splinter Tagged Articles at Cinematical

I know, it's been a while since I've written one of these gore-soaked missives, but the upside to that is ... we have a lot to talk about! And since I wrote this during a lazy Sunday (happy belated holidays, btw) I figure it's time to break out the candy-coated bullet points! Let's start out with a freaky fistful of upcoming DVD releases:

Currently strewn across shelves are Donkey Punch and Vinyan, two festival-heavy horror films that couldn't possibly be more different. One's about venal young jerks, and the other is about heartbroken (but stupid) parents. Really bad things happen to all of them.

This Tuesday we're getting the old-school-style monster movie Splinter, which is really quite good. If you like prickly monsters, that is. On the same day ... whoa. It looks like someone actually bothered to exhume flicks like Repossessed, Slaughter High, and My Best Friend Is a Vampire. That sound you just heard was my Netflix queue getting fatter.

Come the 21st we get J.T. Petty's The Burrowers, which played (and played well) at last year's Fantastic Fest, and Robert Hall's Laid to Rest, which is sort of like a non-snarky slasher throwback with a hint of Phantasm-style weirdness. Couldn't find a stranger double feature than these two, believe me.

And mark your calendars, gore-lovers, for April 28, because that's when Martyrs finally hits R1 DVD. According to the UK poster, Scoot Weinberg says it "makes Saw look like Sesame Street," which is one of the most shameless blurbs I've ever heard. Even if the guy is correct, brilliant, and really handsome. (Trust me, this is one rough horror movie.) Also on this Tuesday we'll get the unofficial Donnie Darko sequel, and a movie starring Amber Benson called One-Eyed Monster. I leave the jokes to you fine folks.

When we were kicking around ideas for year-end superlative Cinematical Sevens, I was proudly tasked with chronicling the year's finest in big-screen mayhem, violence, destruction and other such shenanigans. When I was kicking around ideas for said feature between me, myself, and I, there were too many titles to leave off the list, so instead of highlighting only a mere couple of movies, I've opted to sort these puppies out by specific manner of cinematic excess.

So there.

1. Most pervasive destruction - The Joker may have terrorized Gotham to the tune of a destroyed hospital, a wrecked helicopter, a sunken SWAT truck, a toasty fire engine, and a golden district attorney, but even he can't top the Cloverfield monster's swath of destruction across the real-life Gotham. Statue of Liberty? Gone. Brooklyn Bridge? History. Central Park? Adios. And that's not including all the Hollister stores that our protagonists might've fled to. (On a smaller scale, though, Inside's lady in black terrorizes a pregnant woman on Christmas Eve to the point of all but painting every last wall in her house with the blood of her victims. Gotta love the French!)

The Sci-Fi Channel plays a lot of really crappy new genre movies. We know it, they know it ... and yet still the assembly line of cinematic detritus continues unabated, peppered with titles like Anaconda 3, Monster Ark, and Kraken: Tentacles of the Deep. Most of the "Sci-Fi Originals" are films that they bought or bankrolled at a low price -- and yeah, they're generally perfect for bored Saturday night viewing, provided you have a beer or a bong close by.

But according to Fango, the network just signed a deal to air three (slightly) more well-known properties. The first will be Simon Hunter's The Mutant Chronicles, which stars Thomas Jane and Ron Perlman. (I've seen this one. It's ... not great.) Then we'll get a nifty little gimmick thriller called 100 Feet, in which Famke Janssen is harassed by an evil spirit while she spends time on house arrest. Lastly, Magnolia's slick monster movie Splinter, which got a cursory theatrical release last month, will also play on Sci-Fi. Looks like we're holding until about June of next year though...

...which kinda stinks because I want to add Splinter to my DVD collection.

The Halloween weekend scared up frighteningly weak numbers for bigger studio releases. How did independent films fare?

