Having finished his porno, Seth Rogen is now getting ready for that mall cop movie I told you about back in March, Observe and Report. The actor will star as Ronnie Barnhardt, "a deluded, self-important head of mall security who squares off in a turf war against the local cops." This is a whole different project than Mall Cop, which has Kevin James facing a collection of thieves, and that makes it all the better.

The Hollywood Reporter now posts that Rogen will be joined by Anna Faris, Michael Pena, Jesse Plemons, and Ray Liotta. Faris gets to play a salesgirl at the mall that Ronnie lusts after, while Pena gets to put aside some of his meaty roles in films like Crash and Lions for Lambs and get funny as Ronnie's right-hand security man, and Plemons plays another mall guard. Liotta, meanwhile, will play Ronnie's nemesis, a police detective. There is, however, no word who will be fighting with the cop on his side of the turf war.

Even though there is no La Fours in sight, nor any flying fatasses, I think this, along with Zack and Miri, will be good for Rogen's career. Whether Judd Apatow continues his reign of comedy or not, Rogen should have a healthy selection of non-Judd work. That being said, I wouldn't be surprised if this film has at least a few brief cameos by some of Rogen's previous co-stars. Production begins this week.

Why We Can't Wait to See It: It's a fresh, yet classic stoner story written by Seth Rogen, Judd Apatow, and Evan Goldberg. The trailer looks funnier than hell, there's 227 references, and Huey frickin' Lewis wrote the theme song. Also, Rogen gets to not only fly through the air, but also carry James Franco out of a burning building all action hero-style.

Why It Might Do Well: Between The 40 Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up, and Superbad, Seth Rogen has been comedy gold lately. At the very least, the movie will get the loyal Judd Apatow contingent, along with those curious to see what David Gordon Green can do with comedy.

Why It Might Not Do Well: Aliens land on earth and the world ends. Realistically, it should do quite well, but it won't get as many young girls and action-hungry mens seeing it -- both Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 and Hell Ride open on the same day.

Fun Fact: The chorus of Huey Lewis' theme song for the film: "We got in trouble, we got to get out of here. I've got you, you've got me. We are as high as we can be. That's all right. How did we get into this mess? Pineapple Express!"

Trivia:



Answer Key

One of my favorite bloggers, Jim Emerson, gives Hollywood Elsewhere's Jeff Wells a virtual bitchslap for a recent post Wells made on his favorite topic: how he doesn't believe guys who look "normal" (i.e., to him, fat and ugly) really score with beautiful women. In a post last month titled "Eclipse of the Hunk," Wells starts off by talking about the opening of the Judd Apatow-produced Forgetting Sarah Marshall, then goes on to mourn the loss of sexy, buff leading men and the success of Judd Apatow's films, in which dorky guys like Seth Rogen and Jason Segel get the hot chicks. Emerson excerpts my favorite quote from Wells piece:

"Taking their place are guys who look like real guys, which means almost never slender or buffed, and frequently chunky, overweight or obese. And usually with roundish faces with half-hearted beard growth, hair on their backs, man-boobs with tit hairs, blemishes, and always horribly dressed -- open-collared plaid dress shirts, low-thread-count T-shirts with lame-ass slogans or promotions on the chest, long shorts and sandals (or flip-flops), monkey feet, unpedicured toenails."

While I'm not willing to go into too many details about my personal habits, I will say that I do have an affinity for the so-called 'stoner movie' (well, at least the ones that try to portray smokers with just a modicum of reality). So with that in mind, you can guess why I am looking forward to the release of Pineapple Express -- the first poster of which has just hit the interwebs (check out the full size in the gallery below).

Seth Rogen stars as Dale Denton, a perpetually baked process server with a close relationship to his dealer, Saul (as played by James Franco). When Dale accidentally witnesses a murder, he and Saul are forced on the run from bad guys while suffering from the mother of all paranoid freak outs. Rosie Perez also stars as a crooked cop, and Gary Cole (aka Bill Lumbergh) as a drug lord.

Drillbit Taylor, a comedy about three youths who hire a "bodyguard" to protect them from school bullies, may be produced by Judd Apatow (Knocked Up, The 40-Year-Old Virgin), but it doesn't really fit into the Apatow filmography of manic modern comedies. It feels like it belongs to a different continuum of film -- the lazy-yet-agreeable teen comedies of the '80s, where a simple hook gets festooned and garlanded with bits of business and digressions. That's not surprising, considering that one of the credited writers is that '80s comedy titan of teen John Hughes, shielded behind a pseudonym. It's not wholly retro -- the off-kilter, lazy charm of Owen Wilson in the lead role feels too modern for that -- but it also feels like a film we've seen many times before in form and flavor, and while it may not be consistently brilliant or laugh-out-loud funny all the way through, it is at the least consistently amusing.

