Ooo-wee, that Uwe makes good copy. Happily, those who have responded to the petition to get Uwe Boll to step away from the camera now have more than one force of opposition: a second petition to keep Dr. Uwe in his current line of work. Cinematical's Erik Davis caught the beleaguered Boll's plea for support on April 9, and yet another fan has responded: Lauren Brenner of Greyface Media is the sponsor behind this noble petition: "after all, he's better than that hack Scorsese." Boll couldn't have said it better. (In case you were wondering, the first pro-Boll petition is here, and so far there are almost 4,000 signatures.)

Oh wait, he did: he's not a bleeping retard like Michael Bay, and he isn't making the same bleeping movie again and again like Eli Roth, as the good doctor was saying ... So far, four cineastes have signed this (hopefully 100% on-the-level) petition. Now, are these four names going to count against the 194,000 so far who who have signed the Stop Dr. Uwe Boll Petition? I know those looking for a 2009 release of In the King's Name Again, Already will want to add their email addresses in hopes of being solicited by hapless Nigerian ex-ministers of finance and providers of natural sex herbs. Thanks to Glenn Creamer for this tip.

Which side are you on: Pro Boll or anti Boll?

Seems like Dr. Uwe Boll has been navigating the globe for about seven months with his Postal / Seed double feature tucked under his arm. He pops up at various festivals and conventions, shows off his new masterworks, and then hops a plane to another continent. And he does lots of interviews, most of which are pretty damn amusing. The latest Q&A with the king of krapola appears on FEARnet, and it's there you'll find some solid questions about animal abuse, Nazi humor, and all those crazy German tax shelters.

But the best part of the interview comes near the end. It goes a little lot something like this:

"FEARnet: Are you aware that there is a petition online, signed by 18,000 people, requesting that you stop making movies?
Boll: Yeah, I know that. 18,000 is not enough to convince me.
FN: How many would it take?
Boll: One million. Now we have a new goal."

So there you have it, ladies and gentlemen. Uwe Boll has thrown down the gauntlet. If we can get another 980,000 signatures on THIS PETITION, then we will have done our part for the advancement of global cinematic culture. No more BloodRaynes or Houses of the Dead or Dungeon Sieges. If this isn't a worthy cause, I really don't know what is. Maybe if we get two million signatures we can get the guy's retirement to include the "producer" title. Don't wait to sign the thing: Boll already has Tunnel Rats, Far Cry, Zombie Massacre and BloodRayne 3 in production.

Postal hits limited release in late May, and (according to Dread Central) Vivendi Home Entertainment will unleash the Seed DVD in September.

Hokey smokes, Al Cabino sure does like sneakers. The young man, who chooses to remain silent about himself, is not at all silent when it comes to his love of footwear, and especially his quest to convince Nike to create a pair of shoes based on the swanky footwear worn by Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future II. I mentioned this back in December, and also opined that such online petitions rarely get results. Those in the sneaker biz tend to agree, claiming the shoes would be more for show than anything and not serve any useful function. Yeah, well, Cabino doesn't care. He's garnered over 3,700 signatures, some of which are allegedly from such big names in the recording industry as Lupe Fiasco, DJ AM, and Billions McMillions. Personally, I'd rather have a pair of Inspector Gadget shoes. Now those would come in handy.