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Over there in the blogosphere, Dorian at Post-Modern Barney is making everyone feel a little awkward with a rundown of occasionally offensive yet hilariously accurate plot summaries. I smell the next Twitter novel (hashtag mania!) or a grad thesis that would leave Gilles Deleuze weeping in his po-mo grave. Or a late-night drinking game after all the PC-compliant non-movie nerds leave. Here are a few of my personal favorites -- well, the more PG ones, anyway!

ALIENS: An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER: Teenage serial killer destroys town in fit of semi-religious fervor.

CHINATOWN: Father desires closer relationship with his children.

DONNIE DARKO: Hallucinating teen crushed by airplane engine.

With two of four Futurama movies now behind me, I think I have the formula figured out. If the first flick -- the very amusing Bender's Big Score! -- was a patchwork and episodic affair, then at least it was a choppy good time. It was great seeing the old Planet Express crew in their resurrected form, but since the film was made with perforations ... it was a little bit of a mess. (Basically, each of the four new Futurama flicks were made to be split into four television episodes apiece. And it really shows.)

So there's my biggest and most basic complaint about Bender's Big Score! and doubly so for Movie #2: The Beast With a Billion Backs. That the writers and producers were asked to create four modular-style movies when the fans were pretty much expecting "normal" movies. The kind with three cohesive acts and what-not. Such is definitely not the case with the first two Futurama flicks -- and I expect that it's a slight malady that will continue across Bender's Game and Into the Wild Green Yonder.

So with that obvious complaint out of the way, I can also say that Futurama Movie #2 is really funny, chock-full of unexpected surprises, stunningly animated, and an absolute treat for the old-school fans. If the movie feels more like four inter-connected mini-stories than one big "movie movie," then oh well. It's still great to see the Futurama gang back in action. Especially because they're still so damn funny.

It's not just because he provided the voices souls for such wonderful characters as Fozzie Bear, Grover, Cookie Monster, Miss Piggy and (of course) Yoda that my generation adores Frank Oz. And it's not just because of his strangely amusing cameos in movies like The Blues Brothers, Trading Places and Spies Like Us, either. Nope, it's mainly because Frank Oz is such a consistent comedy director that we keep cheering for the man's efforts. Well, he was really consistent for a while there anyway.

After honing his directorial skills on The Dark Crystal and The Muppets Take Manhattan, Mr. Oz probably got the Little Shop of Horrors gig just because of his vast experience with complicated puppetry. Who knew the guy would deliver one of the slickest, silliest and most entertaining musical comedies ... maybe ever? Three more very solid comedies would follow -- Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, What About Bob? and Housesitter -- before Frank tackled family fare once more with The Indian in the Cupboard. Then he delivered Bowfinger, The Score and The Stepford Wives. After that last effort the man was primed for some redemption.

When you think about horror film directors, Edgar Wright probably isn't the first name that pops into your mind. Sure, if you made a list of some of the best horror films of the past few years, Shaun of the Dead would most likely be on the list, but Edgar Wright has continued to fly under the radar as a name. In April, all that will be changing for two reasons. First, Edgar's new film Hot Fuzz will be released in theaters, and the early buzz is that it's even better than Shaun of the Dead. Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are both in it, and if the trailers are any indication, the buzz is dead-on. If you liked Shaun, then I'm sure you'll love Hot Fuzz. That almost sounds like marketing copy. "If you see one film this year ... then you really need to see more movies."

Secondly, and even more esoteric -- Edgar Wright's trailer for Don't in Robert Rodriguez' and Quentin Tarantino's Grindhouse. There are four trailers altogether through the film, one before the feature rolls, and three in the middle, but the one that had everyone talking after the movie was over was Don't. Without spoiling anything for you, Don't is a perfect example of old trailers for foreign films that would come to theaters during the late 60s and 70s. Because they wouldn't want to reveal to audiences that it was a foreign film with accents (even British ones), the trailer would cut just before any of the characters would speak, and would be extremely heavy on narration from the announcer. Wright's trailer nails it, and is the funniest of the bunch. My advice, don't go to the bathroom between Planet Terror and Death Proof, or you'll miss out on a lot of fun stuff.

I recently got the chance to sit down for a brief one-on-one with Jim Carrey during a press junket (translate: press torture simulator) for The Number 23. If you've never seen a junket before, they're pretty brutal. They invite dozens of members of the press to show up, give them interview slots with the talent, and then stick to their schedule tighter than KFC sticks to their secret spices recipe. Seriously, if they put the people in charge of scheduling these things in some sort of high-ranking position at the airlines, there would never be a late flight again. It's scary how efficiently they are run.

Now, keep in mind that this wasn't going to be the Ace Ventura Jim Carrey, or the Bruce Almighty one, but the darker and more brooding Jim Carrey -- closer to the Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Carrey than any other. I wanted to ask him why his dramatic roles don't perform as well as his comedic ones, but I was worried that he might respond to the question by leaping across the room and tearing my throat out. Of course, this nervousness resulted in me kicking his foot, and finding out that if he was Tommy Lee Jones, I might have been worse for wear.

At any rate, I was ushered into the mysterious hotel room that was decorated in dark motifs for the film, and sat down with what turned out to be a genuinely nervous Jim Carrey. (Because of course, I'm so famous and all, it must have been slightly intimidating for him.) I found him to be real and honest, and he didn't give "canned" Hollywood answers, which I actually half-expected. Maybe the foot-kicking loosened him up. By the way, the Jenny McCarthy questions were "off limits," so I didn't bother asking those. Check out the video, and Jim's long hair, after the jump.