Winners:
1. My Name is Bruce (Image)
2. Noah's Arc: Jumping the Broom (Logo)
3. Religulous (Lionsgate)

Let's hear it for Bruuuuce! (Not, not Springsteen.) Ladies and gentlemen, the fabulous Bruce Campbell debuted at the top of the heap among limited releases, with a per-screen average of $18,800, according to estimates compiled by Box Office Mojo. Opening at one theater in New York, My Name is Bruce features Campbell as both star and director. Campbell's site lists upcoming screenings and appearances by The Man Himself.

Romantic comedy Noah's Arc: Jumping the Broom fared well in its second week of release, making an estimated $14,820 per screen, representing a normal drop of 50%. Are there enough loyal fans of the Logo TV series out there to support a wider release? It will expand to Detroit, Houston, San Francisco, Palm Springs, and Ocean, New Jersey on Friday; the official site has complete theater information.

Now in its fifth week, Religulous continues to draw audiences eager to see Bill Maher's take on organized religion. Earning $1,358 per screen, the film has grossed $11,452,000 so far; it recently became the highest-grossing doc of the year and is among the top 10 highest-grossing docs of all time, according to Docsider.

Not Winners / Indie Horror Scorecard:
1. Dear Zachary (Oscilloscope)
2. Splinter (Magnolia)
3. Eden Lake (Third Rail)

Despite our editor-in-chief's highest recommendation, Dear Zachary only made $2,800 at its single engagement. Perhaps word-of-mouth will build? That's still better than highly-regarded horror pic, Splinter, which managed only $2,200 each at four theaters (per Leonard Klady), or well-reviewed Brit thriller Eden Lake, which got dumped by the Weinsteins onto their loss-leader distribution arm Third Rail Releasing and drew just $550 per screen at 10 theaters.

Boo! And I mean "boo" in the Halloween sense, not in the "opposite-of-hooray" sense. The multiplexes have plenty of films geared toward this sacred holiday season, but so do the art houses! The Indie Spotlight is here to tell you what's opening in limited release this weekend, and there are a couple of frightfests in the mix. Just because it's not on 3,000 screens doesn't mean it can't scare the skittles out of you.

Here's the lineup today: Able Danger, Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father, Eden Lake, The First Basket, The Matador, The Other End of the Line, and Splinter. And here's the lowdown on each of them, in my own highly subjective order of preference.

Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father
What it is: An emotionally devastating documentary made by a man after his best friend was murdered.
What they're saying: We've been raving about this film ever since Erik Davis saw it at Slamdance back in January. It's one of the most powerful films I've ever seen, and I know about a dozen people who've seen it who would say the same thing. A few of them are at Rotten Tomatoes, where the film currently stands at 100%. See this movie.
Where it's playing: New York City (Cinema Village).
More info: The official site lists upcoming release dates in other cities

Splinter
What it is: A grisly horror flick about four young people who are terrorized by a parasitic creature.
What they're saying: Ten out of twelve critics at Rotten Tomatoes give it a thumbs-up, saying it's an efficient, creative B-movie -- exactly what it's supposed to be.
Where it's playing: New York City (City Cinemas Village East), Austin (Dobie Theatre), Los Angeles (Mann Chinese), Dallas (Studio Movie Grill), Oklahoma City (Museum of Art).
More info: The official site has upcoming release dates, plus info on how you can watch the film through some cable systems' on-demand service.

Bruce McDonald's Pontypool, which is a horror film that played TIFF but not in the regular horror section, now has a trailer. Get the info and a trailer link over at Twitchfilm. Flick looks pretty cool to me. Speaking of promo clips, Shock has one for Jamie Blanks' remake of Long Weekend, which is viewable right here.

Ji-woon Kim's very good A Tale of Two Sisters is about to spawn a remake of its own. It's called The Uninvited, it stars Elizabeth Banks, and MTV Movies Blog has an exclusive clip. And Bloody-D has new photos from Dread, the upcoming Clive Barker adaptation, while Arrow has some new shots from this weekend's Splinter.

