I've had enough. Ever since Fox first announced that Steven Spielberg and Mark Burnett were teaming up to produce a reality show in which aspiring filmmakers competed against one another for $1 million and an "office" at Dreamworks, I was skeptical but interested. Burnett is one of the best in the business at what he does, and Spielberg is, well, Spielberg. Surely, combined, the two would shell out one of the most talked-about reality shows in history, right? Wrong. This thing is a disaster. They can't decide on a consistent format, the host is a babbling mess and we never actually get to watch these kids making films (which, in my opinion, is the most appealing part of the show). Nope, instead, they give us random celebrity judges (out promoting their new movie), half-assed short films (with no explanation as to when or how they were put together) and a slew of contestants who are forgettable five seconds after they walk off stage. How did this happen? How do they fix it? Here are seven suggestions that, if applied correctly, could save On the Lot from its imminent cancellation.

1) Screw the American Idol format and start giving these kids tasks

The show got off to a great start when they asked each kid to come up with an original pitch based on one of five different loglines. Not only did this allow the audience at home to brainstorm their own ideas on how they would pitch the concept, but it gave us something to anticipate. What they should've done from there is maintained this mini-task theme; throw the kids into groups and ask them to make a one-minute film without any dialogue. Have them come up with a two-minute short utilizing three random objects placed in a box that, somehow, would have to be incorporated into the story. Give them a writing challenge. Give them a blue screen challenge. Force them to choose three strangers off the street to use as actors in a completely improvised short. Make this show fun. Make it exciting to watch. While filmmaking is a creative medium, all On the Lot does is take a gigantic piss on creativity by blatantly ripping off other, more successful shows in an attempt to convince the viewer that what they're watching makes sense, when it doesn't.

OMG, did you watch On the Lot last night!? I'll try to refrain from telling you exactly what I think about the show (um, shouldn't Spielberg have been there for the pilot since, ya know -- this is his show?) since Scott will be recapping each episode for us, but I will say that those of us in the Davis household will be rooting for Jessica B. (or Jess) as we've met her before, know she's talented and, well, a girl deserves to win. There, I said it! For those that don't remember Jessica, she was the brunette who was screaming at the other team to move off their set. Go Jess! And don't even get me started on Brett Ratner -- part of me was hoping the dude would throw a stripper or two at the aspiring filmmakers while they were pitching their awesome ideas. "You see, it's a rat who becomes a mouse, and then they go to, uh, a lab ... can I go get my notes?"

Anyway, Variety tells us that Bug director William Friedkin has accepted an invite from Spielberg to serve as a jurist in the horror film section of On the Lot. (Correct me if I'm wrong, but I also believe Wes Craven will be there for that too.) It's a good time for Friedkin to be in the news; his latest flick, Bug (which our own Jette Kernion said "blends paranoia, trust and love into a riveting story, driven by intense characters"), arrives in theaters this weekend. And when you're putting together a horror jury, it can't hurt to have the guy who directed The Exorcist giving notes. The article also mentions the fact that Friedkin has just switched reps (from WMA to Paradigm) and, in doing so, he hopes to concentrate on low-budget films rather than "compete with the guys who are making these $500 million movies." Hey man, as long as you stay away from stuff like Blue Chips, I'm down. On the Lot returns this Thursday when our unique cast of misfits attempt to complete their short films and show them to Ratner, Princess Leia and Garry Marshall.

The drama Georgia Rule just plain doesn't work. At times, it feels like a Lifetime movie-of-the-week, but with a cast that far outclasses the genre. At times, you can see hints of an indie film-wanna-be style, but the characters and setting are too superficial, and the plot twists are too predictable and pat. Even the performances from an experienced cast don't add much life to the film -- in fact, if the performances had been worse, at least the film could have worked as a gloriously tacky melodrama. Instead, the film is a tedious yawn with only a few bright spots.

Wild-child Rachel (Lindsay Lohan) is sent to live with her grandmother Georgia (Jane Fonda) for a few months before she heads off to Vassar, since her mother Lilly (Felicity Huffman) and stepdad Arnold (a sadly unrecognizable Cary Elwes) don't know what else to do with her. Georgia's iron-clad household rules (thus the title) cannot entirely thwart Rachel as she inflicts her brand of chaos on the small Idaho town, including the hot-but-devout-Mormon teen Harlan (Garrett Hedlund) and the older vet for which she ends up working, her mom's ex-boyfriend Simon (Dermot Mulroney). When Rachel confides something personal and devastating to Simon, all hell breaks loose and Lilly is forced to return to her estranged mother's house, where all three women have to learn to deal with one another. Or not.