Wade (Nate Hartley) and Ryan (Troy Gentile) are just entering high school; they're eager to move to the next phase of their lives. Wade is slight, bespectacled and intrinsically decent; Ryan is a beefy, big-boned boy, funny and outgoing. (Comparisons to Michael Cera and Jonah Hill in Superbad are not undeserved; Superbad co-writer Seth Rogen is credited here alongside Kristofor Brown, working from a story by John Hughes -- here credited as, in a shout-out to English majors nationwide, Edmond Dantes.) They're both looking forward to the opportunities for social re-invention their new environment offers: Ryan tells Wade "I don't want you to call me Ryan; call me T-Dog." But when minuscule, nervy, nerdy classmate Emmit (David Dorfman) is being shoved into a locker, Wade does the ethically right but tactically wrong thing of speaking up, and thereby places himself and Ryan on the radar of snake-eyed sociopathic school bully Filkins (Alex Frost) and his partner-in-thuggery Ronnie (Josh Peck).

Finally, after all of the waiting, Moviefone has the trailer for The Pineapple Express, which you can watch above (or over there in glorious HD)! And man, it's been worth the anxious wait, even if there's no Huey Lewis to be heard. Under the directorial eye of David Gordon Green, Seth Rogen and James Franco are two pot smoking friends who get in over their heads when Rogen witnesses a cop murder someone. Of course, the only thing to do is go straight to the pot-dealing Franco.

Rogen is, well, Rogen, although he's got one heck of a flying through the air moment that was just completely brilliant, and has me waiting for Seth to take on a buddy cop movie. Franco, meanwhile, is just excellent. Really -- after pushing the boundaries of annoyance with Spidey, he's just stoner greatness. And, it's nice to see Rosie Perez getting down with her bad self.

Watch out for the barracudas!

(Fun Fact: A little birdie out at SXSW told us that, originally, Rogen was supposed to play the stoner and Franco the straight guy. However, Judd Apatow wanted to take a risk and flipped the roles before filming began.)

The best family films aren't only for the kids; they look like a kiddie package but pack enough of an adult punch to make everyone happy. It looks like Monsters vs. Aliens might be just that. It is, and I quote from the new goodie extravaganza over at USA Today, "a throwback to those B-movie glory days of the '50s when Martians invaded our backyards and rubber monsters stalked the Earth."

This even includes specific references, such as the heroine Susan Murphy. She's a regular California girl who gets hit by a meteor and becomes 49' 11" tall (Attack of the 50-Foot Woman!), gets taken by the military, and renamed Ginormica. She's also being voiced by Reese Witherspoon. But that's not the only big name attached -- Rainn Wilson will handle the evil alien Gallaxhar, and Ginormica will be joined by Dr. Cockroach, Ph.D. voiced by Hugh Laurie, jelly-like B.O.B. handled by Seth Rogen, and the half-ape/half-fish Missing Link voiced by Will Arnett. Plus, there's Kiefer Sutherland as the aptly-named Gen. W.R. Monger and Stephen Colbert as the "plays it on steroids" president. (Some of them you can spot in the pic on the right, which you can see full-size at USA Today.)

But there's also a twist in this. Since the feature will be the first CG movie shot in 3-D, rather than converted to it, it has an extra $15 mil added to its budget, which will find its way out of fans' wallets. The tickets will cost more, although the price hasn't been determined. Jeffrey Katzenberg is hoping we'll all pay for "a premium experience." This sounds cool and all, but paying more for this movie sounds silly, esp. if it ends up killing at the box office. What do you think about this monetary twist?

Recently, I watched the old Judd Apatow series Undeclared. It was both a blast from the past and a reminder that Adam Sandler used to be pretty darned popular. He gets knocked a lot these days; but really, he is still around and kicking. However, the big question is: What happens when you team him up with the super-popular Apatow? They're already testing that question with the upcoming Don't Mess with the Zohan, and now Variety reports that the two are teaming up again.

This time, Apatow has written a currently untitled comedy that will star Sandler, Seth Rogen, and Leslie Mann, and will be a co-project between Universal and Sony. While production is set to begin later this year, Judd is keeping the plot under wraps. Argh! That's so annoying.

Since we can't talk about what the movie will be about, other than to muse about what sort of movie would require that trio, what do you think about this Sandler/Apatow pairing? At the very least, it looks like Sandler is now one of Apatow's talent pool.

