At first, I mistakenly thought that War, Inc. was a re-named version of Talking to Dog, that Children of Men rip-off I wrote about last year. (It's actually a re-named version of Brand Hauser: Stuff Happens.) War stars John Cusack and Hilary Duff, just like the other one was supposed to. Now Talking to Dog seems to have fallen off the face of the earth, so did the movie studios consider the rip-off angle and go in a new direction? Or did Hilary just follow John to this new endeavor? Or, did my attempts at weird mental mojo* work and make that other project die for good?

Whatever the case, Hilary and John are starring in War, Inc. with sister Joan, Marisa Tomei, and Ben Kingsley, and Rope of Silicon has your first look at the action, and John Cusack's furrowed brow (which you can see a bit of to the upper right). This should be tons better than the other option for a number of reasons, but mainly because the unique, surreal voice of Mark Leyner wrote this puppy. (He's written great novels like The Tetherballs of Bougainville and Et Tu, Babe?)

The film once again puts John in the assassin role, and this time he's contracted to kill an oil minister from the Middle East (Ben Kingsley). Instead of high school reunions, however, his cover is "producing a big trade show that includes a wedding between a local pop star and a politico, but complications ensue." The pics don't show too much, but it is strange to see Hilary Duff looking like a cross between a pop star and tough-ass scorpion tamer in one of them. The film is set for a limited release this May.

*I was so against this project, that I figured if I can make new DVDs pop up by buying the old VHS or bare-bones disc version, or off-handedly talk about celebrity deaths right before they happen, maybe I could will Dog into cinematic death.

Okay...there are times when I can excuse the lack of originality in Hollywood. Scratch that. There are times when I can turn a blind eye to rampant repetition. But this news is 100%, undeniably, certifiably stupid. It's one thing to make a movie that follows a similar occasion or time period, or hell, even a person. It's another thing to take an interesting, unique idea, and nab it when the original has only been out for mere months. I don't know where to begin, other than I hope that this is a complete joke. But we're still a few months away from April Fool's Day.

Moviehole has reported that John Cusack and Hilary Duff will be starring in writer and director Mark Roper's new flick, Talking to Dog. Who is Roper? He's the man behind such films as Operation Delta Force 3 and City of Fear. Firstly, the movie is being described as a cross between Mad Max and Blue Velvet, which is like equating Jessica Simpson with Helen Mirren. Secondly, it deals with a post-apocalyptic future where global warming is spreading its wrath and women are infertile. At the absolute, very least, you think they'd mix it up a little -- make the men impotent or something. Nope. I will leave you with a quote of the reported synopsis, because I really couldn't word it any better:

"Time has stood still for two, small communities. The consequences of Global warming, the lack of fuel, power and communication, have left them in isolation. Dying has become an industry, a woman able to give birth, now only a dream. Into this environment, a young man arrives. He is able to communicate with the dead, able to learn secrets of the past. Because of his presence, the two communities learn that love, in a dying world, is still alive and that there is always hope, even over greed." Is this the last frontier of idiocy? A terrible rumor? A stroke of genius? Discuss.