This weekend I get to cat sit the two cutest bengals on earth, but the perks of this gig are much more than sitting around, indulging in cable television, and playing with the furry little beasts. It also means I have a huge selection of liquor, wine and beer at my disposal to cook with and imbibe. So, while my mind is scheming up what sort of exotic drink I will make tonight, it's also thinking of alcohol-laden movies.

For this double feature, I'm giving you two of my favorite movies that are completely intertwined with the love of alcohol. One is quirky, but fairly straight-laced, while the other is just insanity, but in the immensely fun sort of way. I give you: Alexander Payne's Sideways and Guy Maddin's The Saddest Music in the World. (If you're looking for even more choices, check out Christopher Campbell's Cinematical Seven from last December.)

Well, it's official. The Writers Guild of America is going on strike tomorrow. Here's hoping the strike ends quickly and that all parties come away happy. And writers? Use this time off to study my choices for the seven best screenplays of the 2000's:

The 40 Year Old Virgin by Judd Apatow & Steve Carell

The blending of improvisation and the written word gives Apatow's two classic comedies -- Knocked Up would be the other -- a feeling of authenticity that is all too rare in today's film world. Apatow takes the strategy of writing for specific performers and their strengths, and it really pays off. Scoff if you want at a sex comedy making the list, but for a movie to be this incredibly funny -- while keeping an oddly touching romance and a spot-on character study afloat -- the screenwriters deserve high praise.

About Schmidt by Alexander Payne & Jim Taylor

One of the saddest comedies ever made, and one of the most truthful and painful portraits of old age. Payne and Taylor specialize in scripts about people on the verge of cracking, depressed souls who tend to find the smallest redemption possible. Payne/Taylor characters never go from Point A to Point B over the course of the screenplay, they go from Point A to Point A.1. The small, gradual changes in their characters are reflective of the way actual humans (as opposed to movie humans) work. Warren Schmidt's personal growth is so minor that it is confined to the last thirty seconds of the film, but when it comes it's an emotional punch in the gut.

I really loved the early Adam Sandler comedies, but his comedic output has been pretty grim lately. I expected better things from I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry for two reasons: co-screenwriters Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor. Along with the involvement of Steve Buscemi (and I'll be honest, the Jessica Biel underwear shot in the trailer), seeing Payne and Taylor's names in the credits had me downright excited to see the film. They're two of my favorite screenwriters -- Citizen Ruth, Election, Sideways, the beautiful About Schmidt -- these dudes can write. They did an uncredited polish on one of my favorite comedies of this decade -- Meet the Parents -- and I had high hopes that they'd take the struggling Sandler formula into similar territory. I hoped they'd make Chuck and Larry darker, more interesting, more truthful. And apparently they did. You just won't see that version on the screen. Over at Hollywood Elsewhere, Jeffrey Wells discusses the Payne/Taylor draft of the film.

According to Wells, the Payne/Taylor version "is way more invested in realism -- recognizable human behavior, logical bits and plot turns, real-seeming textures. It's obviously a "comedy" but the tone is less slap-sticky, more naturalistic." Wells discusses a lot of differences between the Payne/Taylor script and what wound up in theaters (like a Sandler/James kiss that didn't make it to the final cut), and closes by writing "I've thought and thought about this, and I know a Payne-Taylor version would have gone over better than the one opening on Friday. I know it. Certainly with the critics and the genuinely serious comedy fans (i.e., the ones who own DVDs of Some Like It Hot and Tootsie and Flirting With Disaster)." I do often wonder how many Hollywood movies start out in script form as strong and original and different and weird, and wind up lifeless and unimaginative and boring and stale. I'd imagine a whole lot of crappy films started out great on the page. I hear all these horror stories from writers who had their visions massacred by studios and executives, stars and directors, and it makes me sad. I'll still see the film (hey, it's got to be better than Click, right?), but with lowered expectations. If you get Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor to work on your script, doesn't it make sense to listen to absolutely everything they have to say?

