It's been quite some time since the Farrelly Bros. have given us a gem like There's Something About Mary, Kingpin or Dumb and Dumber. Big-screen comedy trends seem to be changing; moving away from the random gross-out gags and more toward the random pop-culture references. But that won't stop Bobby and Peter Farrelly from navigating toward material they're familiar with -- and Variety tells us their latest comes from a script written by Mike Arnold and Chris Poole. It's called Beaujolais. Yup. I don't know what it means; Wiki says it's a wine.

Anyway, the Farrelly boys are going to produce with an eye on possibly directing. Variety describes Beaujolais as a "redneck action-adventure with a protagonist along the lines of Austin Powers or Ace Ventura." So basically it's Larry the Cable guy with a few more catchphrases. Danny McBride is currently in talks to star; he's popped up in films like The Heartbreak Kid and Hot Rod, with upcoming roles in Land of the Lost and Tropic Thunder.

Do you think Peter and Bobby Farrelly still have a comedy classic left inside them? Or has their type of humor simply taken a long walk off a short pier? (Man, would I love to see another Outside Providence from these boys ...)

Want to know a dirty little secret?

Contrary to what you've heard recently, critics hate writing bad reviews.

No, they're not fun to write; they're exhausting. No, they're not less work than a good review; they're more difficult. And when you love movies -- which you better, as a critic -- you don't sit down in the dark before a film and think, "Boy, I hope the next two hours of my life will be wasted." But every movie is not, in fact, good -- and these were the high marks among the low points in 2007, from one critic's highly subjective perspective.

1. The Heartbreak Kid

Racist, sexist, misogynist -- and, even worse, not funny. The Farrelly Brothers proved their "King Midas in reverse" touch by turning a classic piece of comedy gold into a lump of trash. The only possible bright side comes in the fact that the Farrelly's status as box-office kings has now been tarnished, hopefully hastening their slide to straight-to-video film making.

DVD releases are a little wacky and slow due to the holiday, so here's some nibbles from this week. Happy whatever-it-is-your-celebrating-or-not!

The Kingdom
Taking a cue from Babel, Peter Berg's The Kingdom details a deadly attack on American forces in Saudi Arabia that becomes an international news piece. However, unlike the other film, Berg's adds in the quest for retribution. While diplomats work slowly, an FBI special agent played by Jamie Foxx puts together a team to hunt down the man behind the attack. As our own James Rocchi described it: "if The Kingdom does offer bitter pills to swallow, it's also smart enough to offer a little action-flick sugar to help them go down." It's action also starring the likes of Chris Cooper, Jennifer Garner, and Jason Bateman, so it's hard to go wrong.

The DVD offers deleted scenes, a breakdown of "The Apartment Shootout" scene as well as another about "The Freeway Sequence," a making-of featurette, commentary, and even a history education piece. You can search a timeline of events to learn more about the issues through news stories and featurettes.

Check out James' Take and Ryan's Take | Buy the DVD


The Heartbreak Kid
I admit, this is a bit of Christmas charity since it's a slow week of releases. The Heartbreak Kid probably wouldn't have made the list otherwise, but Merry Christmas, Ben Stiller. Coming to us from the Farrelly Brothers, who have brought us the likes of Dumb & Dumber, There's Something About Mary, and Stuck on You, The Heartbreak Kid tells the case of really, really bad timing -- the tale of a man who falls for someone else during his honeymoon. On the one hand, you've got Malin Akerman (who will soon kick butt in Zach Snyder's Watchmen) playing the wife who reveals her rough spots after marrying ol' Ben. On the other, there's Michelle Monaghan, who plays Stiller's perfect girl.

Like any good comedy DVD, the extras include a gag real, as well as commentary, deleted scenes, "The Farrelly Brothers in the French Tradition," "Ben & Jerry," "Heartbreak Halloween," and an egg toss, just in case you needed some added action on the disc.

Check out James Rocchi's Review | Buy the DVD

Other New DVD Releases

The Brothers Solomon
Pan's Labyrinth -- Blu-ray or HD
Living & Dying
Lost and Found: The Harry Langdon Collection

Check out Peter Martin's Indies on DVD for even more new releases.

