Love Iron Man? Hate cancer? Have a lot of money? (I knew that third one would be the toughie.) If you can answer YES to all three questions, then you just might stand a chance of walking through a scene in Marvel's Iron Man 2. Seems that the Stand Up to Cancer organization (you've probably seen their promo at the movies) is auctioning off one HELL of a slick Iron Man 2 package. And here's what the winner shall receive:

A visit to the set (complete with photo tour), a meet & greet with cast and crew members, a "walk-on / extra" role in the sequel, and two tickets to the world premiere of Iron Man 2. And you'll even get to walk down the red carpet at the world premiere, completely geeked out and feeling justifiably heroic because YOU donated the biggest chunk of change to a powerful new cancer research foundation. It all sounds so great ... but who knows how much this package will go for?

You can see the full details over at ComicsPriceGuide.com, and then you can check out the eBay auction page right here. (As of September 7 the bidding stands at $5,100.) Anyone want to lay a friendly bet on how high this auction will go?

(Thanks to my pal Ed and his Marvel Movies! Facebook page for this win-win news item. To the eventual winner, I say this: Well done, sir. Or madam. Well done.)

Everyone I talk to is disappointed with the way the Oscars turned out. Everyone either complains that they were too boring or that there were too many train wrecks on the red carpet. I have one friend who was dissing what the woman who was up for most original song was wearing. A composer? You're dissing a composer? That's not fair. That person never meant to be seen by mllions of people. So I don't know if I've gone soft. or if the last few awards shows have been soooo bad that my standards have been lowered, but I actually enjoyed the Oscars.

But before I go into who I liked and why (and on the subject of what's fair) I want to talk about something I think might have a profound impact on Hollywood if it were implemented. I want to suggest that the person responsible for the outfit stand on the carpet next to the outfit ... now if the celebrities chose to go out on a limb and dress themselves then they should stand alone (like criminals choosing to represent themselves in court), but in most cases I think the stylists should stand up and take the claim or blame for what they have created. And knowing a lot of stylists personally, I can tell you that what you will find is two things: 1) hopefully being held responsible will cause that person to do their job objectively and maybe produce less train wrecks on the red carpet and 2) that most stylists don't know how to dress themselves. It would really be interesting. And then that is who we should talk to when we talk about what their celebrity is wearing. Can you imagine?

[To Jennifer Hudson's stylist] "So what did you choose to put Jennifer in tonight, one of the biggest nights of her life ... the apex of her Cinderella story ... the crowning event that should change her career path and life forever?"
[Stylist] Well I went to the floor at Macy's and picked up a turd brown dress by Oscar De La Renta with pockets in it.
[Interviewer] Why turd brown?
[Stylist] We like earth tones
[Interviewer] Why the pockets?
[Stylist] Not sure ... I thought Jennifer might need a practical place to keep her acceptance speech. Or maybe a pen to sign autographs with. Or gum, or credit cards, or something. What if her hands get cold?
[Interviewer] OK ... good looking out (wink) And what is she wearing on top? Is that a silver or gold python cropped mini jacket/shrug that doesn't seem to fit?
[Stylist] Yes, well ... we wanted Ms. Hudson to have some edge and glamour ... you know ... be current, and push the fashion envelope a little.
[Interviewer] Hmm .... it looks like something from the Jetsons cartoon
[Stylist] I see your point....well look at animation today ... the Jetsons were ahead of their time.
[Interviewer] The proportion is all wrong, the fabrication is cheap, and I think that matching it with that brown dress is a bad idea.
[Stylist] Well she can take it off when she gets inside.

I guess because I'm not a dedicated Hugh Grant fan I don't quite understand the impulse to handcuff myself to him. It might not have been the actions of an overzealous fan, but that's what happened to the star at the Dutch premiere of the romantic comedy Music and Lyrics with Drew Barrymore. Hollywood.com reported that Dutch TV personality Cielke Sijben from 101 TV approached Grant as he walked the red carpet at the Amsterdam Pathé theatre and without saying a word, calmly shackled herself to him. It is assumed that Sijben was performing a prank for a show for the network but that didn't make the incident any less bizarre for those nearby.

An onlooker at the event commented, "It was incredible. She appeared from nowhere and Grant couldn't believe it was happening." Police later arrested Sijben, but not before Grant had to stand attached to her for almost ten minutes before fire fighters could arrive to cut the handcuffs. Grant said nothing while waiting to be freed, but as soon as the cuffs were off he went back to working the press line alongside co-star Drew Barrymore. After Grant had fulfilled his publicity obligations he was described as seeming to be "relieved when he disappeared into the theatre--she could have been a maniac." Not to mention that the sensation of wearing handcuffs probably brought back some unpleasant memories.

Don't forget, kids, – because I'm absolutely insane, I'm forcing Martha and Erik to help me live blog the Golden Globes tonight. You can start your evening over at TV Squad where, starting at about 6pm, Bob Sassone will be blogging the red carpet arrivals. Then, swing back on over here for marathon coverage. And, of course, don't forget to snark to your hearts content in the comments.