Haven't you always wondered if celebrities have more fun at Christmas or other holidays? Does George Clooney have to exclaim with delight when a great-aunt gives him a package of gray socks? Can you imagine Johnny Depp's kids giving him a garish necktie that requires all his powers of acting to look delighted about? Does Britney Spears' mom demand that she go back into the bedroom and not come out again until she's dressed like a proper young lady?

I have to admit that normally I don't wonder about any of these things, because usually at Christmastime I have a number of other things occupying my mind, whether it's worrying about what to give my own grandmother, or looking forward to seeing all the nieces and nephews. Still, I realize there's a certain amount of amusement you can derive from imagining celebrity holiday celebrations. This year, celebrity holiday news includes pregnancy news, divorce, injury, a fire and a little charity. Sounds like a normal holiday to me.

Director Alexander Payne might only have three films under his belt, but you have to admit, Election, About Schmidt and Sideways were pretty impressive films. Payne was considered to be a great director that was going to revolutionize Hollywood comedies. The only problem was Payne hasn't exactly thrown himself into his work. His films have been few and far between, so we might have to settle for Payne producing a new film starring Michael Douglas and Evan Rachel Wood titled King of California.

There hasn't been any sign of this movie yet in North America, but an international trailer has been released. King of California follows an estranged father and daughter who bond during a road trip in a misguided search for treasure. Douglas portrays a man who has just been released from a mental institution that comes to live with his grown daughter and gets her to agree to come with him on a search for Spanish gold hidden somewhere in California. The film looks to be in line with Payne's quirky sense of humor and Douglas looks like he might be gunning for the Oscar that eluded him for Wonder Boys. King of California was written and directed by Mike Cahill and Nu Image Films is planning on a 2007 release.

[via Ain't It Cool News]

For some reason, Universal has been working on I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, a movie about firemen who pretend to be gay in order to win domestic partnership benefits, for years and years and years. (Actually, many states offer domestic partner benefits for heterosexual couples, too, but I guess that's less funny.) The movie's been through an almost endless parade of writers (Jon Favreau among them) and stars (Will Smith, Nicolas Cage, James Gandolfini, Vince Vaughn, and Wilson #2), but has never gotten out of the blocks. Now, however, the studio has found its dream team, and the movie is a go: according to The Hollywood Reporter, Adam Sandler and Kevin James will play the happy "couple."

The Sandler-James edition of the script has been written by, of all people, the Sideways team of Jim Taylor and Alexander Payne, and currently slated to direct is David Dobkin of Wedding Crashers fame, all of which sounds pretty promising. Though there are a lot of people in that Nearly Starred list that I'd rather see in this movie than the two currently on board, it's hard to deny that the behind-the-scenes team that's in line for this installment is the best group so far. Of course, whether the movie will actually happen this time is something else entirely.

Remember that whole pact the Sundance programmers made to de-glitz this year's line-up? It looks like what the films might lack in terms of big-name headliners, the juries will pick up the slack. Thomas Vinterberg, Lars Von Trier's founding partner in Dogme 95 and the director of Dear Wendy, one of the most revilied films at last year's fest, will lead a World Cinema jury also including chinese filmmaker Lu Chan, and Locarno Film Festival head Irene Bignardi. Alexander Payne, who won an Oscar last year for writing Sideways, will sit at the center of this year's Documentary jury, flanked by fellow Oscar winner Zana "Born into Brothels" Briski, editor/frequent Werner Herzog collaborator Joe Bini, and producer Heather Rae. The Dramatic Competition jury is equally noteworthy: Good Girl director Miguel Arteta will join Terrence Howard, whose work in Hustle and Flow was last year's Sundance sensation and will very likely earn the actor his first Oscar nomination, and Alan Rudolph, the Robert Altman protege who has unfortunately not graced us with a picture since 2003's very good The Secret Lives of Dentists. Less familiar names on the same list include cinematographer Nancy Schreiber (whose most notable IMDB feature credit is Blair Witch 2) and Audrey Wells, a screenwriter-for-hire and the director of Under the Tuscan Sun.