Chemistry. It's a word tossed around in plenty of movie reviews, generally to diagnose whether two actors have it or not. Chemistry can be in the eye of the beholder: some critics may disagree, but if the chemistry is really there, it will show in the way the film catches on. No one can deny that Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan had it in When Harry Met Sally, or that William Powell and Myrna Loy, or Woody Allen and Diane Keaton had it in their many films. But for every hit, there are many, many failed experiments. Here are seven of the most (or least) memorable.

1. Fred Astaire and Joan Fontaine in A Damsel in Distress (1937)
For whatever reason, Astaire decided to break up his hit formula with Ginger Rogers and make this movie without her. His new partner? Joan Fontaine, best known for playing mousy, quietly pretty types (Rebecca, Letter from an Unknown Woman, etc.) and definitely not a song-and-dance woman. Poor Joan was taken to the mat for her lack of singing and hoofing, although the film actually isn't that bad. The ultra-witty P.G. Wodehouse adapted his own novel, it won an Oscar for its dance choreography, and it features another great team: George Burns and Gracie Allen.

2. Hugh Grant and Sandra Bullock in Two Weeks Notice (2002)
Every so often some Hollywood executive gets the idea to team up two big stars, hoping that their massive appeal will translate into screen chemistry; it mostly doesn't. These two romantic comedy masters, who have been wonderful in other films with other people, came together like a dull, wet flint, unable to strike even the most meager spark. Another infamous example of this type of casting came in 1986: recent Oscar winners Jack Nicholson and Meryl Streep came together for Mike Nichols' Heartburn. Before it opened, it had lots of buzz. After it opened, it had more of a stench.

I'm not sure how Dolly Parton does it. Despite being the spitting image of an older Barbie, and being a popular Country singer, I still like her. While I wouldn't go so far as to call myself a fan, she definitely holds a place in my heart -- whether she is shocking people with a cover of Stairway to Heaven, running The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, or tying up the snarky Dabney Coleman in 9 to 5. She's got spunk. However, I do hope that my Darling Dolly gets rid of that spiky hair. It's a 'do I had in the fourth grade.

Starpulse has reported that Kristin Chenoweth has gotten a big thumbs-up to play Dolly in a biopic -- from the Smokey Mountain Songbird herself. Chenoweth, who made a name for herself on The West Wing, has had increasingly more prominent roles in film over the past few months, going from an anchorwoman in Stranger Than Fiction to fourth-billed in the new Deck the Halls. Apparently, Dolly will talk to her people, who will likely talk to Chenoweth's people, and it will be a whole people-filled communication fest. This might all be a pipe dream, but I for one would love to see Chenoweth in Dolly's bouffant 'fro from the eighties.

The film seems to only be in the beginning conception stages, but I wonder if it could really come to life. The really notable music biopics contain heart-wrenching stories and other drama. Would creators be able to make a tune we could really sink our cinematic teeth into? Furthermore, do you think Kristin Chenoweth the right choice, or is Ms. Parton totally missing the mark?

Before the aGLIFF screening of For the Love of Dolly, aGLIFF director Lonny Stern posed a question for the audience to consider while watching the film: "Is Dolly Parton the sweetest, nicest person in the world, or the world's largest enabler?" The answer isn't evident after watching this documentary that examines extreme Dolly Parton fandom. Like many contemporary documentaries, the film selects a few representatives on which to focus, and follows these five different people for a year in their assorted quests to get closer to Dolly.

The five fans all have their different ways of loving Dolly. Harrell and Patric are a couple whose house is stuffed full of Dolly likenesses -- the guys claim they had one bedroom that was off-limits to Dolly paraphernalia for awhile, but "she just crept in." Harrell designs and creates dolls in Dolly's likeness, from stitching the intricate costumes to modeling and painting the faces. Melisa and Jeanette devise new butterfly costumes every year to wear to a big parade featuring Dolly in person. Melisa moved to Nashville so she could keep tabs on Dolly and follow her around, and only takes jobs that allow her a flexible schedule to pursue the singer. Jeanette has built a little cabin based on a sliver of wood she stole from Dollywood, that she calls her "Tennessee Mountain home." The floor is stained with a likeness of Dolly and one of Jeanette's favorite dogs. We see video of Jeanette cleaning off Dolly's Walk-of-Fame star, then covering it in lipsticked kisses. David crochets little flyswatters and other knickknacks for Dolly, and has photos and posters of her plastered all over his bedroom.

