TotalRecall Tagged Articles at Cinematical

Has this thought ever crossed your mind: 'Boy, The Godfather was awesome. But it needs to be remade as a gangster saga in the hip hop world.' Or: 'The Shawshank Redemption was great, but I want a prequel, with Zac Efron as the Tim Robbins dude in college!' Or: 'Citizen Kane had too much talking -- and no color! I thought my TV was broken. I hope they reboot it with Will Smith as a rich guy who creates a new social networking site, marries a supermodel, and flies to the Moon!'

Has there ever been remake / reboot news that you've warmly greeted? We've groaned about / bitched about a ton of remakes in various stages of development. Just within the last month, we've written about Short Circuit, Alien, Total Recall, The Karate Kid, Scream, Barbarella, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Flight of the Navigator, Footloose, Mona Lisa, The Mechanic, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. Also looming out there: Predator, Commando, Nightmare on Elm Street, The Warriors, Tell No One, and District B13, among many others. Next week, The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 hits theaters, and later this year Fame, Night of the Demons, A Christmas Carol, The Wolfman, and Brothers will endeavor to obliterate all memory of their original inspirations.

As Elvis Costello once sang, "I used to be disgusted and now I try to be amused." Of all these, I'm least looking forward to Total Recall, but most of these numb me with disinterest. How about you? Can you pick out one that is your absolute, most fury-inducing, 'how dare they' remake / reboot?

Go ahead and get that "AARGHHH!!!!" out of your system now. You'll feel better. (I have done so as well.) The remake that our own Eugene Novikov refused to believe a few short months ago is now moving forward. Total Recall will receive a "contemporized adaptation," according to The Hollywood Reporter. Kurt Wimmer has been hired to write the script, which may or may not be based on "We Can Remember It For You Wholesale," the Philip K. Dick story that inspired the original.

THR notes Wimmer's recent scripts for the upcoming thrillers Law Abiding Citizen and Salt, but the more pertinent credits are the ones he earned as writer / director of Equilibrium and Ultraviolet, which provided action thrills in science-fictional settings. If you harbor any hopes for this project, you can only dream that Wimmer can come up with something more closely resembling Equilibrium, a trashy yet entirely entertaining little surprise, rather than the flat, anemic, entirely incoherent Ultraviolet.

Beyond the "weird and scary and totally singular" elements that Eugene rhapsodized about previously, don't forget the juicy cast (Ah-nuld, Michael Ironside, Ronny Cox, Sharon Stone, Rachel Ticotin). Then there's the whole go-for-broke / super-violent / cheesy-but-we-don't-care / 70s B-picture vibe that was infused by director Paul Verhoeven. In today's environment, that wouldn't fly. I shudder to think of of a rote, toothless, PG-13 action pic that has state-of-the-art special effects but abuses Dick's clever concept and ignores Verhoeven's funky / chic artistic aesthetic. However, to paraphrase Smokey the Bear, "only YOU can prevent remakes" by not going to see them.

I don't want to believe; that's part of it. But really: Total Recall? Weird and scary and totally singular Total Recall? The one with the people being turned into mutants by cosmic rays and the villain who turns Martians into slaves by controlling the air supply? The one where that dude takes off his glove to reveal that holy crap, he's a mutant too? And the three boobs? Remember the three boobs?

Okay, I'm obviously working out some issues here, the main one being that I saw Total Recall as a very young boy and it scared and confused the ever-loving bejeezus out of me (in the best possible way, natch). But really, there's no way to remake Verhoeven's bizarro masterpiece, as I Am Legend (and Made of Honor!) producer Neal H. Moritz claims he's going to do. They might re-adapt the Philip K. Dick story, "We Can Remember It for You Wholesale," but that's a different matter. Dick adaptations are a dime a dozen. So, Mr. Moritz, I don't believe you. Shouldn't you be busy getting The Green Hornet off the ground, anyway? Go wrangle Michel Gondry.