A bunch of rumors have surfaced over the last month or so that spoke about an alleged Natalie Portman nude scene in her upcoming film, Goya's Ghosts. Of course, fanboys everywhere immediately jumped at the chance to see Queen Padmé Amidala in her birthday suit, re-arranging their lives so they could quietly count down the seconds until said film arrives in theaters. Unfortunately, there's news today that Portman's spokesperson denied the rumors, claiming the scene in question featured a body double and not Portman herself. Oh Natalie, why won't you just take off your shirt already? I mean, didn't you see where it got Halle Berry?

Hey, anyone up for some nasty Lindsay Lohan pics? In an effort to sneak away from her cutesy on-screen persona, Lohan is looking to go all "crazy rebellious teenager" for her latest role in Georgia Rule. And, based on the set pictures leaked online, apparently director Garry Marshall is either creating a deep, meaningful film or simply fulfilling some bizarre Lohan-related fantasy. As far as the pics go, um, let's just say they feature Lohan helping some dude out with his "oral presentation."

Here's some advice: If you're ever invited out for drinks with Jackie Chan, think twice before going. According to reports, the Rush Hour star did some rushing of his own when he drunkenly forced his way on stage during a concert given by Taiwanese singer-songwriter Jonathan Lee. After attempting to perform with the singer, Chan, who was obviously wrecked off his face, began receiving heckles from the audience. The actor reportedly then shout back his own insults. Not for nothing, but I couldn't see myself heckling Jackie Chan, even if he was making an ass out of himself. We've all watched the guy fight sober. Do you really want to take a chance on his drunk-fighting skills? Yeah, I'll let you think about that one while I go fix myself a drink. Shh, don't tell Jackie.

Odds and ends from Friday:

• There's always been something about Cary Elwes that doesn't sit right with me. I'm not exactly sure what, but the dude definitely strikes me as somewhat creepy in a stalker-ish kind of way. Lucky for him, this makes Elwes perfect for the part of the child-molesting step-father in Garry Marshall's upcoming Georgia Rule. The actor recently signed on to the film in which he'll play an all around great guy and husband who, at times, secretly molests Lindsay Lohan, his step-daughter. Sounds peachy.
• 20th Century Fox desperately wants to be cool. And they're proving it by picking up an untitled comedy pitch by Derek Guiley and David Schneiderman. Story is based on a real-life seminar for adults who feel as if they've lost touch with what's "cool" these days. Pic will follow four ad execs who wind up in a high school where they find themselves reverting back to a teenager's mentality. I assume this means there will be tons of note passing, keg-stands and sloppy make-out sessions. Hey, I'm game.
• According to British newspaper Daily Express, Keith Richards begged the producers of Pirates of the Caribbean to let his fellow Rolling Stones bandmates appear in the third installment of the franchise along with him. Richards thought it would be a hoot if Mick Jagger, Ronnie Wood and Charlie Watts could play a vile pirate crew that hangs around Richards' character. Apparently, however, producers denied his request saying the script doesn't allow for it. Not for nothing, but one Rolling Stone is enough. Throw the whole band in there and now you're coming dangerously close to something The Simpsons would do. Just my two cents.

Apparently untroubled by how deeply annoying the once-adorable Lindsay Lohan has become, Hollywood is casting her right and left. Just off her work with the legendary Robert Altman in A Prairie Home Companion, in which Oscar winner Meryl Streep plays her mother, La Lohan has scored herself another award-winning mom in the form of Felicity Huffman. The two have signed on to costar in Georgia Rule, which Garry Marshall will write, direct and produce for Morgan Creek. In the film, Lohan plays a rebellious young woman (a role that will be a true test of her acting chops) who so exasperates momma Huffman that she's sent off to spend the summer with grandma, who will be played by none other than officially back-in-the-game Jane Fonda.

Very little about this project is yet official, but if financing falls into place and all the personnel work out as expected, there are hopes for a summer shoot.