This year's Kennedy Center Honors have been announced, and they are: film director Steven Spielberg; singer/actress Dolly Parton; singer Smokey Robinson; composer Andrew Lloyd Webber; conductor Zubin Mehta. What an eclectic group that is, and just imagine what kind of project the five of them could collaborate on. If I was in charge of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, I sure would make that part of the ceremony; let them meet and then give them a year with which to work together on something to be shown at the next annual Honors. Unfortunately, I'm not in charge. So, the five honorees will simply receive their accolades at the ceremony, which will be hosted by Condoleezza Rice and attended by the President and First Lady, on December 3rd (to be taped and later broadcast on CBS).

Anyway, just for fun, who can think up the best ingredients to the never-to-exist partnering of these five artists? I'll make it harder: No Bible stories, no lyrics that reference tears, no aliens or war stories and no mention of Dolly's body parts.

Bits and pieces for Thursday:

• According to JoBlo, Jane Fonda visited with Larry King last night, and told him that there are some conversations taking place about a sequel to Nine to Five. While this is among the worst ideas I've ever heard -- is any movie more firmly rooted in its time? -- I have to admit that I'm a sucker for Dolly Parton (Yes, I'm the one person who saw Straight Talk in the theater. Twice.), and will accept even the lamest excuse to watch her be sassy. I would totally go.

• Remember the Jason McElwain? The autistic kid who'd spent two years as a basketball manager, so the coach let him dress for a game his senior year? And he came out raining threes to the delight of his teammates, the fans, and the entire world? Well, we mentioned shortly after the game that his family was being courted by multiple drooling studios -- and now, ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner: Columbia gets to make the Jason McElwain movie.

• Curse that scientologist baby! Tom Cruise was supposed to head off today on a world-wide publicity voyage to promote Mission: Impossible III (which, let's face it, no one will even know exists if he doesn't go talk it up), but the arrival of little Suri is screwing everything up. Cruise has canceled a junket scheduled for LA today, and upcoming stops (including Paris, London, and Rome) are very much up in the air. Katie, if this movie flops, you are in such huge trouble. Couldn't you cross your legs for a few weeks, or something?

During my thirty years as a movie watcher, my relationship with the Oscars has been through three distinct phases. The first, love and respect, involved passionate interest and rooting - in those days, when my picks didn't win I was befuddled, and would spend days talking to friends, sincerely trying to sort out the reasoning behind each disputed decision. When Dances with Wolves wiped the floor with Goodfellas, for example, I figured I must have missed something. What angle was I not getting that those wise members of the Academy had seen?

Eventually, though, I wised up and entered phased two: desperate hatred. The passion remained, but the respect was completely gone. During this period, I was actually thrilled when Forrest Gump won best picture, because it confirmed how stupid all of the voters were, and allowed me to triumphantly unload whatever projectiles were nearby at the television (eventually I armed myself with a hamper full of balled up socks - too many things were getting broken).

Just a few months after the announcement of a Grey Gardens musical (which opens March 7 Off Broadway) comes another report of a movie-to-music adaptation. This time, however, the movie in question is decidedly more frisky: out doing pre-Oscar press for her Transamerica theme, Dolly Parton has been telling the press that she's working on a musical version of 1980's Nine to Five. According to Parton, the show will star a young, 20-something cast and will be set in the same time period as the movie, so you can stop worrying that the big hair and blue eye shadow will be replaced. Additionally, the musical will feature "more romance than the movie," as well as an expanded set of secondary characters. Parton is writing the music, while Patricia Resnick, who co-wrote the screenplay, will pen the show's book. Though no personnel decisions have yet been made, Tony-winner Joe Mantello (who directed both Wicked and Take Me Out) has been mentioned as a possible director for the show.

Parton expects the show hit Broadway some time in 2007.

[via Newyorkology]