Times may have changed, but for years conversationalists who knew nothing about France except that french fries came from there always had a great fall back position: "You know, they worship Jerry Lewis movies." Cecil Adams of The Straight Dope analyzes the urban legend, while passing on some of his own notions regarding "highbrow critics (the only kind France has)".

When I was Paris once, I can remember reading the newspaper Le Figaro's review of "Allo Maman, C'est Moi Encore" (Hi Mom, It's Me Again better known as Look Who's Talking Too). The review began, as I recall, "What's more droll than a talking baby? Two of them!" Sheesh, that's more highbrow than Richard Roeper even! The Lewis libel is what is the novelist Gustave Flaubert called "a received idea," a bit of folk wisdom passed down uncritically from one ignoramus to another.

Chalk up another missed opportunity for Lindsay Lohan, as it now appears the gal will not be starring in the upcoming flick Poor Things, no matter what Shirley MacLaine tells us. Lohan originally dropped out last year when she was admitted to rehab (first or second trip for her, I forget?), and now according to The Hollywood Reporter, they're looking at Brittany Murphy as a possible replacement. I say 'looking at' because negotiations with Murphy haven't even begun yet; she's just one actress they're eying for the role. Poor Things also has a new director in Scott Marshall (Blonde Ambition), who replaces Ash Baron-Cohen after the dude dropped out over "creative differences."

Poor Things tells the story of two female con artists who befriend and then murder homeless men for their insurance policies. Sounds interesting enough, although I never knew the homeless were known for their phenomenal insurance policies. The film already stars Shirley MacLaine and Olympia Dukakis (as the two female con artists, I believe), as well as Rosario Dawson and Channing Tatum. HR also says that Murphy was cast in Sin City 2; a project we haven't heard much about as of late. I assume she'll be reprising her role from the first film. No word on when Poor Things will finally go into production, but we'll let you know.

You would have thought that by now 20th Century Fox would have given up on the idea of a Dallas movie. What with casting changes and script overhauls -- not to mention a mediocre fan reaction to the whole idea in the first place. Now it looks like yet another snafu has hit the production. Page Six (the Mecca of gossip) is reporting that John Travolta has been dropped from the cast and replaced by Ben Stiller in the role of J.R. Ewing. According to Page Six's sources, Travolta was "let go about two weeks ago. He had the role of J.R. Ewing taken from him" -- ouch! But don't feel too bad for Travolta; the same sources went on to say that, "John was given a nice seven-figure 'gift' to go away quietly".

So if you are still keeping track, Travolta is officially the last remaining element of the original Dallas film that Fox had planned back in 2006. Originally the film was going to be a big-budget drama with an all star cast including Jennifer Lopez and Shirley Maclaine. Cut to one year later and the budget shrunk from $65 million to what is now described as "much less" and the cast has been scrapped. Also, instead of a drama, Fox changed directors to hire Betty Thomas to make a comedic 'behind-the scenes' version of the series. This would probably explain how Stiller got involved in the film, since he's almost as an unlikely a choice for the role as Travolta was in the first place. Stiller's reps have yet to comment on his involvement, so stay tuned to Cinematical for updates.

Now that Lindsay Lohan is officially out of rehab (and wearing a "Thou Shalt Not Do Anything Stupid" ankle bracelet), the girl should have plenty of time to start shooting the dark comedy Poor Things; that film starring Shirley MacLaine we told you about back in May. Remember how there was talk Lohan would be replaced in the flick, until MacLaine came to her rescue and issued a bizarre statement, saying they were rearranging the schedule of the film so Lohan can shoot her scenes following the 30-day stint in rehab? Remember all that? Well, according to one of the most reliable sources in the world (ahem, Page Six), the plug has been pulled on Poor Things for good. As in, the movie is dead. Page Six cites an email from production designer Fontaine Beauchamp Hebb (I'd like to see that on a birth certificate) to product vendors GE and Dell (both of whom were promised placement in the film in return for cash) that came attached to the subject line: "Poor Things has been cancelled."

Apparently, the body of the email read as follows: "Sorry to be the harbinger of bad news, but I just received a call from Jacky Gilardi, the producer, pulling the plug on the ill-fated film. Apparently, Ms. Lohan's antics in Las Vegas over the weekend have scared the bond companies and all of the funding has been pulled . . . I look forward to working together in the future and trust our next project will not be as fraught with difficulty." It should be noted that one of Lohan's friends called bullsh*t on the email, telling Page Six the actress had nothing to do with the movie shutting down. Says the friend: "It was a mess to begin with. They randomly fired Channing Tatum for Giovanni Ribisi, and then financing fell through because producers spent money like water. It was only supposed to cost $4 million -- Lindsay was being paid nothing for that role." As expected, everyone involved with the film declined to comment. So until final word comes through, I'd say you should chalk this one as another "Lohan ruined everything" rumor. Poor thing ... even when she's sober, she can't catch a break.

