When I spoke with After Dark Films' Courtney Solomon not long ago, he told me it wasn't fair to label Captivity as a "torture porn" because, quite simply, there's no porn in the movie. While that may be the case, it certainly doesn't mean there can't be porn at the film's premiere party. Solomon recently told The New York Times that he's planning one of the craziest, most politically incorrect premiere party's in history; one that will take place at the West Hollywood club Privilege and feature, among other things, "the three 'most outlandish' SuicideGirls available from the punk porn service." I'm not exactly sure what that means, but apparently the craziest of the SuicideGirls once set a restaurant in Portland, Ore. on fire. According to Solomon, a few lucky fans will get to escort these SuicideGirls to the party under two conditions: "People take the date at their own risk, and everybody on the Internet gets to watch." Yay for us ... I guess.

Okay, so we have the porn, but what about the torture? Fear not my friends, Solomon also promised "individuals in torture gear" who will wonder through the club grabbing people. Classy! Not only that, but some nice friendly cage fighting (featuring a dude named Kimbo Slice) is also on the agenda. Regarding aspects of the extravagant event, which Solomon admits are "probably not legal," he says it's his "personal little tribute" to all the women's groups who are opposing the film. Another interesting note in the article is the fact that Captivity will screen only once prior to its release -- not for critics, mind you, but for women's groups in New York. Following the screening, Solomon wants to "engage in a town-hall-style debate with detractors." A few women's groups, like the National Organization for Women, have already declined the invitation. Apparently, they're not interested in giving the film more free publicity.

We're not exactly sure how you fans can attend said party; the NYT states that most of the folks in attendance will be fans "who can cycle through the club free in groups of 50, along with an expected army of Web-based video bloggers." I envision it to be some sort of warped Torture Porn Haunted House -- and if Cinematical receives an invite, you bet we'll be sending one of our craziest West Coast correspondents to the event. Stay tuned ...

Someone has made a terrible mistake  – they've leaked a partial list of this year's Sundance parties to us nerds. Since most of us on the Cinematical/Blogging Sundance team like to check into our hyperbolic chambers by 11 at the latest, we thought we'd pass this highly classified information on to you. We'll update this list daily until the Festival ends or the Party Gods strike us down (whichever comes first). Feel free to post your own party deets and gossip in the comments.

Friday Night, Jan. 20

6:00PM
Opening Gala Salt Lake City
Jeanne Wagner Theatre, 138 West Broadway
Salt Lake City, Utah

7:00PM
Starbucks Salon (curated by Gen Art)
449 Main Street

9:00pm
Slamdance Opening Party
Star Bar, The Night Club 268 Main St.

9:00 PM Blender Sessions at Tao (formerly Harry O's)
427 Main Street

9:30 PM – 1:00 AM
ICM Party
Premiere Lounge 573 Main St.

11:30 PM
Weinstein Co.
Lucky Number Slevin Party, Village at the Lift
825 Main St.