zack ward Tagged Articles at Cinematical
Review: Postal
Filed under: Action », Comedy », Theatrical Reviews », Fantastic Fest », Cinematical Indie »
(We're re-posting our Postal review from Fantastic Fest in conjunction with the film's theatrical release this weekend.)
There's been a little pre-release buzz on this Postal flick, most of which seems to focus on the assertion that it's either A) Uwe Boll's best film yet, or B) Uwe Boll's first good movie. Well, considering that we're talking about the guy who directed House of the Dead, Alone in the Dark and BloodRayne, "best film yet" doesn't mean a whole hell of a lot. And as far as Uwe's "first good movie" is concerned, well, I suppose we'll have to keep on waiting for that one to show up. The only difference between Postal and Boll's other films is that this one tries to be funny on purpose (and fails), whereas the other three try to be serious while delivering huge laughs.
Based on the popular video game, Postal is about a generic schlub who gradually loses his cool and eventually explodes into a violent lunatic. Imagine the Michael Douglas film Falling Down, only the screenplay was done with finger-paints, and that's pretty much what Postal is "about." There's a whole lot of mirthless wheel-spinning that focuses on stolen dolls, goofy terrorists and freaky cults, but nothing that really assumes the mantle of "central plot." Aside from one good gag in the opening scene, a creatively bizarre closing shot, one strong performance and a (very) small collection of slightly amusing (gross-out or shock value) gags, Postal is every bit as awful as Mr. Boll's earlier output.
Untitled Gehenna Project Offers Thrills and One Heck of a Cast
Filed under: Action », Thrillers », Casting », Scripts », Newsstand »
I dunno... There may be something to this "secret" thing. Just yesterday I wished that Henry Rollins would make the movie rounds again, and I wake up today to find out that he is. However, this is probably more a case of good timing, since I imagine this whole deal was made before my wish. Anyhow, The Hollywood Reporter has listed the cast that are a part of an upcoming action thriller currently called the Untitled Gehenna Project. It's strange, diverse, and kind of irresistible -- Cuba Gooding Jr., Taryn Manning, Ron Perlman, Henry Rollins, Valerie Cruz (The Dresden Files), and Ray Winstone have joined a cast that includes Jason London (the Dazed one, not the mallrat), Franky G (Saw), Zack Ward (Transformers), Stephanie Jacobson (Razor), Bill Moseley (Repo! The Genetic Opera), Sarah Ann Morris (Las Vegas), and Brandon Fobbs (The Wire).The only thing more surprising than that group of actors is what they get to do. It seems that the film is about a group of elite soldiers who are on a covert mission "to retrieve a missing scientist from an undergound lab." Cruz sends them on the mission, and Perlman is the scientist -- so far, so believable. But get this -- the group consists of Gooding, London, G, Ward, and Manning. Yes, Taryn Manning is an elite soldier. While this strange collection of tough guys/girl are on their mission, they happen upon a priestly Rollins, "who tells them that an 'ancient evil' has been released, causing their greatest fears to come to life." (Team him up with Cheech's tough priest in Machete and they'd be an unstoppable force of religious power.) Rounding things out is Winstone, who is the ed-head of the group, and Moseley and Morris, who are part of the research team.
Keith Kjornes wrote the script, and it's going to be directed by Jason Connery, who just happens to be 007 Sean's son. The script sounds like any strange thriller, but man, this cast is weird enough that it could be completely enjoyable, in that pulp sort of way.
Uwe Boll Sinks to 9/11 Humor with 'Postal'
Filed under: Action », Comedy », Trailer Trash », Cinematical Indie »
Since it's already been pretty well established that "filmmaker" Uwe Boll loves being hated, revels in his own ineptitude, and is more than content to churn out material that's "so bad it's good," we now come to another one of the guy's trademark approaches: the low-rent shock value ploy. Over the course of the past few months, Boll's been chatting away to any website that'll listen about how over-the-top, hardcore and extreme his Postal movie will be. (It's based on a resoundingly violent video game about a homicidal postal worker, so you just know we're dealing with high-end material here.)In an effort to hype his latest project (no, not that awesome-looking Dungeon Siege thing, which I can't wait to see), Boll has unleashed a teaser video from Postal ... one that packs footage that looks a lot like a victim's-eye-view of the 9/11 attacks. A very amusing site called Bollbashers.com is where you can see the video clip, and I guess it'll make you either very sad or very angry at Mr. Boll. My advice would be to just watch the clip and then forget about it; Boll gets more than enough free publicity as it is.
