Fair warning: This is a slight, trivial, and practically meaningless piece of upcoming movie news -- but it touches on three things we love here at Cinematical: Action movies based on cartoons based on ancient marketing campaigns, horny directors, and fake breasts. Here we go:

According to SFGate's Hot Dish blog, sexy actress Sienna Miller was forced to wear fake hooters so as to accentuate her cleavage in the upcoming G.I. Joe movie. Ms. Miller will be playing The Baroness, and apparently her god-given boobies were not adequate in the eyes of director Stephen Sommers. ("'I'm gonna be honest, I like girls with big boobs," is what the director told her. Strange comment from a guy whose leading ladies have been Famke Janssen, Rachel Weisz, and Kate Beckinsale, three gorgeous women who aren't exactly D-cups.)

Ms. Miller notes that she was "mildly offended" by the breast issue, and I'm kind of surprised that the topic didn't come up before her first costume fitting, but hey ... The Baroness is pretty stacked. Perhaps Mr. Sommers is just trying to remain faithful to the source material -- or yeah, maybe he just likes big boobs. Lord knows the target demographic for G.I. Joe loves boobs. Check out images of Sienna as The Baroness in the gallery below.

...after the jump: more pics!

I do believe Ray Park is the first G.I. Joe actor to speak on the new movie -- which fits, as he's the first character the studio allowed us to see. Park gave a big interview to Geekscape! where he discussed Joe, Snake Eyes, Iron Fist, and the finer points of stunts and martial arts.

Park was determined to snag the role of Snake Eyes for himself. "One of the reasons I always wanted to play Snake Eyes is because I played as him when I was a kid. Star Wars fans and the fans I've met at conventions have said 'You'd be the best Snake Eyes ever if they did a GI Joe movie!' So when I heard they were actually going to do it I did everything possible to try and get in a meeting or try and get an audition cause I wanted to do it for myself, I wanted to do it for the fans and I wanted to do it for my cousins and all my nephews and my kids. It's great to be here and to be able to tell those stories."

It is a regular Stephen Sommers reunion on G.I. Joe. Latino Review reports that Brendan Fraser has been cast as Gung Ho, the Cajun gunnery sergeant. But don't get too excited to see Fraser sporting that Village People outfit -- word has it that it's a cameo. He's already finished filming his scene, a training sequence at The Pit.

LR says an offer has also been made to Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson to play Hector Delgado, aka Shipwreck. He hasn't yet accepted, but what red-blooded male is going to turn down a role in G.I. Joe? Despite the difference in ethnicities, the Rock would be a good fit for the popular character -- and he has the right humor to have a pet parrot making wisecracks at him.

You know, as I type this, it occurs to me that for most people, The Rock is probably a bigger name than Fraser these days. I think the latter is on the way to a comeback -- but will he actually stay working this time, or vanish off into the private life again? Perhaps he won't have a choice, the Gung Ho costume may force him into seclusion. As we wait for the Rock to commit, let's speculate on which Sommers veteran we will see next. I think Rachel Weisz is a no go, but surely someone from Van Helsing should appear before too long. What's Richard Roxburgh up to? They better nab him soon, G.I. Joe opens August 7th, 2009.

If you were hankering for more details about the big-screen G.I. Joe, then today is your lucky day, because Hasbro's Brian Goldner is feeling chatty. MTV news spoke with G.I. Joe's executive producer and managed to score some important details about the feature film. Goldner is chief operating officer at Hasbro, and was responsible for releasing Joe back in the 80's to millions of military-minded children everywhere.

First up -- what the filmmakers have in store for main bad guy, Cobra Commander. According to Goldner: "In effect, this is all about the rise of Cobra Commander. ... For fans, they're really going to love this, because we take them on a journey. ... We have to go through the first chapter and then build from there." Rumors currently have Joseph Gordon-Levitt taking over the role of Cobra, but that has yet to be confirmed.

But it's not just about the bad-guys. Goldner also hinted about some new back-story on some of the more familiar characters, including Baroness (played by Sienna Miller) and Destro (Christopher Eccleston). As for the 'rah-rah military' tone of earlier incarnations of Joe, Goldner says that while the original feel, will still be there, we shouldn't start looking for any metaphors about global politics or foreign policy. According to Goldner: "Clearly, the American military is involved, as are other forces. But at the end of the day, the force that matters is the G.I. Joe force, and the Pit, and all the things that relate to that."

