lindsey lohan Tagged Articles at Cinematical

Producer Gary Hamilton, mostly known for direct-to-video crap although he also produced the stellar Aussie horror film Wolf Creek, recently chatted with Page Six about his upcoming film Dare to Love Me, starring Lindsay Lohan, and apparently production on that film has been postponed at the zero hour before cameras were about to roll. "I'm not sure the movie is going to go immediately," he confessed to the gossip rag, while deflecting the obvious question about whether insuring star Lohan was the financial hurdle he couldn't get over. "There's no problem with Lindsay from our perspective," he said. "It's financing the film, which is a separate issue." I wouldn't necessarily take him at his word on that, since even at this stage of the game he couldn't afford to be perceived as slamming his star in the press and it makes too much sense to assume insurance companies balked at backing Lohan, who was spotted chugging champagne as recently as this past weekend.

On the other hand, one look at the movie's bio will make you think that no one would finance this thing if it had Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie attached. The seemingly ill-conceived period piece follows "tango legend Carlos Gardel" who falls in love with a prostitute and gets shot in the lung, but still "seduces crowds with his enchanting voice, bringing Tango music as a liberating voice to Europe." It's being directed by Alfonso Arau, the guy who hit us over the noggin with A Walk in the Clouds back in 1995, and was only recently released from director's jail for that crime. Stay tuned to Cinematical for the latest twists and turns in Lohan's career rollercoaster ride.

A conversation arose in the screening room the other day about the sorry state of young, romantic performers in movies today and the overwhelming blandness slathered across our movie screens. Pretty, plastic, chiseled faces smile at one another and sometimes kiss, and their efforts leave everyone cold. Critics and audiences often use the word "chemistry" to describe these encounters; either the characters have it or they don't. Strangely, there's really no way to tell if it's even there until the movie is finished. You can put two actors in a room together, or screen test them, but none of it comes together until the audience becomes a factor.

One reason most movie couples have been so bland lately is the ever-increasing control that studios are demanding of their product. Every aspect of filmmaking must be regulated and stabilized, and so, to make the most of their romantic stories, these same studio people very simply cast the most beautiful actors they can find. Beautiful people sometimes explode on the movie screen with lots of personality and star power, but just as often, they don't, looking more like polished statues without so much as a heartbeat. James Dean was very handsome, but he had a surprising element, a kind of unpredictability, as well as world-heavy sadness. But James Franco, who played Dean in a TV biopic, has only the looks. As shown in his most recent film, Spider-Man 3 (151 screens), where there should be passion and danger and excitement, there's only grooming. At times I honestly can't tell the difference between him and Paul Walker.

2006 was the first full year of Cinematical, and it was a very busy year for its bloggers. A lot of big news, shocking news and ongoing news kept us busy as we followed the important stories and passed the significant bits onto you. There was good news, bad news, unexpected news and unbelievable news. There were deaths, births, rebirths and remakes. There was so much going on that it takes an amazing film geek to recall everything (have you tested your memory yet?).

But what was the most important story for film in 2006? The end of the box office slump? The Weinsteins' devilish pact with Blockbuster? Peter Jackson's possibilities of directing The Hobbit? Uwe Boll boxing his critics? Sorry, but none of those affected the consciousness of cinema as much as these other stories from the past 12 months:

• Disney Buys Pixar - When 2006 began, the future of Disney's relationship with Pixar was still uncertain. There had been hint of a new deal between the two companies in the last few days of 2005, but nothing was concrete. Three weeks went by, in which time the new year came in and Pixar's stock prices went up, and then finally the first installment of news came through on January 19: Disney would buy Pixar. Three days later, we were reminded that the deal was not yet done, that it was still awaiting approval from Steve Jobs and the rest of the animation studio's board. On January 23, however, it was in the bag: Disney bought Pixar for $7.4 billion. And John Lasseter was named head of Disney animation.
  
  The story didn't end there. Throughout 2006, the effects of the acquisition continued to be felt. First, Toy Story 3 was killed. But then it was greenlit again. Disney closed its new computer animation studio, Circle 7. Then many months went by before Disney fired a whole lot of people working in its animation departments. Finally, just a few weeks ago, the company announced they'd be trying out the ol' hand-drawn stuff again. By year's end, it felt as though Pixar was the one who owned Disney.
  

Bobby is a Palm Sunday story, about a group of strangers congregating in a place where a Christ-figure is expected to pass through and bless those lucky enough to lay eyes on him. The Christ-figure is Robert Kennedy, former attorney general of the United States and presidential candidate until he was felled by assassin Sirhan Sirhan in the kitchen of the Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles during a primary stop. As the time of his arrival draws near, the gathered begin to whisper about miracles Bobby will perform if elected, but no one ever delves into specifics about the man. Instead, it's generally accepted that if you are one of the travelers who has made your way to the Ambassador on this night of nights, then you know what he stands for, and no instruction is necessary. In that regard, Bobby is 'Ben & Jerry's presents Grand Hotel'. It's aimed at only two conceivable audiences: over-50, true-believer, 'it ain't fair, John Sinclair' liberals and 80s-movie buffs who will thrill at seeing Emilio Estevez and Demi Moore reunited on screen.

