Primeval Tagged Articles at Cinematical

Maybe it's because they look like they swam with dinosaurs, or maybe it's because they can be found in so many places throughout the world (Africa, Asia, the Americas and Australia), but it seems like everybody's got a crocodile story to tell. Whether it's the crocodile that bit off Captain Hook's hand (Peter Pan), the crocodile backs that James Bond runs across (Live and Let Die) or the giant Asian croc that mysteriously made its way to Maine (Lake Placid), nobody can resist the water-dwelling reptiles. Very helpfully, MJ Simpson has assembled "The Complete Killer Crocodile Filmography," which includes many strange and wonderful-sounding international titles.

Simpson's list includes a half-dozen for 2007, which sounds like five too many. Set in South Africa, Primeval was first out of the gate. It was advertised as "Inspired by the true story of the most prolific serial killer in history," but Scott called it an "amazing three-headed undercooked movie" with "outrageously underwhelming CGI effects." The Australian picture Black Water is also said to be based on true events, but shouldn't have any problems with underwhelming CGI: the filmmakers say they "went to the north of Australia and braved the waters with real live saltwater crocodiles." Their web site includes footage of crocs thrashing about and gnawing on their cameras, and the trailer looks very promising: a man, his wife and his sister-in-law are stranded in a mangrove swamp surrounded by crocodiles when their boat is overturned and their guide goes missing. Sounds like the Open Water formula, but if the filmmakers can deliver 90 minutes of simmering tension, I'd watch it in a skipped heartbeat. Plans are to release it in Australia in November; Grindstone Entertainment Group claimed North American rights, but since they're a direct-to-DVD label (as noted by Ryan), evidently Black Water will be sadly denied exposure on American cinema screens.

[Via Inside Film Magazine]

The teens were dying for something to sink their teeth into this weekend -- sick and tired of all the kids films and award contenders -- and so they rushed out to see Stomp the Yard, subsequently refusing Night at the Museum a fourth straight number one finish. You Got Served 2 (or, should I say, Stomp the Yard) took home a hefty $22 million, while Museum settled for second and $17.1 million. This is the third straight year (Glory Road in 2006 and Coach Carter in 2005) in which a black-themed film has opened number one on Martin Luther King Jr. weekend.

The Pursuit of Happyness ($9.1 million) remained in the hunt, finishing third, and the expansion of Dreamgirls ($8.1 million) to 1,907 theaters helped secure it fourth place. Freedom Writers and its $7.1 million rounded out the top five. It's my belief that marketing hurt the openings of both Alpha Dog ($6.1 million) and Primeval ($6 million). The former couldn't quite find a way to reach out to younger folks with its R rating, and the older crowd appeared to be interested in a little more substance with their drug-fueled entertainment. The latter, well, did not screen for critics -- which meant audiences had to go by those horrific TV spots that were in no way memorable enough to secure a load of ticket sales.

And, while France seems to be scarfing down Arthur and the Invisibles ($4.3 million), it's expansion to 2, 247 theaters still couldn't convince parents to skip another Night at the Museum.

Full numbers after the jump.

Step right up, ladies and gents, and get a peek at the amazing three-headed undercooked movie! It's Primeval, folks, and it's a horror flick, an action movie and an unintentional comedy at the same time! But wait, there's more! Not only is this sad and somewhat sorry excuse for a matinee packing two more genre formulae than it actually needs, but it also hits the screens more than three months before its due date! It's a stompin', chompin' lunatic romp, my friends! Thrill at the unfinished CGI! Shriek at the outrageously silly crocodile footage! Chuckle at the downright ineptitude of the plot holes, the doofy dialogue and the egregious editorial mishaps! Hurry now, moviegoers, because Primeval is sure to vanish from your local multiplex in the time it took you to say "Wow, I've never even heard of this movie!"

And yet, despite all that, I still had a halfway-decent time with the 100-some minutes of Primeval, if only in a campy, kooky cheese-fest sorta way -- but what's a little bit irritating is that the flick has just enough quality components to make you annoyed the movie's not a whole lot better. Then again, you'd have to be a pretty big schlock-lover to be able to locate the few stray nuggets of giddy entertainment buried within such a half-baked movie. But they're in there, believe me.

You think this weekend is light? Next Friday gives us only one new release: that remake of The Hitcher. But this weekend we get a festival-type indie, a giant croc fest and a foot-stompin' dance flick. Expanding from its platform release is Luc Besson's Arthur and the Invisibles, plus we also have a review of Verdict on Auschwitz, a documentary which opens today in NYC.

Alpha Dog (53 positive / 41 negative at RottenTomatoes.com)

Pro: "It's a piece of mainstream entertainment that doesn't require the viewer to disengage the brain to enjoy it." -- Jim Hemphill, Reel.com

Con: "For all of the credibility of the performances (or at least the teens), it all feels like recycled social commentary." -- Sean Axmaker, Seattle Post-Intelligencer

Pro: "Director Nick Cassavetes has a blast with scenes of testosterone-fueled aggression (until it's time to repent), working the subwoofer in a way that'll surely boost DVD sales among boys with bedroom posters of Tony Montana." -- Rob Nelson, Village Voice

Con: "You know you're in trouble when a guy from *NSYNC is the best thing in a movie." -- MaryAnn Johanson, Flick Filosopher

Bonus! "A film that's a tad too long, too drawn-out and too over-the-top." -- Erik Davis, Cinematical

Primeval (Did not screen for press; currently has only a few reviews at RT.com, all negative)

Pro: N/A

Con: "The camera is jolted around so much that it's almost impossible to tell what's going on. That's okay for a movie trailer, but it becomes unwatchable for a full-length feature." -- Kevin Carr, 7M Pictures

Pro: N/A

Con: "Those seeing this movie just for the crocodile might feel let down, and others might be surprised that the movie might have worked just as well or better without it." -- Edward Douglas, ComingSoon.net

Bonus! [Pending; I'm seeing the movie later tonight.]