Would you ever believe that Eva Longoria dated Jason Biggs? Well, Hollywood is asking us to suspend our disbelief, because the two are starring in a comedy in which they play former flames. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the sexy "desperate housewife" and the doofy "pie f**cker" have been cast alongside Rob Corddry in Lower Learning, the debut feature from writer-director Mark Lafferty, who was responsible for the gay-centric Sixth Sense spoof, The Seventh Sense ("I see gay people"). In Lower, Corddry will play a shady elementary school principal under investigation by Longoria's inspector with help from her ex, a former cop who is now a vice principal. The cast will also include Corddry's old Daily Show co-worker Ed Helms, Tenacious D's Kyle Gass and Saw's Monica Potter. I don't know about you, but I expect this to be another movie in which the adults are less mature than the children.

I hope there aren't too many disappointed men out there, but Jason Biggs isn't much of a substitute for Beyoncé Knowles. Remember last year, Longoria was said to be doing a lesbian film with Knowles, but the rumor was quickly and unfortunately shot down. Well, let's just hope Longoria's character doesn't end up getting back together with Biggs' character, so we don't have to suffer through their reunion kiss -- though I've already suffered from imagining it. I'm rather hoping this movie focuses more on Corddry, who is a lot more enjoyable to watch. However, I might be in a minority here, considering audiences weren't too receptive to his recent sitcom The Winner, nor were they interested in his starring role in Blackballed: The Bobby Dukes Story nor as support in The Heartbreak Kid. Personally, I think he needs another shot at carrying a movie -- his next few roles are fairly small, playing second fiddle to Justin Long, Will Ferrell, Harold & Kumar and Ashton Kutcher. Like Longoria, he could definitely do better.

I have to say, there was a time when I would really look forward to a new Farrelly Brothers flick. But not long after There's Something About Mary, Dumb and Dumber and Outside Providence (a personal favorite, which was written by the boys, who did not direct it), they began to lose it. The downward spiral began with Me, Myself and Irene, continued with Shallow Hal and bottomed out with Stuck on You. And it's real sad that I've come to the point where I've actually skipped their last two films, Fever Pitch (directed, but not written by) and The Heartbreak Kid. But some felt The Heartbreak Kid would be their rebound film; reuniting with Ben Stiller for the first time since Mary, the brothers were sure to find their magic again. Unfortunately, they did not. The film, which was predicted to open at number one this weekend with at least $20 million, came in at number two (with only $14 million) behind The Game Plan (a film in its second week; it grabbed $16.3 million).

The film marks the first "bomb" for DreamWorks this year, and who are they blaming for the lackluster opening? Yup, the critics. But if the critics -- and their harsh reviews (including one from our own James Rocchi) -- are to blame, then how do you explain the box office success that was Norbit? That film is currently sitting at a dreadful 9% at Rotten Tomatoes, while The Heartbreak Kid is at 30%. So did moviegoers all of a sudden decide to listen to the critics? Or is DreamWorks just looking to blame someone other than themselves and the Farrelly Brothers? Personally, with the success that Judd Apatow has had in these last two years, I really feel people expect more out of their comedy. That, coupled with poor placement and crappy-looking trailers, kept people away from Stiller and Co. this past weekend. But that's just my opinion ...

... so here's where I ask you: Why didn't you go see The Heartbreak Kid this weekend?

For people in South Brooklyn, there are two great incentives to going to the movies on Tuesdays. Unfortunately, each is offered by a different theater. At the independently owned Cobble Hill Cinema, the attraction is discounted tickets -- $6.50 instead of the usual $9. Down the street, at the huge Regal Entertainment-owned UA Court Street Stadium 12, the deal is a free small popcorn -- upgraded to a medium for only 50 cents.

So, being a South Brooklynite, I typically schedule my movie going for Tuesdays. But how do I choose which theater to patronize? Well, obviously, the first factor is what movies each theater is showing. Normally, Cobble Hill has indie films and other similar, adult-oriented fare (I don't mean porn; I mean Elizabeth: The Golden Age) while the UA has mostly mainstream, studio pictures (e.g. The Heartbreak Kid). However, on occasion, they are both showing the one movie I want to see. This week, for instance, both theaters are running The Kingdom.

