Last week, Peter Martin mused about the whole Cloverfield phenomenon and whether they should borrow from what Anne Thompson calls the "Blair Witch playbook." We'll find out soon, since we're in the home stretch now and less than two weeks away from the film's release. However, one thing can't be denied. The Cloverfield viral campaign has taken the fake-media BW techniques to huge levels. We've been seeing it for months, and to make it all more encompassing, now there are foreign news bites to check out.

You can check out Spanish, Italian, and German news clips about the collapse of Chaui Station -- a drilling behemoth* in the Atlantic Ocean owned by the company who also owns Slusho. Each news clip has the same recorded video, with different news spins on the piece. My favorite is the Spanish lady, who looks completely unphased by the news and looks like she could be commenting on the latest stock prices or clothing brand. Gotta love stoic correspondence. The newscasters must all be so set on being serious that they don't notice the monster swimming away from the rig, presumably right to New York so he can rip the head off of the Statue of Liberty. One thing is for sure, the dude/dudette is a good swimmer!

Bilingual folks -- go nuts! The clips are after the jump...

*Fixed thanks to Maria, who is better than my crappy spell-checker.

Let's go where no movie marketing has ever gone before ...

Have the first pics of Chris Pine as Captain Kirk arrived online? JFXOnline, who have apparently been camped out around the Star Trek XI set since filming began, claimed to have snapped photos of who they believe is Chris Pine in his Kirk costume. Said costume, in case you were wondering, is all red -- and it kinda looks like the sort of thing Santa would wear under his big, heavy coat. Anyway, the photos, which also include shots of a girl they claim is an Orion Slave Girl (kinky!), are pretty blurry. And JFXOnline insists on throwing up this watermark to block the pics even more. But it's definitely a guy in the pics ... and he's definitely wearing a lot of red. Captain Kirk or some guy doing the Walk of Shame following a holiday party that got way too out of control? You make the call.

So you know all that Cloverfield and Slusho stuff? How a bunch of viral sites pimping this weird Japanese drink called Slusho have popped online, and how we all thought it had something to do with Cloverfield? Yeah, apparently not. Slashfilm tells us that, based on a bunch of early screenings, Slusho doesn't appear anywhere in the film (except on a water bottle or something). Yup. No Slusho in Cloverfield. So if it's not in Cloverfield, then what the hell is Slusho? Well, Slashfilm claims it might be part of another project J.J. Abrams is working on, and that for some odd reason the two got mixed up because a) Bad Robot is involved in both and b) the whole Japanese angle lead lots to believe Slusho had something to do with Godzilla, which, in turn, was believed to be the monster featured in Cloverfield. Yeah ... no. And if that's the case, then why hasn't J.J. Abrams come out and said something by now? Why? Because the guy loves f**king with people. And if we're completely off course, then that means we're nowhere near the stuff he's actually hiding. Bastard. Abrams is like the kid who would hide in the most insane spots during Hide & Seek as a kid. You'd be behind a bush, and he'd find a way to hide on top of a roof somewhere. Cloverfield arrives on January 18.

Don't get me wrong, I love a film that makes me want to drop several tabs of acid, but some of this Cloverfield marketing is a little too odd. Bunch of kids running around Manhattan, trying to escape from a monster? Okay, I get that. This whole Slusho thing? No idea. For those of you following the Cloverfield viral marketing campaign closely, you should already be aware of Slusho. It's some sort of drink that's somehow tied into the movie; it's already appeared in episodes of Heroes (for some odd reason) and now a new commercial for the drink is online. I have no idea what Slusho (whose tagline is: "You Can't Drink Just Six") has to do with Cloverfied, but I imagine the two will join forces when the film finally arrives in theaters on January 18, 2008. Is the Cloverfield monster also going to factor into the Heroes television series? Got me. But I wouldn't put anything past viral marketing guru J.J. Abrams -- he really knows how to suck you in, keep you in and then give you nothing. I kid, I kid. Anyway, check out the new Slusho commercial after the jump. Additionally, according to Shock, Cloverfield's running time will clock in at just around 90 minutes. How long does a tab of acid last?

Almost every day I receive an email from another online movie writer pointing me toward a "hot" story they've written on a "hot" topic. Some of these I decide are worthy of a post, some are not. This evening Devin from CHUD was the latest name to pop into my inbox, and he's got some tasty Halloween treats that I personally think you might want to check out. First off, the first full-length Cloverfield (or 1-18-08, or Untitled J.J. Abrams Mind-F*ck) is said to be arriving on November 16, with a confirmed title, but Devin claims to have seen the trailer (or an earlier version of it) and he's published a full report with all kinds of details. Most notably, he says the trailer ends with the title Cloverfield. Granted, knowing Abrams and his crew, they may not stick a title in until the very last minute. Additionally, even if this is the real title, I wouldn't put it past Abrams to change it once all these reports start cropping up online.