Like dueling asteroids and meteors, like competing Truman Capotes, two separate comedies about the world of mall security are moving forward. And The Hollywood Reporter today gave word that the Kevin James comedy Mall Cop -- not, of course, to be confused with the just-announced Seth Rogen film Observe and Report -- is moving forward with casting. Epic Movie "star" Jayma Mays (who the keen-eyed among you will also recognize from Ugly Betty, Heroes and Pushing Daisies) will be playing James' love interest, while Keir O'Donnell (Wedding Crashers) will be playing a fellow security officer. (The Hollywood Reporter piece also contains spoilers, so those of you who wish to have your enjoyment of Kevin James unsullied by too much information may wish to be cautious about clicking through).

Of course, just as with Armageddon versus Deep Impact or Capote versus Infamous, the final arbiter of victory for Mall Cop and Observe and Report will be the audience -- so which are you more interested in seeing? James, or Rogen? Or will your inner polyester-clad authority figure split the difference and compel you to see both? And finally, heretical as it is to apply historical perspective to big-concept comedies, didn't Martin Lawrence and Steve Zahn already make this movie?

He's currently filming a porno with Elizabeth Banks, and you'd think it would be pretty hard to top that. Well, Seth Rogen has found his next picture, and it has him joining the dangerous, fast-paced world of mall security. Variety reports that Rogen will star in the upcoming comedy Observe and Report, written by Jody Hill. Being a mall cop might sound a little bland after the world of triple-X, but this project has got a bit of a twist to it.

Rogen will play Ronnie Barnhardt -- "a deluded, self-important head of mall security who squares off in a turf war against the local cops." It's not every day that mall security ends in turf wars. However, this is one case where there will be a bit of a battle off-screen. You might remember that Kevin James has his own flick on the way called Mall Cop.

Personally, I think this is an easy choice. Some kidlets and PG-lovers will head right over to James' version, where thieves take over his mall. But really, would you want that if you could have a mall turf war? One with Seth Rogen? Production gears up next month after Zack & Miri wraps.

I guess hearing musical numbers about different celebrities f**king each other is going to be all the rage for the next little while. On the heels of the highly successful Sarah Silverman/Matt Damon gag, and the only slightly less funny revenge song courtesy of Silverman's boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel and Ben Affleck, comes a contribution from Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks from the set of Zack and Miri make a Porno (courtesy of Quick Stop Entertainment)

It's pretty much the same jokes as the other two videos but with one notable difference; this time there is not a 'bleep' to be heard. Honestly, maybe that's what's missing; sometimes a well-placed bleep can almost be funnier than the naughty word itself. But, this is marketing for a Kevin Smith movie after all, so get ready for some truly crude lyrics; funny, but kind of gross. As for the cameos? Don't go looking for any A-listers in this video, but Jason Mewes, Traci Lords and Craig Robinson all make a brief appearance (but I guess they kind of had too since they are in the movie after all).

Smith and company are still shooting the romantic comedy about two childhood friends who get into the porn business. Rehearsal finished back in January and now Smith has begun shooting on location in *Chicago. Zack and Miri make a Porno is scheduled for release later this year. As for this 'I'm F**cking ____", craze, I can only image who might come up with one next? Hilary Clinton is f**king Obama? Not to mention, it is getting just a little less funny each time -- where is the next 'D**k in a Box' when you really need it?

*Correction: Smith is shooting in Pittsburgh

Considering how much Kevin Smith hates having his surprises spoiled online, he got really lucky with the new on-set photos from his latest comedy, Zack and Miri Make a Porno. Slashfilm is now hosting a couple photos taken on set at a local mall, as well as some shaky camera footage of the man at work. Nothing groundbreaking, but hey, Smith always brings a smile to my face, so I'm not complaining.

Zack and Miri is the story of two childhood friends who are brought together again at their high school reunion. The two then come up with the idea of making a porn flick together. Seth Rogen stars as Zack and Elizabeth Banks plays Miri. Originally the role had been written for Rosario Dawson, but she backed out to work on Eagle Eye with Shia LaBeouf.

Rehearsals for the film started back in January, and judging by Smith's posting on his personal blog, things seem to be going well. Smith wrote that, "I've got a guy whose inflections I wrote for/to reading the scenes and sounding like he's not acting at all, as much as being the character. I've got a chick who could read the Bible aloud and make it seem charming. They're naturals. They're excellent". OK, so Smith has never been known to be less than totally committed to his films for better or for worse. Luckily, it looks like this one is going to be one of the better ones. Zack and Miri Make a Porno is scheduled for release later this year.

