alone in the dark 2 Tagged Articles at Cinematical
The Year Ahead for Uwe Boll and His Fan(s)
Filed under: Action », Comedy », Horror », Independent », Sci-Fi & Fantasy », Comic/Superhero/Geek », Remakes and Sequels », Games and Game Movies », Cinematical Indie »
So it's been a little while since I posted anything about Uwe Boll, but this rather excellent article from GameDaily was precisely what I needed to recharge my Boll batteries. With no less than six inevitably awesome projects in the works, I suppose we can get ready for 2007: The Year of the Boll. Ugh, let's just break this celluloid carnage down into bullet points:- In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale -- The $60 million all-star action-adventure is, as they say, "in the can" and clocking in at just over two hours in length. Boll promises a nearly 3-hour version on DVD. The flick recently played at AFM and allegedly received ... praise! Awesome.
- BloodRayne 2 -- The $8.5 million sequel swaps Kristanna Loken for Natassia Malthe, but brings in Michael Pare to play Pat Garrett and Zack Ward for Billy the Kid. Yeah, it's a western -- and Billy the Kid is also a vampire. Yes, seriously. Regarding the subtler nuances of subtextual characterization, Boll says "We're going more bad ass in a way because BloodRayne does not have the internal battle of morality and integrity." Sounds like someone's been going to English class! Oh, and apparently there will almost definitely be a BloodRayne 3. Sweet!
- Postal -- Nearing completion and inevitably whacked. Guess who's starring? Zack Ward and Michael Pare. It's like DeVito/Douglas/Turner all over again.
- Seed -- Still coming somewhat soon: A horror movie. Michael Pare is starring. Yeah, Boll's found his muse in the Eddie and the Cruisers dude. IMDb says this movie is "completed," so keep your eyes peeled as you wander past that $5.50 DVD rack at Walmart.
- Far Cry -- Production begins in Hawaii this May, and Uwe seems pretty pumped about this particular project. Jason Statham may star, but apparently he's waiting to see how Dungeon Siege is received before he signs on with Boll again. (Statham must have a new agent.) Boll expects game company Ubisoft to be extra-helpful where the Far Cry movie is concerned, which hasn't happened on his previous projects ... for various and obvious reasons.
- Alone in the Dark 2 -- With his hilariously packed schedule, Boll couldn't possibly direct this (entirely unnecessary) sequel, so he's handing the franchise off to the guys who wrote the first Alone in the Dark -- which is sort of like leaving a lit candle in charge of 45 megatons of dynamite. Christian Slater might be returning for the sequel, but if not the director definitely wants someone "who looks like" the character in the video game. This guy's casting agents must have the world's funnest job.
...and when all this is over and done with, Uwe Boll wants to direct a movie about the Vietnam War. So which one will it be: Medal of Honor or Call of Duty? And how big will Michael Pare's role be?
Horror Stuff: Hills, BloodRayne, Hostel & Mask Goodies!
Filed under: Horror », Trailer Trash », Movie Marketing », Remakes and Sequels »
Those gore-soaked knuckleheads over at Bloody-Disgusting.com have had themselves one helluva busy day! First up is some wacky Uwe Boll news: Not only is the German goofball hoping to do a BloodRayne 3 some time soon, but it also looks like Christian Slater has signed on for Alone in the Dark 2. Ha! Take this news with a grain of salt, because Uwe is known for doling out press releases and gossipy tidbits at the drop of a hat -- but he's always good for a laugh, that Bollman.Next up we got the brand-new trailer for Scott Glosserman's rather excellent Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, which Anchor Bay will be releasing theatrically in February. The trailer blurbs about nine different critics, but left out the guy who wrote the planet's very first BTM review: Me! :-( Ah well, the movie still rocks. Horror fans should be prepared to fall madly in love with this clever little indie.
THEN we get the very first teaser trailer for Fox Atomic's The Hills Have Eyes 2 over at IGN Movies, which is suitably short, slick and spooky. (This sequel hits on March 9.)
Closing out the horror hijinks is an all-new international poster (also courtesy of IGN) for Eli Roth's Hostel 2 -- which really has to be seen to be believed. Let's just say it's ... meaty. (Hostel 2 now has a release date of June 8, by the way.)
Keep up the great work, o bloody & disgusting ones!
Uwe Boll Continues to Grow Progressively More Insane
Filed under: Horror », Remakes and Sequels »
And the Boll just keeps on rolling. Our excellent new guy Kevin Kelly recently shared some sequel news regarding Dr. Uwe Boll, but I hope you'll forgive me for expelling just a little extra information -- and venom ...As if it weren't enough to treat our planet to the ultra-junkernaut trilogy that is House of the Dead, Alone in the Dark and BloodRayne, to bitch about his well-earned and frequent criticisms, and to pummel a bunch of skinny kids into submission in a boxing ring ...
As if it weren't enough to threaten us with Seed, Postal and (god help us) In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale ... the guy's got more love yet to give: According to one of JoBlo's scoopers, Dr. Boll is planning not only that sequel called BloodRayne 2: Deliverance, but also something that's being described as "a sequel to Alone in the Dark." Argh! Nerdbuzz indicates that Kristanna Loken will be returning to play Ms. Rayne, and also that Christian Slater may be returning for his own indecipherable sequel. (Hey, actors gotta eat.)
Oh Uwe. Frankly, I just love this guy. He makes my job fun. He really does. I mean, how many filmmakers would be confident enough to mount sequels to flicks this amazingly bad? OK, Adam Shankman might, true. That's an easy one, but most filmmakers generally try to separate themselves from earlier failures -- whereas Bollman seems to revel in his cinematic travesties like a pigs wallows in their own ... well ... poop.
But hey, bring on the sequels, I say. Unintentional hilarity is still hilarity.
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