit occasionally reminiscent of Roald Dahl." Moon hopes that the film will be shot by Oscar winning Memoirs of a Geisha lensman Dion Beebe, to whom she happens to be married.

• Canada's own Walk of Fame is exploding with stars: it was announced recently that Pamela Anderson, Brendan Fraser, Eugene Levy and Robert Goulet are 2006's honorees, and will be inducted at a June ceremony. Surely Eugene Levey never imagined he's be lucky enough to one day share a stage with both Pam Anderson AND Robert Goulet.
  

Would you like to hear something even more demented than the fact that there is going to be a Baywatch movie? Yes? Said movie is supposedly going to be directed and co-produced by Eli Roth. Yes, you heard me right: splatter/gore/horror wonderboy Eli Roth is going to direct a movie about boobs, sun, and "crime-fighting lifeguards." Honestly. This is so odd that I have already checked the calendar three times to confirm that it is not, in fact, April Fool's Day - and, since it's not, I suppose we'll have to accept that it's really happening.

According to Roth, the movie is going to feature "a new crop of hotties" (oh, joy), but will also include a cameo from legendary boob lifeguard Pamela Anderson. Thank goodness for that. As far as the plot is concerned, David Hasselhoff (who appears to be somehow involved - despite saying last spring that he wouldn't be) says it's going to totally rock. No, for real. "It will be set in different locations around the world. There will be lifeguards who are also sent on crime-busting sprees." Are you hearing this? "Crime-busting sprees"?! Globe-trotting lifeguards? What, are the world's cops all dead, or something?

Can you stand the anticipation?

Edit: Thanks to Carsten for pointing out the very reassuring update to the original AICN post: Roth is, in fact, producing, but is NOT directing the film. Thanks goodness. Of course, the movie's still happening, so not everything has been resolved - still, it's a step in the right direction.