I don't know how I never saw these, but some old Canadian Filmmakers Festival posters are sailing through the web, and they show what spoofing should be like. Think Jaws -vs- a fisherman, the little Poltergeist girl swayed by hockey, Superman ready for winter, and Dorothy in a pair of sensible boots rather than slippers. But my favorite is above, because it would make one hell of an awesome comedic remake of The Birds. Canadian geese -- they're the real birdly foe. They take over outdoor spaces, attack you to mark their territory, and they're scarier than Hitchcock's mean feathered fiends. If only these were the sort of spoofs hitting the big screen these days.

Check them out in the gallery below, and read more about the festival over here.



[via Slashfilm]

Note to Jessica: Please don't ever cut your hair. Yes, that's Jessica Alba up top re-creating that memorable scene from Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho. No, thankfully, she's not starring in another remake -- this time the gal took part in a photo shoot for Latina Magazine where she re-created memorable scenes from several classic horror films. Hmm, I think I smell a trend brewing. Yup, definitely a trend. And is it me, or does Alba look like she's kinda laughing in that image; not screaming. It's like a laugh scream -- and I hear only the most talented actresses can pull one off successfully.

The other films Alba, ahem, crucified during the photo shoot include Rosemary's Baby, Scream, The Birds and The Ring. You can check out those photos in the gallery below, and be sure to let us know (as well as Alba) which one you think she should remake next.

[Photos via Egotastic]

Though production was just pushed back due to Akiva Goldsman's script not being ready, it appears casting for Angels & Demons is still moving ahead. According to the New York Post, Naomi Watts has landed a starring role in the flick opposite Tom Hanks, which, like The Da Vinci Code, will once again be directed by Ron Howard. An insider told the Post that production has been put off "until at least February," which means we'll hopefully see the film arrive in theaters at some point in 2009 (it was originally scheduled for release on December 19, 2008). Though it was critically panned and, let's face it, not that good, The Da Vinci Code ultimately went on to gross a ridiculous $758 million worldwide.

Angels & Demons, which was also written by Dan Brown, is a prequel to The Da Vinci Code. The book once again follows Robert Langdon (Hanks) as he races against time to find a hidden bomb and hunt down a serial killer in Rome. Joining him in his quest is the adoptive daughter of a physicist who's strange murder (in which his chest is branded with a symbol) sparks a hunt for the truth. The girl's name is Vittoria, and we presume this is who Watts will be playing ... though Watts is not Italian, and doesn't exactly fit the character description. However, she is a high profile name and a damn good actress, so it'll be interesting to see how it all pans out. Watts is also attached to star in the remake of Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds, which is currently eying a Summer 2009 release. For those that have read Angels & Demons, is Watts what you had in mind for Vittoria? Good choice? Bad one?

Spock, Riddick and T-Bag walked into a bar ...

According to TrekMovie, as well an official listing on the man's site, 59-year-old British actor Ben Cross has landed the part of Sarek (aka Spock's pop) in the new J.J. Abrams-directed Star Trek XI. Heroes star Zachary Quinto will play Spock and Winona Ryder is playing Spock's mom, Amanda Grayson. Hmmm ... Yeah, I assume they've worked it all out, so I won't ask any questions. Cross has appeared in dozens of films over the years, most recently in War, Inc., and is likely best known for his starring role in Chariots of Fire. The character of Sarek was originally played by Mark Lenard.

Over on his website, director David Twohy tells fans he's down for making another Riddick flick, though he left out the part about the first (or should I say second) film not living up to the hype ... at all. Here's what he has to say: "All I can say now is "We're talking about it." The DVD numbers were really good - we know that, and some potential financiers know that. But if another movie surfaces, it probably won't be a Universal movie and probably will be an independent movie. Which means we'll have to make it for substantially less than the last installment." I'll throw out a number for ya: How about zero? [via Dark Horizons]

Those of you Prison Break fans out there should be very aware of the villain T-Bag (as played by Robert Knepper). Ya know, he's the slimy a**hole you just wish would go away. Die T-Bag! Die already! Anyway, according to a story in the Denver Post, Knepper has made a whole lot of fans as of late; so much so that the dude is lining up gigs in some of the most talked-about projects around. Not only do they claim he's up for the part of villain in Bond 22, but they're also saying he'll co-star alongside Hugh Jackman in the solo Wolverine flick as well as star in the remake of Alfred Hitchock's The Birds (currently titled: These F**king Pigeons Are Driving Me Crazy!) alongside Naomi Watts. Note to actors: Take that homicidal pedophile role; it'll lead to much better things down the line ... [via Moviehole]

UPDATE: I forgot to add that Fox News claims Mathieu Amalric (The Diving Bell and the Butterfly) has landed the role of Bond villain in Bond 22. Whether Knepper was up for the part, of if he'll be playing another villain, we're not sure. More as it develops ...

As Scott told you in April, the remake of Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds is soaring forward. It no longer looks like the film will start production this year, but it does seem to be a definite "go." The studio claims that the remake will be based less on the classic Hitchcock film and more on the source material -- a Daphne du Maurier short story. Still, I have no doubt some of Hitchcock's classic visuals will re-appear. Naomi Watts has been circling the Tippi Hedren role for a while now, but she is waiting to see the script (which already has four writers listed) before she officially signs on. The Hollywood Reporter has announced that the film now has a very likely director -- Martin Campbell. Campbell recently won over a lot of critics with Casino Royale, and if his take on The Birds sticks with the same sleek, stylish, subdued style, it could be something worth watching.