Dread Central reports that Dominic Sena's graphic novel adaptation Whiteout, which stars mega-hottie Kate Beckinsale, has been pushed back to next September. And Shock has some news on the DVD front regarding Eden Lake and a handful of old-school WB double features.

And yes, the guy who directed the mega-harsh Martyrs will now be the guy behind the Hellraiser remake, says THR. Lastly, here's a pretty cool list of relative obscurities from the genre freaks at Bloody-D.

I've been pretty impressed with our teams' Casting Bites pieces, so I thought I'd borrow the format and use it for genre-style news that might not be HUGE information, but is interesting enough (to me) to bear repeating.

For example, I knew that director Jon Knautz was planning hoping to turn his scrappy little Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer into a franchise, but now we're getting some early details on where Mr. Brooks might be headed next. The filmmaker promises more action the next time around, plus they have a few unlikely partners for the angry hero to deal with. The screenplay isn't finished yet, but apparently the project is a go. (Check out this report at Filmstalker for more.)

Also, a very cool little horror flick called Splinter is opening this weekend in limited release, and if you're the sort who doesn't mind driving a few extra miles for your claustrophobic bio-terror monster movies, then you'll be pleased to hear about my raves, the equally enthusiastic thoughts from Variety, and a bunch of nifty gizmos at the flick's official site. Yay, that was all one sentence. (Oh yeah, and Splinter is available via video-on-demand in several markets, so check the official site for more info.)

Ever seen the original Saw? No, not the feature-length flick. The short. If not, click here.

The director of The Killing Gene (aka WAZ) has a new flick called The Children, which as far as I know is not a remake of this film. Check out that trailer here.

New website for the Friday the 13th remake. Also, New Line just announced a triple-feature DVD of their Jason titles, so check out that stuff at Shock.

Also, check out Joe Leydon's review of Anaconda 3: The Offspring. This sort of stuff is beneath Leydon, but he's really good at writing about crap movies.

Last but not least: My awesome pals at EFC have put together an article called Halloween Treats, in which a few under-the-radar offerings are made to Samhain. Oh, and this is handy. The new & improved Horror's Not Dead blog has a weekly recap of its own. Expect to see this linked again. (Thanks to our own Willy G. for the nifty banner. More to come.)

I've done reports on the After Dark horror series, the Asylum assembly line, and the monumentally moronic Maneater collection -- so I see nothing all that strange about throwing a little genre love towards Magnet's new Six-Shooter Series. (The only difference this time around is that we're going to be talking about GOOD genre films.)

To those who demand to know what the hell phrases like "Magnet Six-Shooter" mean, here's an explanation: Magnolia Films recently kick-started a genre-intensive division (called Magnet Releasing), and the guys are pretty psyched about their next six flicks. There, I've just demystified the phrase "Magnet Six-Shooter." You all owe me three dollars. And here's what's coolest about a six-flick genre series that's run by Magnolia Pictures: You'll actually get something EXOTIC out of the mix.

To use the finest example imaginable, it is Magnet Releasing that was lucky enough to land U.S. distribution rights for the stunningly awesome Let the Right One In, which is dazzling people all over the festival circuit. (And that was a great roll of the dice, as Magnolia grabbed it well before it was earning 5-star reviews across the board.) The film will open in limited release on October 24, but be sure to keep an eye out for the DVD as well. This flick is a keeper for sure.

We have an exclusive first look at five new wallpapers from TMNT -- that's the upcoming CGI Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie for those of you whose stores of T-U-R-T-L-E power are currently depleted. The wallpapers are of the four Turtles -- Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello and Raphael -- as well as their rodent mentor Splinter. The dimensions below each image denote the size of the wallpaper. To save the wallpaper as your computer's background simply click on the appropriate size, right-click on the image that appears and click "Set as background" -- and you should be good to go. Enjoy -- and remember to eat your pizza. TMNT hits theaters March 23.

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