As much as I like Judd Apatow, there is just something that isn't doing it for me when it comes to Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Luckily, it looks like the new Red Band trailer just released on Empire will help those of you out there like me who just are not completely sold on the romantic comedy. It's nothing I can put my finger on, but I think most audiences will be sold on the "Apatow Brand" more than anything else.

Marshall stars Jason Segel (How I Met Your Mother) as Peter Bretter; a lovelorn guy who has just been dumped by his newly-successful girlfriend (as played by TV's Kristen Bell). When advised to take a vacation by his friends, he runs into his ex and her new rock-star boyfriend. Mila Kunis (That 70's Show) also co-stars as the fun-loving girl who helps Peter over his heartache. Along with the first-timer's, some of the usual Apaptow crew are there including Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd, and Bill Heder.

Erik had brought us the first trailer back in December, and the new red band version contains a lot of the same jokes. So while it doesn't include much new footage, at least this time they don't have to worry about those pesky FCC rules and they can show you the jokes in their entirety -- and believe me when I tell you that they are way funnier when they don't have to worry about offending people in the prime-time hour. Forgetting Sarah Marshall (with all the crudeness intact) will arrive in theaters on April 18, 2008.

The best movie year since 1999, 2007 offered a staggering bounty of cinematic delights. I keep track of all the movies I see in a given year and give each a letter grade, "A" through "F". Usually my Top Ten list consists of all of the "A's" and a few "B's." This year, "A" pictures made up my top twenty. With so many great films, I won't wallow through a "Worst of the Year" list, I'll simply present you with a few that didn't fully satisfy:

The Biggest Disappointment: The Darjeeling Limited -- A Louis Vuitton commercial stretched to feature length. The Darjeeling Limited is a perfect title for the film because it makes plain what a limited filmmaker the once great Wes Anderson has become. Hey Wes, people running in slow-motion while a Kinks song plays is always going to look pretty neat. But if there's absolutely nothing else going on in the scene, then that's all it is -- people running in slow-motion while a Kinks song plays. We all think it's really cool that you like The Kinks. Hell, I love those guys! The Rolling Stones are awesome, too! But I wouldn't ask them to do my job for me.

and...

The Biggest Question Mark: There Will Be Blood

Undoubtedly one of the year's most impressive technical achievements, There Will Be Blood is frequently stunning. It's so stunning, in fact, that it's easy to overlook how infuriatingly empty it all is. The film focuses on two main characters, and neither one changes a lick in thirty years and 158 minutes. How did Paul Thomas Anderson, creator of such deeply emotional rides as Boogie Nights, Magnolia, and Punch Drunk Love come up with a movie completely devoid of human emotion? (I'm not counting greed.) Beautiful, brilliant, and boring in equal doses, I've seen Blood twice, and I still don't know if it's a masterpiece or a mess. I just know I felt...nothing watching it. It's as hollow, as frustrating, as difficult to know as its "hero," Daniel Plainview.

On to my list. First, ten that didn't quite make the cut. Here's #20 through #11: (#20) Breach, (#19) Once, (#18) The Diving Bell and the Butterfly, (#17) Sicko, (#16) Sweeney Todd, (#15) The Lives of Others, (#14) Eastern Promises, (#13) Zodiac, (#12) Atonement, (#11) Before the Devil Knows You're Dead

And my Top Ten is after the jump...

So it's no secret that Steve Carell hasn't always made the best choices when it comes to movie roles. The same could probably be said of some of Jim Carrey's choices as well, so there could be a lot riding on both their reputations for the big-screen adaptation of the classic Dr. Seuss story, Horton Hears a Who!. Erik had brought us the first teaser back in July and now a full feature trailer has been released.

Horton is based on the 1954 children's story about a microscopic world that gains an elephant as their protector. Over the years the story's moral of "a person's a person no matter how small" has been interpreted as a response to the McCarthy anti-communist era and the importance of treating the "least of us" with a little care and respect -- pretty heavy for a kid's book, I know, but it does make me long for the days when children's entertainment had more going for it than tie-in deals. The film stars Carell as the feisty mayor of Whoville and Jim Carrey as their elephant advocate. The film has a solid supporting cast that includes some truly hilarious people; namely Will Arnett, Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, Amy Poehler, and Carol Burnett.

So even if you are not the biggest fan of kid's movies, after watching this trailer, you can't deny this is one snazzy looking movie with some big-name comedic talent. But I guess everyone said the same thing about Bee Movie, and we all know how that turned out. Horton Hears a Who! arrives in theaters on March 14th, 2008.