I note, also, that as best I can tell no Arnold Schwarzenegger movie has ever been remade. This may be because people have been physically afraid of him, in which case his advancing age, along with a distinguished civil service career that would make it unseemly for him to murder five men with his bare hands (and surely the man would never stoop to a contract job), may increase the odds of a Total Recall redo. Another possibility involves a combination of two factors: a) Arnold Schwarzenegger movies are always and forever Arnold Schwarzenegger movies, and b) the notion of an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie with some girly man who is not Arnold Schwarzenegger in the Arnold Schwarzenegger role is patently absurd. People would just laugh. Right? That's why this never went anywhere two years ago, right?

I don't know the last time I felt like a kid at the movies, but while watching Journey to the Center of the Earth 3-D this past week, I honestly reverted to my 8-year-old self. That isn't to say the movie is necessarily as good as the movies that astonished me as a kid -- because of the subject matter, I'd think about comparing it to Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom and The Goonies, both of which came out when I was around that age, and neither to which this film holds up in terms of originality or storytelling craft. But as far as holding onto my sense of wonder, Journey is up there.

Of course, it's necessary to point out that Journey would be nothing without the digital 3-D factor. It's actually the first live-action narrative feature to be shot and released in the new format (the non-fiction concert films, U2 3D and Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert Tour were technically the first live-action 3-D features), and while it's far from perfect, it is a terrific pioneer. I shall continue favoring the look of animated 3-D films, especially those directed as well as Monster House, and I anticipate that James Cameron's Avatar will blow away all live-action 3-D films released prior to its arrival. For now, though, I'm telling you, with the utmost cinemaphilic urgency: you need to see this ASAP.

Get your ass to Mars ... again. According to Moviehole, there's a new Total Recall movie in the works, but it is hard to really tell if it's to be a sequel or a remake. Apparently The Weinsteins have owned the rights to the original TR for years and they had plans to do a follow up. Then Spielberg's Minority Report happened. Huh? Aside from also being adapted from a Philip K. Dick story, MR has nothing to do with TR. Except that it was originally scripted by Ronald Schusett and Gary Goldman as Total Recall 2. Of course, the end result bears no resemblance to that draft, in which Tom Cruise's character was actually Arnold Schwarzenegger's Doug Quaid, the Precogs were mutated humans (from the Martian atmosphere) and all the action took place on Mars. Still, Moviehole claims Minority Report beat The Weinsteins to the punch and so this new Total Recall project will in fact be a remake.

Personally, I don't see how Minority Report keeps The Weinsteins from doing a sequel. Dick's story had no relation to his "We Can Remember It for You Wholesale", which was the inspiration for Total Recall, and really the movie makes no reference. Sure, Schusett and Goldman's idea for a sequel is no longer possible, but there is certainly other ways to do one. However, the fact that Schwarzenegger isn't exactly an actor these days also contributes to the problems with producing a sequel. Doing a follow up without him, though, would not be that surprising. In fact, it is particularly common with Paul Verhoeven movies to do a sequel without the stars of the first film (Hollow Man II; Robocop 3; Starship Troopers 2). At least Sharon Stone is interested in a Total Recall sequel. Certainly it would be more ridiculous to go the remake route, considering how popular Verhoeven's original was -- and still is.

I wasn't even aware that the rights to Terminator 2: Judgment Day were owned by Lionsgate Films, but as of today the film is available on iTunes. Yes, that is right, Lionsgate titles are now offered through Apple's download store, almost six months after the studio had originally thought they would be. Back in September, Lionsgate CEO Jon Feltheimer announced to investors the deal to release movies through iTunes -- one of the first leaks that iTunes would definitely sell movies, in fact. But then a few weeks later Apple's movie store opened with no Lionsgate titles included, and no word on when they would be available.

I have a feeling that Lionsgate was finally clear to deal with Apple once Wal-Mart announced its own movie download service. Now iTunes has about 400 movies, which is still a lot less than Wal-Mart's 1,000. Some of the additions today include Total Recall, The Blair Witch Project, Dirty Dancing and Monster's Ball (which I bet is great for watching on public transportation). Hopefully, we'll hear from other studios soon. Next, likely, will be an announcement from 20th Century Fox since it was once thought it would be the first non-Disney studio to sign on.