Far as I can tell, Postal is still in search of American distribution. (I guess being the director of House of the Dead, Alone in the Dark and BloodRayne doesn't earn you a lot of friends on the U.S. distribution circuit.) The flick's got a pretty, um, eclectic collection of performers, with Zack Ward in the lead role and folks like Dave Foley, Seymour Cassel, Verne Troyer and David Huddleston populating the background. (Yes, I said David Huddleston.) If you need a somewhat lengthier taste of what Postal is all about, check out the "secret trailer" over at YouTube. And be sure to share your thoughts on that "9/11 teaser." Is it tasteless for a filmmaker to make broad jokes about this particular tragedy -- or is it just offensive because the jokes are coming from a guy as witless as Uwe Boll? (I'm going with the latter.)
The Year Ahead for Uwe Boll and His Fan(s)
Filed under: Action », Comedy », Horror », Independent », Sci-Fi & Fantasy », Comic/Superhero/Geek », Remakes and Sequels », Games and Game Movies », Cinematical Indie »
So it's been a little while since I posted anything about Uwe Boll, but this rather excellent article from GameDaily was precisely what I needed to recharge my Boll batteries. With no less than six inevitably awesome projects in the works, I suppose we can get ready for 2007: The Year of the Boll. Ugh, let's just break this celluloid carnage down into bullet points:- In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale -- The $60 million all-star action-adventure is, as they say, "in the can" and clocking in at just over two hours in length. Boll promises a nearly 3-hour version on DVD. The flick recently played at AFM and allegedly received ... praise! Awesome.
- BloodRayne 2 -- The $8.5 million sequel swaps Kristanna Loken for Natassia Malthe, but brings in Michael Pare to play Pat Garrett and Zack Ward for Billy the Kid. Yeah, it's a western -- and Billy the Kid is also a vampire. Yes, seriously. Regarding the subtler nuances of subtextual characterization, Boll says "We're going more bad ass in a way because BloodRayne does not have the internal battle of morality and integrity." Sounds like someone's been going to English class! Oh, and apparently there will almost definitely be a BloodRayne 3. Sweet!
- Postal -- Nearing completion and inevitably whacked. Guess who's starring? Zack Ward and Michael Pare. It's like DeVito/Douglas/Turner all over again.
- Seed -- Still coming somewhat soon: A horror movie. Michael Pare is starring. Yeah, Boll's found his muse in the Eddie and the Cruisers dude. IMDb says this movie is "completed," so keep your eyes peeled as you wander past that $5.50 DVD rack at Walmart.
- Far Cry -- Production begins in Hawaii this May, and Uwe seems pretty pumped about this particular project. Jason Statham may star, but apparently he's waiting to see how Dungeon Siege is received before he signs on with Boll again. (Statham must have a new agent.) Boll expects game company Ubisoft to be extra-helpful where the Far Cry movie is concerned, which hasn't happened on his previous projects ... for various and obvious reasons.
- Alone in the Dark 2 -- With his hilariously packed schedule, Boll couldn't possibly direct this (entirely unnecessary) sequel, so he's handing the franchise off to the guys who wrote the first Alone in the Dark -- which is sort of like leaving a lit candle in charge of 45 megatons of dynamite. Christian Slater might be returning for the sequel, but if not the director definitely wants someone "who looks like" the character in the video game. This guy's casting agents must have the world's funnest job.
...and when all this is over and done with, Uwe Boll wants to direct a movie about the Vietnam War. So which one will it be: Medal of Honor or Call of Duty? And how big will Michael Pare's role be?
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