david spade Tagged Articles at Cinematical

I was watching Happy Gilmore the other day and I thought to myself, "Where did this guy go?" Adam Sandler comedies aren't for everyone -- they're silly and stupid and one step above an hour and a half of Yo Mama jokes (which isn't necessarily a bad thing -- remember how well it worked out for that scene in White Men Can't Jump ...). These days, however, amidst the Apatow and the Rogen and the Rudd, I'm finding it hard to locate those random Sandler die-hards. I know it's sad to say, but I don't think I've laughed during an Adam Sandler movie since Punch Drunk Love in 2002 ... and that wasn't even an "Adam Sandler movie", but more of a movie that starred Adam Sandler.

Which brings us to today, and an announcement in Variety that Sandler is reteaming with pretty much all the guys who've made crappy films with him in the past: Kevin James, Chris Rock, Rob Schneider, David Spade and director Dennis Dugan (Zohan). The film, which will begin shooting this summer, doesn't have a title but is described as a high-concept story about five best friends from high school who reunite 30 years later on Fourth of July weekend. Not sure what's high-concept about that (do they all turn into superheroes?), but we'll see where they take it. With all these guys, it'll either turn out to be the biggest piece of cow dung to ever hit the screen ... or maybe, just maybe, there's some funny to be had.

What do you folks think? Can Adam Sandler make another funny movie? And can he do it with this all-star Sandler cast?

We're getting more Beverly Hills Ninja. It might be September, but it feels like it's Christmas! Variety reports that the film will be the first mainstream Hollywood flick to shoot in South Korea, but it's still keeping to its roots with the simple name -- Beverly Hills Ninja 2. Written by Mitch Klebanoff (co-producer and writer of the original), who will also direct, the terrible idea will focus on "an orphaned boy who wants to be a ninja but becomes involved in a crime in Hollywood while looking for his real parents." One would think Kevin Farley might be the guy heading this sucker, but no it's DAVID HASSELHOFF. Oh yes, try to resist the Hoff going ninja.

Farley, instead, gets a little something different. What do you do after you run with the cliche of "unattractive" girls who can miraculously become hot with the help of a shunned Playboy bunny? Divorced dudes. Variety reports the director of House Bunny, Fred Wolf, is directing a new flick called Divorced Guys. The comedy, which follows a group of divorced guys who go on a road trip to figure out how their marriages failed, was written by Wolf, Farley, and David Spade, who will also star.

Meanwhile, it looks like Michael Douglas is gearing up for another wacky role that could be worth the time. Variety reports that he's going to "play a car magnate with a runaway libido" in a new film called Solitary Man. More specifically, he's a guy who used to be the owner of a chain of car dealerships until "business and romantic indiscretions" mucked things up. Making the whole thing more intriguing -- Susan Sarandon, Danny DeVito, and Jenna Fischer are in talks to co-star. It's not quite as cool as him playing Liberace, but it'll do.

I'm not sure if this is news that you want to hear, but it's time for another David Spade movie. While the man has had more post-SNL luck than some, that's more due to volume than quality. He just isn't the same without Chris Farley. Nevertheless, his career moves onward, and of course, it helps to have the backing of Happy Madison, Adam Sandler's production company -- they seem to be in the business of keeping SNL alum's careers afloat.

The film, which Spade will write with Fred Wolf, has been picked up by Columbia Pictures. It will cover one weekend at a public park, where three families get involved in a turf battle to snare the same camping spot. It sounds like a cross between If This is It and Beat It, but maybe that's just me. The pair co-wrote Dickie Roberts and Joe Dirt, if that gives you an idea about what to expect. However, there is some promise with the inclusion of Chris Rock as Spade's co-star. Sure, the man was involved with Pootie Tang, but he's also done Dogma and has that popular sitcom. Then again, I think I'm just trying to find the good in this news.

Monday's odds and ends:

• According to England's The Independent, Keira Knightley is going to play Eliza Doolittle. In, well, something -- maybe on stage, maybe on screen. Basically, all anyone knows at this point is that talks are going on, and she's "studying the script madly." All remake rage will be delayed until we know for sure whether it's a movie or not.
• It looks as if all the talk about Sean Connery making a cameo appearance in Casino Royale might have been a bit of wishful thinking. According to Connery himself, apart from contributing his voice to a Scottish cartoon he agreed to participate in months ago, he's retired from acting and will officially announce his decision when the AFI gives him its lifetime achievement award later this year. Gee, that's convenient timing. "All these people here, for me? You shouldn't have. Oh, and I'm retiring. Forever. Love me very much -- and publicly -- right now!"
• The wait is finally over, friends: there will be a Joe Dirt 2. Can I get an amen? How long have we hoped and prayed that this day might come, only to be repeatedly denied by the cruel hand of Hollywood? Now, though, the blessed day has arrived. Master Thespian David Spade reports that he is asked about a sequel to Joe Dirt more than anything else (which, really, isn't saying much -- as Clint at Moviehole points out, how many people are clamoring for another Dickie Roberts?), and that it's been surprisingly successful on DVD. Though Spade doesn't specifically mention a shoot date for the time traveling (yes, I said time traveling) sequel, it sounds like it may go into production this summer -- fingers crossed.
• As Karina mentioned in the podcast this morning, a well-intentioned (I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt there, he could actually be deeply evil) Massachusetts corrections officer has been disciplined for showing Brokeback Mountain to prison inmates. [Insert gratuitous Oz joke here.] According to corrections officials, their objection to the film was not its subject matter but "the graphic nature of sexually explicit scenes" -- apparently men can't even go at it with women on the screens of the Massachusetts big house.
  

Raise your hand if you think David Spade has at least one comedic bone in his body. Since I can't see you through my computer screen, I'm going to go ahead and assume no one moved an inch. Correct?

In an interview with Coming Soon, Spade divulged that a script has been written for Joe Dirt 2 and production may start as soon as this summer. However (and I believe this is yet another one of Spade's hilarious quips), the actor claims they will be skipping part 2 and going directly to part 3. Hurray, one less sequel we need to trash. Maybe I'm wrong here because, apparently, the first Joe Dirt did real well on video and that's why they're even contemplating a second. Okay, fess up - who bought it? I, personally, would like to thank you from the bottom of my darkened heart. So, thanks!

 

Okay, I'm not against older people having hot sex or anything - heck, I hope when I'm 71 I'm still having some wild times. But do we really need to see Shirley Jones, matriarch of The Partridge Family, getting it on with a 24-year-old in the flick Grandma's Boy? I don't think so. In the film, Jones and her housemates, played by Shirley Knight and Everybody Loves Raymond's mom, Doris Roberts, get into a stash of hashish, which they mistakenly think is tea. The old ladies brew up the hash and drink it and, presumably, senior citizen naked romping and other such merriment ensues with a group of "fun loving young men". And no, kids, I'm not making this up.

As if the fact this movie stars both Rob Schneider and David Spade wasn't enough to keep me far, far away from seeing it (unless I'm forced to review it for some karmic injustice I committed in a previous lifetime), old lady stoner sex is definitely the topper. Maybe it's just me, but seeing a movie starring two actors who I would pay to stop making movies, combined with a bunch of horny old grannies getting it on with young men whose idea of "fun" is boffing a bunch of stoned old ladies just isn't my idea of time well spent. What's next? A movie with a "hot lesbian sex scene" with Shirley Jones and Florence Henderson, aka Mrs.Brady? Hey, and then David Cassidy and Barry Williams walk in on them, and boom-chicka-chicka-boing-boing...