If you just returned from vacation in Helsinki, here's a recap of Lindsay Lohan Week. It started last Friday when, after the release of her new stripping clip from I Know Who Killed Me, the trades announced that Lohan had locked in a new role, in the 'elderly robbers' comedy Poor Things. In my post, I noted that it had been a good week for Lohan -- there were "no wild, out of control antics to report this week." Silly me. Later that night, Lohan ran her Mercedes up onto a curb and fled. The cops tracked her down at a local hospital, she was arrested, and then she checked into rehab, which threw her status in the new film in jeopardy -- a fact her publicist owned up to. One of the other stars of the film, Shirley MacLaine, subsequently released a statement of her own, saying the producers were trying to accommodate Lohan and help her with the "blending of mind, body and spirit." Groovy. Who knows what next week will bring? Until then, here are some samplings from the Lohan oeuvre to discuss.

Herbie: Fully Loaded No, she does't play Herbie. I've never seen so many fifty year-old men, sans kids, standing in line for a kids' movie in my life as I did for this one. I ended up seeing something else, but I know Michael Keaton has a role in this, cashing a check as Lindsay's dad, and Matt Dillon plays the heavy, if there's such a thing in a movie about a magical Volkswagen. If Herbie could talk, would he have a German accent?

A Prairie Home Companion I saw this one last year and remember thinking that Lohan did a fine job of handling the workload of an Altman picture, which is considerable. She seemed to be bearing down and trying, and did a good job of mixing in with the large ensemble cast. She certainly brings more to the movie than Virginia Madsen's ill-conceived Angel of Death character. Let's give credit where credit is due.

Just My Luck This is a weird one, which I caught the first half of on cable not long ago. Lindsay plays a young, upscale Manhattanite who angers the gods and becomes the unluckiest woman in the world. Not unlucky, as in, she suddenly becomes un-rich or un-gorgeous or anything serious like that. More like 'I got splashed by cab!' kind of bad luck. She has an opposite, a guy who had terrible luck and suddenly gets good luck after coming in contact with her, but I havent watched far enough to find out what happens yet.

We now know what project Lindsay Lohan will be dropping out of next -- Poor Things, a comedy about a gang of grannies with Shirley MacLaine and Olympia Dukakis as said grannies. Lohan, Rosario Dawson and Channing Tatum have all joined the film, though I can't quite figure out why. Since the script seems to focus mainly on the grannies and their various gang-like activities -- Variety isn't clear on what kind of activities, exactly -- what kind of parts will there be for the twenty-somethings? The script, by Trent Haaga who wrote -- I kid you not -- Citizen Toxie, is supposedly inspired by some real headlines about some grannie gangs who were involved in everything from insurance scams to drugs and murders, but the whole thing sounds frankly made up to me. Someone show me a newspaper item about a ruthless gang of grannies terrorizing our streets.

Shooting on the film is set to begin next week, and Dawson could presumably have to work around Sin City 2, which is prepping for a summer start. As for Lohan, she's currently getting a lot of attention for the stripping video we reported on earlier, put up as part of the blog for her new film I Know Who Killed Me, but other than that, no wild, out of control antics to report this week. If and when Lohan does decide to dump these grannies, Sienna Miller will probably be standing by to take over and Cinematical will be there to report on it.

It has been 8 years since Shirley MacLaine and Olympia Dukakis last acted together in Leelee Sobieski's Joan of Arc. However, what you probably remember is their collaboration in a film 10 years before; the many-hanky chick flick, Steel Magnolias. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the two Oscar winners are now in talks for a third collaboration and second feature film -- Poor Things -- and I don't think it's the type of movie that you'd expect them to star in. While neither have been signed, I'm sure it's only a matter of time since MacLaine is one of the producers, alongside Rob Hickman of Still Rolling Productions.

Hickman collaborated on the story with Troma actor/screenwriter/everyman Trent Haaga (Zombiegeddon, Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV). How a Troma man came to be connected that closely to MacLaine is beyond me. However, that actually makes me more intrigued about the actresses being involved, since the story is based on true, murderous events. It is a black comedy about two female con-artists who befriend and kill homeless men to cash in on their life insurance policies. Considering Haaga's previous work, I'm sure we can expect at least a little camp. The project already has a director attached as well -- Ash Baron Cohen. Described on IMDb simply as "Ash," he is the brother to that crazy faux Kazakhstanian, Sacha. This seems almost too crazy to be real, which has me sold on the idea.