Moving on ... based on the description, the trailer seems pretty cool. Lots of what we've seen before; people running, screaming, military folks, rockets, helicopters, the Statue of Liberty's head on the ground somewhere -- but, finally, it seems we get a tiny glimpse of this monster (or shall I say, group of monsters) that are attacking New York City. According to Devin "...there's footage of army guys running and shadows on a wall. Shadows of a screaming woman being attacked by a small monster (possibly two - either she's being pulled away from the monster by someone behind her or there's another monster behind her). It's confirmed: the movie has a big beast and small ones. Like the American Godzilla." He also adds that we briefly see another, larger monster pass between two buildings, but he couldn't make out the details. So it looks like Abrams and Co. will keep their monsters well hidden until closer to release.

Oh, and if it ends up the flick is called Cloverfield, well, that'd be totally lame. I vote for Super Kick-Ass Monster Movie! But that's me.

It's been awhile, but another mysterious photo has popped up over at 1-18-08.com (aka The Unofficial Official Website for "Cloverfield" -- aka That Mysterious J.J. Abrams Project). I'll admit that I haven't been following the viral marketing for this film since -- I dunno -- July, so I'm not completely up to date on all the different websites beside this one that may or may not have something to do with the movie. But in case you're still following the clues, if you flip the above image over (on their site, not ours), you'll see the recipe for a Japanese dish, in Japanese. You can find the translation over on the Unfiction message boards, as well as more info on the Cloverfield Clues blog.

As far as I know, an official title still hasn't been released, and we're all still assuming the film will be released on January 18, 2008. From the details that have emerged, we know the film will follow a group of kids from New York City who attempt to survive an attack from an unknown monster(s). Oh, and the entire film will most likely be told via shaky handheld cameras, a la The Blair Witch Project. Matt Reeves is directing off a script from Drew Goddard, while folks like Lizzy Caplan, Mike Vogel (who's rumored to be up for the role of Captain Kirk in Abrams' Star Trek XI) and Jessica Lucas star. Not much else to go on, but whatever it is that chef is holding up -- well, it looks disgusting.

Some raw behind-the-scenes footage of Cloverfield has popped up online, and someone says they snapped a photo of the possible teaser poster. All of this ... and Andy Rooney ... on this edition of Unsolved Cloverfield. Cue theme music, raise lights -- and here we are, back again with more Cloverfield nonsense to keep you busy for all of about five minutes. First up, someone has posted a minute or so of video showing Cloverfield shooting a few "everyone run for their lives" scenes over on YouTube. The clips are cut together pretty well, so either this person is a spy who knows how to edit (which wouldn't surprise me in the least considering this is the footage that was shot in Los Angeles), or this person has something to do with the production. Meaning, all of this was leaked on purpose. I guess we'll know soon enough; Paramount loves to go after these sorts of things. Interestingly enough, I saw no cameras present. And that last shot is positioned so well, it definitely leaves me a bit skeptical. But it's Cloverfield (supposedly), and those people are running for a reason.

Apart from this video, some dude named Tom emailed us a tip regarding a cellphone photo the photographer claims is some sort of teaser poster for Cloverfield. It's important to note that in no way do I think this is legit, but I figured I'd toss it out there for you folks to judge as well. The poster itself features the Statue of Liberty without a head, the New York skyline in the distance, the date 1-18-08 in the bottom right-hand corner and the title -- wait for it -- Monstrous. The photo itself is a blurry mess, and the entire thing wreaks of photoshop. Coupled with the fact that the person who shot the pic claims they saw the poster at some sort of collectibles booth probably means there ain't much truth to this. Then again, you never know. Cloverfield/Slusho/Monstrous is due out in theaters on January 18, 2008.

For all those people (myself included) who have spent hours or even days trying to crack the codes included within those two mysterious Cloverfield websites -- EthanHaasWasRight and EthanHaasWasWrong -- I've got two words for you: Stop now. That's because producer J.J. Abrams stopped by AICN and told the fantastical Harry Knowles that those sites have "nothing to do with us" (meaning the film). Yup, I'm not kidding. We've received a ton of emails from folks wondering how we knew in the first place that those sites were linked up to Cloverfield. Well, the short answer is ... we didn't. We were following a rumor that another reliable site had posted -- coupled with the fact that Paramount was removing those Ethan Haas-related videos off YouTube and every other movie blog on the planet was reporting the same stuff, all lead us to believe that what we were looking at was in some way related to Cloverfield (or Slusho).

Interestingly enough, Abrams alludes to the fact that there are more websites out there and we just haven't discovered them yet. He tells AICN: "Regarding the online stuff you posted: yeah, we're doing some fun stuff on the web. But, obviously, if the movie doesn't kick some massive ASS, who gives a rat's about what's online? So as you can imagine, we're focusing mostly on THAT. For what it's worth, the only site of ours that people have even FOUND is the 1-18-08.com site." He doesn't tell us anything else about the film, but I'm glad he showed up to put the kibosh on Ethan Haas once and for all. So now you have a new mission: find those other sites. But beware -- now that this news is out, you know there will be several people out there creating fake sites to throw you off. In the meantime, those of you who missed the official trailer can now check it out over here (in glorious HD). Oh, and if you do stumble across a legit Cloverfield site, don't forget about your friends here at Cinematical. Smiley face.