Because I'm both cheap and poor, the best draw seems to be Cobble Hill's discount ticket. But then if I'm going to buy popcorn (I almost always want popcorn), it isn't really any cheaper than going to the UA and paying $11.25 for a ticket and a medium bag. And as much as I'd like to say that you should always support the mom-and-pop business, the truth is that I prefer the projection, the seats and, most importantly, the corn at the UA. Besides, Cobble Hill offers its discount on Thursdays, too; so anytime I choose to see a movie on that day of the week, the smaller business is definitely first choice.

You might be tempted to feel a little pity for the Farrelly Brothers; they defined the big-box-office smutty comedy with movies like There's Something About Mary, Dumb and Dumber and Kingpin. Recently, they've sort of had their thunder (and box office) stolen by Judd Apatow's band of merrymakers and the success of Knocked Up and The 40-Year-Old Virgin. But that mild temptation to feel pity turns into a more steely impetus to feel contempt after you witness the squalid, lumbering mess that is The Heartbreak Kid, the Farrelly's latest effort to regain their toilet-throne as the kings of the gross-out comedy. Originally released in 1972, The Heartbreak Kid saw Neil Simon adapting Bruce Jay Friedman's short story A Change of Plan, with direction by Elaine May. The idea is simple -- a man, while on his honeymoon, meets and falls for another woman. The execution in the 1972 film was elegant, astute and smart: A comedy of manners about the mores and meanings of modern marriage, springing from the minds of three clever, talented comedians who knew how to go for the jugular and still had the sense to back off and let us breathe a little.

I only mention this in order to contrast it with the 2007 update, which is inelegant, oblivious and crass: A 'comedy' of rudeness about the mindlessness and meaningless of modern moviemaking, spring from the gonads and bowels of two dim, untalented filmmakers who only know how to cross the line and lack any sense whatsoever. In this iteration of The Heartbreak Kid, our hero is a San Francisco sporting goods store owner played by Ben Stiller. He's been commitment-phobic for so long that he may in fact be commitment-proof, which is weighing heavy on his mind after the Valentine's Day wedding of a woman he was once engaged to. On his way home, though, he has a meet-cute with a surprisingly vivacious and charming woman, Malin Akerman; they fall into a whirlwind courtship, but the news that her work wants to send her to Rotterdam a few weeks into their relationship inspires Stiller to make a leap of faith and propose. The wedding follows soon after.

Not that my predictions are always right -- glance below at my fourth place standing for proof of my fallibility -- but the family comedy The Game Plan really surprised me by outdoing The Kingdom by nearly $6 million. Last week's number one flick Resident Evil: Extinction slowed to the pace of a shambling reanimated corpse with its box office take dropping by 66%. The box office loot was distributed thusly:

1. The Game Plan $22.9 million
2. The Kingdom: $17.1 million
3. Resident Evil: Extinction: $8 million
4. Good Luck Chuck: $6.2 million
5. 3:10 to Yuma: $4.2 million

This week's new flicks feature teen rappers, the Farrelly Brothers, and a kid on a magical adventure.

Feel the Noise
What's It All About: When his life is threatened, a young aspiring hip-hop star is forced to move to Puerto Rico with his estranged father.
Why It Might Do Well: A tale of teen angst with romance, an exotic setting, and rap tunes? It should do well with teen audiences.
Why It Might Not Do Well: The appeal of this one may be too narrow, with little to offer audiences over twenty-five or so.
Number of Theaters: 3,000
Prediction: $3 million

The Heartbreak Kid
What's It All About: Ben Stiller re-teams with the Farrelly Brothers for this remake of a 1972 film of the same name which was written by Neil Simon. Stiller plays a man who finally meets the love of his life, but only after he has married a woman he comes to despise while on their honeymoon.
Why It Might Do Well: We are talking about the Farrelly Brothers here, and I suspect this will be the number one movie next week.
Why It Might Not Do Well: Stiller often seems to be playing the same character, and this looks an awful lot like a retread of There's Something About Mary.
Number of Theaters: 3,000
Prediction: $26 million

The Seeker: The Dark is Rising
What's It All About: A young boy learns that he is the latest in a line of warriors who combat the forces of evil, and he embarks upon a series of adventures as he travels through time.
Why It Might Do Well: This one seems to be shooting for the same demographic as the Harry Potter movies which have racked in huge box office.
Why It Might Not Do Well: J.K. Rowling is a tough act to follow.
Number of Theaters: 3,200
Prediction: $9 million

After these three new flicks hit theaters this weekend, I suspect the results will look something like this.
1. The Heartbreak Kid
2. The Game Plan
3. The Seeker: The Dark is Rising
4. The Kingdom
5. Resident Evil: Extinction

Perfect scores were earned by three intriguingly named individuals, so congratulations to Destro, Carlos the Jackal, and Bubba8193. I can hear them cackling with glee from here.