For the past half century, Harvard University's Hasty Pudding Theatricals has honored the greatest names in entertainment. Since 1951, it has given its Woman of the Year award to Katherine Hepburn, Shirley MacLaine, Meryl Streep and others of tremendous talent. In 1967, it began handing out a Man of the Year award, too. Recipients have included Paul Newman, James Stewart, Robert DeNiro and Steven Spielberg. This year's winners are Scarlett Johansson and Ben Stiller.

Now, I know I could be in the minority here, but I just don't see Johansson and Stiller being in the same boat as some of the past honorees. But I think maybe the theater group hasn't chosen Johansson specifically for her acting (or her gallbladder). I think they just want the "Sexiest Woman Alive" to lead their parade (perchance in a Cinderella costume?). As for Stiller, well, I'm sure he should be a fun guy to have around at a premiere party for HPT's latest theatrical production. He isn't the first comedy star to be honored, and at least he's still in his prime, unlike 1993 honoree Chevy Chase.

Looking through the list, it seems most of the elder greats have already been given awards in the past, but surely there must be somebody more deserving than these two. Okay, granted Stiller is a huge box office success this year, though his draw is likely temporary, but Johansson hasn't shown herself to be a great actress and so far she's been "box office poison." Who should have gotten the awards instead?

Odds and ends from Thursday:

• According to a story in Star magazine, Jennifer Lopez has abruptly dropped out of the big-screen remake of Dallas, based off the classic TV show. In the film, Lopez was set to star as J.R. Ewing's alcoholic wife Sue Ellen, opposite John Travolta. No word yet on why she bailed, but it's certainly not the first time someone has left the production. Earlier this year, director Robert Luketic (Legally Blonde) quit after he was upset over casting choices. Hmm, I wonder if Lopez was one of the choices he was upset about. Shirley MacLaine and Luke Wilson are currently in negotiations to round out the cast. Personally, why not throw Sharon Stone in the Sue Ellen role -- she'd make a great alcoholic. Casino, anyone?
• Universal has snatched up rights to the comic book, The Leading Man, with Marc Platt Prods. and Closed on Mondays Entertainment set to produce. Comic, which is written by B. Clay Moore and illustrated by Jeremy Haun, revolves around the adventures of the world's biggest movie star, Nick Walter. Story follows Walter as he "uses his celebrity, access, lifestyle and his films' international location shoots as a cover for his real job, that of an international spy." Pic sounds fun, but I would imagine they would need a huge A-list celebrity to make this believable. Brad Pitt, maybe? George Clooney would also be fun to watch in a role like this. Thoughts? Opinions?
• The last thing I expected to come out of this whole Mel Gibson debacle was a movie rumor, but that's exactly what Moviehole reported on Thursday. Word around Warner Bros. is they've been down with shelling out another Lethal Weapon sequel for a couple years now, except Mel Gibson refused to be involved. Seeing as the franchise depended on Gibson reprising his role as Sergeant Martin Riggs, the sequel lost steam. However, with projects disappearing faster than Gibson's career, some folks are saying the actor may now jump onboard a Lethal Weapon 5, if only because it would be a good film to help win back some of his fanbase. Makes sense, no?

   • Big Momma's House 2 - In Martin Lawrence's desperate minstrel show, the comedian reprises his role as undercover FBI agent Malcolm Turner, again donning a fat suit to become the sassy, black Southern matron Big Momma. He has to stop a potentially destructive computer hacker, and the movie is broad, shameless and pandering in most every respect. Lawrence appears to assume that we automatically like him and Big Momma, and does little to endear them to us any further. Incessant mugging, weak slapstick and Teflon catchphrases fill in the many cracks of its already shaky foundation, leaving a hammy house of horrors that should have been condemned when it was still a half-baked pitch.
    • Grandma's Boy - Adam Sandler's longtime second-banana, Allen Covert, gets his shot at a lead in this stoner comedy, but despite his appealing, aw-shucks demeanor, the movie, about a 36-year-old video game tester who moves in with his grandmother and her two roommates, is just irredeemably stupid. It is sad to see three lovely ladies like Doris Roberts, Shirley Jones and Shirley Knight stooping for laughs like this, though based on the fact that practically no one saw it in theaters (or will go out of their way to rent the DVD), it is a very minor tragedy.