Nostalgia Central has posted a list of 40 things that only happen in the movies, and boy do they have it right on the nose. These are movie truisms like, "It is always possible to find a parking spot directly outside or opposite the building you are visiting." This is most laughably true in Swingers when all of the leads drive to the Dresden Room, a popular bar in Los Angeles, and immediately get parking spaces all next to each other right outside. If you've ever been around that area, it's not the easiest place to park.

"If you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts, your opponents will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around you in a threatening manner until you have defeated their predecessor. " I just recently watched both Kill Bill Vol. 1 and Kung Fu Hustle, and this is the most spot on fact in martial arts films. I've never understood why they don't just bum rush the hero and take him out. Maybe they all use the honorable "take a number" system.

Ever wonder why the hero in a film has no trouble picking people off with his gun, but seems to be bulletproof himself? "One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at once (it's called Stallone's Law)." I knew there had to be science behind it. This explains Lethal Weapon and Die Hard pretty well, finally.

"All beds have special L-shaped sheets that reach to armpit level on a woman but only up to the waist of the man lying beside her." You know, I checked at Linens & Things for these sheets, and then Bed, Bath and Beyond. They all thought I was crazy. I should have brought this list with me as proof.

Check out their full list of things like these. It's good for a laugh, and you'll find yourself thinking about it the next time you watch a movie.

10 Zen Monkeys has a pretty interesting article posted about squirrels, jazz music and Alvin & the Chipmunks. Apparently there's been an Alvin movie in development for a couple of years, spearheaded by Simpsons writer John Vitti.

Although the movie seems to be swirling on the edge of the whirlpool that is "development hell," the article covers some interesting facts. Did you know that the original creator of the Chipmunks, Ross Bagdasarian Sr., first came to fame by recording the song Witch Doctor in 1958? It's no surprise that the witch doctor in the song ("ting tang, walla walla big bang") sounded like Alvin. Bagdasarian would record on a reel-to-reel machine running at half-speed. When the tape was played normally, voila, Chipmunks! The success of Witch Doctor let Bagdasarian play around with the concept, and later in November of 1958, he released The Chipmunk Song. It went on to sell an astounding four and a half million records in seven weeks. From that one song was born the whole concept of Alvin, Simon and Theodore. It gave birth to a television series, tons of merchandise and made an overnight star out of the squeaky-voiced star.

Bagdasarian Sr. died abruptly in 1972, and his son, Ross Jr. and wife Janice, picked up the torch and brought a new Chipmunks series to television in 1983. They have since produced numerous albums and worked on numerous direct-to-video Chipmunk movies including: The Chipmunk Adventure, and Alvin & the mini-Munks. According to the Chipmunks.com site, Alvin & the mini-Munks is a blend of puppetry and CGI that is a work in progress, but it is unclear if this is the same film that Vitti is developing. We're guessing it's not. Hopefully something will happen to bring this project together. It has such an incredible backstory, and Alvin & the Chipmunks are great characters for a family-friendly franchise that needs to be reintroduced to a whole new generation of kids.

ALVIIIINNNNNNNN!

PS - as an added bonus, check out this both creepy and fascinating sound file which plays the Chipmunks at normal speed, and then half speed. You'll hear how Ross Sr. had to speak/sing when recording the Chipmunk lines.

Variety reports that Fox Animation president Chris Meledandri has scooped up the rights to Roald Dahl's Fantastic Mr. Fox, which will be directed by Wes Anderson, based on the script he wrote with Noah Baumbach. The film will be a mixture of several forms of animation, mostly stop-motion. Anderson had been associated with the film as long ago as 2004, when Revolution Studios owned the films rights to the book, and Anderson was planning on working with stop-motion director extraordinaire, Henry Selick.

This slim novella has been a board game, an opera, and will now finally see life as a motion picture, probably sometime in 2009. Animation takes time, and when it's stop-motion it takes even longer. It will be very interesting to see how Wes Anderson handles this movie. I am a huge fan of all his previous work, especially Bottle Rocket. Wes is a quirky director like Paul Thomas Anderson (no relation) who knows how to populate his films with enough character and detail that it seems they take place in an alternate universe, and somewhere you wouldn't mind living.

Hopefully Wes will be able to pull a Tim Burton and direct a terrific stop-motion film that keeps the whimsy of the book, and allows Anderson some room to stretch his legs in an animated fashion.

[Thanks tedz]

Hey, do you guys remember the movie Backdraft? It was about firemen, and I think they were sexy, and Donald Sutherland was pretty good in it, but not as good as he usually is, and Robert DeNiro was in it too, and there was a lot of coughing and crying, I think?

Right, so obviously that movie didn't really stick in my synapses too well. That's okay, because Eugene Mirman, one of my favorite comedians, made a sequel to Backdraft with his comedy pals Jon Benjamin and Sam Seder called Backdraft II: Backdraftier. It's completely unnecessary, and Mirman, like myself, recalls very little from the original movie. I don't think I've laughed this hard since I won that Laughing Contest at the 1987 Ohio State Fair. Take that, three-time Giggle Champion Maynerd Ferbenberger of Akron!

Anyway, you can watch the short film by clicking here.

[via The Onion AV Club blog]