Now, what would a G.I. Joe movie be without the toy tie in? Goldner confirmed that Hasbro will revive the 3 and 3/4 inch figures from the 80's. "[That size] gives people a chance to get all the figures but get all of the vehicles. So it's going to be in that scale. ... Very true to where we were in the 1980s, and then we'll take it forward" -- gee I can't wait for my Marlon Wayans figure with kung-fu grip. G.I. Joe is set for release on August 7th, 2009.

Like most people, when news broke that English party girl Sienna Miller had signed to star in Stephen Sommers' big-screen G.I. Joe flick, I was a little surprised at the choice. Usually, when you think female action stars, Miller probably would not be at the top of the list. Luckily, she seems to be taking the part seriously, and in between champagne cocktails at a pre-BAFTA bash, gave the gossip wags at The Sun a little sneak peak into her preparations to play the infamous Baroness. Miller told the press that, "I've started taking boxing lessons, and I've also had to learn how to fire guns with live ammunition. I'm a baddie, running around kicking everyone while wearing tight, thigh-high boots...I'm getting muscles everywhere."

The official synopsis for the film reads: "From the Egyptian desert to deep below the polar ice caps, the elite co-ed GI JOE team, based from its headquarters The Pit, deploys the latest in next-gen spy and military equipment to fight crooked arms dealer Destro and the growing threat of the mysterious COBRA organization from plunging the world into chaos." In the original Joe stories, Baroness was COBRA Organization's intelligence officer. Serving as a lieutenant to Cobra Commander, Baroness was a dark femme fatale type. In both the comics and the cartoons, she had a romantic relationship with Destro. I guess now that a fellow countryman has been cast as Destro, Sommers might be looking to include the romantic sub-plot.

My goodness, it seems like everywhere you turn somebody else is signing up for the big-screen adaptation of G.I. Joe. Variety reports that Dennis Quaid has now signed to star as General Hawk. You know, your typical 'grizzled' military man. He's probably going to have a cigar chomped in his teeth for three-quarters of the film. The news came on the heels of official word that Channing Tatum had been hired to play Duke; the second in command of the elite team with 'kung-fu grip'. Yesterday, Erik had also reported that Arnold Vosloo (The Mummy) will be playing Zartan, but so far there is no official word.

It looks like Quaid is technically one of the biggest name stars in the cast, which includes Marlon Wayans as Ripcord and Sienna Miller as The Baroness. Some of the other 'Joe' characters who will be making an appearance are Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, who will play Heavy Duty, Byung-hun Lee as Storm shadow, Ray Park as Snake Eyes, and Said Taghmaoui as Breaker.

So far, there aren't many details about the plot, but what we do know is that Stuart Beattie's script will focus on "A European-based military unit known as Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity (G.I.J.O.E.), a hi-tech, international force of special operatives that takes on an evil organization led by a notorious arms dealer". There are still a few more spots to fill, but it looks like director Stephen Sommers has almost finished assembling his team. Just in time too, since the film is scheduled to start shooting next month. G.I. Joe is scheduled for release on August 7th, 2009.

UPDATE: IESB now says that David Murray (a theater actor, apparently) has landed the role of Destro in G.I. Joe. Destro is the main villain in the film, and is described as the "faceless power behind Military Armaments Research System, the largest manufacturer of state-of-the-art weaponry."

Well, it looks like we might finally have our next Real American Hero. Ain't it Cool News is reporting that Channing Tatum (star of She's the Man and Step Up) has signed to play Duke in the feature film version of Hasbro's iconic military men, G.I. Joe. News that Tatum was in the running for the part first sprung up on Latino Review, but AICN claims that they now have word that it's a done deal and Tatum will be playing the second in command for Team Joe.

G.I. Joe will be directed by The Mummy's Stephen Sommers, and while some of the details have been tinkered with ever so slightly in Stuart Beattie's script, for the most part it looks like fans will be getting the Joes they know and love. Just last week, some plot spoilers were leaked, so if you can't wait, you can check that out here. So far, the cast includes Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (LOST), Said Taghmaoui (The Kite Runner), Sienna Miller as The Baroness, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Marlon Wayans -- and I don't think I'm alone in thinking that this is one eclectic cast to say the least.