Any mention of this project riles up fans of the original, and Michael Bay is listed as one of the producers, which only upsets purists more. Bay's involvement does suggest birds with mini-bazookas on their beaks, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say I'm looking forward to The Birds 2.0: Bye Bye Birdie. Naomi Watts is one of my favorite actresses, and she's elevated genre material before (see The Ring). I don't have some great personal attachment to the original film -- it wouldn't even land on my list of Hitchcock's top ten. I'm not saying this new film would be an improvement, but it could be a scary, suspenseful good time. Yes, it's tempting to hate on the filmmakers for not being original, but how many bird attack movies do we get to see in the multiplexes? I'm all for another one. The new Birds is currently scheduled to fly into theaters on July 3, 2009. "Fly," get it? Cuz they're birds. Thank you.

The Birds are pissed off, and they're looking for revenge! We're coming up on the two year anniversary of the words "Michael Bay's company is going to tackle Hitchcock's 1963 thriller The Birds." Every time things slow down and you think that Hitchcock's classic might rest in peace, another bit of news comes up. First, Naomi Watts was rumored to take over Tippi Hedren's role, and then there's was a slight mention in Variety that the film would start shooting by the end of the year.

Now the mag has done it again. Slapped onto a story about Cathy Schulman's hires at Mandalay Pictures is a little bit for The Birds. Schulman says: "We think we have a very contemporary take. In the original, the birds just showed up, and it was kind of like, why are the birds here? This time, there's a reason why they're here and (people) have had something to do with it. There's an environmental slant to what could create nature fighting back." Oh yes, we've ruined their habitat and now we have to pay! Will they torpedo civilians with charred remains of the rain-forest? Are they only the first step in the animal apocalypse? Are killer badgers next?! Maybe this could work, but something about imbuing the birds with revenge and having them fight back makes me giggle.

At the tail-end of a Variety article about a spec script called Fiasco Heights and the way in which it was sold by a DreamWorks assistant to Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes shingle, there is one casual sentence that reads: "[The production company] aims to begin shooting a remake of "The Birds" for Universal by the end of the year," which is the first new information we've heard about the project since last October (when Naomi Watts was mentioned as a potential leading lady).

I guess I was hoping that this project would simply go away, but with Fiasco on the horizon (and something called The Horsemen in pre-production), it looks like producers Michael Bay and Andrew Form have got their attentions re-focused on the avian-centric remake thriller. Those who choose to follow such stories will no doubt remember the producers' claims that their Birds flick will hew closer to the original Daphne Du Maurier story and not the classic Alfred Hitchcock flick -- but I'm guessing if Du Maurier had written another book called Hippo Attack or Revenge of the Squirrels, it's The Birds that'd still be earmarked for a new adaptation. Why? Because, despite the protestations of the filmmakers, they know "The Birds" is a title that everyone already knows. And that's what the remake game is all about: Selling "name recognition" and little else.

Yeah, I'm a little salty about this particular project, and I freely admit it. But if The Birds is going to begin production some time this year, then we should definitely be getting reports on writers, actors and directors some time soon. Maybe my opinion of this remake will improve once some of those names hit the wire ... but I doubt it.

Why do you hate me so much Michael Bay? I just don't understand what I ever did to you. Why must you take exceptionally great and classic films of the past and then destroy them with remakes ... like you did with the Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning and/or The Amityville Horror? Isn't it enough for you to make your own films which defy any semblance of logic, story or performance? Have you even watched Pearl Harbor? And now you're at it again.

What is Michael Bay's latest transgression? It's his planned remake of one of the best suspense thrillers of all time -- Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds. Universal Pictures and Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes production company have been developing a remake of the suspense classic for over a year now and only recently attached a scribe -- Leslie Dixon , writer of The Thomas Crown Affair remake and the Freaky Friday remake. Anyone see a pattern here?

At the moment, there is no casting news or start date for the film, but indications point to the role made famous by Tippi Hedren in the original being offered any day now to Naomi Watts. I think Naomi is a talented actress and she's proven her abilities in films such as The Ring and Mulholland Drive, but even though she would probably be great in the part, I still wonder why this film has to be made at all. Even Platinum Dunes producer Brad Fuller's assurances that this version will stay more faithful to the original novel by Daphne Du Maurier doesn't fill me with a great deal of confidence. In my perfect world, things like this would never happen at all. How about you?

I'll just say it like I'm tearing off a bandage:

They'reremakingTheBirds.

Whew. Wait, put down your pitchforks for a second. Here's the scoop:

You know those gore-happy Platinum Dunes dudes? The ones who gave you The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and The Amityville Horror? And this October's Massacre prequel? And next year's Hitcher remake? Yeah, those guys. They're making a movie called The Birds.

But producer Brad Fuller is making one thing abundantly, thoroughly, and in all ways crystal clear: They'll be working from the original Daphne Du Maurier short story and NOT from the dazzlingly cool Alfred Hitchcock film. The thousands of tickets they'll inevitably sell thanks to the "non-connection" to the Hitchcock flick is, of course, just good fortune.

Mr. Fuller also announced that his Birds screenwriters have been chosen: the two knuckleheads who wrote freakin' Boogeyman.