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Steve Carr To Direct 'Short Circuit' Remake
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When I first began writing at Cinematical, I was certain I would remember every single news story that I had written, and would be able to call up every single project at a moment's notice. I think that ability lasted six months. So when there's news about the Short Circuit remake, I have to shake my brain a bit to remember that it's actually a real thing. If I feel that way, you probably do too, and will feel a similar jolt when you hear that Short Circuit: The Remake* has a director. Yes, it's being remade, and they consider Wall*E to be its promotional reel. Now Variety reports that it can boast Steve Carr as its director.Carr is perhaps best known for bringing the world Paul Blart: Mall Cop, a film that shook the winter cinema for weeks and weeks on end. Now he'll be directing the "subversive" Short Circuit that was penned by Dan Milano. At last, Variety tells just what Dimension Films considers to be a radical script: "Built by the military to be a highly sophisticated weapon, Johnny 5 develops a conscience and personality after being hit by lightning. He befriends a lonely boy and his fractured family."
So, in other words, it's the plot of just about every lost puppy / cat / alien movie ever made between 1980 and today. Even worse, it sounds suspiciously like it borrowed all its shocking new element (a lonely boy) from The Iron Giant or even T2: Judgement Day. Perhaps every film that came before this remake was its promotional reel. It's all been leading up to this one, folks.
*Not its official title by any means. It's my own.
Carr Directing 'Mall Cop'
When news first came about Mall Cop, it was clear it had to be a kids' movie. Reminiscent of Home Alone, it features a burglary attempt at a mall. But it stars Kevin James rather than a kid or bunch of kids as the person who thwarts the criminals' plan. Still likely a slapstick-heavy comedy, it just doesn't have the same appeal as a movie where kids outsmart adults. Then Steve Pink, who co-wrote Grosse Pointe Blank and High Fidelity, came on board to script the thing. Suddenly it sounded like it could be a little wittier than originally expected. However, now we're back to square one, because Variety reports that Mall Cop will be directed by Steve Carr. In case you aren't familiar with the guy's work, here's a sampling: Dr. Doolittle 2; Are We Done Yet?; Daddy Day Care; Rebound. All PG movies. Sure, his first movie, Next Friday, wasn't for kids, but he certainly seems on track to deliver only family friendly films these days. So far, James has been pretty successful in his transition from TV to movies. Of course, it helped that in his two hit comedies he was the co-star of Will Smith and then Adam Sandler. Mall Cop will be his first vehicle as sole star unless some big name comedian is cast as one of the burglars. Considering Happy Madison is producing, that big name would have to be Sandler. With little chance of that casting happening, though, James could settle for a lesser co-star in Happy Madison regular Rob Schneider. However, then we'd again be wishing that young Macaulay Culkin was in this thing, since Schneider played one of the many semi-baddies in Home Alone 2. Honestly, I'd settle to see any kid in there -- even a young Erik Davis -- instead of James. I guess the title wouldn't make much sense then, though.
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