Stomp the Yard (15 positive / 41 negative at RT.com)

Pro: "By no means great drama, but if you don't feel like cheering half a dozen times, check yourself for low blood pressure." -- Colin Covert, Minneapolis Star-Tribune

Con: "Is it really so hard for filmmakers, and particularly screenwriters, to give us something new in the way of a story?" -- Claudia Puig, USA Today

Pro: "The dance sequences are so exciting, so captivating, so full of life, it's almost possible to forget you've seen this movie a hundred times before." -- Josh Rosenblatt, Austin Chronicle

Con: "A silly bit of teensploitation that presents a world in which there isn't a single problem imaginable that can't be solved by winning the big dance contest in the final reel." -- Peter Sobczynski, eFilmCritic.com

Bonus! "I don't think I would have liked Stomp the Yard half so much in an empty theater or on DVD; it's definitely a film to catch on a weekend night with a big crowd." -- Jette Kernion, Cinematical

The Review Roundup will be taking next Friday off, partially because it's Sundance season, but mainly because (like I said) The Hitcher is allllll we're getting next weekend.

With very little in the way of publicity or announcements, Disney Buena Vista Touchstone Hollywood Pictures has decided to bump their horror flick Primeval from April to January 12. Yep, next weekend! I'm guessing they decided to jam their murder thriller into the early-year horror slot that was going to go to either Hostel: Part 2 or White Noise 2: The Light, but both of those flicks bailed for later release dates.

No word yet on if Primeval will be screening for the press, but I'm not holding my breath, and that kinda sucks because A) I'm scheduled to review it, and B) I'm kinda looking forward to seeing it. It's about an American news team who travels to South Africa to get the scoop on "the world's most prolific serial killer," which seems like a specious designation when you realize who the killer actually is ... but I don't want to spoil the fun. (Check out a new pair of TV spots right here.)

Written by Michael Ferris and John Broncato (The Game, Terminator 3, Catwoman), Primeval comes from veteran TV director Michael Katelman, and it stars the likes of Dominic Purcell, Orlando Jones, Brooke Langton and Jurgen Prochnow. Special note for the horror freekz: Primeval has been rated R for "strong graphic violence, brutality, terror and language." Cool.

Gotta give it up to the trailer-makers this time out. On the surface this brand-new trailer for a horror flick called Primeval looks like your typical Carnage & Chaos clip, but I think the promo does a pretty slick job of piquing the curioisity. As in ... so, like, who (or WHAT) is this legendary serial killer who's killed over 300 people while never getting caught? Who???

OK, so it's not exactly rocket science, but it's nice to see a little ambiguity and creativity in a horror flick trailer. Consider me suitably intrigued by Primeval, which stars Dominic Purcell, Brooke Langton and Orlando Jones. The director is longtime TV helmer Michael Katleman and the screenwriters are Brancato & Ferris, also known as the guys who wrote The Game, Terminator 3 and ... Catwoman.

Plus it looks like Primeval is set to become one half of a "competing projects" story, kinda like what happened with Deep Impact vs. Armageddon, Dante's Peak vs. Volcano or A Bug's Life vs. Antz. But if I told you the title of Primeval's direct competition, that would spoil the mystery laid down in the trailer! (OK fine, if you must know, click here.)

Anyway, the flick looks like it could be pretty spooky / icky / gory, so I'm down. Then again it could be Anaconda 3, right? We won't get to find out until April 13.

I'm not entirely convinced the world was waiting with bated breath for the upcoming horror film Primeval, but it looks like the movie is on it's way. Back in February, Martha Fischer gave us the heads up on this crowning achievement of storytelling about a news team, some warlords, and a killer crocodile named Gustave. It just goes downhill from there, really, I'm speechless. The flick seemed tailor-made to die a quiet death and make its way to its rightful place in the DVD bargain bin, but it looks like that is not to be.

Ain't it Cool news has the first look at the poster for the upcoming horror flick starring Dominic Purcell of Prison Break fame and Orlando Jones. Noticeably absent from the poster are any images of crocodiles or warlords, but it does have a boatload of skulls, so at least they seem to be promising some carnage. Other than a double bill with Dimension Film's upcoming crocodile flick Rogue, I can't imagine what Touchstone was thinking when they put this one into production. You never know, it might be a surprise hit -- but then again, it is about a killer crocodile named Gustave, so I wouldn't count on it.

Though you may have managed to make it until today without hearing the news, I feel compelled to tell you that a movie about a giant, killer crocodile is currently filming in Australia. It's called Rogue and, while it surely will never approach the awesomeness that was Anaconda (the former's tragic lack of Ice Cube assures that), it nevertheless is very likely to be crappy, campy goodness. In fact, Touchstone Pictures is so incredibly excited about the idea of oversized, deadly crocs that they're going to make their own damn movie about them.

Primeval, Touchstone's newly-announced project, tells the heart-warming story of "a news producer, reporter and cameraman who travel to South Africa on an assignment to bring back alive a 25-foot croc named Gustave." Yes, you read that right: his name is Gustave. Apparently the team is shocked that the creature would rather snack on humans than hang out with them, and things get even worse when (get this) "a feared warlord targets them for death." Warlords? A deadly crocodile named Gustave? Screw Rogue, man, Primeval is where it's at!

The movie, which will star Orlando Jones and Dominic Purcell, will begin shooting in South Africa in April. There's no word yet on who will play Gustav.