1. Destro: 16
1. Carlos the Jackal: 16
1. Bubba8193: 16
2. Nathan: 13
3. Mario: 11
3. Max: 11
4. Matt: 8
4. Josh: 8
4. Porcalina: 8
4. Chris: 8
5. Gregory Rubinstein: 6
5. Peter: 6
5. Anna07: 6
5. Ray: 6
6. Lee: 4

Come on, folks, share your box office predicting prowess with the world! Please post your prediction in the comments section below before 5:00PM on Saturday. One point for every top five movie correctly named, two points for every correct placement, and one extra point for the top movie. Bragging rights and a hearty "congratulations" from yours truly can be yours. PLEASE NOTE: Congratulations will not be delivered in person and may be tempered by gritted teeth and a snarky attitude if your prediction is more accurate than mine (which is highly possible).

The trailers I looked at this week seemed to be forming a pattern, so we're going to follow the bouncing ball as it moves from one preview to another, starting with...

Midnight Meat Train
This one is based on a particularly grisly story from Clive Barker's pretty grisly to begin with Books of Blood series. Scott Weinberg first discussed this one here on Cinematical back in May of 2006. I'm always leery of films based on a short story, especially one I enjoyed. Expanding the tale to feature length requires so much padding the original material can easily get lost. The trailer does a nice job of presenting the premise with a lovely sense of dread. A photographer trying to capture the essence of the city on film witnesses an unspeakably brutal act in a subway car. Someone or something is literally butchering people and harvesting the meat. I did say grisly, right? And speaking of trains...

Rails and Ties
A suicidal woman parks her car on the train tracks and waits for the inevitable. Kevin Bacon plays the conductor who is unable to stop the train in time. The woman's son witnesses the tragedy, and eventually forms a bond with the conductor and his wife (Marcia Gay Harden), apparently being accepted as part of the family. A fairly intense looking human drama that represents a nice change from all the explosions, super heroes and such from the summer movie season. Bacon is one of the greats and it looks like he carries this one well. This film also marks the feature directorial debut of Clint Eastwood's daughter Alison Eastwood. You can read Kim Voynar's review of the film here. And speaking of unusual family dynamics...

Some would argue that Peter and Bobby Farelly haven't made a successful comedy in seven years, with Me, Myself and Irene being their last highly-enjoyable venture. I'm of the opinion that there are moments of brilliance in each of their films (I skipped Fever Pitch because, as a Yanks fan, I refused to watch an entire film that revolved around the Boston Red Sox) and, when you deliver classics like Dumb & Dumber, Kingpin and There's Something About Mary, it's hard not to be stoked for what the brothers have planned for us next. That said, I give you the first trailer for The Heartbreak Kid, courtesy of Yahoo!; starring Ben Stiller as, well, Ben Stiller ... in pretty much every single movie he's appeared in.

Loosely based on the 1972 film of the same name (which was written by the great Neil Simon) The Heartbreak Kid follows a lonely bachelor named Eddie (Stiller) who thinks he's finally met the girl of his dreams in Lila (Malin Akerman); a gorgeous blonde with a spirited personality. However, after the two tie the knot and head to Cabo for their honeymoon, Eddie begins to learn that Lila is -- how shall I say -- out of her friggin' mind. So, when Eddie meets the down-to-earth Miranda (Michelle Monaghan) -- a girl, he feels, might really be The One -- he'll have to somehow find a way out of the crumbling relationship he's currently in, all while attempting to woo a girl who doesn't know he's already married, let alone on his honeymoon. As expected, pic looks packed with plenty of Farelly-esque gags; we have a pretty nasty fart joke, lots of disgusting make-up, a few moments of physical comedy and a lovable hero who can't seem to land a break.

Since this is the first Farelly Bros. pic Stiller has starred in since the stellar There's Something About Mary, I'm optimistic that The Heartbreak Kid will reunite us with some of that old school Farelly shtick we fell in love with all those years ago. Let us know what you think; The Heartbreak Kid arrives in theaters on October 5.