Last week I was rather formal with my inaugural installment of "The Exhibitionist." So, now, let me introduce it properly: this is a new column devoted to movie theaters and why they're still worth your time and money. This is also a place to discuss the movie-going experience, with detailed stories and observations, in addition to being a discussion of the theater industry. Sometimes it will be a rant about what needs changing; other times it will be a recognition of great ideas already in place -- such as last week's comparative look at two examples of incentive opportunities. Hopefully "The Exhibitionist" will also generate more discussion from you, the reader; feel free to tell me what needs to be examined or why you think my suggestions are bad by using this as your own outlet for better solutions.

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, let me get to the topic you all seem to be most interested in: movie theater etiquette. Everyone has their complaints about why the movie-going experience is so terrible these days and about how much of it has to do with the behavior of the rest of the audience. But I don't need to go into a list of things that are wrong about our fellow moviegoers. Nor do I need to list the proper etiquette that should be followed when one goes to the movies. Instead, I'd like to offer up the notion that this etiquette stuff is a bunch of baloney. Personally I think many of our complaints are unfounded and worthless.

First of all, the things we complain about are for the most part nothing new. Take the problem with talkers, for instance. I asked a number of people this week about the earliest experience they had with such an annoyance, and plenty responses included incidents that occurred as early as the ' 60s. And I'm sure that's only because I didn't talk to people old enough to relate anything prior to that time. One person did tip me off to an example in print: In Renata Adler's review of 2001: A Space Odyssey for the New York Times, she pointed out that, "the uncompromising slowness of the movie makes it hard to sit through without talking-and people on all sides when I saw it were talking almost throughout the film. Very annoying."

Don't you hate it when you're watching a movie and the sound gets funky or the picture gets blurry? How about when that pack of 14-year-olds in the back row won't stop hootin' and hollerin' because Jimmy finally asked Jenny to the soph hop when like everyone was sure he really liked Janey? Ooh, or even worse: When your view of the movie is being obstructed by someone illegally videotaping Norbit into his Handycam?

If any of those things bug you, you might want to join Regal Cinema's "Crown Club," because, as we recently told you about, it sure looks like some of those members will soon have access to RGRS: Regal Guest Response System. (Dun dun dunnnnn!) It's a little pager thingie that has four buttons on it: Sound, Picture, Piracy and Other Disturbance. Basically if any of these things occur during the movie, you're able to push the appropriate button and get some results. (I find it kind of hilarious to think you'd need more than one button for this doo-hickey. How about a single button that says "Manager Come Here.")

Over a hundred of Regal's locations will offer the tattle-tale gizmo, but I bet they get rid of the equipment real fast after getting 130 buzzes per screening. Lord knows I'd lean on the button every time some open-mouthed popcorn chomper reached down to shake the ice out of his empty soda so he could gnaw on the cubes like some kind of cro-magnon mongoloid. I'm digressing. Points to Regal for trying to combat the in-theater irritations. Might I also suggest an "adult swim" screening once a weekend? No one under 18 admitted to any theaters at all.

So, what about you -- will you be willing to rat on your fellow movie-goer if they talk too loudly or do something else to cause annoyance during the film?

This week Reuters has been holding a media summit in New York City, and many entertainment industry executives have not only been participating, they've been delivering some enjoyable quotes. Of particular interest to Cinematical are the statements from Regal Entertainment CEO Michael Campbell and Blockbuster CEO John Antioco. Campbell discussed the ever-threatening release window shrinkage, which he says he will continue to battle with strong measures. He claims that studios are okay to move up DVD releases for films that don't perform well at the box office, but he stands firm against even small distributors who wish to put out DVDs within eight weeks of their theatrical release. He won't give a minimum for acceptance regarding the window's time-frame, but he urges the film industry to recognize the importance of theatrical exhibition to the success of their product. Campbell also used the summit to announce that Regal has had success with their Guest Response System pagers, which are providing a solution to all the "physical battles" involving assaults with "bats, knives and guns" against cellphone users, and hopes to have them in theaters nationwide next year.

As far as the video rental business goes, Antioco said that it is a business that has reached a plateau, but is still the preferred way for consumers to see films. He is also quoted as saying that, "packaged media remains king for a long time." He claims that Blockbuster is not interested in fighting the digital alternatives (such as movie downloading), and says that it is a business they will need to be in, "for competitive reasons and for consumer reasons, to have a full-service brand." His company hasn't decided on a format for their planned download service, which might be provided through cable or satellite TV rather than computers, and they aren't ruling out any possibilities. On the subject of Blockbuster's rivalry with Netflix and the battle for the online rental market, Antioco says that, "if (Netflix CEO) Reed Hastings thinks he is going to be alone in it, I don't think he is correct."