I have to admit, the reunion scene is a doozy and sure to warm the heart cockles of those who are patiently awaiting a two-disc director's cut of Wisdom. Moore and Estevez play a fringe-showbiz couple, he a manager type, she an over-40 singer who is now reduced to playing hotels like the one that is hosting the Kennedy campaign stopover on the night in question. In their one legitimate scene together, Moore staggers from booze and juts her neck out at the pint-sized Estevez like a dominant hen, while he does that move where his small, round-as-nickels eyes seem to come together another inch or two when he's considering how he's going to get the bottle away from her. Other revelers wandering the hotel during the film include Sharon Stone as a hair-dresser in unkind period make-up, Elijah Wood and Lindsay Lohan as a draft dodger and his hot girlfriend, and Christian Slater as a kitchen manager who openly despises the illegal Mexican workers in his kitchen.

Three major releases today, all screened for critics and, sadly, all pretty bad. Poseidon is forgettable, empty action, Just My Luck is fluff (But ain't that Lindsay Lohan sweet?), and Goal! The Dream Begins is another formulaic sports underdog story.

• Poseidon: Pretty much everyone agrees with James that this remake did away with the cheese and personalities of the original film, and has replaced them with non-stop action. They also, largely, agree that the choice wasn't a very good one (As evidenced by the fact that every single critic mentions Shelley Winters, but can hardly remember anything about the characters in the movie they're reviewing). Well, at least it's not boring. And hey, the effects are good!

• Goal! The Dream Begins: Goal! is a)about soccer, and b)formulaic: on these things, critics agree. Beyond that however, you have to wonder whether these people were watching the same movie. For example, star Kuno Becker is either blindingly talented or a waste of space. By the same token, his character's illegal immigrant status is either a sign of depth and nuance or just another part of the money-hungry studio's effort to broaden the film's appeal. Me, I'm just thrilled to see the phrases "Newcastle United" and "Alan Shearer" in the American media.

• Just My Luck: Yeah, this one's just not very good -- according to most of his critical brethren, James hits the nail on the head when he labels it "fluff" and "not horrible." Those who find good things to say about the movie are entirely focused on Lindsay Lohan who, despite her inability/unwillingness to stay off the gossip pages, remains -- to some, anyway -- a charming, talented actress. (Roger Ebert, in particular, loves her muchly.

... And I want to start writing letters to Joss Whedon immediately proclaiming that casting her will bring him a world of pain. Go ahead, I know all of you closet Lindsay Lohan fans are just dying to scream, "You're being very unfair Mr. Davis!" Right now you're searching the internet for pictures of me to hang underneath that gigantic Freaky Friday poster you hold so dearly, only to throw darts at my forehead and feel good about your aim even though I'm balding ... at a highly alarming rate.

It's okay to feel that way. I deserve it. But I can't just sit here and pretend that Whedon's uphill battle with this project wouldn't end in a deadly fall should this girl land the leading role. Wow, it felt good to get that off my chest. Thanks.

Anyway, Lindsay Lohan was recently quoted as being very interested in the role of Wonder Woman. The 19-year-old actress, who can be seen in such films as the charming Herbie: Fully Loaded and the always delightful adaptation of Every Nightmare I've Ever Had has claimed that she'd like to find more roles to "Show that I have some sort of stretch in me." Could Wonder Woman be one of those roles? "Wonder Woman would be cool. I'm trying to find roles right now that are different to anything I've done to show my abilities ... because most of the things that I've done so far are aimed at younger girls and are light-hearted." You heard it here first folks: Lindsay Lohan hates younger girls. Joss, I hope you're paying attention.

 

Why is it so hard for us to confront our problems? Are we lazy? Do we not have the time? Is it easier to run away from a situation and create larger problems, then it is to face the music? And what's so bad about music? When I was younger, in times of moronic behavior, my parents would always tell me to just "face the music." Instead of agreeing with them, I'd stand there with a puss on my face, expecting Mom to shovel out a boom-box and blast German techno music into my ears until, eventually, I caved.

Nothing against German techno, but that was my idea of bad music. So, in order for my problems to drift away, I figured I'd have to face this music until something clicked...or hurt - like my ears. And then it hit me: As hard as it was to listen to obnoxiously loud German techno music, it was much easier to get it out of the way fast (like ripping off a band-aid) then it was to avoid. Why let this uncomfortable anger towards German techno music ruin my entire day? They have a right to express themselves. And so do I.

While the above probably makes no sense whatsoever, so does avoiding your problems. So, while I call up the Lifetime Channel and pitch them "How I Learned to be a Better Person by Listening to German Techno Music," why don't you check out the following films. Put the suicide note down, we're running from our problems on this week's Trailer Park...