If it's true, this will be a big role for Tatum, who so far has starred in some pretty crappy teen fare. Tatum's career is on an upswing lately, and has the upcoming Iraq drama Stop Loss hitting theaters this year, as well as a role in Michael Mann's Dillinger film, Public Enemies, with Johnny Depp and Christian Bale. G.I. Joe is set to start shooting in Los Angeles in the next month, so we should get some official word soon.

I might not be the biggest G.I. Joe fan out there, but even I am starting to question some of the casting decisions for Paramount's big-screen adaptation. Variety reports that Marlon Wayans of White Chicks fame has signed to play Ripcord in their feature film based on the classic cartoon (nothing against the guy, he was great in Requiem for a Dream, but then again he did star in Little Man). For those of you out there who aren't all that familiar with "the *Greatest American Hero", Ripcord was one of the good guys and was the leader of a paramilitary group. He made his first appearance back in 1985 and was thought of as the "new wave" of recruits after the first round of 'Joes' retired. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is also said to be in negotiations to co-star, though his character is not named.

Mummy director Stephen Sommers will helm the script written by Stuart Beattie. The update of the story now has it set 10 years in the future and the Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity (G.I.J.O.E.) are still saving humanity from an arms dealer. News of Wayans joining the cast came just a few weeks after it was announced that Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (LOST) and Said Taghmaoui (The Kite Runner) would be joining Sienna Miller and Ray Park in the cast as 'Heavy Duty' and 'Breaker'. So for fans who might be keeping track, so far making appearances in the film will be; Ripcord, Heavy Duty, Breaker, with the possibility of Scarlett and Storm Shadow also popping up. Shooting is set to begin in Los Angeles this February and G.I. Joe is scheduled for release on August 7th, 2008.

*Correction: Joes were known as the "Real American Heroes"

Yesterday Mr. Christopher Q. Campbell informed us that both Rachel Nichols and Byeong-Heon Lee had been cast in Stephen Sommers' G.I. Joe movie (as "Scarlett" and "Storm Shadow," respectively). Now comes word from The Hollywood Reporter that a few more actors have joined the fray. In addition to the aforementioned ladies (and the already-cast Sienna Miller and Ray Park), we can now add Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje and Said Taghmaoui to the cast. They'll be playing "Heavy Duty" and "Breaker," respectively (again).

I know next to nothing about these characters, but I am pretty familiar with both actors. (Not personally.) Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje is the guy who did amazing work as Simon Adibisi on HBO's prison series Oz, but moviegoers may remember him from flicks like The Mummy Returns, The Bourne Identity or Get Rich or Die Tryin'. (Yes, he's also on Lost.) And Said Taghmaoui is another great character actor. You've seen him recently in stuff like The Kite Runner, I Heart Huckabees and Hidalgo, but I'll always remember him as the chillingly logical interrogator from the excellent Three Kings.

Expect a lot more Joe casting reports as the action ensemble continues to come together.

In the midst of all the casting speculation for the big-budget version of Hasbro's G.I. Joe, I don't quite think fans expected to hear this name pop up first. Variety reports that Sienna Miller has officially become first actor to sign for the Stephen Sommers (The Mummy) film. Nothing has been simple with this film; starting back in June when it was reported that Paramount had ordered two different scripts for the film, only to do away with one entirely and then hire a brand new script writer. According to Variety, the story will center on, "Brussels-based GI OE, an acronym for the Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, and revolves around an international co-ed force of operatives who use high-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil org headed by a Scottish arms dealer".

So how might Miller fit into the story, you may ask? According to Variety, she will play "raven-haired baroness and sexy femme fatale skilled in espionage" -- which is probably a compendium of some of Joe's more famous leading ladies. But considering Miller's history as a model, you think they would have made her Cover Girl.

Most of the casting is still up in the air for the film, despite some of the goofy rumors floating around; at one time or another Mark Wahlberg, George Clooney, and Jason Statham were all attached to the project. But, Miller gets the distinction of being the first actor to officially sign on to a big-screen version of a toy commercial. Paramount hopes to begin shooting this February. G.I. Joe is set for release on August 7th, 2009.